sometimes

sometimes

it's as if he isn't

. . . gone . . .

.:.

there he is

~ laughing at a joke ~

there he is

~ on the bed across the room ~

there he is

~ in the mirror ~

{and no – not just your reflection}

.:.

you know

it's not him

not really

& the sight of him

scares you

instead of comforting you

because he's

. . . no . . .

you just can't say it

.:.

but he's always there

just at the e.d.g.e.

you can hear his wicked laughter

see his devious smile

& suddenly there he is again

standing before you

plain as day

& you know

this is just

a trick of the mind

.:.

so you s.c.r.e.a.m.

{cover your ears}

& scream

because he's gone

dead. dead. dead.

& everything s.t.u.t.t.e.r.s. – stalls

& the illusion suddenly implodes

showering you

with shattered fragments

{cover your eyes}

.:.

when you finally dare

to look

~ peering through shaking fingers ~

you realize he really is

. . . gone . . .

& suddenly you wish

your mind would

play tricks on you again

{ please }