Well, Rogue Phiores here. I'm pretty new at this, so I would appreciate feedback, but which writer doesn't?

This story isn't beta'ed and English isn't my native language, I sincerely hope it isn't too much of a problem during the reading of this. Hope you can fully enjoy yourself. :) I'm sure I did while writing.

Warnings: Angst, I guess, female Eren too and maybe more in other chapters. But this is just the epilogue so it isn't that long. Oh well.

I don't own SnK/AoT in any way.

So on with the story.

She didn't like looking at herself.

In fact, she hated it.

It reminded her of her incompetence- her shortcomings. Her gender.

Basically everything she wasn't happy about of herself.

She ran a hand through her hair which was cut in a boyish cut. She still remembered what Armin's grandfather said while cutting it as neatly as he could. That it was a pity of her silky, long and wavy hair. But he respected her decision. Eren herself felt nothing though. And even if it was much shorter, it still had the softness of a girl's hair. She lightly tugged a strand of brown hair between her fingers while thinking that.

She frowned, making her eyebrows knit together while giving her face a complete once over. She was still feminine. Too feminine. She still had her big eyes, framed with thick and long lashes. She still had her soft and feminine features. Still had she her feminine build- that, it seems, will never get bulky or intimidating. Like a boy's- no, a man's.

She would never be able to look completely like a boy or man. Even if she tried her hardest. She wanted to be like her brother. He was obviously male and people were easily intimidated by him, without needing to be bulky. But she was neither intimidating or bulky. That's why he always protected her, because she was weak. Because she was a girl.

A strange noise came out of her throat. It was a sound of disgust. She was disgusted with herself- she hated that she is feminine and would never be able to change that completely. How hard she even tried. It was out of her reach, resulting in her hating her situation even more. She was weak. A weak woman, like all the other women. She hated it.

Our heroine didn't have such hate for her gender before. No, she liked it as a younger child. She loved her cute, long and slightly wavy hair. She actually loved her big, expressive eyes. And always told herself that with her smaller and shorter build she easily could get away with things. She liked to tell herself that it made her swift and agile. It would give her an upper hand, she told herself that it will make up for her lack of power. She always told herself that when the big, bad bullies- who were boys- made fun of her gender.

She wanted to show them. It was her goal. Because she needed to show them that women could be strong, too. She would join the militairy- as a girl. And they would want her in the millitairy, because she was a good fighter. Because she was able to defeat titans.

Yes, they would need to accept her in the militairy. Because she was strong. Because she was capable. Like a boy.

She wouldn't let all those stupid boys tell her that she was a girl and because of that couldn't join the millitairy. Even if it was the truth.

She lived in a sexist world where women were forbidden to join the millitairy. They were too emotional and weak for that. They wouldn't be able to handle the pressure. They just needed to stay home and cook or sew or anything that wasn't too hard or manly.

She thought, as a young and innocent child, that she could change that- because she would show them how strong she was. As a female.

Eren laughed hollowly. There was no real mirth to be heard. She simply laughed at her younger self who always thought that women were strong too- just in different ways. She gripped the sink tightly while leaning on it because she was shaking too much to stand properly.

The idea of a woman being strong was laughable.

It was harsh reality- and that was why she wanted to be a boy, a man. They were strong. Like Corporal Levi and Commander Smith. They were powerful- hell, Corporal Levi was humanity's strongest and he wasn't female. He was male. This proved her point even further.

But, like she said before, she wasn't as bitter as this before. Hell, she was a happy child. A confident child. Confident in her gender.

It all changed when she wasn't strong enough.

When she was wasn't capable enough. She still is, but now she comes closer to being strong. To being a boy. She will join the millitairy, as a boy, and will be treated as such. Because she needs to avenge her mother. She needs to kill every titan. And she can only do that as a boy. Because they were capable and women were not.

But first, let me tell you how it all happened.

It all began with a simple, sunny day in 845, the day the wall of Maria fell.

The day her mother got eaten by the Smiling titan in front of her own eyes.

The day it all changed.

Well, I tried. I think I am gonna butcher her character too much oh god. I hope she isn't going to be too angsty for you guys, but honestly I like this. It's kinda twisted? I, until now, have only read fem!Eren stories where she was so happy after all and in the anime he still is determined and all but I honestly can't understand that? Like wow whut

But I kinda changed some things so it fits with my idea. Not so much.

I think.

Well, anyway. Hope y'all enjoyed it. 'till the first chapter, aye

Rogue Phiores out.