He always knows when I'm lying. Always. Sometimes he has doubts when I'm telling the truth. But no matter how many people I have fooled, Kyle always understands me. He always accepts me.

We've been through so much together, I sometimes forget he hates me. I sometimes forget I'm supposed to hate him in return. To hate him for calling me fat. Hate him for being a smartass. For being Jewish.

Damn him for being Jewish.

He does know he's going to Hell, doesn't he?

No, he doesn't. Because he's Jewish. And he's going to Hell, where I won't be. Because regardless of my sins, I can just repent and my loving God will forgive me. And even if I didn't go to Heaven, I'm sure Jews go to different parts of Hell.

Damn that sneaky Jew-rat. Going away from me, just because he dies.

I wish he weren't Jewish. If he weren't, he'd definitely go to Heaven. He wouldn't be seperated for me, and would be with me for eternity. The only person who understands me. I can't lose him.

I'll do anything.


He knows when I'm lying. He won't be manipulated. He understands me. I can't let him go.

"Oh, and Kyle? Happy Passover."

"Happy Passover, Cartman."

I'll do anything. Even become Jewish.

.oOxoxoOo.