Sam's body ached. They'd been driving for a couple of hours and Dean had been uncharacteristically quiet for most of the trip. Sam knew his brother was hiding something and as much as he liked to think they'd finally moved past the need to keep secrets from one another, Dean was always going to try and protect him. Sam knew he'd never be able to convince his brother it wasn't necessary. Dean seemed to have missed the part where Sam was no longer a child. To Dean, Sam would always be his little brother and even though it annoyed Sam to no end, he couldn't fault his brother for loving him. After all, Sam had been known to keep his own fair share of secrets for much the same reason.

Sam shifted in his seat and let out an involuntary moan. He quickly tried to cover it with a yawn but Dean wasn't fooled.

"Dude, you okay?" Dean gave him a glance, his battered face full of concern. "Stupid question. Of course, you're not okay."

"I'm fine, Dean. What about you? I can drive for a while if you need me to."

Dean gave him an incredulous look. "You were shot, Sam! I don't think you need to be driving."

"You didn't seem to mind it when I saved your ass back there."

"Shut up."

Sam tried not to laugh and failed. His hand automatically went to his injured side, as if he could hold back the pain. He was hurting worse than he cared to admit but he knew Dean wanted to make it back to the bunker.

"Okay, that's it. We're stopping at the next motel."

"Dean, really, I'm fine."

Dean sighed. "Sammy, you're pale as a ghost."

"We need to get back to the bunker…..we have research…..we have to find a way to save Cas…" Sam sucked in his breath as they hit a bump in the road, closing his eyes against the pain.

"Dammit, Sam, all that can wait." Dean's voice had softened and when Sam opened his eyes again, he saw Dean swiping at his own.

"Dean….."

"We're stopping, Sam." Dean cleared his throat before continuing. "There's a motel a few miles up ahead. Just hang in there, okay?"

Sam nodded, leaning his head back against the seat and closing his eyes once again. He knew there was no arguing with Dean on this matter and he couldn't deny that for once he was glad. If Dean had wanted to drive another 1100 miles to get back to the bunker, Sam wouldn't have muttered a word against it even though right now he felt as though he wouldn't make it to the next motel, which was only a couple of miles down the road.


Sam had fallen into a fitful sleep but jerked awake when Dean opened the car door.

"Easy, Sammy." Dean reached for Sam's arm. "Come on, I got you."

Sam started to push Dean's hand away but as his feet hit the asphalt, he realized how weak he was. Whatever pain killer they'd pumped him full of at the urgent care facility had begun to wear off and with it, his feeling of being able to conquer the world. He leaned heavily against his brother, who helped him to their motel room.

Once inside the motel, Sam collapsed onto the nearest bed. He tried to shrug out of his jacket but found he lacked the strength to do even that. Without a word, Dean knelt at his side and removed his jacket and shoes.

"Thanks, bro." Sam murmured, his eyes heavy.

"Get some rest, Sammy."

Sam tried to tell his brother to do the same but he couldn't make his mouth form the words. Exhaustion overtook him and swept him away.


Sammy, I couldn't let her take you.

Sam felt pressure on his hand…..Dean's hand, holding his own.

I did what I had to.

A sob. Dean was crying.

I couldn't lose you, Sammy. I can't. I won't.

Sam tried to tell his brother he wasn't going anywhere but he was so tired…..so very tired.

Billie…

the Empty…

won't let you go alone…

Sam struggled to connect the words his brother was saying but his body still demanded rest. With every ounce of strength he had, he managed to close his fingers over his brother's hand and as he slipped back into darkness, he felt Dean grip his fingers tight.


When Sam finally opened his eyes, he found Dean asleep in a chair next to his bed. He couldn't fully remember what time they'd arrived at the motel but according to his watch and the sky outside their window, he could have been sleeping for an hour or almost twenty-five…..the latter seemed much more likely. He hoped like hell Dean hadn't been sitting in that chair the whole time he'd been asleep.

He tried to sit up and found that his wound was still very sore but at least the pain didn't threaten to consume him. He reached for a glass of water on his bedside table and the pills Dean had placed there. He took one of the antibiotics and after reading the label on the other bottle, he downed two pain pills for good measure. As he placed the pills back on the nightstand he found Dean staring at him.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself." Dean rubbed at his eyes. "How are you feeling?"

"Better, I think." Sam cautiously put his feet on the floor to test the theory.

"Good."

"What about you?"

"Me?" Dean stretched, grimacing when he realized he'd stretched too far with his busted ribs. "I'm fine as frog hair."

Sam highly doubted that but didn't push the matter…..yet. "How long was I out?"

"Little over a day."

"Please tell me you weren't sitting in that chair the whole time."

"Not the whole time." Dean grinned. "I did get up to piss occasionally."

Sam frowned. "You should have been resting."

"I wasn't moving." Dean shrugged. "I'd call that resting."

Sam rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean."

They were both silent for a moment.

"Dean, while I was out…..I heard you talking."

"Yeah?"

"What happened when you thought I was dead?"

"I told you…"

Sam held up his hand, shaking his head. "Don't lie to me, Dean. I know you. You'd never have left me alone if you thought I was still alive."

"Sammy….."

"Just tell me, Dean!"

"I can't." Dean's eyes filled with tears. "I just…..I don't want to talk about it…..or think about it. I almost lost you, Sammy."

"But you didn't, Dean." Sam swallowed against the lump in his throat. "I'm right here."

Dean managed a smile through his tears. "I know. I just….I'll tell you, okay? Just not today….I…I can't do it today."

Sam nodded. "Okay. I understand."

The look on Dean's face told Sam he wasn't even close to understanding but whatever burden his brother was carrying would have to wait until another day. Right now he looked as if he could use a month's worth of sleep.

"How's your head?" asked Sam.

"It's fine. How many times do I have to tell you I'm fine?"

"Until I believe it."

Dean gave an exasperated sigh. "I've been better, okay? You happy now?"

"Ecstatic. Now get some sleep." Sam pushed himself up from the bed and Dean was immediately on his feet. Sam grinned at him. "I'm going to the bathroom so unless you want to help with that….."

As Sam shuffled off toward the bathroom, Dean crawled into the other bed, mumbling under his breath, "As if I've never wiped your ass before."


Thanks for reading! Comments are always welcome!

This fic celebrates my seven year anniversary writing fanfiction! Thanks to all those who have supported me through the years. I appreciate you more than you know!