What Agni has done that night was terribly, terribly wrong. That thought kept him staring at the ceiling in the dark, unable to sleep. Now that the moment had ended and the passion had cooled, the act could not be disguised. It was no order he had followed, no form of 'worship' towards his personal god.
He could not pretend that he hadn't had sex with his personal god.
He wished he couldn't called it making love instead. Yes, he loved his prince, but the act being set between the two of them seemed too vulgar to be called that. Try as he might, he could never feel cleansed of his old life, though he had already forgotten his old name. What had he done, following his desires, when it could be said that he'd dirtied his god?
He shuddered, his eyes squeezing shut and his brows knitter tightly in disgust at his own lack of self control. Prince Soma was still young, young enough for lust to shamelessly overwhelm his senses. He, unlike Agni, had reason and excuse to have made the mistake. And what if he came to regret it? As if cued to heighten Agni's fears, the prince squirmed in his sleep, a soft whimper emitting from his throat. His breath heated Agni's bare chest, gentle and rhythmic. Agni's arms tightened around the younger man as his heart thudded in panic.
He need not imagine how the Prince's brothers would act if they found out. He was well aware of their poor opinion of Prince Soma and his impulsive ways. Their taunts toward Agni were even more extreme, escalating more than once to violence. If they were to find out, Agni was sure the small fights Soma's brothers had picked on him would turn into full out attacks.
Agni huffed softly, careful not to wake Soma, and let his eyes fall upon the sleeping Prince's face. His cheek was pressed against Agni's chest, his face calmer than could ever be seen awake. It seemed certain that he was not, at least not yet, worried. Agni brushed a lock of hair from his face, tucking it behind his ear as gently as if he were awake to feel it. He leaned as forward as he could, pressing his lips against Soma's forehead. As he pulled away, he noticed Soma's eyelashes fluttering and he tensed in worry. Golden eyes gazed up at him sleepily through long lashes.
"Agni, sleep too..." he murmured, his eyes falling closed as he drifted back into sleep. Agni's lips tugged into a smile as he mumbled to the already dreaming prince, "Jo agna."
