Note: I do not own 'Gossip Girl' but do own my character. I haven't read the books yet so it's more focused on the TV show. The stuff in bold is Gossip Girl's commentary. Enjoy!


All the focus these past few weeks has been on C and M, not the fighting between S and B. N still seems to be in the middle, fighting feelings for both girls. We all know C isn't the one girl-one guy type so why is he always with M? Has the new girl tamed the wild beast? Only time will tell.

"Chuck, why is it that every guy I ask for anything turns into jelly and runs away stammering? What the hell did you do?"

He smirked and took a drink of his Scotch. He didn't want to tell Mikayla what he did. What they had was great but he still didn't want to share her with anyone else.

"You tell me now or else I'm getting out of this bed and will never come back," she threatened.

"You'll be back. You'll never find anyone else who can do what I can."

"But the fun is trying."

Mikayla got out of bed naked and walked to where her clothes were. She slipped on the dress she had worn to some party Chuck's father threw the night before. She ran her fingers through her hair before heading to the bathroom. She washed her face and used Chuck's mouthwash for the last time.

"Come back to bed."

"Not until you tell me the truth. You blacklisted me with the other guys, didn't you? I thought this was simply a fuck or get high kind of relationship, not an exclusive relationship. You know I don't do those. I'll fuck whomever I want."

"You'll come crawling back."

"I only get on my knees for one reason and you know it. Too bad you'll never see me on my knees again."

Chuck's face fell. Mikayla was the best and he didn't want to lose that. But he watched as she grabbed her purse and left the suite. He wasn't the type of man to run after someone, especially to say that he was wrong.

Mikayla was in the Private Resident lobby when she ran into someone she knew.

"Hey, Dan. How are you?"

"OK. Just leaving?" he asked, eying her up and down, noticing the same dress as the night before.

"Yeah. Told Chuck off so I had to leave. What did he tell you for staying away from me?"

He looked uneasy.

"Tell me."

"He threatened to beat the shit out of any guy who talked to you and after that, he'd blacklist their families from country clubs, VIP lists, and other high class shit. I'm meeting Serena so I gotta go."

Mikayla went home and cleaned up. She had planned on staying with Chuck all day, but now she had to find something to do before she went nuts. She decided to go shopping. As she was leaving, her cell rang.

"Hey, Nate. What's up?"

"I need to talk to you. Are you at Chuck's?"

"No. I'm at the townhouse if you want to come over. Will this conversation need liquid support or herbal?"

"Liquid at least. Maybe some herbal. I'll be over in 15 minutes."

Mikayla waited downstairs for Nate to show up. He looked like shit. They went upstairs where Mikayla pushed him onto the couch and handed him a glass of Scotch. She grabbed a glass for herself and sat down beside him, cross legged and facing him.

"Something happened between you and Blair?"

"Yeah."

"And it had to do with Serena. From my first day here, I noticed how you looked at her. So tell me what happened."

He gulped down the liquor and she refilled it. He drank half before turning to her.

"I said the wrong name last night when Blair and I were fooling around. Blair kicked me out of bed and told me never to talk to her again. I love her but it's different than the way I love Serena. I need your advice because you're not one of Blair's followers and will be truthful to me. What can I do to get Serena?"

"Nate, I'm not the best person to ask. I've only had one real relationship and it burned me badly."

"You're the only person who isn't biased," he said, almost pleading.

"OK. Do you know how Serena feels about you? If she wasn't with Dan, would she date you?"

"Probably. We always had this connection."

"That's not good enough. Were you close? Did you talk about things that you couldn't talk to anyone else about? Or was it just the sex? Are your feelings deeper because she's with someone who isn't you? Are these real feelings of love or are you jealous?"

"I don't know. I mean, we did talk about things, some I've never told anyone else. I don't want her to be with Dan. I thought it would be simple. I would break up with Blair and Serena and I would start dating."

"Nothing is ever that simple. Especially after those things leaked about her and the Institute. Would she trust you if you said you had nothing to do with that?"

"But I didn't. Blair and Chuck did that," he said, finishing off the drink.

Mikayla handed him a small joint, which he lit.

"Let this play out. Maybe Serena and Dan won't last because they're so different. When they break up, go after her but for now, I'd suggest to try to reclaim the friendship you once had. You shouldn't do anything to break them up because Serena will always remember what you did and will never fully trust you again."

"And if she won't let me be friends with her? I'll have no one but Chuck, who seems to be friendlier with Blair lately."

"You'll have me, the new girl whose not really friends with anyone."

Mikayla took the joint and finished it off before pulling Nate into a hug.

"It'll all work out," she said, before kissing his cheek.

The two of them pulled apart and looked into each other's eyes. It was Nate who leaned in and kissed Mikayla. She returned the kiss and ran her fingers through his hair. Nate grabbed her around the waist and pulled her closer. A hand went under her shirt and cupped a breast. Then he pulled back.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be doing this."

"If you really meant that, your hand wouldn't still be cupping my breast. Besides, I'm not stopping you. This might be exactly you need. An innocent, no strings attached fuck. Dealing with the whole Blair and Serena situation and not getting any from Blair have made you all tense and stressed. This will help with that."

Nate blushed and removed his hand.

"No one has to know, if you're worried. My housekeeper is grocery shopping and no one knows you're here, right? So all I'm saying is if you want to, we can."

Mikayla got off the couch and stood in front of Nate. He stood and kissed her. As they kissed, they moved backwards to the edge of the bed.

"I want to."

Mikayla undid the buttons on Nate's shirt and slipped it off. He reached down and pulled her T-shirt off. Next they removed each other's pants. Both in their underwear, they got into bed. Mikayla disappeared under the covers for a minute before tossing Nate's boxers to the floor. She stayed under the covers for awhile. When she came up, she wiped the back of her hand across her lips and smiled at Nate. He had tilted his head back and closed his eyes when she was under the covers. He opened his eyes and wrapped his arms around her.

He reached for her bra clasp and threw it to the floor once it was off. He took each breast into a hand and massaged them. Mikayla threw her head back and moaned. He pulled her close and rolled so now he was on top of her naked body.

"Do you have…"

"Night stand," she said, cutting him off.

Nate reached over and pulled out a condom. She took it from him and ripped it open. Mikayla reached down and slipped it onto him. He kissed her and she wrapped her legs around his body and waited for him to enter her. He did without hesitation.

When they finished, they stayed in bed for a bit. Mikayla asked if he wanted more Scotch and he accepted so she got out of bed to get the glasses and the bottle. On her way back she knocked over her purse and her cell phone fell out. She bent down to pick it up.

"Five missed calls. Gee, I wonder who it was. Chuck, Chuck, Chuck, my dad, and Chuck. I know what he wants and it's too bad that I don't give a flying fuck anymore," she said, before flinging her cell to the couch and getting back into bed.

She caught Nate looking at her exposed body. Mikayla stuck out her chest at him.

"Like what you see?" she asked.

"Who wouldn't? No wonder why Chuck wanted you all to himself."

"I'm not a possession. No one owns me."

Nate finished off his Scotch and got out of bed. He got dressed and looked at Mikayla.

"Thanks for everything. You were right. That was exactly what I needed."

"Don't mention it. I'll always be here if you need to talk, hang out, or release some stress. I'm famished. Did you want to go and get something to eat?"

Guess who was spotted with M at Divino Ristorante? No, it wasn't C. It seems B's ex-boyfriend has moved on to the next available girl. Wouldn't it be best for N to be single right now? Maybe so I can wiggle my way in and get some of that hot ass.

When Mikayla arrived at school the next morning, there was a group of people in the hallway. She heard Chuck's voice, which was angry, so she pushed through the mob. Chuck had his best friend up against the lockers.

"What the hell were you doing with Mikayla at Divino's?"

"Chuck, nothing happened. I needed to talk to someone and she said she was hungry. We ate and talked. Nothing else."

"What the fuck," Mikayla said, grabbing Chuck's hands and pulling them away from Nate's collar. "Nothing happened."

"I don't believe you because I know you too well," he said looking at her.

"I repeat, nothing happened, but if you don't believe me, here you go."

Mikayla kissed Nate deeply and moved his hands to her ass. She broke the kiss and left the mob. Just as she stepped outside the group of people, she was stopped a slap to the face. Blair stood in front of her, with murder in her eyes.

"What the hell do you think you're doing to my boyfriend?"

"Last I heard you're not together anymore. Chuck was angry for no reason so I gave him one. Oh, and Blair, if you ever try to slap me again, I'll kick your ass all the way to bankruptcy," she seethed before leaving.

Further down the hall, Mikayla saw Serena and jogged to catch up.

"Serena, I have a hypothetical question to ask you."

"Shoot."

"If you weren't dating Dan, would you start to date Nate now that he's single? He's worried you won't have anything to do with him because of the stunt Blair and Chuck pulled at the Ivy Party. Speaking of which, if you ever need to talk to someone, I've been there. It's hard but having someone your own age who has been through it helps."

"I've never thought of Nate like that. He was always Blair's boyfriend and a great friend. The thing that happened between us just happened. There was no real reason for it.

"And what Blair announced at the Ivy Party was wrong. I'm not a patient at the Ostroff Institute. My brother is; he tried to commit suicide."

"Oh, I'm sorry. If he needs to talk, he can call me. I've tried to do the ultimate step too," she said, pulling up her sleeve and showing Serena her wrist.

Down the middle of her tattoo was a scar, about 2 inches long.

"It's been a year and a half and the feeling of desperation of ending it all still hasn't gone away. There have been times when I almost went through with it again but I always stopped. I don't know why this time and not the first time. But if your brother needs to talk, he can call day or night."

Mikayla pushed her sleeve down and walked away. Dan came up behind Serena and kissed her cheek. Serena said something and Dan looked at Mikayla's shrinking figure.

There seems to be skeletons in M's closet, next to the Gucci and Prada. A loyal insider overheard M telling S about her own suicide attempt. Did C and N know what they were getting themselves into when they started to see her? What pushed M over the edge? You know I'll try to find out. XOXO Gossip Girl.