At the Weigh Station

ADS January Fic Challenge
Spoilers/Setting: Crichton Kicks/Promises
Genre(s): Drama
Word Count: 3880

Test driven by Vinegardog, but all mistakes are mine.

Disclaimer: The characters and universe of Farscape are the property of the Henson Co.

The assault didn't go as planned. The fortress was harder to penetrate than they expected. The Hokothians were better armed than the intelligence reports said. Three members of the squad got caught behind enemy lines. They were sure they were done for.

Former Peacekeeper Officer Aeryn Sun leaned back against the wall, closed her eyes, and breathed hard. This was that moment when her former human shipmate said you see your life pass before your eyes. That moment when you know it's too late, no matter what you do, you're going to die.

As she stood there breathing, trying to accept this was the end, only the last three and a half cycles flashed through her mind. Images of Pilot, Moya, D'Argo, Zhaan, Chiana, Rygel and Jool tripped quickly over themselves, blending together too fast to keep up. Her mind quickly switched gears to Crichton.

It always came down to John Crichton. She remembered their first meeting, attacking him because she didn't get why he was out of uniform. What trick was that? The time with the Draks, begging him to be like family and kill her if the living death took her. There was the first time she experienced jealousy towards Gilina during their time on the Zelbinion.

She remembered that day she found him unconscious outside Maldis's compound. That was the moment she realized Crichton had become a friend she didn't want to lose. Then when NamTar injected her with Pilot's DNA, she learned that she could trust John to be there for her. Once more he saved her life.

There was that terrible moment in the pod, when they were stuck in the Flax that she realized she didn't want to live if Crichton didn't. It was more than the fact that he was a shipmate who she promised she wouldn't let down. At that point he had become more important than her own life.

After he got lost for three months on Acquara, scaring at least a cycle off her life, they found him again. The first thing to go had been that beard. It was the first, and only time, Aeryn had found him unattractive. Leaning her head back against the wall, digging in and trying to find a way out of this situation, she still found humor in that moment. She hadn't hesitated to tell him that he looked like a molly wool-cat.

That was right before they met Chiana in a collision with a Nebari vessel. Crichton saved Moya, and everyone on board from her 'hero' Durka. At that moment Aeryn knew she was no longer a Peacekeeper. She no longer identified with the 'Greatest Peacekeeper Captain' of all time. Now she saw herself as one of 'them', the criminals who didn't accept Peacekeeper life.

She had had the chance to see John's world once. Yes it was an Ancient induced representation of Earth, but John said it was pretty accurate. Although he had pulled the gun on her, she understood his confusion of the moment; and had never feared that he would actually hurt her. She would have loved to have seen his home world for real and enjoy the experience of meeting his family. That tradition seemed to hold special meaning for him, of the girl he wanted to take home to meet the folks.

All too quickly their disordered run from the Peacekeepers had become even more stressful. Larraq had come on board with the virus that stabbed her. John had entered the Gammak base to save her. "This mission is foolhardy Crichton. It makes no sense for you to be killed as well. Let's just cut our losses."

She had known he wouldn't, though. For some reason he always tried to protect her. "Drop the martyr routine Aeryn. I'm not gonna let you die." She had awoken to find out he had been captured. Her relief at finding him in that cell alive and in far better shape than she had expected, could never be expressed. That was also the day she had met Stark.

Stark, who could never be defined. Sometimes he was the most lucid of characters. Sometimes he was completely mad. That was when Scorpius had discovered John's existence and put that frelling chip in his brain. And Gilina had died.

Shortly after that Moya had given birth to Talyn and suddenly Crais was back, an ally instead of an enemy. Crais, who was dead now, with Talyn, the hero's death he had strived for, no longer a Peacekeeper.

She remembered being in John's body, an experience for which there was no equal. Aeryn really couldn't blame him about his curiosity, since she had had her own questions answered. "You were in my shoes; I was in your pants—." That had ended with another smiling moment.

Before they could relax they had found themselves dealing with three very different John Crichtons. Each evolution had its good sides, but her John was the best. He was a perfect mix of compassion and logic.

A simple supply run had ended with John married to another woman. Never had she been so jealous. It was the second time she'd experienced that feeling and this time it was so much worse. She had so badly wanted to rip the princess's over painted face off. Instead she had gone on that ill fated climb with Dregon. It wasn't like John had really wanted the marriage, as he had said, "Better wed than dead." And she could see that, but had still hated it. Then she had left him unprotected in that vulnerable statue state. Never again she had vowed, would she leave him alone to fight his battles.

When next she turned around, the Scarrans had captured him. The state he was in when he had escaped was enough to drive all of them into the center halo, which had been a really bad idea. She still didn't know what to make of that experience.

Then Stark and D'Argo had dragged them into the Shadow Depository theft and John had lost his battle to Scorpius's clone. Aeryn had miscalculated and the clone had killed her. She had never blamed John. He had tried to warn them all. She had made it back from that one, but they had lost Zhaan. Zhaan who was truly the mother she'd never had. One more regret.

And then the crew returned from a supply run with two John Crichtons. This time she couldn't tell them apart. When Talyn and Crais arrived, she had learned that her real mother was trying to capture Moya's child. When she had left with them one John had gone with her.

In the belly of the largest beast, she had realized that she couldn't live without John Crichton. When Talyn had spaced him she had experienced the greatest fear. That was the day John had shown her his guiding star.

He had held her when she had met the hardened shell her mother had become. And he had protected her from her own Peacekeeper instincts that had almost pushed for her to kill Xhalax.

Then Furlow had frelled things up. The images sped past quicker now. Crais, Stark, Rygel all fighting to keep the Scarrans from getting their hands on such a dangerous weapon. And then John was gone. "Some things you die for."

But then there he was, still him. Still the proud, protective man he'd always been. And he had been determined to fulfill the mission he'd given himself. Suddenly she had found herself on the command carrier she had grown up on. Three cycles later, it didn't feel like home. John had been wearing that frelling bracelet which made him a bigger target than normal. That Commandant had made an appearance and freaked Scorpius out.

Aeryn had found out she was pregnant and everything had changed so fast. John had taken Scorpius down the wormhole as a distraction; Crais and Talyn had died in a flash of starburst. Henta, dear Henta,had faced her down with a pulse pistol. There had been a rapid explosion, a quick retreat off the carrier. The first home she'd ever known was gone and suddenly they were picking up Talyn's remains.

Together the three of them, John, D'Argo and herself, had brought down the psychotic Leviathan in the sacred burial space. Aeryn had realized she couldn't distinguish this John from the one she had lost, and her memories had blurred together, becoming one. For the first time in her life she had understood John's expression of needing space, but he hadn't given it to her.

It had all come down to that coin toss. "We're in the hands of fate now. We have to trust in that. Fly safe."

All of these thoughts jumped through her mind in microts as she remained behind the wall. She hit her head back into the bulkhead in frustration.

She had so many regrets. Her friends, or rather her family, would never know what happened to her. Then there was the loss of experiencing the joys of motherhood, as this child would soon die with her. As a mist filled the room, her biggest regret was that she wouldn't see John Crichton again.

The mist caused her to cough and squint her eyes. Aeryn looked through the smoke at a dark figure making its way toward her. It was no one from her team. Except for her two fellow mercenaries crouching around the corner, everyone else had made it out. But this figure was familiar. At first, the way he moved made her think of John. It couldn't be him, he was still on Moya.

As the figure drew closer, she realized he was Sebacean, tall and broad shouldered. He had very dark hair, pulled back in a pony-tail over his red vest. The clothing was so similar to what John might have worn she thought her mind was playing tricks on her.

"Officer Sun?" he asked, leaving no doubt that he was there for her. "Follow me. I can get your team out, but we've got to move now."

"Who are you?" she asked.

"Off topic. That's need to know only, and right now you don't need to know." When she didn't move fast enough for him, he grabbed her arm and dragged her up, "On your feet soldier. Now!"

She shook herself out of her confusion and took stock of the situation. They couldn't go forward and the way in had been blocked. This stranger seemed to know where to go, so she decided to trust him. They were quickly joined by the other two mercenaries and they began fighting their way out.

In what seemed to take arns, but was probably only microts, they were outside. The Hokathian sun light was especially harsh. Aeryn could already feel her temperature rising. They took cover as pulse blasts whizzed by them.

In the bright light, Aeryn was finally able to get a good look at her savior. He looked so much like John, only younger. Seeing him here in this rubble reminded her of another fire fight, on a long lost Gammak Base. Only this time she was the one needing rescue.

The soldier turned away from her taking count of their attackers. He crouched down and opened a bag. Handing her a few explosives, he asked, "You know what to do with these?"

"I think I can handle it," she smarted back.

"Good, because a fire-fight is no time to learn." He gestured over to the far side. "We need to blow a hole through that wall. You go ahead; I'll cover your six." Without giving her a chance to argue, he stepped out into the fire zone, drawing away the enemy attack.

Aeryn crouch walked to the wall, turning on the charges as she went. She locked them in place and shouted "Down!" before ducking behind a rock herself. The two mercenaries were through the hole first. Aeryn refused to leave without their rescuer.

"Go! I'm right behind you!" he shouted as he backed toward their exit. He threw a few grenades at the approaching forces and tucked in behind her. A few moments later, they were at the prowler. Her two comrades had already ditched them leaving Aeryn's prowler behind. They quickly strapped into the ship, with Aeryn taking a back seat. She'd started shaking and she wasn't sure how straight she could fly.

It seemed to take forever before they landed. Aeryn had no idea where they were. Her rescuer reached in to help her out of her seat, and she almost hit the ground. "Steady!"

"I'm alright!" she snapped back. "Just give me a little space." After making sure she was steady on her feet, he stepped back with his arms up. It was a gesture she'd seen many times. "Who are you?" she asked again.

"I can't tell you." He gestured around them. "Welcome to this little corner of the Universe. Don't get too comfortable though. You'll be leaving shortly."

Aeryn took in her surroundings. There wasn't much around her but ice; one giant floating plane of ice. "You live here?"

He snorted, "Hardly. I'm borrowing a patch of this rock for the moment. Soon enough, I'll have you home." The soldier sat down next to a crate she hadn't noticed before. "Please, make yourself comfortable. I have a few things to do," he muttered as he turned away from her and dug into the crate.

Aeryn took in her surroundings. The ground had the appearance of ice, but it wasn't wet. The water around it seemed real enough, with whirling white circles all around. She took a moment to study the young man in front of her. He was tinkering with some gadget she'd never seen before.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm messing with the natural order of life," he snapped impatiently. "What do you think I'm doing?" He sighed. "Sorry, that was totally unfair of me. I'm not supposed to tell you anything. It's a simple mission, get in, get the girl, get out, toss her on her way and get home again. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Just get the job done." Looking over at her he asked, "How simple is that?"

She just stared. How long had he been speaking that mix of Sebacean and English? Listening to John for all these cycles, she'd gotten used to the garbled mess he spoke. To hear it from someone else was just wrong. Aeryn turned back toward him, pulling her pulse pistol out. Pointing it at him she demanded, "Who are you and what have you done with John?"

The young man looked up incredulously. Shaking his head in disbelief he spread his arms wide and gave in. "Dad did say you were the most fearsome woman he ever met. Really Mom, pulling a gun on your own child?"

Her brow wrinkled in confusion. "I don't have any children."

Laughing he replied, "At least not yet. And you won't if you get yourself killed on some foolhardy mission that will prove nothing to anyone but yourself."

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"Yes you do. You're out to prove you're still the big bad Peacekeeper soldier. Out to prove to Xhalax's memory that you aren't weak." He looked her over. "You told me once that it is love and family that gives you strength. Mom, put the gun away already. You're not going to shoot me and I really have to finish this."

"Only if you tell me everything."

"No, that is the last thing I can do. One does not mess with the natural order of time. Bad things happen when you do."

"So you are from the future?"

"Nah, I'm from a galaxy far far away," he snapped sarcastically. "Of course I'm from the future. A future I won't have if you get yourself killed."

Aeryn holstered her weapon and sat down with a shiver. Her 'son' studied her for a moment and then came over with an injection gun. He waved it in her face, before applying it to her neck. "The Hokathians infected you with a contagion that will induce heat delirium. I can't cure you, but I can delay the symptoms."

"You can't cure me?"

"No, I don't have the right treatment in my bag of tricks, and that's not my responsibility. I was only charged with getting you out of that hell-hole. As soon as my calculations are complete, I'll put you back in your timeline and return to mine."

"This isn't your timeline either?"

"No. It's kind of a weigh station between realities. One wrong move and everything you know is gone. Each one of those whirlpools represents a different possible outcome. I need to make sure you get back to the right one at precisely the right time. I wouldn't want to be responsible for the destruction of the world as we know it."

"And then what happens?"

"You go back to your time, telling no one of our encounter," he responded seriously.

"But-"

"You have to promise me that you will tell no one of our encounter. Promise me!" he demanded urgently.

"But why?"

"I wasn't supposed to tell you who I am. You weren't supposed to know any of this. Knowledge of the future could change decisions of the past and create a vortex in time. It's vitally important that no one acts differently from their current course because of me."

"And you would trust me to keep that promise?" she asked incredulously.

"You did before," he said simply.

"Tell me your name."

"I can't. Again, that might change your future decisions. Everything is a choice. I can't give you any anymore information about what might happen."

"Very well, I promise."

"Thank you," he replied quietly. As he returned to his work he added, "I'm putting you back into your reality about two solar days after you left. That should prevent any paradoxes and buy you enough time to get medical treatment."

"Where do I go when I get back?"

"Mom, you know the answer to that question. Just follow your heart. The only tip I'm going to give you is to accept help where you least expect it. And let time play out." A couple of clicks later and he proudly announced, "There I'm finished. I just need to attach this to your prowler and off you go."

He walked over to her ship and started tapping buttons. "What are you doing?" Aeryn asked.

"Again, I can't tell you. I wish I could, but this would definitely break all the rules." A few taps later and he stepped back. "Okay Mom, in you go."

Suddenly Aeryn was faced with the reality that this was her son and she was saying goodbye. She didn't even know if she'd ever see him again, if he would ever be born. She hadn't even told John about the baby. As if sensing her thoughts, her son leaned forward to give her a hug and whisper in her ear, "Don't worry Mom, it will all work out." He brushed a tear from her face. "Now you go. You've got a life to lead. I promise you will see me again, one day."

As the prowler started up its programmed sequence, Aeryn watched the figure of her son walking away toward another craft she noticed for the first time. It was strange, like a cross between John's module and her prowler. Before she could reflect on that, she was flung into one of those whirlpools and the island of ice was gone.

Microts later she was back in normal space. Scanning ahead, she detected a marauder nearby. She slowed her prowler down to drift mode hoping the other ship would think her a derelict and pass her by. Her concentration was fading, the heat delirium taking hold microt by microt.

When things came back into focus, Scorpius was in the cockpit with her. How that came to be, she didn't know. He offered her treatment and assistance in finding Moya. She meant to refuse but then she remembered, "The only tip I'm going to give you is to accept help where you least expect it."

Help from Scorpius? He probably knew where John was. He certainly knew how to treat heat delirium. "Officer Sun, I'll help you find Moya on one condition. I want asylum on Moya with your solemn promise that no harm will come to me."

"I can't promise that," she squeaked.

"Then—" he paused. "You'll die. But there's no reason for that. I know where Moya is, I can take you to her. You protect me, I save you. It's a reasonable exchange."

"I promise you asylum, and that we won't kill you, nothing more."

"A deal is struck then. Good." As Scorpius made himself at home, Aeryn lost consciousness once more.

When she awoke aboard Moya, she felt strange. The clothing she wore was constricting. It vibrated with cool air flowing through it. Her eyes snapped open as she remembered. The weigh station, her son, Scorpius, Moya, and finally her mind stopped on John.

She had to find John and warn him. Making her way to the transport bay, Aeryn tried to prepare for what she needed to tell John, but her mind was wandering. She had no idea how long she had been ill, or how long she'd been back on Moya. And then suddenly John was there, in front of her, wearing the most heartbreaking look on his face.

How could she tell him she was dying? Again she saw her life before her eyes, but this time it was the life she could have had if she'd never left him. The baby was never going to be born; this illness would kill her because there was no cure. The Hokathians had seen to that. Scorpius had no idea what the contagion was and could only treat the symptoms.

She could tell that she broke his heart by demanding his promise not to kill their enemy, but it was vital that she keep her promises. John was hurt that she wouldn't tell him what happened while she was away from Moya, but even if she was free to explain, he'd never believe her. Sometimes she thought it merely a dream herself.

When John came to find her, she said the words she had been feeling since she had left. "I'm really sorry."

John asked quietly, "For what?"

"For everything. This is not how I pictured coming back."

He replied pessimistically, "It's just fate—as usual, keeping it's bargain and screwing us in the fine print." Before they went back down that road, he quickly changed the topic. "So how did you catch this cold? Dancing… barefoot in the rain?"

Aeryn tensed up. "I can't talk to you about that."

"Why not?" he asked, pain in his voice.

She chose her words carefully, "I really… want to tell you. But I can't. And we need to leave it at that." Aeryn prayed that he would let it go; she knew she didn't have the energy to argue.

She had made a promise she had to keep.