Karma is a B*%$#

Summary: Agon finally gets what's coming to him. Pairing Fem!SenaXAgon. Rated T for Agon's language and some mature themes.
Disclaimer: I do not own E21.


Kongo Agon, the man with the god speed impulses whom every man and woman either wanted to be, or be with. He was at the very pinnacle of perfection, and at the age of twenty-four he had it all. He had a career as a professional football player in America, a mansion, luxury cars, basically anything and everything he wanted. In short, he was living the good life. But it is not like material possessions were the only thing he had and valued.

There were other things that mattered to him which could not be bought at a store. One example of such things would be his family. His wife, formerly known as Kobayakawa Sena, currently known as Kongo Sena(a fact that always leaves him smug.) Though he would never admit it to anyone, she was probably the most important person to him, and he would gladly kill the fucktards who would try to mess with her.

The latter statement had already been proven during his college years, when some delinquents, after being rejected in their offer of a good time, started trying to drag her off. He didn't kill them literally, but when he was through with them he was pretty sure that they'd be eating from a straw for months at least. Nobody got away with taking or ruining Agon's property, and of course this rule also applied to his woman.

One should not expect to get away from Agon after trying to hog Sena's time and attention(which would be better spent on him, Agon thinks) without a couple of bruises. It just wasn't gonna happen, unless you were either family(either Agon or Sena's), teammates(either former or current), or close friends(Sena's, but Agon was more than tempted to sock a few of them because he was pretty sure friends don't give you looks of longing.)

But we're getting off track. Basically, he was in a very good place in life and he believed things would stay that way. But of course, things don't always go as planned, and as they say Karma is a bitch. This is a lesson that even the great Agon will learn the hard way. Let's face it, with everything that the man has done in the past to the present, no one who knows him personally will disagree that he already accumulated five lifetimes worth of Karma.


The first time Karma hits him hard is at age twenty five, but it is only at a party does he admit this to his older brother. "Ugh, Unko-chan, I've created a monster." He groans out before he downs his drink in one go and sets the now empty glass on the table. His brother raised an eyebrow at his actions. "Are you speaking in a metaphorical or literal context?" He asked and the younger of the two males scowled. "Literal." Agon spat.

He then scanned the room until his eyes landed on his wife who was talking to Mamori and Karin and his eyes zeroed in on what occupied her arms. Unsui followed his gaze and couldn't help the amusement from lacing his next words. "You're joking, right?" But Agon merely leveled him with a look. "Do I look like I'm fucking joking?" He asked rhetorically. "I'm sorry, but you'll need to elaborate because I fail to see how your infant son is a monster, Agon."

"Or are you saying that little Rennyo is doing the unspeakable by keeping you from getting your beauty sleep." Agon snorted at his brother's words. "Oh, I wish that was all the brat did." Unsui's face turned thoughtful at that. "Really, I've always thought that he was pretty behaved for an eighth month old baby." He commented and Agon scoffed. "He looks pretty behaved now, doesn't he? That's only because Sena's holding him."

"If anyone else holds him, he'll be fussy in a few minutes, and at home he's even worse. He whines when you try to put clothes on him, throws his baby food at my hair, takes hours to put to sleep, and when he's finally asleep the smallest things wake him up, and then it'll be back to trying to put him to sleep." Unsui blinked, not expecting the tirade. "But he's just a baby, Agon. It's hardly fair for you to call him a monster for those things; it's not like he knows what he's doing."

"That's what my wife said. But somehow I don't see that brat making things more difficult for her, the little mama's boy." He growled out as he grabbed another flute of champagne from the waiter's serving tray. "You're probably just imagining it." His brother offered, but Agon merely grunted. "No, I'm pretty sure he's trying to make me suffer. Do you know how many of my shirts he ruined in the last few months? Or how his new hobby is yanking my hair?"

Unsui refrained from commenting how his dreadlocks probably seemed like a plaything to his nephew. "I'm pretty sure that's still within the range of normality when it comes to infants. Your son is not out to get you, Agon." He said before sighing, and Agon said nothing for a few seconds. "If he isn't then why is he always interrupting my fun?" Agon eventually grumbled out. Unsui said nothing to that, but gestured for him to continue. "I don't know how he does it, but it's like the brat knows!"

"Knows? Knows what?" Unsui asked confusion etched on his face. "Obviously when we're about to have sex." He ground out. "Every single time, when things start getting hot and heavy he takes it as his cue to start bawling, and when the waterworks start, Sena literally goes running." Unsui blinked, before his mind fully processed what his younger brother said and he had to fight hard not to just burst out laughing. "S-So basically, y-you're upset that your c-child is cockblocking you."


The second time Karma came back for him is fifteen years later, and it happened while he was out getting groceries of all times. Now, it might seem weird that someone like Agon would do something as mundane as that. But when faced with a triple dose of puppy dog eyes courtesy of his wife and twin daughters, Shikishi and Shirome, he never stood a chance. The reason for the trip was to get supplies for his son's surprise birthday party.

Currently, the football superstar was holding a stick of butter on each hand. "So which do we need, the salted or unsalted one?" He asked his companion. "We need the salted one, papa. It won't taste as good otherwise." Shirome answered and Agon immediately put the butter they needed into their cart before returning the other one back from where he got it. "What else do we need to get?" He asked and the teen looked at the list that her mother had given her.

"Hmmm… After Shiki-chan gets back with the flour all that's left on the list is the chips for the nachos." She answered just as her sister came back with the flour which she carefully placed in the cart. "Ok the flour's done. Let's just get the chips so we can pay, and finally go home." Agon said, his impatience to get home showing, which caused his daughters to giggle since they were already used to their father being like this.

Make no mistake, it wasn't that he disliked spending time with his twins, but when he got a break from his job, he would much rather be sleeping in rather than be awoken before noon to go on a grocery run. He then quickly maneuvered through the aisles until he reached his destination- the chips section. It took less than a few seconds for him to locate the last thing on their list, and even less time to grab the chips and dump it in the cart.

After accomplishing that, he turned to the direction of his daughters, about to call them when he saw something that had immediately raised his hackles. There, standing a few meters away from his fourteen year old daughters was the bane of all fathers with teenage daughters- teenage boys. There were two male teenagers who were shamelessly ogling his daughters. Fortunately for him, his twins were too preoccupied with rechecking the items in the cart to notice them or how he quietly slipped away.

They say Buddha supposedly forgives you up to three times, but Agon was no Buddha, and he was never gladder for this until then as he walked up to the duo, his face in a horrible imitation of a smile. The color seemed to drain from his preys' faces when he stopped a mere arms length away. "Scram." One simple word, but it was more than enough to cause the two teens to scramble away as if their very lives depended on it, and it probably did.

Later that day as Agon was sitting down and talking to his wife about the incident earlier, she just listened to him patiently. But on the inside she was relieved that nothing bad happened, her husband hadn't sent someone to the hospital…again. As he talked about how he would crush any male who dared try to make a move on his two princesses, Sena couldn't help but think to herself that Karma was finally catching up to him.


The next time Karma struck, it had hit Agon hard and deep and the aftershocks would definitely be felt in the years to come. The cherry blossom incident as people would call it afterwards, took place during the Kongo family's yearly trip back to Japan. To be more specific during the cherry blossom viewing party that they had been invited to. The said party was being hosted by none other than the King of darken-err, Hiruma Yoichi, himself.

As there was no love lost between them, Agon was less than thrilled with having to go. But he couldn't disappoint the wife and kids, so he decided to suck it up and go with them. Of course, there was also Sena's promise for a nice time under the sheets for this, and the fact that he could keep guys away from his teenage daughters. So it was like killing three birds with one stone, and in Agon's standards that wasn't too shabby.

So there he was, under a particularly large cherry tree, sitting on a large blanket drinking some sake with his elder brother who had also been invited. As he looked around, he saw many familiar faces mingling with each other. It was just like the parties the blonde trash had thrown back in high school, but with more people this time since they brought their families here. There were also many faces he'd never seen before, and there were more brats around than before.

Speaking of brats, he scanned the crowds looking for one of his brats, but he grunted when he realized that he couldn't find him. "Hmm, what's wrong Agon?" His brother asked from where he sat beside him. "I can't see Kukai anywhere, which probably means I should go look for him." He said and Unsui merely nodded. "Should I help?" He offered, but Agon merely scoffed. "Please, my kid might have the worst sense of direction, but I can handle bringing him back by myself."

Unsui said nothing, but couldn't help thinking that while his nephew, Kukai, was a good kid, his sense of direction was severely lacking. It even came to the point that it was normal for him to get lost at least once on every outing if he was left unsupervised. Agon got up and began looking for his youngest when he saw his own nephew, Kongo Eisai playing with Shin Seiji and Yamato Tatsuya. "You three seen Kukai around?" He asked them, and while Eisai and Tatsuya shook their heads, Seiji nodded.

"I saw him playing tag with the other kids over there a while ago." He said before pointing to the side, where true enough there were a couple of kids chasing each other. Unfortunately, it seemed that Agon's search wasn't to end there as he found that his brat was not among the frolicking children. He nodded to Shin Seiji in thanks before going over to the other kids. Hopefully, one of them knew where his youngest child was or at least which direction he went. But as he got closer, something else caught his attention.

Behind the cherry blossom tree which the children used as their 'home base,' sitting down on a picnic blanket was his eldest son, Rennyo, with his arm around a girl. While he couldn't see her face from his angle, he could tell that the girl and his brat seemed to be getting real cozy. He entertained the thought of going over there and exercising his fatherly right to mess with him, but decided that he'd let it slide this one time. No one could say that Agon never did anything nice for his boy.

But as he took a step closer to where the children were playing, because he still needed to find his other boy, he caught movement from the direction of his son and the girl from the corner of his eyes. The two of them had stood up, apparently about to take a stroll. But at that point, Agon could have cared less, because now that they were standing he saw exactly who his son was with. "Fuck." There, in her black leather jacket, holding hands with his son was none other than Hiruma Minori.

Things went downhill from there as Hiruma Yoichi and his wife, Hiruma Mamori, just happened to stumble into the scene at that very moment. Mamori had given a small gasp when she saw them, surprise evident on her face. But her husband seemed to want to express more than his surprise at this turn of events, and didn't even hesitate in showing his displeasure by bringing out his guns from his sub-space pockets, clearly intending to make Rennyo into Swiss cheese, had it not been for him needing to dodge Agon's punch.

"What were you trying to do to my brat, trash?" He growled out as he stepped between Hiruma and his boy. "Isn't it obvious fucking Dreads,I was just performing my fucking parental duty of eliminating all fucking pests around my daughter." He replied as he aimed his guns at Agon. "Well too fucking bad, trash, no one gets to ruin my brat's life, but me!" With that no more words needed to be said as both men charged.

Soon other people noticed the sounds of fighting, and many who were originally trying to break the fight somehow got involved in it. Soon the cherry blossom viewing had turned into a massive battlefield with broken cherry blossom trees and injured people littering the clearing, and serving as proof of the carnage that had taken place. Hours later when the fight was finally over and people were getting medical treatment Agon found himself on the receiving end of his wife's glare.

"What? I stopped the trash from killing our brat." He said, and while she was still glaring, she seemed slightly less upset at his words. "But that doesn't mean it's okay for you and Hiruma-san to start World War III, Agon." She told him as she cleaned the injury on his arm. "Tch." Agon blamed the blond trash for this, despite him being just as guilty. It was to his grim satisfaction that when his eyes found Hiruma, he saw that he was being treated similarly by his own wife, and that there was a purpling bruise on him that had been caused by one of his punches.

But his attention returned to his wife when she spoke again. "Honestly, you two always take things to extremes. What would you have done if Rennyo, Minori-chan, or Mamori-nee got hurt when you started your war near them?" She said sternly, but instead of answering her question Agon merely looked at his wife. "Sena, did you know about Rennyo and Hiruma's brat being together?" He asked and Sena seemed to have been taken aback by the abrupt change in topic, but recovered and nodded. "He told me shortly before we came back to Japan."

"I think he wanted to tell you about it too, but he was probably worried about your reaction to it." Sena then sighed. "I know Hiruma-san and you aren't on the best... Well, usually you two aren't even on civil terms, but you can't keep doing things like this, if not for the sake of the general public, then do it for your son and Minori-chan. I mean, what will you do if in a few years from now, they're still together and they go up to you and tell you that they're getting married?"

At that point, Agon face paled and he suddenly felt nauseous. If, and that was a big if, that really did happen, if his boy married Hiruma's kid then technically they'd become family. He and the blonde trash would be some kind of in-laws. "I think I need to hurl."

But if there was any consolation for Agon that day, then it would be that during all the confusion that resulted from his and Hiruma's fight, someone had found Kukai, and brought him back to the clearing when everything had settled down.


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