Short drabble inspired by something that may or may not have actually happened to me once.
Dog Days Are Over
by hashtagartistlife
Sometimes, letting Lucy pick their jobs wasn't all bad. Sure, she had a tendency for avoiding all the 'fun' jobs (honestly, that girl had faced down the black mage Zeref and was now dating his younger brother and strongest demon; what part of 'subdue bandits' was she afraid of, exactly?), but lying on a deck chair and lazily petting the golden retriever curled up next to him, even Natsu had to admit that this job was by far one of the best he had been on. Whirlwind chases and fiery heroics were great, and all, but even immortal dragonslayer demons like him needed rest sometimes.
"Down, girl," he said idly to the other dog, who was jumping and whining to get his attention. He patted her head absentmindedly and focused on the feeling of the sun on his torso. Mmmmm, yes, if all of Lucy's jobs turned out to be something like this, he could definitely get used to them.
"I told you so," his girlfriend's voice carried across the yard to him, and Natsu looked up to see Lucy walking his way, a smug grin on her face. "You're enjoying this much more than beating up some smelly bandit gang in the middle of nowhere, aren't you?"
He sort of was, but hell would have to freeze over before he admitted that to her face. "Are you kidding me? I'm falling asleep over here, I'm so bored. And I don't even have Happy with me! How many more hours do we have left of this? I want to leave."
Seeing as how the job involved looking after two rather large dogs, Happy had understandably elected to stay back at the Fairy Tail building for this one. As a result, it was just Lucy and Natsu in the house, with Penny and Ella, the dogs they had been charged with taking care of. Lucy smiled fondly at the image of her boyfriend lounging with two dogs, and couldn't help but lean down to give him a kiss.
"Bored, hmm? Well, maybe I can change that," she murmured, but just as their lips were about to touch Penny jumped up in between them, apparently wanting to get in on the smooch-fest. She gave Natsu's face an enthusiastic lick, and Natsu jerked back with a surprised cry just as Lucy lost her balance and fell on top of him.
"Ah! Sorry! Sorry!" she said, trying to untangle herself from the mess of long blonde hair and Natsu and two dogs jumping all over them, when Natsu suddenly stilled as though an idea had occurred to him. He met Lucy's eyes, and a shite-eating grin spread slowly across his face.
"….. I'm up to my neck in bitches," he muttered, and Lucy stared for a split second, dumbfounded, before–
"…. oh my god," Lucy said, closing her eyes and rolling off her boyfriend, "oh my god. I can't even be mad at you for that. Oh my god."
By now, Natsu was laughing like a maniac, but Lucy was still sort of in shock. "… that was possibly the only situation in the world where that joke was acceptable. Oh my god."
"That's me, but you usually call me Natsu," he crowed, before collapsing in a fresh fit of laughter.
Lucy just buried her head in her hands and muttered 'oh my god' a few more times, wondering why the hell she had ever agreed to date this idiot.
