Well this is a story about troll romance. Simply how quadrants can look and how they work.

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Pairings:

Karkat diamonds Gamzee

Gamzee spades Dave

Karkat hearts Dave

Rose hearts Kanaya

Sollux hearts Aradia

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If you want some other pairings I gladly write them if that quadrant isn't filled by another character. For example you can't request Kanaya hearts Karkat but if it's as kismesis the pairing is fine.

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And now for warnings:

bulges and nooks, swearing, innocent creatures, HATE MATING, Karkats mouth, Dave being cool, Gamzee going on rampage, Sollux being miserable, Aradia being awkward and creepy, Equius sweating, Nepeeta being shipping crazy, Rose being uh Rose, John being a prankster, Jade being adorable etc.