"No, absolutely not. No way whatsoever. Not happening." Karkat shook his head violently from side to side, his dark as pitch hair swaying into his eyes with every movement. He wished passionately that a haircut would fix that, but he knew his hair better than anyone, and it did not take liking to being told what to do.

"Oh goodness Karkat, you are making this into a much bigger deal than it really is." The Maryam commented, crossing her thin arms over her delicate torso. "Besides, you used to ask me to set you up on blind dates all the time." As much as Kanaya had her point there, Karkat continued to shake his head, hardly wanting to allow counter thoughts to his standing statement into his mind.

"Yeah, that was before you tried, and I would like to point out tried, to set me up with that weirdass, dickwad of a fish boy who would never take his wet, creepy hands the fuck off of me." The small man huffed, baring his teeth in a half grimace half silent snarl. That Ampora douche had been the creepiest man Karkat had ever met, and he would like to keep it that way. Even after Karkat broke up with him, he stuck around and was constantly begging for some kind of special attention, which Karkat was very reluctant to give. After that, he was more than cautious about the people Kanaya wanted to set him up with.

"Fair point I must say, but this is someone I know. He is a friend. And I know he would treat you the flattering and appropriate amount of right as well as respect your personal space when you so desire." Kanaya's dark tinted lips turned up in a smile that, well on her looked almost false. The Maryam was someone so delicate and perfect looking, she appeared almost fake at times, with her full and healthy short dark hair, and her almost glowing pale skin. Every move she made was precise, and every word she spoke was carefully chosen, and spoken with a charismatic tug, making her very similar to her uncle, Karkat's older brother. Just far less annoying.

Currently, however, these charming words were swaying Karkat on his once firm choice. He wasn't sure he wanted to admit it, but he was interested. However, now that he had said no, he saw no way he could fall back on his answer without appearing as if he had truly been persuaded by his cousin. This was something both him and Kanaya recognized, however for the sake of Karkat's pride, the Virgo kept her lips shut on the matter.

"I... I don't know. This guy could still be a fucking creep. How do you know him, anyway?" The Vantas asked, looking up at Kanaya with a doubtful expression. Kanaya sighed and ran a hand over her hair to smooth it, something she did when she became frustrated, but would in no other way show the emotion.

"Terezi introduced us. She met him through work." Kanaya explained, however this only made the Cancer more anxious. Terezi, as they both knew, was an attorney who often made friends with her clients, which more often than not were weirdos who were on parole or needed to get out of their rape charges or something splendid like that.

Karkat felt even less swayed then before, and suddenly found he could hold even more sturdy ground now. He just shook his head, giving her a, 'Yeah as if' look. It was a look he gave the Maryam often. Kanaya grabbed Karkat's soft pale hand and held it up against her heart, pouting and leaning down so their gazes were level. "Come on Karkat. You and I both know full well that you want this date just as much as I want you to have it. Please, for your adoring cousin? Come on, you haven't anything to lose. As well, if something goes wrong you may message me and I will come and save you immediately." There it was, just like her uncle. However she drove a much more persuasive argument then Kankri ever could.

"Oh, fine! But if shit hits the fan its your fault, remember that."

Karkat let out a sigh as he pulled the blanket up around his waist, snuggling against the couch. His date was tomorrow, and currently, all he wanted was to consume his Pumpkin Spice Latte and watch Revenge Of The Bridesmaids for the thirteenth time that month. He had been dealing with Kanaya over whenever she was off her shift, and Autumn was always so busy at his work, he just needed some time alone to relax before he had to go out and meet some lame sucker who also couldn't get a date.

"Oh Karkles~!" Karkat groaned and let his head fall back on the couch, his grip on his latte tightening as he struggled to contain his annoyance. Of course Pyrope would show up just when he wanted to be alone. She strut into the apartment, which Karkat made a mental note to start locking, and stood in front of the television, hand on her hip and cane tapping at the Vantas' feet. She blinked her pale eyes, their gaze directed somewhere over Karkat's shoulder, although he knew she wasn't looking over there.

"Terezi, for fuck's sake, learn to knock on the goddamn door before barging in like you own the fucking place." Karkat grumbled, taking a sip of his latte and patting the spot beside him. "We're watching Revenge of The Bridesmaids." He said, trying to look past her at the screen. Terezi flipped her short ginger hair and flopped down on the couch, though she stuck her tongue out in Karkat's direction.

"You meanie, I'm not watching anything." She pointed out, throwing back her head to cackle at her attempt at humour. Karkat however did not find it very funny. For someone who was blind she sure did make a lot of rather offensive jokes about being blind. Something about her everyone who knew her never understood. "So," Karkat let out a growl of annoyance as he discovered she wasn't going to let him watch his movie. "A little birdy told me that you are going on a date with Strider tomorrow."

"That's his name? Great, he even sounds like an ex convict." The scrawny boy grumbled, taking another drink from his latte. The name was actually familiar, but he couldn't place his finger on where exactly he had heard it before. Probably on the news when he was put on trial for the murder he committed or something.

"Ex being the key here." Terezi cackled, grinning from ear to ear.

"Not funny, Pyrope. I don't want you guys setting me up with some dude who killed his little sister or some shit." Terezi sighed, resting back on the couch and staring, although not really, up at the ceiling.

"Calm down will you, I'm not going to tell you what he did, because that's his business, not yours. But believe me when I tell you it isn't really that bad, and that part of his life is over." Terezi didn't give Karkat a chance to reply however, as the moment she finished speaking she grabbed the remote, which Karkat had no idea how she knew was there as she couldn't exactly see it, and turned up the volume on the movie. Even if he couldn't get a retort in, he was thankful he could watch the movie now.

The dark haired boy did another once over of himself in the mirror, gazing at his outfit skeptically. He really wished Kanaya would let him pick out his own clothes when he went on dates, he'd be a lot more comfortable in his own sweaters. But no, just because she worked in fashion Karkat was forbidden to dress for himself.

For this date, she said due to the season, and the event, which was coffee downtown, he had to dress in the best suiting clothes for the atmosphere or some shit like that. He looked like a total hipster dork, with the smooth long sleeve V-neck shirt she had forced him into, and the ridiculous red scarf he wore around his neck, added with those stupid tight brown jeans and, alright somewhat fashionable, ankle boots, he could pass as full fledged hipster trash without having to go through any training. Well, what do you know, there was a bright side to everything.

"Karkat! You're going to be late!" Kanaya called from the couch in the living room. For some reason she had insisted on being there when he got ready. Sometimes, he swore, she acted more like a mother then his cousin.

"Kanaya, the shop is literally five fucking blocks away." Karkat called back, glaring at his stupid reflection before storming into the living room, his face tinting the red of his scarf.

Kanaya grinned widely as he entered, looking up from her book and studying the Vantas over. She seemed almost proud, if Karkat didn't think that notion was the most stupid thing he had ever heard he would have thought it were true. She was such a dork.

"Fantastic. You look lovely. If he doesn't just melt at the sight of you, once you two start talking he will surely be yours." She remarked, blowing a kiss at her cousin and offering a wide smile. Karkat didn't respond, instead he grabbed his keys and wallet, shoved them into his pocket, and marched out the apartment, hearing a faint, "Be safe!" as he slammed the door behind him.

It wasn't that far a walk, and once he arrived he suddenly realized he should have at least gotten a brief over of what this guy looked like so he wasn't looking around at everyone like a five year old idiot who had lost his mother in the grocery store. However, Kanaya must have filled the Strider guy in or whatever, and of course not her own family, because a hand was placed firmly on his shoulder and Karkat heard his name phrased as more a question than an actual statement. He spun around to see a man, several inches taller than himself, with the most blonde hair the Vantas had ever laid eyes on, dark aviators that seemed stupid to wear on a not so sunny day, and the biggest smirk he'd ever seen on another human being.

"Hey, I'm Dave. Kanaya's friend." He said, the tiniest slip of a southern accent dominating his speech. Alright, so the guy was pretty cute, at least Kanaya hadn't lied about that. But he was some ex criminal and he could easily be just was weird and obsessive as the last boyfriend Karkat had, so he wasn't quite prepared to show relief just yet.

"Karkat." Karkat said, offering his hand begrudgingly. Shaking hands wasn't something he was really into, and it was quite clear from the face he made as the other's hand clasped around his own. The blonde man smiled and pulled the smaller man's hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss to the back of his hand. Which, alright, wasn't the worst feeling in the world. In fact, it was kind of nice, and Karkat felt his cheeks heat up a little at the gesture.

"Cool to finally meet the famous Vantas, the cousin Kanaya never shuts up about. She warned me you would be cute, but I never expected you'd be this attractive." Dave said smoothly, flashing a cocky grin down at the shorter man. If Karkat's cheeks weren't pink before, they certainly were now. However he violently glanced outside the window, taking note of the doodles someone had drawn in the mist on the glass surface, hoping to whatever sick and twisted God was in charge of this universe that Dave Strider, the handsome and charming, southern boy before him, didn't notice the blood that rushed to his face.

With a sick feeling in his stomach, he realized, as he looked back to the pale and angelically built face of the blonde, he knew.

They took their seats at a small table in the far back corner, almost too small, it was poorly crammed between a bookshelf and the wall, with only space enough for the men to sit so close together their thighs touched. This didn't really bug Karkat, actually, the simple touch almost took his breath away, in a strange electric, jittery kind of way. Something about this boy caught him, like a fly trapped in the sticky prison that was the spider's web. The way he talked and laughed when Karkat told him how Kanaya had fawned over him before the date, the way he told stories of the crazy and wild things him and his friends had done in college, he was so… Enticing.

If one could get drunk off of another human, then Karkat Vantas would be overly intoxicated beyond the possible limits by this stranger.