REPOST: 1/22/2013
A/N: This story contains abuse scenes, situations of attempted rape, and the like. Don't read if you have an aversion to any of those. As a writer, it is not my wish to cause harm on my audience's psyche or cause discomfort, therefore I do advise you to heed my warnings now as opposed to later.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
"Dude, you're drooling," Emmett said.
Edward subconsciously reached up to wipe at his mouth. Upon finding nothing he turned to glare at Emmett, who had begun to laugh boisterously, attracting the attention of all the other students filing through Forks High's hallways.
Jasper punched Emmett. "Shut the fuck up, man," he whisper-yelled as he looked around in embarrassment, his face suddenly feeling warm.
Emmett straightened up, chuckling. "I can't help it. He's so fucking obsessed with her it's…it's…fucking hilarious." He succumbed once again to his amusement.
His guffaws echoed down the hallway where she was. She turned with a hint of a smile curling the corners of her mouth; her amusement was budding like a water lily in early summer morn as she observed her brother's antics.
Her eyebrows furrowed when she met Edward's unrelenting emerald orbs. They flashed with something she couldn't identify. But that wasn't anything new.
She looked away quickly when his gaze became so intense that it was like he was glaring at her for daring to look at him. Cheeks flushed red, she made her way to lunch.
"I'm not obsessed with her," Edward proclaimed with an irritated huff as he slammed his locker door shut. He peeked at Emmett's face, relieved to see that he wasn't offended.
Edward turned and walked towards the lunch room, leaving his friends to make idiots of themselves without him.
He glided through the hallways; people darted from his path so he could pass. The brooding look on his face told them that if he could, he would beat them to shit, especially if they didn't move fast enough.
It wasn't like he actually did anything to threaten his peers. He just looked completely pissed off at everything, all hours of the day. People went out of their way to stay away from him.
He sat down at his table after picking something to eat.
His sister always sat with her. Her pale face was lit up with one of her rare smiles. She almost never smiled, having no reason to.
Her life seemed to be falling apart around her. She was invariably on edge, at all times. She felt as if she had fallen down a rabbit hole. Her little blue dress – which frayed as her journey progressed – was but a symbol for her mind.
She was slowly losing herself. She could see it. Her brother could see it. Hell, even the lunch lady gave her an odd look earlier. She, however, had stopped caring. The one person who could actually make a difference to her, was hell bent on making her feel like she was worth less than the scum beneath his shoes.
She didn't know how wrong she was, however. She didn't know that the man who seemed to curse her very existence, the boy who was nothing more than a love struck adolescent with no clue as to how to manage such intense emotions, wanted nothing more than to be the source of her happiness.
She didn't know what seeing her salty tears cloud her eyes did to him. It made him absurdly angry is what it did. Anything or anyone that hurt her could not be guaranteed a long existence.
She didn't know at that very moment, he was thinking that she looked like those blown sugar sculptures that decorated the surfaces of fancy cakes – like she would dissolve into nothing, if you touched her.
She didn't know that he desperately wanted to know what horrible misdeed had been done upon her. She didn't know that she was his addiction, that she was everything…that she was it for him.
He fervently needed to learn all that there was to learn about her – her favorite color, her favorite flower. Fuck, even the kind of toothpaste she preferred would feed his infatuation.
But, what made him wish most ardently for the ability to read minds – besides his gut-wrenching wish to know anything and everything about her – was discovering the cause of her and her brother's sudden move to Forks. Knowing that would tell him the reason or reasons for her misery.
He, however, couldn't bring himself to invade her privacy by asking one of the readily available private investigators on his father's payroll to look into her past. He wanted to get to know her as a result of a progression of their relationship – preferably a romantic one – not as a result of him acting on his stalker like tendencies.
Jessica slid into the seat opposite him. She placed her elbows on the table and blinked at him.
He frowned before passing his lunch tray over to her. "Your dad?" he questioned, though he already knew that he was the reason she couldn't buy herself any lunch.
She merely shrugged. The movement was very nearly hidden by her bulky grey hoodie, but he was so accustomed to seeing her in the hideous thing that the little shrug didn't slip his notice.
He glared at her for not responding properly before reaching across the table and pushing her right sleeve up to her forearm. He swore, bringing his hand up to his face, and rubbing at it tiredly. There were bruises littering her arm – up and down – all in the shape of a large hand.
"And you didn't call me, because…?" he trailed off, annoyance easily heard in his voice.
She pulled her arm away from him, giving him a look that clearly told him to stop being an ass. His glare softened when she wiped at her reddening eyes.
"He took my phone," she said finally, her voice nothing more than a whisper.
His hands found his hair. He was really getting sick of her father. Edward wondered to himself why her father didn't realize that the more abusive he got, and the more times he got arrested, the less lenient the law would be on him. He wondered if Jessica's father didn't care or if he was really just that dense.
He watched her silently as she shoveled food into her mouth at a rate that would make even Emmett's jaw drop. "When the fuck did you last eat something?" he asked her angrily.
She paused her rabid chewing long enough to take a large gulp from Edward's lemonade bottle and give him an answer that had him seeing red.
Edward growled to himself as he pulled his phone from his pocket. "Where is he now?"
Jessica swallowed thickly, her gaze shifting from his face to the lunch tray. "I'm not sure," she lied.
"Jess," he said warningly.
She took a deep breath, understanding that her father was evil, grasping the fact that all he would ever do was hurt her and her mother, knowing the dangers of having him around, and yet hesitating because he was still, after all, her father.
She looked up at him, a watery smile on her lips. "That bar on Main," she said.
His phone was already out and pressed to his ear. Charlie assured him that he'd get someone to pick up Jessica's dad whiles he checked on her mom. It was disconcerting that her mother had yet to call him, especially considering the fact that her ex-husband was out of the house.
Not wanting to worry Jessica, Charlie told Edward not to tell her about his concerns about her mother. They hung up then.
Knowing Jessica a whole hell of a lot more than Charlie did, Edward asked, "How was your mom when you left for school this morning?"
Again, her eyes shifted from him to the lunch tray. "She was fine."
Edward leaned back in her seat, studying her. She peeked up at him through her lashes, looking to see whether or not his gaze was still upon her.
It was.
After several minutes, her face became red and she was distinctly uncomfortable with his staring. She let out a sigh that signified her surrender.
"Um. I went to check on mom this morning," she said, "but her door was locked." Her brow furrowed. "I started knocking, and then…he opened up." Jessica paused. "He told me to get out of the house, and to not come back." She swallowed thickly. "I called mom, but he…uh…he slapped me and yelled at me to leave."
Edward shook his head as he reached out and grabbed her hand again. His was so much larger than hers. And so was her father's. Edward couldn't wrap his mind around how someone so much stronger than someone else could hurt them.
"Finish your lunch," he said quietly.
She smiled at him again, that watery, uncertain smile that made him clench his fist around her fingers. She conceded easily to his wishes, and they continued speaking; their topic of discussion turned to lighter things until eventually, she was laughing and smiling, forgetting about her troubles.
She was suddenly waving at someone over Edward's shoulder. Edward looked back to see Bella give Jessica a timid answering wave. Her brown eyes flashed to his for a second before she lowered her head and turned away, letting her thick hair fall as a curtain between them.
He turned back to look at Jessica. "You're so mean," she said, disappointment coloring her voice.
Edward raised his eyebrows questioningly, wondering what his most recent offense was.
"She thinks you hate her," Jessica said, shaking her head.
Edward frowned. "I don't."
"I know you don't, but the way you look at her all the time," she shook her head, "…it's like you want to kill her or something."
'No,' Edward thought, 'I just want to do incredibly intimate things to her in every way imaginable, on every surface imaginable. On this lunch table, on our lab table in Biology, on my piano…especially on my piano. I also want to shower her with diamonds and flowers and buy her all the stars in the sky.'
Jessica gave him a strange look when he didn't answer. He turned his head to look at Bella, instead.
Jessica left him alone, knowing that he thought that Bella was way out of his league and that he would only ever get to admire her from afar.
Without Jessica's interference, he spent the rest of the lunch hour staring at her in such rapt attention it was a wonder his eyes didn't fall out of his head.
Bella could feel his intensity upon her flesh, burning into her, marking her as his. She didn't know who could possibly be looking at her in such a way. Observing the lunch room, she spotted several people looking in her direction, though she knew that that didn't mean that they were looking at her.
She wrote off Edward's stare, thinking to herself that he'd never look at her with anything other than irritation and that he was perhaps watching his sister.
But Michael – who insisted that she call him 'Mike' – was definitely looking at her, and it was definitely making her uncomfortable.
When the bell rang, Edward sprang from his seat, pulling his backpack onto his shoulders and holding Jessica's books under his arm. He strode to Biology, pulling Jessica by the elbow the entire way as he wanted to keep her in his sights. She still had his lunch tray with her and she was quickly scarfing down as much as she could.
Edward set Jessica's books down on her lab table before heading to his, where he dumped his belongings from his backpack on the table's shiny black surface. He always littered his books over the biology lab table even though he knew that when she arrived he would have to move them.
It gave him something to do…some reason to talk to her. He would always mumble a quick 'sorry' as he stacked his books up in front of him, ignoring the feeling of pathetic-ness that always followed.
He smelled her and reacted the same way he did every other time. He inhaled deeply. A low inaudible growl trembled through his body. She sat down beside him with a sigh, holding her books up so he could gather his own in a pile. She pressed her lips together. Her patience was thinning. He mumbled his apology as she put her books down.
He glared at her as always. His mind always ran rampant trying to find an explanation as to why she always smelled like sex, when in truth, everything about her screamed incorruptible innocence.
He shifted in discomfort as he felt a rush of blood to his groin. He looked down to see himself swelling in his jeans. He swallowed thickly and breathed deeply. Her scent was nearly torturous.
He was certain that if he were to ever actually have the opportunity to even touch his lips to her own, all of his carefully constructed walls – walls that were keeping him under control – would crumble to dust.
He wouldn't hesitate in showing her what she did to him. She drove him absolutely crazy, both with lust and a lingering irritation with her that for some reason never ceased to rear its head in her presence.
As payback for all the torture he had to do endure because of her – his constant desperate aches to grab her, pin her down, suck on her neck, stroke her cheekbones, kiss her forehead – he'd do ridiculously small things that he was certain would make her sob with impatience, arch in pleasure, and drive her to insanity. He wanted to suck the tips of her fingers into his mouth, lick her chin, kiss her ribcage, trace longing circles around her belly button –
He swallowed against the ache in his throat that pleaded with him to just take her again and again and again and again…until she couldn't breathe, until she was clinging to him with sweaty hands and eager whimpers.
He clenched his jaw and let his gaze drift down to the hollow at the base of her throat. He wanted to suck on that very spot. He wanted everyone to know that she was his.
He frowned. But she wasn't his. She probably never will be, he thought, as anxiety and longing filled him.
He knew that she thought he hated her. In reality, he was so in love with her that it very nearly tore him to shreds. He had realized his love for the tiny girl when he was sitting at home with only his thoughts as his company.
Edward searched his heart many times over for any sign of doubt in his revelation. Upon finding none, he could not deny his feelings for the heart wrenchingly beautiful girl that sat mere inches away from his arms, which were ready and waiting for her loving embrace.
The real beauty in her – the beauty that made her so completely and utterly irresistible to him – laid in her ability to be demure in nature, but feisty when provoked. She was incredibly intelligent if not a bit unobservant. Innocence lighted the air around her, and he felt almost lecherous for having the audacity to be in her presence.
Aside from her intelligence and the aura of purity around her, her physical beauty was undeniable.
Her eyes were indeed windows to her soul, swirling hypnotically, the color of cherry wood. Unbelievably long, thick, black lashes lined her nearly disproportionately large eyes, touching her soft cheeks with her every blink.
Her nose was small, perched regally on her heart-shaped face, which was framed by thick mahogany hair that flowed, curling all the way down to her thighs. A widows peak accentuated her prominent cheekbones and delicate chin. Deep rose red lips parted, letting out her honeyed breath, which he longed to taste.
This small, terrifyingly fragile girl owned his heart and could easily crush it with a flick of her wrist. That was not something he liked to dwell on.
The smell of someone's salty cologne invaded his senses and broke him out of his reverie. He fought the urge to pummel one Michael Newton as he sauntered over to their table. Edward knew that it wasn't so he could beg for tickets to the next basketball game.
"Hey, Bella," he said.
She sighed, annoyed. "Hi, Michael."
Edward watched as a tight smile formed on the Boy Wonder's lips. "I told you, Bella. Call me 'Mike'." His eyes darkened when she just looked at him.
She was extremely uncomfortable by his insistence about his name but not as discomforted as she was by the safety she suddenly felt with Edward sitting next to her.
The blond haired boy leaned over the lab table. Though he was invading Bella's personal space, she politely said nothing.
"You coming to my party on Saturday?" he asked.
"I don't think so…Mike," she said.
He smiled at her, pleased that she conceded to his wishes about his name, but slightly annoyed that she rejected his invitation. "Then we'll just have to meet up some other time," he said.
Edward narrowed his eyes at him and scoffed as quietly as he could.
"Got something to say, Cullen?" Mike asked.
Edward clenched his fists but said nothing and merely smirked at the oaf.
Bella – upset by Edward's hostility and not wanting a fight to erupt – leaned forwards towards Mike. "He doesn't," she insisted, casting a glare in Edward's direction.
Mike returned his attention to Bella. "Don't worry about him, Bella. If he gives you any problems, just tell me, and I'll set him straight," Mike said with an inappropriate amount of confidence.
Bella smiled at him placatingly. "I sure will, Mike."
Mike smirked again, before turning to go to his seat.
Bella turned to Edward. "What is your problem?" she questioned fiercely.
Edward raised an eyebrow at her. "I don't have one. Your boyfriend does," Edward spat, watching as she turned an interesting shade of red.
"He's not my boyfriend, Edward," she glared.
"Then tell him that."
She opened her mouth to say something scathing to him, but shut it quickly. He was unreasonably stubborn and she wasn't in the mood to verbally spar with him. "It's none of your business."
He smirked at her, "Being an attention whore is very unbecoming, Isabella."
She stared at him in disbelief. She blinked twice and clenched her jaw before turning forward in her seat. Her hair hid her abject horror as memories of that day flooded her mind. They bombarded her – harshly and unforgivingly – like raindrops on an ant hill.
The musky scent of male and sweat…Emmett's growl of disgust when he barged into her bedroom…the feel of the hardwood floor against her ribcage as she hid beneath Emmett's bed…her mother's voice coming from the living room downstairs…the hard sound of flesh meeting flesh, not once, but twice…Emmett's arms around her body, pulling her from her hiding place…the feeling of utter despair as they fled the sweltering heat of Phoenix…the feeling of all-encompassing safety as they entered the never ending overcast of Forks…
He sat back in his seat, angry with her for flaunting her relationship with fucking Newton in front of him.
Their teacher then wheeled in a TV strapped to a cart. The VCR player was older than Edward himself—he was sure of it.
Mr. Banner dimmed the lights and the beginning credits for a video on cell mitosis and meiosis swooshed onto the screen. It was hokey and had ridiculous graphic but it was one more free period he had, so who was he to complain?
Bella was leaning forward on her elbows, trying to drown herself in the video and ignore the arrogant brooding boy beside her. The memories had finally ceased, now all that was left were brief flashes and her tears.
She fiddled with her pencil, rolling it across the desk in front of her and letting the noise encompass her in her own little bubble.
He snarled in feigned annoyance and kicked the foot of her chair. "Fucking stop," he whispered harshly.
She turned, looking at him – her eyes watery and her face distressed – before returning her attention to the movie.
He stopped himself from saying anything else to her when her tears registered in his mind. He started wondering if he caused those.
It was a logical explanation but he was certain that he'd said much worse things to her. However, somehow, this time was different from all the rest. What he'd said – though without malicious intent – had caused her pain. He'd made her cry.
His heart thundered violently in his chest
Mr. Banner turned the lights on.
"Bella," he said, leaning forward.
She sighed, almost defeated, before turning to look at him. The sight of her face – covered in drying tears that were the result of something he did – had him reeling.
"Bella," he repeated, sighing. "I didn't mean – "
"It's fine, Edward," she said, cutting him off as she gathered her books. The bell rang seconds later and she was up and out of her seat.
Mike followed behind her eagerly and Edward sat back in his seat, thoroughly upset with himself.
A small hand appeared on the desk besides him. "Are you okay?" she questioned, concern flooding her features.
"Yeah," he replied, distantly.
She sat down in Bella's seat. "What happened?"
Edward ran a hand through his hair. "I said something really, fucking stupid."
Jessica smiled at him sadly. Standing up, she pulled Edward's seated form into her comforting embrace and placed a chaste kiss on his forehead. "It'll be okay," she promised, before leaving for her next class.
Edward sat there for a few more minutes. He heard the warning bell which told students that they had one minute to get to their class.
He put his head in his hands as the final bell rang, telling him that the next period had begun.
Mr. Banner walked in several minutes later, having left to retrieve some items from his office. He spent his free periods preparing for upcoming classes as he was not very social.
The tall, thin man made his way to his desk and then dropped a mess of loose paper and dog-eared books onto its already cluttered surface. "You okay there, Edward?" he asked.
Edward looked up at him, "Uh…yeah."
Mr. Banner gave him a smile. "You sure?"
Edward nodded, finally standing and packing his things away.
As Edward pulled the classroom's door open, he was stopped by the older man's voice. "You need a pass to your next class?" Mr. Banner was nothing if not kind. "I can write one up for you."
Edward shook his head in the negative and went on his way, until Mr. Banner stopped him again.
His teacher rounded his desk and leaned against it awkwardly. The man was definitely not accustomed to social interaction. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask," Mr. Banner said.
Edward turned and gave him a weak smile. "Thanks," he said before turning and leaving for the final time.
Maybe he wasn't as hated or feared as he'd thought.
OoO
Edward was late to his Spanish class. His teacher was forgiving yet stern as she scolded him. He sat down heavily besides Emmett. "Hey," Emmett greeted.
Edward nodded his greeting, still a little disturbed by what he'd done to Bella.
"Coach decided that we need to practice more…started ranting about rank," Emmett said.
Edward gave him a strange look.
Emmett shrugged, shaking his head, "I don't…."
Edward smiled at Emmett. "So, we gonna practice on our own then?
"Yeah, after school, on the court outside," Emmett continued.
Edward agreed to the impromptu basketball game before leaning back in his seat to complete the worksheet Mrs. Gogh had handed him.
OoO
His last class was Gym. As per his usual routine, he looked for Bella as soon as he entered the Gymnasium. She was standing on the sidelines – a flimsy netted racket twirling between her fingers – watching as Mike made a fool of himself on the court.
Near the end of the period, Edward paused to take a drink. Jessica, who had been keeping Bella company, made her way over to Edward.
Her face told him that she was upset.
"What's wrong?" he questioned.
"Mike won't leave us alone," Jessica said, unhappily.
Edward shook his head, "Just ignore him."
"I would be able to if he wasn't slobbering all over Bella like a God-damned lap dog."
Edward raised an eyebrow at her, "Jealous?"
Jessica looked offended. "Over that?" she pointed to Mike, who was falling all over the place trying to hit the little birdie. "As if, Edward," she sneered in Mike's direction. "He's as annoying as an ingrown pubic hair."
Edward choked and sputtered out his water. His face was red when he eventually calmed down. He raised his eyebrows at her. "That's disgusting."
She smiled at him cheekily before she snatched the water out of his hands. After taking a sip she said, "I hope you plan on apologizing to her."
Edward's eyes snapped away from Bella's face. "I did…sort of."
Jessica raised an eyebrow at him. "Do it properly, Edward," she urged. "I've never seen her so upset by something you said." Edward looked down ashamedly. "What did you say to her?" Jessica pondered.
Edward shrugged. "It's not as if it's the worst thing I've ever said to her." Jessica blinked at him. "I called her an attention whore."
Jessica's jaw dropped. "You did what?"
Edward shrugged. "I've said meaner things, Jess."
"I know that, Edward," Jessica sighed, shaking her head at him. "If you want her to like you, you have to stop being so terrible."
"I didn't hurt her on purpose."
"Well, what did you expect would happen when you said that to her?"
"I didn't think about that."
Jessica observed the boy before her. He was always in control. He was always thinking five steps ahead. "She's gotten to you, hasn't she?" Jessica questioned, though it came out sounding more like a statement.
Edward struggled with himself. Admitting to her how Bella completely and utterly threw him off was not something he was ready to do. It felt to him as if it would be harder to stay away from her if he acknowledged what a mess Bella made him.
Jessica rubbed his bicep comfortingly. "It's okay," she said, sensing his inner battle. "You don't have to tell me."
Edward smiled down at his best friend, wondering how she had escaped his notice for so long. They had only been friends since his junior year, where a night of drunken fumbling's, lost virginities, and horrifying discoveries led to their friendship. It was as if they were bound, permanently, to each other.
Sometimes, Edward hated the fact that they were not romantically compatible. He'd held her before. She'd cried on his shoulder. Hell, when she stayed the night at his house, she slept in his bed with him.
But all those times…nothing felt right. Jessica knew it, too. His arms didn't feel like home to her. Their bodies didn't fit together like they were made for each other. They were like two mismatched puzzle pieces in that regard.
But it was not something Edward could change. They were both meant for different people. Though he loved Jessica, and she loved him in return, a relationship between them would be one of convenience borne from their already easy friendship. It wouldn't be a passionate romance that lasted decades. It would be short and bittersweet and perhaps it would even destroy their friendship.
The period ended and Edward sent Jessica on her way.
Again, in accordance to his usual routine, Edward looked for a small girl with big, brown eyes. He frowned.
Bella was gone.
OoO
It was already dark outside. The evil desperate sounds of the night seemed to be closing in on her.
She had stayed late at school since her father had the night shift and Emmett was playing basketball with his team. Annoyed and tired, she decided to leave since Emmett was taking too long.
She walked to her truck and fished her keys out of her bag. When she threw her bag into the car, something caught her eye. She leaned down and looked at her front left tire. With an exclamation of disbelief, she backed away from it and circled her car, taking a look at all of her tires.
She pulled her cell phone from her pocket with shaking fingers. It fell due to her uneasiness. She bent down and searched the ground blindly for it. She was certain she heard something crack when it fell.
Her fingers brushed against it when she reached under her truck. Tugging it towards herself with her fingernails, she let out a noise of victory.
It was, however, short lived because she then discovered that the battery had fallen out, the screen had a huge crack across it and the keyboard was loose.
She sighed, knowing there was no use in crying, and then decided to go back into the school and either find Emmett or call her father to pick her up.
She spun around and gasped loudly, clutching her chest in surprise. She breathed deeply and glared at Emmett.
"Emmett, what the hell?"
He grinned at her, his dimples quickly melting her anxiety. "You going home now? I'll race you."
"Well, I was going home but…." Bella pushed the truck door to the side to reveal the slashes in her front left tired. "They've all been slashed," she explained.
His brow furrowed. "Get your stuff out. I'll drive you."
She sighed and climbed into the cab of the truck to grab her bag. She slipped out and slung it over her shoulder before folding her arms over her chest. Emmett closed the cab door and wrapped a large arm around her shoulders.
He heard a soft rustling in the bushes. His head turned to look, only to see something retreating back into the forest. His jaw was set as he led her to his old jeep. He quickly glanced through the window to make sure no one was in the backseat before helping her into the passenger side. He quickly jogged to the driver's side before jumping in and speeding off with only one thought running through his mind.
Something is hunting Bella.
A/N: Should I continue?
