Author's Note: Greetings! Thank You for clicking/choosing the link that went to this story. Am Very Grateful but Very Lazy to type out the words. Sigh. Spent too many nights just thinking of this story but I had to wait for my account to fully register. Well, because I am so lazy to type now... On With the Disclaimer!

Disclaimer: D GrayMan is not owned by the writer of this fic, instead, it is owned by the owner, Katsura Hoshino. Thank You for Understanding (Bows Politely)

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Chapter 1: A Bad Day

Allen Walker was having one of those bad days again. No. Not 'those bad days' but 'those possibly horrible and unimaginable bad days'. The difference? Well, maybe it was the possible fact that he, along with his group went to some unknown uninhabited location in search for Innocence but it was nothing but a trap set up by two of the most infamous and clever Noahs they have faced...Aside from the Millennium Earl.

And the catch is...Allen Walker had to rescue an unconscious Lavi from the solid transparent box that Road had created. His only partner was the one he couldn't stand even for a mere 5 seconds just to save their dearest ( Well mostly on Allen's part) friend.

" Tch, stop wasting my time and get the fucking hell down from the ceiling so we can fucking kill you already, you bitches!" Oh and did I forget to mention that their enemies were floating above them while Allen and the unexceptionably irratable Kanda were chained together by Road's dream chain and they were surrounded by a horde of Tease waiting for their Masters' beck and call?

" Damn it, stop shouting you Idiot Bakanda! You're only making the situation worse." As if scolding his partner would make any difference to the current situation.

" Shut the Hell Up, Moyashi. As if working with the likes of You would make a difference." the raven haired man spat at his counterpart. They would never learn to work together even if the life of a comrade would come between them, will they?

" Now, now, Exorcists. Both of you Calm down, will ya? We're your enemies remember? Us." as if they needed the Noah of Pleasure to remind the both of them.

" Tyki!Tyki! Can we play with them some more?" the older of the two siblings ranted to the one beside her. Snickering whilst her murderous gaze befell on the two unfortunate victims.

" Well, we do have some time before that, don't we Road?" the dark skinned man nodded in agreement as he snapped his hands and objects began appearing before the exorcists.

' What the hell are they planning?' both Allen and Kanda thought as the rules of the game were set before them.

" Both of you must do something for us if you ever want to rescue this boy. Got it?" The victims threw hesitated glances at each other before answering back the obvious reply.

" If that's what it takes to rescue Lavi!" Allen replied for the sake of the team.

And then, the two Noahs smirked at the pair as they began to play the game...

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The 15 year-old exorcist awoke from his slumber to find himself leaning on the large glass window of the train they boarded. That dream, it was a recollection of what happened on their current mission. Or at least, their failed mission.

They didn't get the Innocence. Their Finder was killed by Akuma. Their Anti-Akuma weapons were falling apart. They met two Noahs. They were tricked and played around by them. Allen sighed;That was a harsh blow on Allen's Pride...

" You're finally awake, Moyashi. I could hardly sleep a wink with your damn snoring inside this tight compartment." and along came curses that his partner muttered with that statement.

" Shut Up, Bakanda. Maybe it was You who was snoring out so loud and not me." the white haired boy retaliated.

And worse yet, he had to face a pissed off exorcist named Bakanda.

" As if that kind of snore could come out of my nostrils. You're dreaming." the man snorted, folding his arms in front of his chest in preparation of a well deserved sleep.

Allen sighed. "Whatever, Idiot—" and he was cut off from his insult when the cabin door abruptly opened to a more than energized rescued partner.

" Allen-chan! Yu-chan! Ya missed me?" came the voice of the benevolent warrior. But no response came, only two loud, tired and grumpy snorts. " What the hell's wrong with you people? Do you need me to make a few puns to get a laugh outta ya?"

"..." the silence between the team grew only colder.

" Brr...Am I freezing or is it that I'm just getting the cold shoulder here?" yes, and he did make a lousy joke just as he said he would.

" Idiot Usagi. Can't you fucking see that I want to rest? Rest my fricking eyes from seeing Your sorry butt!" the Japanese man cursed at the being who was currently smiling away at the death glares he was sentenced to.

" Aaww, but it was you're fricking eyes along with your body that came and rescued my sorry butt." he teased his equal. "And I didn't forget ya too Moyashi-chan!" he quickly added, much to the aggravation of the man planning on squeezing the life out of him.

" Yu-chan, Moyashi-chan, do ya both need to go to your special happy place?"

" Stop calling me by that name!"And a blood vessel erupted from the Japanese man as he unleashed his damaged sword on the victim also vandalizing the place with his tyranny.

" Y—Yeah, sure Lavi. Just keep fantasizing that." Allen sighed at the two energized people in front of him. The view of the dark and large structure was approaching them. That was their home where they would return to in a few short minutes. He wondered how he would report this to the Supervisor...unless, he didn't have to report it completely to them.

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The Dark Order Headquarters had the usual gloom and sad atmosphere it contained like it's predecessor. It's lamenting environment cannot be taken away because of the fact that there were personnel like Finders and fellow exorcists being killed at a daily basis. But this has been Allen Walkers' home, since the day he first arrived at this said Organization.

" Allen, Kanda, Lavi, welcome back. You done with your mission already?" Science department chief Reever greeted the odd trio while carrying a large stack of papers undoubtedly for Komui. "That was quick."

" It's good to be back Reever-san!" Lavi chirped.

"Tch." Kanda tched.

" Yeah, you can say that since it was a failure." and Allen nodded.

" That's okay. There're a lot more opportunities for that. Just keep trying." cheered the obviously tired Reever. Had he gotten his daily 2-3 hours of sleep yet? "Well, you three better report to Komui before he sleeps again, just got this signed after an hour of nagging him to wake up. See ya."

Two out of the three exorcists bid him goodbye before entering the sleeping scientist's den, report files at hand.

" Hey Bakanda." whispered the shorter of the trio. " Did you seriously write that in your report?"

Dark blue eyes gazed at the shorter boy beside him and snorted. "As if I'd fucking tell that to the worst possible understanding person here."

Allen regained his composure after giving off a sigh of relief. He didn't need to redo his report since Kanda, for the first time in their entire life working together, agreed with not telling the older personnel the truth. And he was sure that Lavi was knocked out unconscious during that whole period of time so his report would be lacking.

" Leenalee...my precious..." they were a little over a minute too late since the Supervisor had already fallen asleep and blissfully snoring and rasping for his sister.

"...My Precious..." it sounded like Komui was ready to rape said sister.

The trio shivered, glancing at each other and guessing who would approach the snoring beast with the words that would certainly wake him to reality.

'Fucking Hell No.' Glared the samurai boy.

'I did it last time.' Pleaded the youngest of the trio.

'Crap, I don't have an excuse to match theirs' Lavi eyed the two in defeat. At least he'll finish his turn after this. He dragged his lazy body towards the Supervisor, rasping the words that would bring him to the brink of death.

" Komui, Leenalee is two-timing both Allen and Yu-chan." and the two left overs twitched at that statement.

" LeeNaaLee!!!!" bellowed the man with the extreme case of sister complex. A light tap on the shoulder greeted the scientist.

" Glad ya've come down to Earth, Supervisor." Lavi gave off a grin.

" Here."Idiot Lavi why'd you give off that excuse!-Allen

"Tch. Here."...(You don't want to know what he's thinking about the Rabbit)-Kanda

" Here ya go."Damn, I can feel their glares already. It wasn't THAT much, anyways.-Lavi

Three large file folders were sent unto the Supervisor's table as they hurriedly strode their way towards the door.

" Wait!" commanded the commander, large drilling equipment at hand. "You thought I forgot about you're regular check-up?" Damn those eerie perceptions that scientists had for their projects...

A few minutes passed and along went three pale looking exorcists, two without weapons and another with his arm bandaged like a three thousand year old mummy. They groggily went towards the cafeteria as they have yet to eat their dinner. They let the fact that they had the opportunity to comment the miserably tired face of the other since they were hungry like there was no tomorrow.

Strangely enough, they found themselves seated in one secluded table (thanks to the death glares Kanda threw to the other people). One had the regular soba, the other Meal Set B and the last one, all of the available. Silence was all but frantic on that table since they were tired and a bit depressed at the failure of the last mission.

" So, what do ya think they were plannin'...I mean those Noah people anyways." Lavi started up a conversation.

Allen continued to drown Lavi's start of a conversation with his mouth full of food that made up Meal Sets A through C. He didn't want to discuss that with Lavi...It was too much for him right now but then he wondered what Kanda, that easy-to-irritate exorcist, would say...

" What the fuck do you want, Rabbit?" he glared daggers at the person across the table. "Can't you leave me and my soba alone in peace?"

No of course not, if you were talking to Lavi. " But Yuu-chaan! I was out cold during that epic battle. I came in to only when you and Moyashi-chan rescued me." his voice was loud enough for the next three rows to hear him. Didn't he have the dignity to shut up especially when it was about him playing damsel in distress?

Kanda stopped himself from slurping his soba noodles and raised the chopstick he used on the level of the Rabbit. "See this chopstick?" he questioned. "Watch me stick this up your ass, through your spinal column and into you BRAIN!"

Immediately, Allen tried his hardest to pull away the two bickering pair. He regretted having to seat with these two. Wait a minute, why was he spending so much quality time with these two anyway? I mean, Lavi would be okay but Kanda? Kanda had much better things to do than stay with the likes of these two.

" I'll fork you good with you own fork you son of a bitch!"

" Argh, Yu-chan! Stop harassing your friend. Try Allen for a change would ya?"

" As if that BeanSprout would come close to my pissed off level that I would just stick a chopstick up his nose. No. It would take more than that to make him suffer."

The insulted one didn't know whether that was an insult or a complement as he gulped down his tea which strangely tasted a little different. Was it spiked? Allen couldn't help but think but loosely shove it away as he began to pummel the oppressor. " What the hell do you mean by that, Bakanda!"

And so began a trio that always fought as if nothing changed; people began to place bets on who would get their clothes stripped first on their cat fight. Most bets were on Lavi.

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Allen and Kanda were damned tired from their cat fight a while ago but then Lavi was energetic as usual. The pair were sick with something that they could not process. What the hell was wrong with their body? Was it something they ate? But Jerry cooked the usual food they ordered and they suspected that he would never hold a grudge against either of the two.

" Woohoo! That was a hell of a lot o' fun ain't it Allen-chan, Yu-chan?" ugh, why was that Baka Usagi so high right now?

They were on their way back to their individual dorms. Grateful for the rest that their body would receive later that night...

" Well, this is my stop. Thanks for the company Allen-chan, Yu-chan. !" Lavi bid his friends a goodnight kiss that totally creeped them out. If it weren't for the pain occurring on both of them, they would smack some sense onto that boy by now.

And now the only problem confronting their bodies from getting sleep was each other.

" Tch, I hate the fact that my room is in the same hall as yours, shorty." Kanda's breathing was heavy.

" Shut up will ya. If it wasn't for the fact that the Order was busy recruiting new Finders, I would really REALLY want to switch rooms with another." Allen heaved heavily. "And what was that comment about my capacity of reaching your pissed off level? Was that—that an insult or a complement?"

" It—It means that every time you reach my pissed off level, which is every time I see your contorted face, I'd rather—rather do something worse than what I'd do to the Rabbit." Kanda ventilated, it was getting harder for him to converse let alone think of a torture as cruel as what he wanted to do on the Rabbit.

" Pfft, if you'd get me into my pissed off level, I'd dye that dry-looking sassy hair of yours pink."

" The hell do YOU know about torturing other people? Is that all that your bean sized brain could think of?" his walking was slightly crippled now. " And what the hell would You know about my hair? Don't you know how long it takes to keep this hair moisturized?!"

Okay, that was a girly comment Kanda said...Maybe it was something he ate then. He'd have to talk to Jerry tomorrow, personally.

" Heh, if I were you...I'd put less conditioner and more shampoo." Allen huffed, slowing his walking speed equal to his companion.

" So says the shorty with whitish, dry, brittle, UGLY hair." Kanda retorted. " Just look at you with your lousy appearance! Even if you regularly did your personal training schedule, you'll never reach the peak of perfection in body and mind."

" You—Do you mean to say that I need to do those mental yoga training you put yourself into? That just puts on fat on your thighs whenever you sit down and do nothing!" Allen continued his ranting. " If I were you, I'd rather train my whole body than let my ass do all the training."

" Tch, if I were you, I'd increase my mental capacity so that I wouldn't look so stupid all the time with that idiotic grin." and the argument on who would be a better 'Kanda' and a better 'Allen' continued until they reached Allen's door. (Kanda's was just a few rooms after his)

" Finally Salvation!" Allen praised the Lord that he had somehow reached his much awaited pain had already become unbearable as it surged through both exorcists' body. So, without further hesitation Allen closed the door with him inside sending a last momentary glare at his companion. "I'd make a better 'Kanda' than you'll ever be, Bakanda!" and he closed the door before he could hear the latter snort.

" You Wish!"

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Peace at last finally came to the young exorcist. He actually wondered how they had come to a conversation about who would become the better counterpart than the other. It disgusted Allen. Allen be like Kanda for the day with all that snorting, annoying, rude personality he contained?

Pfft. No Way In Hell.

But then again, he wondered to himself. If he did have a chance to be Kanda (which would never ever happen because this was reality and that would only happen in stories written by weird people) ,even for just a day, he would totally do a total personality make-over with him. And he wouldn't mind doing something with that longish, snake-like hair of his that seemed to whip through the air every time he would pass by.

" Yaawn~but I like the way his hair smells." for a second, his pain evaporated as he quickly changed his clothes to pajamas. God, he was tired. He forced himself to take a few more steps to his seemingly comfortable single bed. At last...Relaxation...

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Allen woke up to the tune of his inner alarm clock system telling him it was an hour before dawn. He still felt tired as he urged his body to move out of bed. He felt odd and heavy as he walked around to the nearby towel rack. Eew, he could feel dry drool lopside on his mouth. His rough mouth.

Wait, he felt his chin again. He had a 4 o'clock shadow.

'No way! I'm finally hitting puberty!' he chirped inside his mind as he raced to the nearby wallmirror.

Blue eyes widened at the figure before him.

Long elegant dark blue hair. A naked tanned upper body attached to a short black boxer shorts at the bottom half...

Dear Mother of God...Why the Hell do I look like Kanda!

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Author's Note: And so ends the first Chapter...Do You Like It? Well, if you ahve any questions pertaining to the story, please do not hesitate to ask. I would sincerely like it if you were to REVIEW, also. And now, I am lazy to write, Forgive me.

Also, a small warning about my writing things...is found in my profile... Okay, too tired to think...

( Does Ninja Handsigns, throws smokebomb) SARABA! *VOOOOSSSSHHHH*