The curtain goes up, revealing the Loud House living room. Lincoln walks in and looks to the readers.
"So, you're never gonna believe me. No one in their right mind could ever possibly believe me. But what I'm about to tell you is true. 100% true. So, it all started the day before my sister Lori got married."
"Lincoln!," a female voice calls from another room, but he ignores it for now.
"The day that I had? I'm talking mind-bending."
"Lincoln."
"Bananas."
"Lincoln."
"Absolutely- -"
"Lincoln."
"What?"
He turned his head and saw Lori standing next to him.
"Hey Linc!"
Lincoln turned to the readers, "This is Lori," he turned back to Lori, "I'm in the middle of a story here."
"I know. I'm being supportive."
"Lori!"
"Fine! I'm going," she walked out of the room.
Music started playing in the background as Lincoln turned back to the readers.
Just one day, that's all I need
Just a day without her nagging
Just one day, I beg, I plead
But the drag just keeps on dragging
While I wish for just one Monday or a Friday to be free
Free to read and play and party and be messy and be me
All I ask is for twelve hours to live my life my way
Just one simple, awesome, crazy, kickass day
Lincoln frowned as he watched Lori work in the kitchen.
One more day, she's on my back
She's been riding me forever
On my faults and all I lack
And all I, oh whatever
'Cause I'm lazy and I'm average and I'm sloppy for a start
And I know she'd like a brother who was handsome, cool and smart
And I know she's frickin' perfect, but I'll never be that way
Not for a single, solitary day
Lincoln walked off, and Lori walked in with a clipboard and faced the readers.
Tomorrow is the wedding and tonight is the rehearsal
And there is no room for error, I mean not one flaw
We've got guests in just ten hours
Fix the tables, trim the flowers
I want beauty and perfection
I want total awe
Leni walked in with a magazine in her hands. She held it up for everyone to see.
And with Weddings Magazine here for a feature on the scene here
The business is depending on this one success
Lori put a hand on Leni's shoulder.
Now breath, but thank you, Leni
And in fact, that is the story
So get moving, move this produce and remove this mess
Leni ran off and quickly got to work.
Lori turned back to the readers and smiled.
Just one day is all I want
With my family united
Fears at bay
No fights, no taunts
Just the twelve of us delighted
I mean look, I love my sibs, I love my work, I love my life
And I love my fiancé and in a day, I'll be his wife
And I'll throw the perfect wedding and I'll throw the bride's bouquet
And we'll have one happy, loving, family day
Lincoln was trying to eat breakfast, but Luan kept using Mr. Coconuts to mimic everything he said.
"Lori, Luan is puppeting me again!"
Lori glanced at him and frowned as she turned back to the readers.
One more day, he'll fight and fuss
When his joy is all I'm after
It's been a long tough time for us
Now it's time to hear some laughter
'Cause I only want him happy and well, punctual and clean
But he mumbles and he grumbles every time he speaks with me
He's bright and so in cycle, but those traits aren't on display
Well, not lately, often, ever
Not today
Lori walked back into the kitchen, and Lincoln quickly turned to the readers.
"Ok, really fast. Tonight is The Hunt. It's an epic scavenger hunt and, I really wanna win. There's just one issue..."
Just one day, that's all I seek
And I have been asking nicely
Just one day, it's not a week
It's a night to speak precisely
And The Hunt is not a stunt, it's my one shot at fame
To be someone who is something, not just what's-his-name?
If I'm in it, I can win it
If she'd only say ok
We'd be off and running, gunning for one fun and perfect day
Lincoln goes to ask Lori, but she's busy talking to several other people.
"Lori? Lori? LORI!"
Lori turned to Lincoln and put her hand up.
Listen kid, it's not the time
No, that apron is a crime
And that sea bass isn't fresh, it's three days dead
Lincoln closed his eyes and put his hands behind his back.
Lori, I really need to know if I can- -
He opened his eyes and saw that Lori had walked away.
Wait, now where'd she go?
God, I'll never draw her focus from the bread
Several people start singing over each other. After a while, they get to the end of the song.
For one...
Stressful!
Perfect!
Busy!
Winning!
Anxious!
Stellar!
Hig-stakes!
Kickass!
Do or die...
Crazy day!
