AN: I know a lot of people have already done similar things to this, but it was really therapeutic for me to write it. I figured I would post it for you all in the hopes that it would be just as therapeutic to read. Enjoy!
"You were right, Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving," Lexa said.
Clarke could not stop the tears from pouring down her cheeks. She wanted to smile at the fact that Lexa remembered the words she'd said what felt like a lifetime ago, but she couldn't because the realization of the truth in those words had cost Lexa her life. She could see the life fading fast from Lexa's eyes, and she knew the brunette would not be with her for much longer. She had heard the Traveler's Blessing all her life, and if anyone deserved it, it was Lexa. Clarke had never had to say it before, and she wished she didn't have to today.
"In peace, may you leave this shore. In love, may you find the next. Safe passage on your travels until our final journey on the ground. May we meet again," Clarke said through her tears.
She quickly leaned in to kiss Lexa one more time. She felt Lexa's lips tug weakly against hers for a second before they went slack beneath her, and she knew the girl she loved was gone. She pulled back and started sobbing as she closed the commander's lifeless green eyes. She'd never see those eyes staring at her lovingly again. She thought Lexa would live forever, that Lexa would always be by her side, but now she was gone, and Clarke didn't know what to do. What if, someday, she forgot what Lexa looked like? What if she forgot the sound of the brunette's voice, the beautiful way she said Clarke's name? Clarke just wanted to curl up in the bed beside Lexa and die, but Titus pulled her away all too soon.
Clarke woke with a start, sitting up in the bed and taking in her surroundings. A cluster of flickering candles in the corner of the room gave off a soft orange glow. She realized that she was not in her room, but in Lexa's. Had she been sleeping in here ever since Lexa died? Or was it…? Dare she hope? Clarke was hesitant to look, but she turned her head to her left anyway and immediately breathed out a sigh of relief. Lexa was lying beside her. Clarke reached out to touch Lexa's tattooed arm. Still warm. She was still alive.
"Clarke?" Lexa's sleep-filled voice sounded beside her.
"Lexa," Clarke choked back a sob.
Lexa immediately sat up, turning to face Clarke with worried green eyes, not even bothering to hold the sheet up to cover her bare chest.
"What's wrong, Clarke? Are you hurt?" Lexa asked.
Clarke shook her head as she continued to cry, and understanding dawned on Lexa's face. Lexa held out her arms to Clarke, and the blonde collapsed against her, crying into her chest.
"You had a nightmare," Lexa stated.
Clarke nodded as she continued to sob, and Lexa soothingly rubbed her back, humming a comforting tune in her ear. Clarke felt Lexa's warm skin growing moist beneath her cheek as Clarke's tears began to trail down her chest. Clarke knew she should stop crying, that Lexa was alive and well, but she couldn't shake the feeling of despair she had felt in her dreams. She had been so scared that Lexa was really gone forever, and she hoped that she would never have to feel that way again. She tried to stop focusing on her raging thoughts and focus on the warmth of the girl that she was clinging to so desperately. Clarke's tears gradually stopped as she was calmed by the steady beat of Lexa's heart against her ear. Lexa stopped humming when she sensed that Clarke was calming down.
"Do you want to tell me what your dream was about?" Lexa asked softly.
"You. You were dead. Titus was trying to shoot me because he thought you would never be able to execute your duty while I was alive, but you came into the room, and he accidentally shot you instead. I tried to save you, but there was nothing I could do. You died right in front of me," Clarke said, tears slipping from her eyes again.
"Shh, it's alright," Lexa murmured in Clarke's ear, "I'm not dead. I'm right here."
Clarke nodded and sniffled, holding Lexa tighter.
"But, Clarke, before we take this any further, I want you to know that I am the commander, and my job is a dangerous one. I could die at any moment, maybe long before you're ready to say goodbye," Lexa warned her.
Clarke pulled back to look Lexa in the eyes. "I know, Lexa. That doesn't mean I don't want to be with you. I don't care if you could die tomorrow. That doesn't change the fact that I want you. I don't want to keep running from my feelings anymore. Ai hod yu in, Leksa."
"I love you too, Clarke," Lexa said with a wide grin, the kind of grin Clarke had seen earlier that day when they slept together for the first time.
"I understand that you could die. Just not too soon, okay?" Clarke said with a smile of her own.
"Hopefully not anytime soon," Lexa agreed.
Clarke stared into Lexa's loving green eyes and was beyond relieved that she got to see them again after what had happened in her nightmare and the hopelessness she had felt. Clarke would've loved to stay up all night looking into Lexa's eyes, but all too soon, Lexa moved to lie down again, still facing Clarke.
"You should get some rest," she said, "You are to meet Octavia at the barricade tomorrow."
Clarke nodded and lied down beside Lexa, wrapping her arms around Lexa's waist and pulling her as close as she could, tangling their legs together.
"Of course," she said, burying her face in the brunette's chest, "Thank you."
Lexa's only response was a light kiss pressed to the top of Clarke's head. Clarke let out a delighted hum and allowed the steady beat of Lexa's heart to lull her back to sleep.
AN: For anyone wondering, the tune I imagined Lexa humming was the Clexa theme that they use in the show. Thank you for reading, and I hope you liked the story!
