Just a little oneshot of how I could imagen Tony and Ziva getting together :)

Disclamer: I own nothing!

Enjoy


She was growing distant. It had begun last week when they heard about the new intel from Interpol on Ilan Bodnar. Unluckily it had been a dead end; he was too good at leaving no trails behind. But he had seen the look on Ziva's face when McGee told them about the technique Bodnar had used to cover his trails.

Something had clicked inside her head; she had after all been Mossad; and along the lines of what Gibbs' rule said; there was no such thing as en ex-Mossad officer. Since that day Ziva had been very secretive closing whatever she was doing on her computer down when someone walked by, when they were doing deskwork.

One day he had sneaked up behind her. He only got to read a sentence before she found out and the same second she closed the fan. But it was enough for him to know; something was up.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he approached his own desk, not wanting to pressure her as he was scared she would shut completely down. It did not work as the tone of his voice had come out serious even though he was trying to make it sound like he was just joking around; she new he was sniffing.

She turned around pretending she had to reach something from her bag. With her back to him she closed her eyes and opened them glad that he couldn't see her face. "Nothing" she said her voice almost breaking as she hated lying to him.

"Well if it's nothing can you tell m-" "Tony, just let it go okay?" she was fast to snap at him scared that anybody would hear and get suspicious as well. Unluckily Gibbs had just reached their desks and was about to call out for the usual "gear up", but he stopped on his tracks as he heard Ziva snap at Tony in a way he wasn't used to hearing and the look on Tony's face told him that something was off.

"DiNozzo" Gibbs said shortly "Abby's lab". Tony took a last glance at Ziva before he forced himself up from his desk and walked away. "Everything okay?" He asked as he turned his gaze from Tony to Ziva. Ziva turned her gaze too Gibbs and shortly said "perfect".

They had wrapped the case the same day, and that night Tony stood outside Ziva's door, knocking for ten minutes with no reply. "You do now I'm not going anywhere, right?" he yelled. That caused a couple of neighbors to open the door and close them again when Tony showed them his badge.

Ten seconds after that Ziva open the door, but only a little bit; "she's hiding something" Tony thought.

"Ziva… what's going on with you?" "Tony, I already told you.." she tried. "I know what you told me. But Ziva, whatever it is you are hiding, my gut's telling me it will end badly" he told her as he was trying to keep eye contact with her; but she was trying to avoid looking him directly in the eyes, focusing on the light outside the hall.

Finally she looked at him. "Look.. I do not want to lie to you Tony. But I can't tell you what's going on" She looked at him with pleading eyes "so please... please do not make me lie to you." "Ziva. You're scaring me. What is going on?"

"Oh no…" She said as she realized she had said to much "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…" he stopped the door before she could close it. "Don't do this… C'mon Ziva, tell me" he said stepped a little forward and looked deep into her eyes. Her heart broke when she saw how scared he was and felt his hands shaking a little as he had now placed them on her cheeks.

Ziva reached for something in her pants pocket but her eyes never left his. She opened he little piece of paper and stared at it before giving it to Tony. He had eventually dropped his hands from her cheeks and took the paper.

"Oh god… Monique" Tony gasped as he saw the picture of Monique's head in a box. In the corner of the picture there was written something in Hebrew and Tony understood what it said. It gave him the chills after he read it.

"Do you understand what it says?" She asked him hesitantly with a breaking voice, not wanting to say it out loud.

"I will take everyone around you. Piece by piece. Surrender. You're life for theirs" Tony said as his breathing was getting heavier. He knew what she was going to say next.

"Ziva, I'm so sorry." He said as he saw she was beginning to cry. She let out a little sob before trying to put up the walls again and he saw her struggle to find her voice.

"Tony I…" she said with her voice breaking "No. No." he said raising his voice.

"Just listen to me" she tried but the way Tony's eyes burned into hers made her shiver; he was furious.

"What, what are you doing now? Is it the guilt? Do you feel like this is going to end the anger? Are you doing penance all over again?"

"Tony, you are being way out of line, way out of…" she said as she remembered the last time he asked her that; when she told him he shouldn't have come for her in Somalia.

"Why are you doing this?!" He took her by her arms shaking her, not wanting to hurt her, but feeling so powerless and scared that he had to just, wake her up. Shake her out of the dangerous state and thoughts she was in.

"Don't you get it? He will not stop until he gets to me! I need to be ready. I need to find him before he finds me, and I need… I need to be ready for the final fight" she said with a strong voice and eyes screaming determination even though tears were streaming down her face. Tony felt like he had taken a blow to his stomach.

"That's what you've been doing these past weeks isn't it? You have been digging without us. Without me" the hurt was clear in his voice when he said the last sentence.

"I'm trying to protect you" she said as she got closer to him, placing her hands on his cheeks; trying to make him understand… that she was just… wanted to protect him.

Her sad face made him want to crawl into a whole for making her feel that way. But he could not let her do this alone; he would lose her and that thought made him sick to his bones.

"I don't need you protect me. I need to protect you" he said

"Why" she asked as they got just a little closer to each other. "Because you're my partner" he said with a whisper emphasizing the word 'partner' as he placed his shaking hands on hers and let the first tear escaped his eye.. "And because…" he whispered as he looked deep into her eyes "… I love you".

With that he took her in his arms not wanting to let her go again. He knew that she wasn't safe. But what killed him more was that she didn't want to be safe. And it made him shiver to even think about living one day without her. He would find a way to protect her, but for now he just wanted to hold her in his arms. She was safe for now.