I Don't Shine If You Don't Shine

Chapter one- A typical Friday

"Frank..Frank..FRANK!" I was suddenly awoken from my mid-class snooze by the whispered shouts of my best friend Gerard.

"I hope you know Mr Smith expects all the work to be finished by lunch bell..." Gerard's harassing tone brought me back down to earth, and as if on cue Mr. Smith appeared in front of me.

"Mr Iero I hope you have completed the set task" he spat. "Cause if you haven't all lunch activities will be suspended and any plans you may have made this week after school may have to be cancelled".

I just looked at him thinking of how hungry I was right then, trying to find a way out of detention and too some food. Gerard suddenly cut in. "Of course he has sir, here's his work I was just borrowing it to ermm..compare answers?.." He hitched his voice at the end as if asking a question he then handed the work sheet I didn't know I had done to Mr. Smith.

"Hmm compare answers huh? Is that your excuse for copying Mr Iero 's work Mr Way?" before Gerard even had a chance to answer Mr Smith went over to the white bored and wrote down Gerard's name. "Copying is not tolerated in an exam class of 16 year olds Mr Way, I shall be seeing you after school."

Gerard looked down at his feet and by this point I was totally confused as to why Gerard was now the one in trouble and why he had been accused of copying work I had never even started.

The bell rang for lunch and I walked out quickly, waiting at the door as Gerard got a second warning. "I'm sorry sir" Gerard sniffed and quickly walked out the door signalling me to follow.

"What the hell was all that?" I almost shouted.

"Well..while you were sleeping I did your work for you..as well as my own, but Mr Smith clearly thought I had been the one to copy you.." Gerard's voice trailed off in a melancholy manner. Gerard was top of the class, always did his work to A grade standards and never fell behind, so getting shouted at for copying was a big deal to him.

"Well why the bloody hell didn't you just tell him that! Wait..why the bloody hell did you even do that for me?" I splayed my arms all over the place trying to find reasoning.

"I didn't want you to get in trouble.." Gerard's bleak tone made me want to wrap him in a hug and thank him repeatedly, but all I could think was why he had done that for me. In our 10 years of friendship he had never failed an exam in my name.

Since nor I or Gerard said anything he continued "You have been in too much trouble lately I thought you needed a break, and I didn't want to eat lunch alone again while you were in detention plus I didn't think I would get in trouble.." He trailed off in the same melancholy way.

"Gerard..I..thanks man" I couldn't think of anything to say so merely patted him on the back and started to walk. Gerard had always been there for me, getting me out of fights, doing my homework, comforting me while I cried about my problems. He really was a great friend I don't know what I would have done growing up without him to guide me through the rough patches, especially when my mom passed away and I was left with an aggressive and grieving father to pick up the pieces.

"Don't think you can make a habit of this though Mr!" He shot back playfully, waving away the sombre atmosphere between us.

We walked down the gravel path on the way to the nearest burger bar. It was a nice day and I was feeling surprisingly good seeming though I had just had two hours of science with Mr Smith.

"You look hungry." Gerard said blankly as I watched him sit down with his freshly ordered burger and chips. That was one of the things that annoyed me about Gerard. He was extremely intelligent but loved to state the obvious, especially when he was observing me. I ignored the obvious statement and pouted my lips.

"I forgot to bring money" I said through gritted teeth, the hunger affecting my now very pissed off mood.

"Awww don't be sulky Frankie." He cooed in a teasing manner. I glared at him and balled my fists, trying to keep my temper under control.

He sat back in his seat beside me and stared at me with a smile on his face. This made my anger boil even more and I looked away. "Your food will get cold if you just stare at me all day." I snapped sharply.

"It's not for me so it doesn't matter." I turned to face him confused. "What?" I questioned.

"I'm not hungry. I brought it for you because you had no money, now eat up grumpy before it gets cold." He smirked and pushed the food towards me. I couldn't help but wonder why he had brought me food before he even knew I had no money, things didn't quit add up. Despite the joy that was now surging through my body I still questioned him. "You didn't even know I had no money when you ordered.." He looked at me slightly startled.

"When I saw you didn't order I knew you must have forgotten your money." He smiled.

It was a fair answer but why hadn't Gerard brought himself something, if he wasn't hungry like he said why did he look weak, and why was his stomach making a rumbling noise.

"Why didn't you buy yourself something?" I questioned in a monotone voice.

"Like I said I wasn't hungry" He shrugged his shoulders but clearly saw I knew he was lying and gave in. "Okay fine, I only had enough money for me but when I saw you didn't order.. I decided to buy you food instead."His voice was almost a whisper. I just looked at Gerard for what seemed like ages, scanning over his kind face and beautiful eyes. I wanted to kiss him so much right then like so many other times before but I knew I couldn't. So instead I pulled him into a tight embrace and closed my eyes, the feeling of butterflies and warmth surging through my whole body.

"This is why I love you man" I joked and laughed into his shoulder. But the thing is it wasn't a joke. I meant every word from the heart. I had fallen in love with Gerard years ago but never been able to tell him. I mean, what would he think if his best friend suddenly declared undying love for him, not to mention his male best friend. He would run a mile and never want to be friend's again that's what he would think. He sure made it hard for me though. He was always acting gay around me for a joke, casually touching me and not meaning anything by it. But it sure meant a lot to me, every touch made my stomach tie in knots and my heart pound violently against my chest. I didn't know how much longer I could take it.

"It's only a burger frank." he laughed back into my neck as the waitress gave us a dirty look obviously thinking we were an item. "I know Gerard." I breathed back wondering why the hug was lasting so long, not that I protested.

Gerard's hands stayed tight around me, rubbing my back up and down slowly as I tried with all my strength not to kiss him. This meant nothing I told myself repeatedly, he was only being a caring friend. His hands wandered up my back and entangled their way into my dark brown locks. A shiver was sent down my spine and I thought he might have noticed because he pulled away gently. He swallowed as our eyes locked. We looked at each other with wide eyes and still features for what seemed to be exceptionally long. For a small moment I thought he might be feeling the same way I was but he obviously thought our stare was too intense as he looked down and placed his hand on my thigh. I let out a sharp breath, he was breaching dangerous territory here and I could feel myself getting turned on at his touch. He rubbed up and down and smiled removing his hand. I gave him a weak smile in return half wanting him to put his hand back but half thankful he had removed it before I got too turned on.

It almost appeared he was having the same internal struggle I was but as he pushed the food forward and grinned dopily I suddenly wasn't so sure.

"Come on Frank eat up." He insisted with a giggle, removing me from my line of thought.

"Let's share." I smiled weakly and pushed the burger over to him. He tore the burger in half and passed half to me.

"Frank sharing food, wow you must love me." He joked as he rammed the burger into his mouth, tearing pieces off hungrily. I merely laughed at his comment as we finished off the rest of our food in a hurry, glancing at the clock and realising that due to our hugging session we only had a few minutes to get back to school.

We finished up and left the burger bar. I shivered as the no longer warm weather hit me. I saw Gerard look at me concerned as I bobbed side to side trying to warm up. "I forgot my jacket." I breathed, and was suddenly startled as I felt Gerard's warm arms wrap around me once more.

"We can't have you being cold now can we."