Hey here's a fic I never actually planned on making but then I watched the film again and figured, what the heck?

I hope you guys like it!

Enjoy!


Kenna's POV

I sipped quietly on my drink in the corner of the bar, watching the other villains; Hook was playing the piano while a Witch sang, the Puppet Master burped as he downed his sixteenth beer while Cyclops rode the mechanical bull, whooping and hollering like a drunken wild animal…so not much difference really. I chuckled at my own thoughts, taking a gulp of my drink. I'm glad I was just drinking apple juice, no way in hell was I turning out like any of these losers.

"Heeeyyy beautiful," a shady character with one eye and dirty clothes said, hiccupping as he struggled to keep his balance as he leaned against my table. I looked up at him through my russet coloured fringe, swiped over my right ear while the rest was pulled into a messy ponytail. My amber eyes swooped over him and I knew straight away that he was one of the drunk losers.

"What?" I snapped, taking another swig.

"How about you, hiccup, and me…rent one of the rooms," he said, giving me what I'm guessing was supposed to be a toothy grin, if he hadn't lost most of his teeth.

"How about instead…I leave the knife that is currently sitting in my boot alone instead of imbedding it in your thick skull!" I snapped. The man only teetered on the spot, swaying on the spot as he giggled drunkly. Standing up, I poked him on his skinny, undefined chest and watched with satisfaction as he slowly began to fall backwards before he crashed to the ground.

Sighing, I sat back down and returned my gaze to my drink. While it was a nice release from all my other troubles, it could only keep me away from the real world for so long. I feel I should explain about myself;

My name's Kenna…that's it no last name. I'm an orphan and have been since I watched my parents die when I was eight so I abandoned my last name. For the past eight years I've been fending for myself. At first they tried to see how I would do in an orphanage but when all the kids kept annoying me and the grown ups tried to relate to me I gave up, packed up my belongings (which consisted of the clothes I was wearing and a pendant I kept under my shirt) and hi-tailed it out of there.

From then on I had been living on the run. It was only when I hit sixteen did the authorities stop chasing me because I was underage and parentless. Now they only chased me because of my job. Obviously I had to make money somehow and, after a week of living in the forest near a small village, I learned something pretty cool about myself; I was good at stealing stuff.

I know it sounds bad to brag about this kind of thing but when it's the only thing I'm good at, I'm going to brag about it. So I made my way through life by being a thief/mercenary for hire. Unfortunately for me that meant having to constantly dodge the cops.

But, coming back to the now, here I was, sitting in a stingy pub drinking apple juice. I know it's stupid to wish for a happily ever after, especially after Fairy Godmother up and…popped I guess would be the nicest way to put it, but I just wish I could finally stop running and have a life of my own.

Suddenly the door to the pub swung open and in walked a tall guy with trimmed and wavy blonde hair, a strong jaw and probably some of the cleanest clothes I've seen in pretty much all my life. I knew who this guy was;

Prince Charming.

I glared with the rest of the villains as Charming wormed his way around the pub before heading to the bar. I, along with the rest of the villains, hated the way he openly called himself one of us. He knew nothing about being a real villain, having to struggle to stay alive. Sure some villain's overdid it by trying to take over an entire kingdom, but we all had it rough.

Charming though, had the cushiest life ever and he still had the nerve to act like we were his best friends, like he was one of us. I lost interest as he started talking to Mabel the barmaid, going back to my drink. This could be my last nice thing for a while, nobody was hiring and hadn't been for a while. I was getting desperate.

"And Fuzzy Navels for all my friends!" Hook smashed his hooked hand on the keys, slicing them into shreds at Charming's outburst. The other villains got up, Evil Queen breaking her pool queue in half for good measure. They all advanced on him but I stayed where I was. I couldn't be asked to beat him up now, I'll get him later when the others are done with him.

"We're not your friends," Hook rightly stated, letting the other villain's push Charming against the bar before Mabel held him down. He shoved his hook into Charming's face. "You don't belong here," he spat, pressing the tip against his neck. Charming started spluttering nervously.

"You're right; oh you're absolutely right. But do any of us really?" he said, attempting to push Hook's…hook away.

"Do a number on his face," Cyclops said, giggling with sickening glee. I tuned out as Charming started spouting ton after ton of bullshit in an attempt to keep from getting mauled.

I watched from my table as he started to work the crowd, going from the Evil Queen, to Puppet Master and then to Rumplestiltskin (Or Frumpypigskin as he called him.) He even managed to get Hook to back off.

"Once upon a time someone decided that we were the losers. But there are two sides to every story and our side as yet to be told." I lifted my head in interest as the others all started to agree with Charming. For a Slimeball he was starting to make sense. "So who will join me? Who wants to come out on top for one? Who wants their happily ever after?" My head tilted to the side.

Happily Ever After?

The crowd all cheered, clinking glasses. As soon as a thug broke his glass against someone else's I knew a fight was about to break out. Downing the last of my apple juice, I got up from table just as two trees tackled each other onto it, and nimbly threaded through the brawling crowd until I reached Charming at the bar who was nervously sipping his drink.

"Hey!" I snapped and he jumped, swivelling around to look down at me. He sneered.

"And what do you want?" he asked, taking another sip of his fruity drink.

"I want to help you take down the ogre," I said and his eyebrows shot up. "Oh don't look so surprised. Everyone knows that Shrek totally humiliated you." Charming sneered again but I only smirked.

"You have quite the attitude," he said. I shrugged.

"Whatever, it keeps the money coming when clients see my no-bullshit style," I said. Charming's eyebrows raised.

"Clients? Are you a hooke-"

"Thief and mercenary for hire!" I cut off. I hated when people assumed just because I was a girl (And quite attractive if I must say so myself-don't judge me I'm just going by how many times drunk guys like to take a shot at me) that they think when I say clients I'm talking about men. "And I'm offering my services," I finished. Charming looked me up and down.

"What's in it for you?" he asked.

"A bag of gold up front and immunity from the law once you're king," I said. Charming smirked.

"Sounds reasonable and smart." he held out his hand. "You've got a deal." I shook his hand, noticing how weak his handshake was. I refrained from saying anything "Now what are you going to do to earn your half?" he asked.

"I heard from a source of mine that Shrek is getting a crew and sailing away for a few days. I'm pretty sure I can get on that crew," I said. Charming nodded.

"Good, do that and stall his trip so that I have enough time to take the kingdom," he said and I nodded.

"Ok,. Give me my gold," I said. He snickered.

"Fine. I'll meet you here tomorrow and give you your payment." I nodded.

"Fine, then I'll set out tomorrow."


There you go! More will be up soon

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