Hi! I'm Soon-to-be Mrs. Edward Cullen. This is my first story...so, if you wouldn't mind, could you kindly NOT flame please? (That was a rhetorical question- not a request). Also, PLEASE BE HONEST in reviews because I truly need to know if it's enjoyable. Also, please see my profile for previews on other stories me & my BFF BeeBee (Rebecca Bethany) have coming up for ya'll. So...yeah. Read it. Do. Bye.

PS- Oh no. I did NOT forget a disclaimer!! There it is!!

DISCLAIMER- We don't own Twilight, any of its characters, or anything in it. (Except Edward and Emmett. Legally, marriage means that they are ours. Edward being mine, and Emmett being Bee's. Ya'll can have Jasper.)

No! I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Shut the hell up! He screamed in return as the back of his hand whipped across my face, stinging my cheek.

I fell to the ground from the shock, and suddenly the battle was over. As I looked into his evil eyes, once so understanding, and saw his vicious snarl pulled against his no-longer-smiling lips, I knew he had me. The moment I had hit the ground, it was over. He towered over me, and I braced myself for the…

The ringing of a bell brought me back to reality, signifying that a customer had walked in. I looked down at the bar I was tending, and realized that, while having my flashback, I had dropped the entire bottle of whisky I'd been wiping. Damn.

Suddenly, I was hit hard with the realization that I was waiting for a reviewer to come in tonight to check out the restaurant. And if they saw the staff dropping whole bottles of alcohol when she's alone, imagine what she could do to a customer. The spill I'd just created wouldn't go over so well with a critic.

I hurriedly wiped up the mess I'd just made- God I'm such a screw- making sure not to look the man in the eye. It was easy enough to do- his back was to me; he was looking all over the restaurant, trying to see if he truly was the only one in the place. The little bar where worked was always so empty, it was surprising I didn't find cobwebs in the alcohol.

Without warning, the boy turned and looked me dead-on, and suddenly I found myself lost in his riveting green eyes. Normally I wasn't one to go weak at the knees over a guy, but you should've seen him.

His hair, unique in its bronze coloring, was messy by accident, non-gelled and poking out in every direction. (I grew up with a brother- I know what's natural and what's not.) His face, chiseled and pale, was kind and warm with gentle understanding. Even though I had no idea who this Greek God was, I could still comprehend the tenderness of him. His muscles, visible even through his black long-sleeved button-down, were the kind you could only get from real manual labor- not Bally Total Fitness. Jenny-20 couldn't give you that look.

But his eyes- as soon as I looked into them, my legs turned to jelly and my heart melted into soup. My train of thought didn't just stop- oh no, it crashed into a brick wall and disintegrated, right then and there. Over the sound of my own pounding heart, I actually heard that collision.

Okay, fine, that thump was my pounding heart, but come on. I'm being romantic.

Somewhere between describing the mess this gorgeous guy had made me and narrating my entire life to someone who probably isn't even there, I realized with a pang of humiliation that the Calvin Klein model was speaking- either to me, or he was telling his life story to some nonexistent person, too.

"Excuse me?" he asked, and I was sure my thought train, while combusting, had probably landed in my ear and caused my hearing to fail. No normal human being could have a voice so intensely perfect.

My heart skipped about three beats, and my breath was completely gone. So that's why this perfect being was in my sight- he was an angel. I was dead. Crap.

"Hi…um…. Welcome to the…uh…." OMIGOD! I was so completely lost in his brilliant jade eyes that I actually forgot the name of the restaurant! It should be illegal for anyone to have this much power over someone else. "Welcome to the bar. Sorry about our lack of specials boards- our digital pricing chart is down, so please, don't hesitate to ask me about any questions you may have…" Oh God! That made NO SENSE. He probably thinks I'm mentally handicapped or something.

"Yes, actually, if you wouldn't mind, I do have a question on pricing." He flashed a beautiful crooked smile that made my heart stop. My brain shut down entirely, and I was sure that if I didn't have something to drink in the next thirty seconds I would just…die. That's it. I'd just die.

"I don't mind," I blurted without thinking. Sht!!

"How much does it cost to buy a beautiful girl a drink?" he asked, still wearing that smile that made me almost fall over. I literally had to clutch the bar for support.

At that moment, however, the whole world froze. The entire earth ceased rotating and hung dead still in space. I stared at him, having to clench my teeth to keep my mouth from gaping open. Then suddenly, in a split second, God probably took pity on me as he saw these were probably my last few moments on Earth, because this perfect being in my presence was going to stop my heart entirely. So God, being the good that he is, gave me the most amazing gift a girl could ask for when she was being graced with the presence of an angel.

God have me confidence.

I suddenly released the bar and relaxed my mouth, and looked him dead in the eye. (I'd seen that on an ABC soap once- it always worked for the sexy female lead and it was going to work for me, dammit.) I relaxed my entire body so I was leaning forward across the bar toward him with my butt in the air.

Okay- that was a bit too much.

His expression altered in that second- his charming smile became one of surprise for a moment at my changed attitude, but then went back to being that of a slick New Yorker trying to get a girl back to his apartment.

"That depends."

He looked a bit surprised again, but kept up his banter. "Depends? On what?"

"Well, where is this girl?" I asked him, pretending not to know he was referring to me.

"Turn around; she's right behind you." He lifted his chin in the general direction of the rows of alcohol waiting patiently behind me. Behind that liquor sat- what else?- a giant mirror.

"That's not all it depends on," I continued our flirtation, leaning closer to him.

"Really? On what else then, pray tell?"

"On whether the guy had I.D. and…" I leaned closer still and whispered, "Whether that girl accepts charity."

He looked unfazed by my downright sexy delivery. He reached into his pocket and, without taking his eyes from my face, pulled out his license: aged 25.

"What if it wasn't charity, then?" he challenged, looking deeper into my eyes. If he kept this going any longer I'd lose my gift from above and fall over.

"Oh? Well, what would the girl have to give in return?"

"A number," he replied simply, smiling a perfect poker I-have-a-royal-flush-and-am-about-to-kick-your-ass grin.

"Hmm…I'd have to check the price of that." I smiled alluringly, then walked away, pretending to be looking at the screen behind me, but really watching him out of the corner of my eye as he checked out my…jeans.

"Huh, it seems to be down," I finally interrupted his blatant staring. "Well, since it seems this beautiful girl of yours left, we wouldn't want that drink to go to waste then, would we?"

"Oh, that would be a shame," he smiled wider. "Because then, I'd have to give you a bad review."

When my mouth dropped open, I knew my moment of confidence was over.

I quickly composed myself and turned away from him to pour some vodka. I handed him one and lifted the other in the air. "Cheers."