(College!AU)

Dean Winchester was in his dorm. He was alone, Metallica playing gently in the background. His feet were up on his desk as he swung mindlessly on his chair, his pen resting between his teeth. He had been attempting to do some revision but – as usual – he wasn't being too successful.

There was a knock on the door and Dean jumped, despite knowing it would only be his roommate returning from his classes.

Castiel entered the dorm moments after the knock, his hair blown across his face from the strong wind outside. Even though this was his room – his home - as much as it was Dean's, he made a habit of knocking before entering. He had walked in on Dean with some random girl too many times to count. It was an experience he made an effort to avoid going through again.

"Hello, Dean." He brushed his hair out of his eyes. "Did you skip your classes again?"

Dean spun around in his chair, eyes wide. "Oh no! You're not going to dob on me, are you?" He teased, grinning at the confusion on Cas' face. He chuckled lightly, tapping his pen on his knee. His roommate was such a geek - always lecturing Dean about how important it was to intend all his classes, always worrying about him when he didn't…which was frequently.

Cas just sighed, used to Dean's sarcastic sense of humor. He removed his book bag from his shoulder and slumped down on his own computer chair. "This isn't funny Dean. I don't want to see you flunk out of college," he said sternly, looking at the other male with sad blue eyes.

Dean just shrugged. He appreciated Cas' concern but nonetheless, failed to grasp the point in his argument. "I suppose it's my life, man." If he was going to flunk out, then he was going to flunk out. He'd never been one to plan - to imagine a dreamy future, with a stable job, the house, the white picket fence and the wife and kids. He took life as it came. Day by day. It was the only way he knew how to survive.

"I suppose it is, but I think you should try caring about it a little more," Cas sighed once again, If Dean wanted to slack off then there was nothing Cas could do about it. He reached into his book bag and turned to face his desk. He had a lot of studying to do. It was Cas, he always had a lot of studying to do. Even in his break, he found work to consume himself with.

Dean continued to twirl mindlessly around on his chair, tapping his pen. He was bored. He hadn't left the room all day and his legs were beginning to throb. He looked at the back of Castiel, who was now hunched over his desk, attempting to work. "I was...ah, thinking of grabbing a beer. Do you want to come?"

Cas paused for a moment, removing his gaze from his work briefly. He thought over his options. He hadn't been for a drink in quite some time… but he did have an exam tomorrow that he needed to study for. He shrugged, turning to face Dean. "I suppose one drink will be okay."

Dean, honestly, was shocked that he had convinced Castiel so easily. "It's good for the brain cells." Dean joked, tapping his index finger to his forehead. Cas just glared back at him.

Laughing, Dean scooped his jacket up in his arms, opening the door and waiting for Cas. "Come on then, leave those books behind - at least for an hour."

Cas bit his lip, "I did just say that one drink would be okay."

"Alright," Dean shrugged, pulling his jacket over his shoulders as he did so. "I'm just glad you're coming. It's not easy to get you out of that damn room." It was true, Castiel was always so preoccupied with his study.

Castiel followed him out of the room. "I find it actually very easy to get me out of the room. I just need to have a class or something important going on that requires me to physically leave the room," he explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. His answer, just about made Dean snort with laughter.

"You are such a nerd." He teased, elbowing Castiel softly in his side. He loved it though- how the two of them were complete opposites, but fit together so perfectly.

"That depends on your definition of the word nerd," he retorted back, but smiled showing he understood it was just a joke.

"You are the definition, Castiel." Dean chuckled as they made their way out of the building. "Always fifteen minutes early to classes, handing assignments in early, and declining parties...for study. You are the true definition."

Castiel thought about this briefly, scowling as he did so. "I think I fit the definition of a good student more than a nerd." He didn't understand why Dean teased him, just because he cared so much about doing well. Dean caught this hint of sadness in Cas and bit his lip, hoping he hadn't upset him. He hoped Castiel knew him well enough to understand it was only part of his sarcastic personality.

It was cold outside; Cas wrapped his arms around himself, trying to warm up. He turned to Dean, wanting to draw the attention away from himself. "Maybe you will have more success hooking up with the bartender tonight. How many times has she rejected you now?" Cas asked, glad it was his turn to finally tease Dean a little.

Dean laughed, but soon found himself blushing furiously. He hid his face. Dean Winchester did not fucking blush. "I don't know man, maybe not tonight..." He trailed off, cursing himself.

Cas cocked his head a little in confusion. Dean was always tailing after that bartender, almost every chance he got. Dean wouldn't pass up a chance just like that. "If you're uncomfortable about going to this bar then we can go someplace else," he offered, thinking it was because Dean didn't want to see her in the first place.

Dean shook his head, trying to gulp down the lump that had formed in his throat. "No. No, Cas. It's okay. Really, we'll go to the normal bar." He felt his fingers clench into fists at his sides. Fuck. He cursed in his head. Fuck.

Cas stopped walking altogether now, as if it had heard Dean's internal swearing. He studied Dean's face carefully. "Are you certain we should be going out drinking? Something seems to be bothering you."

Fuck. Dean clenched his eyes shut, pressing his fingers to his forehead. Why had he said anything? He always said the wrong things. "Yeah...it's okay Cas. I'm just - I'm having ... you know those days when you just feel really far from yourself?" He wasn't making sense. He shook his head, completely embarrassed.

"I don't understand," Cas stated simply, watching Dean carefully. "Are you perhaps having doubts about what you are studying? You know, almost everyone has those moments when they feel they may have forsaken their own future. It's okay to feel that way."

Dean shook his head again. "It's okay. I just...I'm a bit confused about what I want at the moment -" He cut himself off, suddenly straightening his shoulders and continuing on walking. They'd come out to drink, to have a good time. They'd only just made it to the bar and the night was already travelling downhill, fast.

"You'll figure it out eventually, Dean." Castiel smiled warmly as they made their way inside, taking a moment to adjust their eyes to the different lighting. "I have faith in you," He added, hoping to provide Dean with some form of comfort.

"Yeah." Dean tried his best to smile. "Thanks bud." He breathed in the familiar scent of the campus bar. He came here almost every night – it was always the same. The same alcohol, the same music, the same goddamn people. He was thankful to be here with Castiel for a change. Quietly, he walked his familiar path to the counter and ordered two beers. "It's on me." he told Cas, sliding a twenty dollar note across the bar.

"Thank you, Dean." Cas decided not to argue with Dean and just accept the kind gesture. He'd leave money on Dean's side of the room later. Once seated, Dean let his head roll forward - glad to be in familiar atmosphere of the bar. The bartender slid their drinks across the counter and Cas nursed his beer snug to his chest as he gazed around the bar.

Dean raised his glass up to Cas, in a toast, before tipping his head back and drinking the beer down in one gulp, slamming it back down on the bench with a gasp. He signaled the bartender for another drink. Cas observed Dean as he did so. "You must really be trying to drown something if you're drinking them that fast already," He commented, taking a long swig of his own drink.

Dean raised an eyebrow in agreement, swigging his next drink. "Drowning is a good way to put it." Fuck. Why was he still speaking? Everything that came out of his mouth was regret after regret.

Cas scowled again. "Please don't do that. If something is troubling you I would rather you tell me." He paused, sighing. "Then again, it is you that we are talking about here. You are not one to share your sorrows." He quickly downed the rest of his beer and signaled to the bartender for another.

Dean chuckled sourly – mutually loving and hating how well Castiel knew him. He gulped down his beer, squinting, "It's not because I don't want to, it's because...I don't know how." He'd never really been given the opportunity to talk about his sorrows at any point in his life. He was always looking after others, his father never really encouraging him to open up to him. Talking about his 'inner-self' was new territory to Dean. And it frightened the crap out of him.

"I'm not sure how to help you either. You could just try talking about it. Whatever is on your mind, just say it," Cas offered, not understanding how difficult it was for Dean to say anything. He was not used to dealing with these kind of situations. Dean appreciated that Cas was trying to help him. He appreciated it a lot. No one had ever really tried to help him before, not in the way Cas did.

Dean looked around him, suddenly not liking being in such a public place, when such a...private conversation had arisen. "I don't think I've quite found the strength to even think it yet Cas...let alone say it."

Castiel contemplated this. "Okay then don't think about it. Block it from your mind completely." He cursed himself a little. That was horrible advice. Cas called the bartender over and ordered a few shots for them to share. "Not that I agree with you drinking away your sorrows, but I figured you need something a little stronger."

A slight smile played at the corners of Dean's lips. "Thanks." He chinked his glass to Cas', swigging the liquid down in one gulp. "Really, man - thanks."

"No problem," Cas gasped as he felt the stronger liquor slid down his throat. It was much rougher than the beer and he wasn't used to it. He'd never been much of a drinker. In fact, he hardly ever drank before he met Dean. Dean had influenced Castiel in countless ways - his higher alcohol consumption being one of them. Dean noticed Castiel's struggle to choke down the shot and smiled warmly, nudging a second glass towards him.

"It gets better - it'll warm on you." He swigged down his own second shot, watching as Cas looked at the glass hesitantly. He grabbed the class and tilted his head back, hoping it would help it go down smoother than the first. So much for one drink. After a while, Cas ended up having a few more shots. By the time he was on his fourth, he was leaning heavily on the counter, looking at Dean lazily. He looked as if he could fall asleep any moment. The alcohol had gone to Castiel's head faster than Dean had expected. A part of Dean regretted asking Cas to come out with him, fearing his roommate would be furious with him when he sobered up. Dean swigged down one last shot, leaving a tip on the bar. "I think it's time we get you back to the dorm." He sighed, tugging lightly on Castiel's jacket.

"No. I don't wanna," Cas slurred, batting away Dean's hand as he proceed to finish off what was left of his beer. Truth was, Cas didn't want to stand. He wasn't exactly sure he would be able to able to support himself.

Dean sighed, sliding a sturdy arm under his. "No, come on you. Home time." He scooped him off the stool, his body slumping against his. Supporting his weight, he dragged him towards the door. Cas stumbled quite a bit as Dean dragged him along. He tried to look around at his surroundings with heavy lidded eyes. Once in a while he would erupt into a small fit of laughter, but otherwise he was silent as he was being lead, tight in Dean's arms, back to their dorm.

"Shit." Dean hissed as he reached their room, fumbling with the door knob. "You are going to murder me when you sober up." He dragged Cas' limp body to his bed, plumping him down on the mattress.

"I could never murder you Dean," Cas slurred, as he fumbled for his book bag at the edge of his bed. Even though he was heavily intoxicated, something in his mind was telling him that he needed to study.

"Cas, stop." Dean's hand flew to Cas', grasping it and tugging it away from his books. He rested Cas' hand back by his side and pulled a pillow under his head.

"No. I have an exam tomorrow," he whined, glaring up at Dean for interfering with his attempt to study, before laughing wildly again. He seemed to be suddenly amused by Dean's face. He moved his pointer finger to Dean's forehead. "Boop." He cried with a goofy smile on his face. Dean couldn't help but chuckle at Castiel's sudden burst of childlike innocence. He smiled, plying Cas' finger from his face and placing it, once more, back at his side.

"Alright, mister...I think it's sleepy time for little Castiel."

Cas looked up at Dean as if he grew another head. "You too," he murmured, grabbing onto Dean's arm loosely and trying to pull him onto his bed with him. Something churned within Dean's gut at the touch - a warmth like no other exploded in his chest. Hearing it, feeling Cas' hand on him, made him want what he refused to admit to so much more. He wanted to give in to the sensation. But he didn't. He couldn't. Not when Cas was like this. It'd be taking advantage of him.

He pulled back. "No, Cas. By yourself."

Cas pouted up at Dean before rolling on his side, facing the wall, and huffing loudly. "Fine. I didn't want to sleep with you anyways," he slurred out, peaking at Dean over his shoulder as he said it.

Dean clenched his hands, nails digging into his palms as he tried to resist the urges that burned within him and threatened to seep out. He couldn't...take advantage of Cas like this. But at the same time, he didn't have the strength to walk away from him now. Slowly, carefully, he pulled back in closer to Cas until he was spooning him. His hands stayed firmly by his sides, still clenched in tight fists. Sighing contently in response, Cas made sure there was no space between them as he pressed his back against Dean's chest. He squirmed a few more times before finally settling and closing his eyes, finding that he enjoyed the close proximity of Dean's body.

Dean didn't realise he had been holding his breath until his chest started to throb. He breathed, moving in closer to Castiel, marveling at his warmth. He blushed, edging away slightly when he felt a tightness forming in his pants and hating himself for coming so far. Cas felt Dean move away so he moved his body with Dean's, having no intention of allowing Dean to leave his side.

"Knife in your pocket," he mumbled sleepily, when his butt came into contact with Dean's groin area, though he didn't seem to mind.

Dean's cheeks burned and his eyes clenched shut with embarrassment. "Yes." He breathed, hoping Cas was too drunk to figure out how odd it would be for him to have a knife in his pocket. "Must be. Sorry."

"It's alright. Just promise me you won't stab me with it," he mumbled again, sleep finally taking over. He was out before he could hear a response.

Dean chuckled. "I promise." He sighed. He raised his head when Castiel fell silent. "Cas?" No reply. He contemplated getting off the bed and going back to his own, but something kept him in that bed. He wrapped his arms delicately around Castiel, sliding even more closely towards him. As he drifted into unconsciousness, he tried his best to ignore the throbbing in his crotch.