Author's Note: This is my first, and only, songfic. I'm reposting this a few months after took it down for containing song lyrics that I know aren't mine. In essence, I'm sticking it to the man.
Disclaimer: Inu-Yasha and its characters are property of Rumiko Takahashi and Viz. The song "I Need You" is performed by and property of Leann Rimes. Nothing is owned by me.
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I Need You
By Calliope
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"I don't need a lot of things.
I can get by with nothing."
A cold breeze swept through the forest, the only audible sounds being those of the night insects and animals. The oni had fallen to the ground with a sickening thud, the odd angle of its neck more than explaining its currently un-shifting position. Inu Yasha leaned over the creature's now lifeless body and plucked the stolen Shikon Jewel from its rapidly cooling hands. Apparently, his enemies were not maturing in their intelligence at all: they actually thought he, the great half-demon Inu Yasha and wielder of the Tetsusaiga, could be defeated by one mere oni. When will the completely moronic evolve to just plain stupid? Feh, no time soon, it seemed. Until that fabled day, it seemed as though Inu Yasha would simply have to exercise his fighting skills against those who could not possibly hope to claim victory over him. Besides, the dumb beast should have known better than to attack Kagome while she was bathing.
A rosy blush slowly crept its way up his cheeks at the memory of seeing her in the hot spring. He stopped that train of thought right then and there. Where do you come off thinking of her in that way? He was becoming as bad as Mikoru the perverted priest...
No I'm not! I have a trip around the demon world and back again before I'm anywhere near as sick as he is! he assured himself avidly, shaking the last thoughts from his mind as he headed back to the village. Gods, if Kagome and the others could hear him now, he'd never hear the end of it!
He stopped dead in his tracks. Kagome. In his haste to chase after the oni, he had neglected to check on her condition before he rushed off. He hadn't been able to see the full extent of her injuries or confirm if she even had any to begin with. How stupid could he be! Well, no, stupid wasn't the word...pissed off was more like it. No other thought but revenge had crossed his mind when he realized that Kagome had been attacked, and her assailant had made off with the Shikon Jewel. It had been that same way every other time, too, for a while now.
He convinced himself it was only because she could sense the shards and was of some usefulness on their quest to restore the Shikon Jewel to its former, whole self.
It sounded weak, even to his demon ears.
"But of all the blessings I can bring,
I've always needed something."
As he was gloating to himself over his latest triumph, he slowly began to notice something in his surroundings with that innate sixth sense of his that had kept him alive countless times in the past.
Why did the forest seem so cold and lifeless tonight? He quickly scanned the sky, but that idea was soon squashed beneath the full moon's harsh white light. No, there was nothing different about him physically, but still there was something different about...everything. The whole atmosphere of the place he had known since his childhood was strangely foreign to him that night. It felt...
Empty. That's what it was. It was filled with emptiness and a stark loneliness hung in the air like something just out of reach, taunting but never tangible.
But the forest was always empty at night, and during the day, for that matter. What was so strange about the way it felt now? Then, all at once he realized what it was with a sudden glance at the prayer beads forever bound about his neck.
It was not the trees that echoed with the vast loneliness. It was him.
Then, as soft as a whisper on a spring breeze, he sensed a familiar presence as he neared the edge of the forest.
"But I've got all I want,
and it comes from loving you."
Kagome.
He smiled unconsciously, the void of emptiness no longer present.
For all appearances, she looked like she hadn't incurred any wounds when she had been attacked by the oni. Good. It would be a shame to have only just killed him had he actually hurt her, he thought, baring his fangs ever so slightly. Whoa, calm down boy. Where did that come from!
"Kagome," he called as nonchalantly as he could as she approached him, dressed in her usual odd clothes. "Are you okay?"
The look of anxiety that had been plaguing her features dissipated as she took in the sight of him in perfectly healthy condition. "Mm, I think so. I was just more shocked than anything, I suppose. Did you get the jewel back?" she asked curiously, coming to a halt no more than a meter away from him.
Gulp. She was so near; her scent invaded every one of his heightened senses, grating against his will and urging him to reach out and..."Yeah, I got it. No thanks to your foolishness, by the way," he replied tartly, attempting to mask his unease with an arrogant tone. As he had expected, a haze of indignity rose in her face at his words.
Her eyes are kinda pretty when she's mad...he observed offhandedly, then shook himself from his trance as he realized the affect his harsh words were having on her. He hadn't meant to really insult her.
"Well, it's not like I was just sitting there saying 'Hey, all bad guys, come attack me now!' God, Inu Yasha, why do you always do that! You can think I'm stupid, but don't flaunt your opinion in my face!" she snapped, turning to leave as her tears threatened to rise. Why do I even bother with him! All I ever get in return is an insult.
"Kagome..." he muttered in confusion. "I...I never meant..."
She turned on him. "You never meant to what? To hurt my feelings? Well, I'm sorry, but you have before and you did again. For just once can you...never mind. Never mind anything," she whispered, her anger ebbing away at the pained expression in his eyes.
Why? she puzzled, once again turning to leave. Why should he be so hurt by what I've said? It's not like he actually cares for me, except for the jewel...
...and as Kikyo's replacement, she sadly reminded herself as she caught her reflection in a nearby stream.
"I never realized...why didn't you tell me my words hurt you this much?" Inu Yasha murmured, seemingly lost in shock and his own thoughts. He looked up at her as she stared into the softly gurgling water running beside them through the forest.
"Was it like this with Kikyo?" she sighed, closing her eyes. "No, I suppose not. But, then again, the replacement is never as valuable as the original, is it?"
He froze, staring wide-eyed at the girl in front of him. Is that what she thinks she is to me? Kikyo's replacement! he thought, completely thrown off-guard. Aside from the physical similarities, she didn't remind him at all of his dead love. Not in the least. "Kagome, you...Kikyo was..."
"...nothing like me. I am nothing like Kikyo, I know. You've told me so before," she muttered, beginning to walk back towards the village. "I'm sorry for bothering you."
His hand shot out and grabbed her wrist with an urgency she had never felt before.
"You're my only reason.
You're my only truth."
"Is that what you think? You believe my only reason for staying around you is because you look like Kikyo?" he whispered, his head hanging down in the face of overwhelming emotions and desires.
"Isn't it?" she replied, her voice cold as winter rain. "I have very little reason to believe otherwise. Why should I?"
She slid her wrist from his grasp and slowly walked back towards Kaede's house, never looking back.
Because...I lo-...
He was certain he saw pieces of himself fall and intermix with the rushing coolness swirling about below him.
"I need you like water, like breath, like rain.
I need you like mercy from Heaven's gate."
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"Inu Yasha!"
He was almost knocked to the ground by the force of her arms around him combined with her running momentum. His eyes went wide as she embraced him from behind, tightening her grip when they had steadied somewhat.
"I...I missed you..." she confessed quietly as she began to loosen her crushing arms.
Never before had he experienced the feeling that was coursing through him at that wonderfully singular moment in time.
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"There's a freedom in your arms that carries me through."
"Kagome...," he whispered quietly into the soft breeze. He knew that a day like that would never come again for the two of them. And his heart constricted unbearably at the thought.
"I need you."
The full moon's soft glow was the only light that washed over the young girl as she wept silently, staring at the necklace in her hand. She had returned to her time immediately following the encounter with Inu Yasha in the forest, thinking she would escape the conflicting emotions rising within her. It was becoming painfully obvious that she had been wrong.
A memory from what seemed like a century ago surfaced in her mind: it was when the Shikon Jewel had been shattered by her own arrow, sending its countless pieces scattering across the landscape. Without warning, a hot tear trailed down her cheek and stained her pillow.
Kagome wiped her cheek of the remaining wetness and turned on her back to stare at the ceiling. It was impossible to hold back the tears now as memories and conversations began running through her mind and across the blank whiteness above her, like a movie she just couldn't close her eyes to. All those times...so many experiences...
"I'm a fool," she muttered to herself, hitting the empty space beside her with her fist. "I should have seen this coming. Oh well, it makes no difference. I don't care about him anymore."
Yes, you do.
No, I don't...
Why do you lie to yourself? You know he means...
...nothing to me! He's just an arrogant, selfish, cruel half-demon who...
...has taught you more about yourself than you ever thought possible.
What?
Before you met him, would you ever have considered standing alone against demons or monsters?
N..no...
Would you have been prepared to sacrifice yourself for others?
No...
So you must realize...
NO! Leave me alone!
She threw the necklace across the room and turned on her side, the dull clinking sound of the jewel meeting the wall echoing in her mind. Why did her inner-self insist on bothering her so? The tears came unchecked down her pale cheeks out of sheer frustration.
What do you think he would say if he saw you crying like this?
That I'm a stupid human with overly complicated emotions.
The voice in her head smiled.
And what would you do when he said that?
"Sit."
And...?
Her tears ceased when she realized what her inner self was saying.
I...I would stop crying.
Now. Now you understand.
"You're the heart that moves me to courage again."
Silently, she walked across the floor to the spot where the Shikon Jewel had fallen to, picked it up, and fastened it about her neck once more. She gave one final swipe of her face to clear the last remaining remnants of grief in her eyes. Then, with a smile like that of a small child who has finally understood something very important, she ran towards Bone-Eater's Well.
And him.
"You're the love that rescues me when the cold winter rain ends."
Safely returned to the Warring States Period, Kagome immediately began searching for Inu Yasha when she realized he was not waiting for her in the tree beside the well. He had always waited for her before...
It doesn't matter, she thought to herself as she ran towards Kaede's house. We don't have to be anything more than friends. As long as I'm near him, that's enough.
She caught sight of him sitting beneath a tree near the village, head against his knees and legs drawn up to his chest. Her heart caught in her chest as his perceptive hearing detected her slow approach, and he looked at her with eyes both masked and blatantly easy to read. He was suffering from a great pain, but he was trying his best to hide it.
Even if he doesn't love me, she thought as she stopped in front of him, I will always love him. As long as I can provide that for him to fall back on, I'll be happy.
"Inu Yasha..."
"Kagome..."
"I'm sorry," they both said quietly at the same time. Surprise filled their eyes as they glanced up at one another.
"What are you apologizing for? I'm the one who's the asshole," he muttered, kicking a rock near his foot. "I shouldn't have said those things. I...I didn't mean to hurt you, Kagome."
Her eyes closed as she shook her head, the smile on her mouth one of both sympathy and understanding. "No, Inu Yasha. It's not all your fault. I'm to blame as well, and I shouldn't have run off like that for an entire day," she smiled sadly, lifting her face to meet his gaze.
He drew in a sharp breath at the sight of her eyes. Redness, slight puffiness, and deep lines surrounded her normally jovial gaze and all led to the same conclusion: she had been crying. A lot. Because of me...and what a jerk I am!
"Inu Yasha, what's wrong? Look at me," she pleaded softly, turning his chin towards her with her fingers.
"I'm sorry, Kagome," he whispered. "I made you...your face..."
"And it's so amazing, 'cause that's just how you are."
Tears began to roll down her cheeks once again, but this time she was not crying tears of sadness or melancholy. Could he...! He must! He...
"Don't cry, Kagome! I hate it when you cry. I'm sorry if I said anything..."
"Baka," she murmured, kneeling in front of him.
"And I can't turn back now."
She leaned towards him, not caring if her assumption was correct or not. She needed to show him how she felt, for his own comfort if not for hers. But most of all...
...she needed him...
"You've brought me too far."
Their lips brushed each other for a moment and Inu Yasha's eyes shot wide open.
"I need you like water, like breath, like rain.
I need you like mercy from Heaven's gate."
As he realized it wasn't a dream or a cruel torture, he slowly wrapped his arms around her and drew her to him, his mouth meeting hers as the kiss deepened.
Gods, this felt so inexplicably...right. There was little he could do to hide it now: he was head over heels in love and then some for this strange futuristic girl named Kagome. As they continued to kiss, the void that had been residing within him since Kikyo had died was being filled with something strange, exciting, and frightening all at the same time.
"There's a freedom in your arms that carries me through."
Ever since I met you, I've never felt alone, Inu Yasha. And I promise, you will never feel alone again, Kagome vowed silently.
"I need you."
As they slowly parted, she smiled timidly at him. His eyes danced with the unknown, and he pulled her to him once again and tenderly embraced her.
And he never wanted to let go.
"I need you like water, like breath, like rain.
I need you like mercy from Heaven's gate.
There's a freedom in your arms and it carries me through.
I need you."
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fin
