Twanny Bizzle here and do I got a surprise for you, it's a new story it's called The Origin of Flare Esquire, basically this story tells you how Flare became to be the Daisy obsess weirdo he is today, anyway I hope this story gives you a better understanding of Flare, now please enjoy the rest of the story. Please don't forget to leave a review when you get done reading this story, thank you very much.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Nintendo related, but I do own Flare the creepy Daisy obsess Fire Hammer Bros. and Aura, but I'm not telling you who she is… - my mouth is sealed shut.

The Origin of Flare Esquire.

Chapter 1: The Flare Menace

Bowser Jr. was inside Kammy's room as he watched her lie about herself while chatting with somebody on MySpace. "Kammy, you need to stop lying, you know damn well you ain't 19 years old, maybe 1900 years old."

Kammy then turned around smiling as she pinched Bowser Jr. on his cheeks. "Awww, that's so cute, you're jealous, don't worry Junior when you get older maybe I'll be interested in you."

Bowser Jr. then gripped as he slapped Kammy's hand off of him. "Whatever, you festering old hag, don't ever in your remaining life span put your hands on me." Bowser Jr. then smelled some burning. "Sniff…Sniff…Hey, what's that smell, it kinda smells like fried Koopa." Bowser Jr. then noticed that his cheek was smoking. "WHAT THE...HELL?!?!" Bowser Jr. then started running around Kammy's bedroom screaming. "AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" he then sped out the room and snarled loudly. "Kammy, you stinking bitch, ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!"


Kammy just shrugged as she sniffed her hand, she then noticed that the person she was talking to had sent a reply. "Oh goody, my friend's back." Kammy then read the message. "Hmmm, what am I wearing?!" Kammy smirked as she started typing back on the computer. "I'm wearing a yellow thong, with a yellow baby T." Kammy then pressed entered and watched her message get sent.

Dimentio who was Kammy's only MySpace friend had received her message. "Ooooo, that sound sexy, you're making me so horny, Kammy Koops." he then finished reading the rest of Kammy's sick message. "Hmmm, what am I wearing, Eheheh." he then muttered as he typed Kammy back a reply. "Well, I'm wearing white and black face paint while wearing a ridiculous jester outfit." he then pressed the entered button.

Kammy started giggling as she received his…Uh…Urm…Disturbing message. "Teheheheh, you're so crazy D-Jester, hm, what's this?!" she then noticed his PS on the bottom of his message. "Oh, so you want to see how I look like, huh?!" Kammy then looked around and found a camera. "This will do." she then took a picture of herself and faxed the picture of herself to Dinemtio's MySpace account. "There you go, my Demented Jester." she uttered as she kissed his Mr. Mime icon.

Dimentio smirked as he watched Kammy's picture come through his faxing machine. "Sweet, now I get to see how my dream girl looks like." he then swiped the picture and took a look. "…Wha, what the, WHAT IS THIS?!" Dimentio said as he stared at a picture of Kammy wearing a wet yellow baby T bend down showing her yellow thong while sucking on a yellow lollipop. "Oh, oh, oh, oh my god, she's HIDEOUS!!!!!!!!!" Dimentio then tried running to his bathroom, but he slipped on some magazine he had lying around on the floor and hit his head on his desk. "Gurp, I,…I don't think I can make it to the….BATHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Dimentio screeched as he vomited all over his room (You know, like that guy off of Crank Yankers), he then hit the ground. "My head..." he uttered as he slowly stood himself up. "Uh…Oh god, I feel so horrible, I can't believe I've been flirting with an old woman." he then slowly walked back over to his computer, gripping. "She lie to me, she told me that she was a female Koopa, but what did I receive in return, a picture of a leathery skinned crocodile sucking a lollipop."

Suddenly Dimentio's mom who name was Aura started hollering from upstairs. "Cornelius, are you okay, what's all that noise, I know you ain't up there looking at those nudie sites, again, I just clean your computer up this morning, don't make me have to block those sites again."

Dimentio then shouted. "Mother, I'm like 30 years old now, you can't keep trying to tell me what to do, and mother, I go by Dimentio now, not Cornelius." he then muttered under his breath. "I swear, she can be an idoit at times."

Aura then shouted back at her son. "Yes I can keep telling you what to do, if you're living in my house you've got to abide by my rules, and I said don't get on those nudie WEBSITES, and your name is Cornelius!!!!!!!!!"

Dimentio then sighed as he said. "Yes mother…" he then sat back down in his chair and stared at Kammy's…Uh…very, very, very, very, creepy picture. "Uhhh…I'm about to give this broad a piece of my…" but he interrupted himself as he started thinking out loud. "Hmmm, maybe I could you use this to my advantage." Dimentio smirked evilly. "I could use that decrepit old hag to form another Chaos Heart, but first I have to find her a suitable husband, because I know I'm not going near that disgusting freak of nature." he then started rubbing his chin. "I wonder where I could find Luigi…Hmmm?!"

Aura then shouted. "Cornelius, I know you ain't down there plotting world domination again, I already told you world domination don't put food on the table, what you really need to do is get out that basement and find a real job." she then muttered. "I wonder whatever happen to that nice Mr. L fellow you use to work for, now when you use to work for him you actually use to put food on the table."

Dimentio then muttered as he folded his arms. "Mr. L?!?!" Dimentio said with sheer disgust in his voice. "You know what mom, you can go to hell, bitch."

Aura then yelled back as she screamed from the top of her lung. "Oh yeah, Cornelius, how about you go and get your own place to stay, you ungraceful bastard."

Dimentio then quickly said. "Ok, ok, I'm sorry mommy, I was way outta line, please forgive me." he then uttered while giving an evil snicker. "It doesn't matter anyway, pretty soon even my own mother will be on her knees asking for forgiveness when I become the ruler of this realm." he then started doing his evil cackle. "Uhuuhuhuhuh!!!!!!" it sorted sound like that weird laugh Brian from Family Guy does when he gets drunk.

Aura then shouted again. "No evil cackling while you're still in the house."

Dimentio quietly chuckled as he picked up his phone. "I think it's time for me to make a phone call."


Meanwhile back inside the castle Flare was making a little redecorating. "Ah, this is great, Lord Bowser will love these posters of Princess Daisy." Flare murmured as he hung up more pictures of Daisy.

Red who was following behind Flare eating a box of Cracker Jacks. "Dude, I don't think you should be messing with Uncle B's Peach's posters, he's gonna be really mad when he finds out that you change them." he then looked at poster. "Who's the chick, anyway, she sorted looks like that Peach chick Uncle B drools over all the time."

Flare then snapped as he pushed Red out of his way. "Don't ever compare that, that, that woman with my beloved Princess Daisy." he then placed more posters on Bowser's wall. "It's so obvious that Daisy is better than Peach." Flare then said as he turned toward Red. "Awww, Daisy's voice is like a thousand of angels singing, her smile is like, oh god, it's like the morning sun, her body is like, uhhhh…I can't even explain it, it's so beautiful."

Red just stood there as he watched Flare swoon over Daisy. "Dude, you need to get a life." he then started staring at a Daisy poster. "Dude, I don't see what you and Uncle B sees in these human chicks, there so…weird looking, they don't even have shells, and how do you suppose to do the nasty with'em." he then smirked as he pulled a picture of Kylie Koopa out of his shell. "Dude, now Kylie, that's a woman, I mean she like second to me when it comes to hotness, and it takes a lot to become second to me in anything, I'm serious, dude, after me it's like an 114 gap between the next person who's as hot as me."

Flare sighed from frustration. "Kylie?!?! That's Kammy's great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great-granddaughter, can you imagine how she'll look like when she becomes Kammy's age, it's not a pretty sight I can tell you that."

Red snickered as he walked around Flare. "Dude, does it really matters, she's a babe now and when she does become that crusty old hag's age, I'll be out like a thief in the night." Red said as he gave Flare an egotistically smirk.

Flare rolled his eyes as he muttered. "You're just a simpleton, Red, you'll never understand what I'm trying to accomplish."

Red then folded his arms as he resorted. "I'm a simpleton?!?! Dude, you're the one who's gonna be the simpleton when Uncle B strangles you for changing his Peach posters."

Flare just huffed as he closed his eyes. "Please, Red, Lord Bowser already understand what I'm trying to do, unlike you, he's not a simpleton." he then smirked as he walked inside Bowser's throne room. "I'm pretty sure Lord Bowser already know that Daisy's the better woman, it's just a matter of time before he starts kidnapping her, instead of that skinny blonde woman."

Red just stood there shaking his head in disgust as he watched Flare hung up Daisy's posters in Bowser's throne room. "Dude, you're gonna regret doing this in the long run." Suddenly Bowser Jr. came out of nowhere and crashed in Red.

Bowser Jr. stood there rubbing his head, he then noticed Red on the ground. "Ow, watch where you're going, you idiot."

Red stood up, but he was doing it in slow motion as he gave Bowser Jr. his trademark thumbs up. "Duuuuuude!!!!!!!!" Bowser Jr. just stood there with an annoyed expression on his face. "What's the rush, Lil' B?!"

Bowser Jr. rolled his eyes, but he quickly noticed the Daisy posters all over his father's castle. "What the?!" he then read one of the posters. "Who or what in the hell is a DAISY?!" Bowser Jr. said in sheer disbelief. "Who did this, what happen to all my Papa's creepy Mama Peach pictures?!" he then stared at Red. "It was you wasn't it, you was the one who put these hideous, disgusting, horrible pictures up."

Red casually shook his head as he pointed in Bowser's throne room. "Dude, it wasn't me, it was Flare, and right now he's up in Uncle B's royal chambers putting up more Daisy poster." he then took a closer look at Bowser Jr. "Dude, do you know that your face is on like fire?!'

Bowser Jr. then felt his burning cheek and started back running. "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

Red stood there as he watched Bowser Jr. run outside. "Hmmm…I wonder how he didn't noticed that?" he then shrugged as he casually walked in the kitchen. "Oh well, the only thing I have to do now is wait for Uncle B to come back and totally thrash Flare."

Bowser Jr. ran until he jumped inside the outside water fountain. "Ahhhh…Much better." Bowser Jr. could hear someone groaning in the background. "Huh, what's that noise?!" Bowser Jr. turned around and saw his beat down Papa limping out of a time portal as he slowly walked toward his castle. "...Aw, snap..." Bowser Jr. gulped as he ran toward Bowser.

Chapter 1's over. Flare decided to redecorate Bowser's whole castle with pictures of Daisy, what will Bowser do when finally see the posters, and why was Bowser walking out a time portal? What about Dimentio, is he really gonna make a new Chaos Heart using Luigi and Kammy Koopa?! (Gross) Just stay tune for Chapter 2.