I looked up to the sky, and wished. I wished so hard I could brake glass. Kiddin'. No, I'm not.

My name is Lux, just Lux. Ok, Lux Cassidy, but what a name really. Lux Cassidy. What a name. Lux. Lux means light. Light means happiness. I was meant to bring happiness into the world. Yeah, like that ever happened.

I'm fifteen, seven foster homes later, record. In my state it actually is a record. I'm known to the social as 'the kid who can't be placed'. I have had so many case workers. The ones I can remember include: Nat, Alex, Dave, Cindy, Lee, Tracey and the latest one. Its like being shoved from one place to another, but instead its people. They talk about you as if you're not in the room, being my age, it hurts. You're not a kid anymore, you haven't been a kid in a while. Actually, growing up like me, you've never been a kid, yet you always get treated like one.

One question that gets stuck in my head though. My birth parents, who are they? What are they doing? I mean, Cassidy isn't much of a name to go by, its so popular. Take Cate Cassidy for example, she's the presenter of my favourite radio show, see how popular the name is? It's so frustrating. And being in different and to be honest, not the greatest foster homes in the world, I don't know how looking about for them. I don't want to be hurt again. Would you?

There's this weird thing Tash has been talking about, saying that if you get it then you can be your own self, no parents, no foster parents. Just you, out there. I mean, that would be brilliant. But I don't think Tash has fully thought about it. I mean, I would have to find my parents to do so, that's just ergh. And I would have to pay the bills and go to school. Get a job. Yeah, lifes tough at the moment. But how could I handle the stress of life. Cate is so right in that sense, if you don't know what you're doing properly, how can you do it? I don't really want to say this though to tash, she's my best friend and everything, and she hasn't had the greatest life either, but she's an optimistic, I'm a realistic. Shame really, I wish I could dream…

I have one dream, to meet my parents.

Listening to Cate and Ryan banter their lives out, I strolled down the road. I people watch, I don't listen to music. I don't have an MP3 player, plus most songs are about hope, and love. Neither of which I particularly have. So I have a personal radio instead, but Cate and Ryans show thank goodness doesn't have any music playing, and it's the only show I listen to. People watch is far more interesting, you can imagine their lives, go into another world with them, be part of their world. Watch them get coffee, work out who wears the trousers. I can't watch mothers with their children though, that hurts too much. Its about 6am, so I go into a local Maccy D's, its open 24/7. And thank goodness, its good to get away from screaming kids. Other kids that don't realise their fate isn't that their going to be adopted, but they'll move around from foster home to foster home as no-one wants them. All they want is there parents, and sometimes I just want to tell them that its not going to happen, but that's not for me to tell. That's for their case worker, I'm just the babysitter, the older kid, the kid they'll soon replicate. The people at Maccy D's already know me, so they smile as they watch me sit down. I don't order anything, when the nice guy Adam's in, he usually slips me a hash brown as I watch others enter the store, order their food, and then leave.

Cate and Ryan are bantering about children today, or specifically teenage parents. Strange topic to choose I suppose, and for some reason, Cate isn't speaking very much. Maybe it hit a raw nerve or something. She's the person I can relate to, she's like me, very realistic. Always looking at options in life. She's someone I admire. Someone I look up to, and she doesn't even realise how much of a friend she's been to me, she doesn't even know me. The beauty of radio.

I decide its enough of being in Maccy D's, the show has just ended and its gonna get busy in the store, so I wave good bye and leave. I decide to walk briskly, it's a Thursday, and that means it's the day I can get away with not being at school. The head teacher goes out on a Thursday, and the teachers use it to not teach. In a weird way, I kinda like school, I try, so I'm one of the best in the school. Its something to focus on; I'm not really into the whole drug thing, it just doesn't get me. At the same time though, the teachers hate us because the rest of the class don't work.

I decide, this is it. Today I'm going to the social, I'm going to find out my parents, just find out who they are…

Hi to start off with. I live in the UK, only 3 episodes in, and thank god I can find somewhere to put my ideas about this programme on, ITS AMAZING. Sorry just sayin' Also I don't know whats happening so this is my interpretation on a different way of going about Lux meeting them. Was originally going to be a one shot so it'll be a short story. I hope people review, because this would help me with writing and stuff. Plus none of my friends know about this programme. Not my fault its being shown on a Sunday night, and I found it on the UK programme catch up thing. It would be a massive help if someone could link me all the episodes. I wanna catch up with the rest of you. Lots of hugs and smiles.