The Queen with the Broken Heart
Pairing: Outlaw Queen
Rating: K+
Genre: Romance
Disclaimer: Once Upon a Time, Her Majesty Queen Regina, Robin Hood, and many of these characters belong to Disney/ABC, Adam Horowitz and Eddy Kitsis.
Summary: Set after 3x11 "Going Home", Snow White throws a holiday ball in the Enchanted Forest and a certain lonely, heartbroken queen meets her soul mate…
Author's Note: This is my Outlaw Queen debut, and I got the idea for it on Christmas Day 2013, then I started writing. I realize I'm posting this quite some time AFTER Christmas, but try to get in the holiday spirit - Christmas time is magical, and true love is also magic. I just ask that you go with the flow (considering the lovers haven't even met yet in canon!) and let Robin and Regina find each other; they will. Maybe it's for the best that I'm posting it this week - a story this romantic is also a perfect fit for Valentine's Day! Enjoy and please leave me a review. :)
Glittering snow blanketed the Enchanted Forest for the first time in nearly thirty years. The fairies said it was a welcome home to everyone who had been sent to Storybrooke and brought back with Peter Pan's new curse. No one was happy to be back, especially Snow White, Prince Charming, and Queen Regina. They had paid the worst price, and had been separated from Emma and Henry. To lift their spirits and to celebrate the holiday all together, Snow White decided to have a Christmas ball.
Regina really didn't want to go, and had nothing to celebrate without her son. She didn't feel welcome among her former enemies. But she decided to attend anyway. She imagined she'd have to hear about it from Snow White if she didn't go. The kingdom hadn't seen this kind of grand affair since the wedding of Snow White and her prince. Everyone was invited – royals and peasants, pirates and fairies, dwarves and well, everyone. Heroes and villains. The one rule was to keep the peace just for one night – Christmas Eve.
The carriage pulled up in front of Snow and Charming's castle. A footman opened the carriage door and held out his hand to help the lady step down. She took his hand, and the Queen stepped onto the cobblestone road, her skirt falling gracefully behind her. She patted her hair to make sure her bun and the sprig of holly were still pinned in place.
Her dress a deep forest green velvet, with black lace sleeves off the shoulder. She wore matching short black lace gloves. The same lace accented the corset around her waist, and the skirt hugged her hips and thighs before flaring out in a train behind her.
Regina glanced up at the castle and the fireworks exploding far above. She inhaled deeply, trying to work up the courage to enter the party. Who would really want her there? She would be much more comfortable spending the evening at her own palace, reading in front of the fireplace alone. The Queen sighed and walked up the palace staircase to the entrance hall, holding her skirts up as she took each step.
She passed another footman at the door, who crossed her name off the guest list.
"Presenting: Her Majesty Queen Regina," he announced over the ballroom. Everyone turned and bowed, but no one smiled at her. She could sense the tension in the air, and then everyone turned back to their own business. They were still afraid of her. Regina smiled to herself, and surveyed the room without making eye contact with individuals. There were couples waltzing in the middle of the floor, a live orchestra one side of the room, and a buffet of food and drinks against the back wall. Near the orchestra was a twelve foot tall Christmas tree, covered in glittering colorful ornaments and lights. Holly garland spiraled the handrails on the staircase, and holly and evergreen wreaths lined the golden marble walls.
Regina greeted no one, and instead crossed immediately to the refreshment table and took a glass of champagne. Perhaps if she had a few drinks, she'd enjoy this party more. She sipped her drink and stood off against the wall, watching the guests laugh, dance, and enjoyed their time together. Families and friends reunited for the first time since before the curse. Even Snow White and her prince seemed to be enjoying themselves. But they were eternal optimists, though, and probably still believed they could be reunited with Emma and Henry.
Regina, however, couldn't allow herself to dream of a reunion with her beloved son. She couldn't allow herself to believe she'd ever be happy. She would be alone forever, and this is what she deserved after all the evil she'd done. She would never see the one person she loved ever again. She took another sip of her drink. She would remain a wallflower and an outcast at this ball.
A man tucked his four year old son in bed in a guest room upstairs at the palace. It was kind of his old friend Snow White to think of him and invite him to their ball. He hadn't seen many of his allies and friends in nearly thirty years. He was one of the few who hadn't been transported to this Storybrooke he heard so much about. Truthfully, he wasn't bitter about the curse. He had twenty eight extra years with his wife, Marion, and the curse prolonged her life. His son remembered her, even though she died as the curse broke, when Roland was only two years old. They missed her less now, but Robin knew his son needed a mother figure in his life. But Robin was sure he'd never find anyone he could love like Marian, and there was no use thinking he could find love again. He should enjoy the ball and forget his loneliness, because it would never change. He had his son and that should be enough.
He kissed his son good night, and promised he'd be up to bed when the party was over.
"Goodnight, papa," Roland said. "This Christmas will be so nice! Waking up in the morning in a castle!"
Robin couldn't help but smile. His son always delighted in the little things. He admired him for that optimism and innocence. "It will be exciting." Anything was better than spending Christmas night in a tent in the forest, or at an inn with the Merry Men. "Goodnight, Roland."
He turned off the light, and closed the door behind him. He went down the stairs to rejoin the party. Robin wasn't one to attend parties, truthfully, but he was looking forward to seeing his old friends. It would take his mind off things; it seemed he always missed Marian more around holidays. He smiled when he saw Snow and Charming by the Christmas tree. He crossed the room to join them.
"Robin! I'm so glad you're here," Snow said, wrapping her arms around her old friend. He'd helped her once when she was on the run from the Queen, and he taught her how to shoot.
"Thank you for the invite," Robin replied. "It's quite a grand ball, if I may say so."
"Of course," Snow replied, linking arms with her husband again.
Robin glanced around, taking in the atmosphere. A woman caught his eye across the floor, by the refreshment table. Dark hair with a sprig of holly pinned in, deep red lips, and an emerald velvet dress, and the saddest expression he'd ever seen.
"Who's that?" Robin asked, unable to take his eyes off the stunningly beautiful, melancholy woman in green.
"Who?" Snow asked, and followed Robin's gaze. "Oh, her? That's Regina. She's the Queen. She was once my stepmother."
Oh, that Queen, Robin thought. The Evil Queen. The one who sent Snow on the run all those years ago. She didn't look so evil to him, or maybe it was just her beauty distracting him. "She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."
Snow smiled sadly and nodded.
"She looks so sad," Robin said.
"She has a broken heart. She had to leave her son behind when we were brought back here." Snow studied Robin. "She's not dangerous. Not anymore. No matter what you've heard about her. She's changed, and she's just lost. I thought it would be nice to include her. It might relieve her pain a little? But now, seeing her here, I'm not so sure."
Robin nodded, and kept staring as the Queen took another sip of her champagne. She hadn't noticed anyone watching her yet. He thought she must be infinitely more beautiful if she smiled. He made it his goal to make her smile somehow before the end of the night. He nodded to the princess and her husband, and crossed the ballroom, took a glass of wine from the refreshment table, and went up to her.
"Why is the most beautiful woman at the ball looking so sad?"
Regina raised her eyebrow and turned, surprised anyone was approaching her. "What is there to celebrate if the ones you love are gone forever?"
Robin nodded. "Yes, I'm sorry to hear that you had to leave your son, Your Majesty. But there is still hope, I'm sure." He smiled at her, hoping his optimism would help her feel better. "This ball is beautiful; surely the joyous atmosphere alone could help lift your spirits, my lady?"
But Regina shook her head. "I don't want to get my hopes up. And I do thank you for saying so, nonetheless." She nodded. "The ball is lovely, I will admit that. But I've never really enjoyed parties."
Robin grinned. "Me either. Especially a fancy ball like this. I feel a bit out of place here."
"As do I. I don't know why they invited me."
Robin shrugged. "Out of kindness, I expect." Regina huffed. "And for the record, my lady, I'm glad you're here. Who would I be talking to if you weren't here?"
Regina looked around. "I'm sure you could find someone to talk to."
"No one as lovely as you," Robin said. He realized he was shamelessly flirting with her, but he couldn't help himself. And if it made her smile, what harm did it do? "I'm Robin, by the way. Robin Hood." He reached out his hand and took hers. He kissed it and bowed.
"I'm Regina." But she supposed he already knew that.
"Would you honor me with a dance, Your Majesty?"
"I don't dance," she said, and tried to pull her hand away. He wouldn't let her go. Her eyes flashed with anger.
Instead, Robin pulled her close and took her in his arms. "I don't dance either, my lady."
The Queen rolled her eyes, about to ask why he'd insist on a dance if he couldn't either. It wasn't that she couldn't. She could dance very well. She learned as a young girl, and though she hated her lessons, she loved to practice the waltz in the stables with Daniel. It was the memory of twirling in his arms that made her never want to dance again. It was too sacred of a memory to waste a dance on any other man.
But it seemed Regina had no choice tonight, because she was wrapped in the arms of this very strange, yet kind and quite handsome man. She admitted to herself that dancing with this Robin Hood wasn't so bad. She let herself go, and began to enjoy herself. She twirled in his arms unexpectedly, and his eyes grew wide. She was magnificent! He continued to lead her around the floor – turning, twirling, a constant spin, arms out in graceful lines, and then he pulled her close again, his eyes locking with hers.
The song ended, and Robin dipped her back for the final pose, and then set her upright.
"Thank you," she said, clearing her throat. "That was…nice."
"It was very nice," Robin grinned. "Thank you for that honor, Your Majesty."
Regina gave a small smile, but Robin didn't count it. He wanted a real smile, a joyous grin, a beam, a smile that broke into laughter. The night was still young.
The Queen and Robin went back to the buffet table and grabbed two goblets of water and two scones on two crystal plates.
"So, Sir Robin, I feel like you know so much about me – that I'm Queen, that I lost my son…"
"I also that know you're beautiful, a wonderful dancer, and that you're fond of champagne."
Regina's cheeks flushed, and she gave that small smirk again. "All the more reason to know a little more about you." She knew only that he was called Robin Hood, and that he was handsome and kind, a decent dancer, and rather charming.
"Well then, my lady, I am an open book. Anything you'd like to know, I'll tell you. But first, I wasn't taken to your Storybrooke. Somehow my section of the Enchanted Forest was spared, though we were frozen in time for those twenty eight years. And my family and I lived happily."
"Family?"
"My wife Marian and my son." Her heart sank. The man had a wife. Not that she…liked him or anything. But now she felt guilty for dancing and flirting with a married man. "Actually, Your Majesty, I admit I am grateful for those twenty eight years. They kept my wife alive. She passed after the curse broke."
Regina frowned and reached for his hands, but then immediately let go out of embarrassment. "I am so sorry. I know your pain; I lost my love when I was very young. We never had a chance to marry."
"I'm so sorry about your loss, Regina. But Marian was sick for a long time, and now her suffering is over," Robin said. "We miss her, but it's been two years. It gets easier every day."
Regina nodded. "I am still so sorry."
He smiled at her. "But you – your curse – kept her alive. Roland remembers his mother because of that time. I thank you for unintentionally blessing us with more time."
Regina couldn't believe it. This man kept praising her, thanking her for the horrible curse. This was refreshing, but this kindness was undeserved. She shook her head. "Don't thank me, please," she said. She didn't deserve it. The curse was horrible. She was horrible. She should never forget who she was. "So, how is your son now?"
Robin smiled. "He's all I have. He's my reason for living. And he keeps me from going back to what I used to do – stealing. I was a thief, but I only stole from the rich to help the poor. But my boy, my Roland, made me want to be something better, more honorable and honest."
Regina understood. His love for his son sounded like her love for Henry. "You seem like an honorable thief. If you had to steal, at least it wasn't for personal gain and it was to help the less fortunate." Now she was the one praising a thief for his bad deeds.
The outlaw smiled. "That's what Marian always said." He paused. "Now my lady Regina, I know much, much less about you."He was flirting again, but now he was simply fascinated with her. There was much more to the famous, feared Evil Queen. But he couldn't possibly think of Regina as evil. Just lost and lonely.
Regina assured him that it was a long, tragic tale, but Robin insisted. So she told him about her childhood with Cora, about Daniel and his death, her horrible empty marriage to King Leopold. She explained that she only began using dark magic to learn to bring Daniel back, and when that failed, she had nothing left to live for – except magic, darkness, power, and revenge. Regina explained her motivation for wanting to kill Snow White, and for casting the curse.
"I never wanted to hurt anyone initially; I never wanted to be evil."
"You're not evil, my Queen, you just have a broken heart and it never healed."
The Queen nodded. "And still I can't regret all the horrible things I've done. The curse brought me my son, and he was…is…worth everything to me. He made me want to change and to be good again."
Robin nodded, set down his plate and his drink, and reached for both of her hands. He couldn't help but reach out to comfort her. This woman…this poor, broken, lost woman. She'd been through so much, and she'd lost everything and everyone. Robin's heart broke for her. Now he didn't just want to make her smile once, he wanted to make her happy. Truly happy. And now something about her made him want to stay here, to know her better, to be close to her, to hold her, to touch her. It was more than her beauty. He suddenly felt this attraction. Was he falling for her? Well, whatever he felt, he knew he cared for her.
"You're not evil," he said again. "You've changed so much. Even I can see that. You've redeemed yourself. You've saved your son numerous times and you saved a town full of your enemies. I believe that is enough, my lady. Your son forgave you and learned to love you. That's what matters most."
"Thank you." Regina gave that sad smile again.
Robin had a sudden idea. "Would you like to meet my son?" Regina loved her son so much; perhaps meeting another child would lift her spirits?
Regina's eyes grew wide and she looked around. "He's here?" She'd seen no children at the ball.
"Upstairs, sleeping in a guest room."
"Well, I don't think we should wake him."
Robin shook his head. "No, it's okay. He'd love to meet you. And I don't know when I'll see you again."
Regina agreed, but she was suddenly sad at the thought that this night would end, and eventually she and Robin would part ways. So he took her hand and led her up the stairs. Touching her hand seemed natural now. He smiled to himself. The thief and the queen – what an odd pair. He knocked on the guest room door and opened it.
"Roland, I have someone I want you to meet." Robin lit a candle on the bedside table, and they sat on either side of the bed. The little boy sat up, and rubbed his eyes.
"Is the party fun, papa?"
"It's very nice," Robin smiled. "This is my new friend Regina. She's a queen."
Regina glanced over at Robin. She hadn't expected him to call her a friend so soon. But she supposed if she had one friend, it would be him. She turned her attention back to the child.
"A queen! Wow!" the four year old exclaimed. "You are really pretty."
Regina grinned. "Well thank you, sweetheart. You're very cute."
Roland smiled wide and crawled into her lap. "And your dress is soft and pretty too."
The Queen laughed, and ran her hand over the velvet skirt. "Yes, it is. I'm quite fond of it. Thank you." She wrapped her arms around the little boy in her lap. He reminded her so much of Henry when he was smaller. She'd always had a soft spot for children anyway, and this one didn't seem to be afraid of her. She couldn't help but smile.
Robin was staring at her. She was infinitely more beautiful when she smiled.
"Do you live in this palace, Queen Regina?" Roland asked.
"No, I live far away from here. I'm just a party guest like you."
"Well, is your palace pretty like this one?"
She smiled again. "Yes, I think so," she said. "It's home to me at least."
"Can we visit sometime? I like pretty palaces and you're very nice."Regina laughed. The child was inviting himself to her palace? The thought of a child in her castle was actually quite ridiculous, but she couldn't help but grin at the thought.
Then she glanced up at the boy's father, her breath catching in her throat. If he…if they visited…it wouldn't be goodbye in the morning. She could see him again. "You may visit any time you like. I think I should like to have visitors. It's lonely there sometimes."
Roland nodded. "It's lonely with just me and Papa sometimes, too."
Regina hugged the child and kissed his forehead. And then she and Robin locked eyes. Something was stirring within her heart that she didn't understand. She realized how lonely her life was without Henry, but also how being with Robin tonight made it hurt less. She still missed him and she still loved him, but here with Robin and his adorable little boy she didn't feel so empty.
Robin watched her, trying to understand what she was thinking. She was still a mystery to him, but he wanted to help her and make her happy. Whatever this feeling was, he didn't want it to end. So he was grateful for his son suggesting they visit her. He knew he couldn't bear to say goodbye. Something was drawing him to her. Attraction? Of course. She was beautiful and intoxicating. But something else too. Could he possibly find the one thing he wished for – love – in her?
"Papa!" Roland's exclamation pulled Robin out of his thoughts. "You should marry her. You're looking at Regina the way you looked at Mama. Regina, oh please, will you be my new Mama? I think you'd be great! I like you and Papa likes you! And this way we could always be together!"
Regina pulled back and shook her head. This was not her intention. A million thoughts ran through her head. Marry him? She'd only just met him. She couldn't love him yet, could she? And no one possibly could love the Evil Queen. And she remembered the last little boy who told her she'd be a good mother. Owen. And look what happened there. "No, I couldn't, dear, I'm…sorry."
"Don't you love her?" Roland asked.
Robin was at a loss for words as well. "I…uh…I don't know." Yes, his heart told him. But it was so soon. Of course he wanted to be close to her, to be with her. And he couldn't help that somehow this was meant to be, like it was fate to find her here. But love took time. "I think you should go back to sleep, Roland, we'll discuss this tomorrow."
Roland nodded and yawned and crawled back under the covers. "Well goodnight, Queen Regina. It was nice to meet you. I hope I see you again soon."
Regina nodded. "Goodnight, sweetheart." She tucked in the child and kissed his forehead. And then she left the room, going as fast as she could in a tight velvet dress and heels down the stairs. She had to get away.
This was too much at once. First she'd danced with him – something she'd promised herself she'd only do with Daniel. Then she'd told him everything about herself, and he still didn't judge her. He hadn't left her side the whole night and he'd shown her nothing but kindness. He'd even praised her, thanked her for the curse. It was all ridiculous. She shouldn't be feeling this way. She shouldn't even be here. She should be at her palace away from celebrations and happiness. There was nothing to celebrate. She'd never be happy again unless her son was in her arms.
And yet, something about this man made her want to stay. Something about him was drawing her close. She couldn't regret coming to this ball somehow. Or else she wouldn't have met him. And meeting him…somehow felt right. He was the one, she could feel it. He could take the pain away, he could make her happy. But knowing this in her heart was exactly why she had to run.
"Regina," Robin called behind her. "Regina, please wait." He caught up with her at the bottom of the stairs. "I'm sorry if that shocked you. He's a child. He doesn't know any better. He says what he thinks and it's innocent. Please don't go."
"I know, it's not his fault," she said. Tears were welling up in her eyes. Why was she getting emotional over this? She desperately needed to keep her emotions in check. "He's sweet. He's a wonderful child. You should be very proud of him. Shelter him, protect him. Keep that innocence."
"I am…but Regina…"
"I have to go." She saw a servant. "Call my carriage, I am leaving."
"Goodbye, Robin. It was lovely to meet you. Thank you for, well, everything."
Robin reached for her, and that's when she saw it. A lion tattoo on his right wrist. She gasped. So that was why. That was why she felt this attraction to Robin. He was her soul mate. The one Tinkerbell said she was meant to be with. Her true love, her destiny. The one.
And she fought against destiny and fate once more, and ran.
Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed this! Part two will be posted soon. Please send me a review!
