1. In a far away land long, long ago
.
Fourth Age 531
Tauriel felt the magic slip over her skin as she passed into the familiar silence of the Elvenking's Halls.
She's the only elf in Eryn Lasgalen now, and perhaps the last elf in Middle Earth. For many years only she and the lords Celeborn, Elladan, and Elrohir remained. The Lord Celeborn had eventually chosen to sail, but Elladan and Elrohir hadn't left with him. It had been some time since she'd seen them, though. Several decades? Or had it been longer than that?
She tried to remember, then gave up with a minuscule shrug, continuing through the winding hallways to her chamber. The years ran together for her now, an indistinguishable blur of going out to fight and returning to the Halls to rest and resupply. And then the cycle began again, and again, with no end in sight.
And she's tired. She stripped away her filthy armor and left it on the floor, knowing that in the morning it would be clean and hanging in the cabinet where it belonged, and sank into the hot water of her bath.
The centuries had brought tremendous change to the lands of Middle Earth. The spiders and goblins are long eradicated, and the orcs nearly so. The Greenwood is once again deserving of its name, verdant and glorious, the sun reaching down to the forest floor.
Yet the trees are silent now. They no longer hear her voice or murmur in return.
And still there is evil in the world. The years following the War of the Ring were such hopeful ones, but it had rapidly become obvious that the dominion of Men came hand in hand with the evil of Men.
No matter what she does, no matter how hard she fights, there is no end to evil.
She's so tired.
The rapidly cooling water of her bath made her shiver, so she drained it and dressed in her softest, most comfortable gown, then sat to comb out her hair.
King Thranduil knew that she wouldn't leave. (Why should she? There is nothing in the Undying Lands for her.) Whether from guilt, pity, or affection she didn't know, but before he sailed he enchanted the Halls. Everything in them stayed in a perfect state of preservation, and only someone who had been inside them before would be able to see them.
She is the only one left who can. Even Legolas eventually sailed, leaving centuries ago with his boon companion, Gimli.
The comb creaked, threatening to snap in her grip, so she carefully laid it down and began to walk.
Gimli, who had been too young to join the company of Thorin Oakenshield with his father Gloin. He'd told her stories of his youth, wonderful stories of childhood games with his cousins Fili and Kili, of how he'd trailed after them until they'd deemed him old enough to play with, how he and Kili admired Fili's calm demeanor even as they plotted to prank him out of it, how Kili could make anyone laugh and how he'd worked to perfect an expression of wide-eyed innocence to get himself out of trouble.
She'd seen glimpses of Kili's humor and Fili's steadiness in him, and a faded grief at lives cut too short. There had been times she wanted to flee from him even as she craved every memory he had.
Gimli did not follow his cousins into an early death. Indeed, when she first met him he was already older than they ever were. He survived the mighty battles he fought and lived to a venerable old age.
And may have been allowed to join Legolas in the Undying Lands.
Her hand tightened around the runestone in her pocket. She wished clawing at her chest would do something, anything, to relieve the agony in it.
She knew it wouldn't. Her hand remained in her pocket.
Almost against her will, her feet began to lead her to the dungeons.
She has fought and fought and nearly succeeded in her mission to eradicate the old evils of the world, though clearly she cannot win the battle against evil itself. She has no way left to sail, nor any desire to. She has no true desire to continue the mindless cycle her life has become, but what else is there for her? She is of a race that has begun to pass into legend and myth, and it is becoming unsafe to even be seen by mortals. Would she eventually be forced to spend the ages until Dagor Dagorath hidden here in the Elvenking's Halls?
She had sometimes felt imprisoned here, back when the Greenwood was Mirkwood. Would it truly now become her prison?
Her feet stopped walking, and it was absolutely no surprise to realize she was standing in the doorway of Kili's cell. She always ended up here sooner or later.
She closed her eyes, remembering his expression as he told her about the fire moon, and the glint in his eyes as he teased her about his runestone being cursed. "Your mother was right, mell nin," she murmured. "You were reckless." And charming, and oh, so brave.
Braver than she had been. "I'm not afraid," he'd told her, standing on the shore with death and fear and grief all around them, and he truly hadn't been. She had been the one who was afraid to say what she really felt and do what she really wanted to do, until it was all too late and she was left with nothing but the runestone he'd pressed into her hand.
How would things have changed if she'd gone with him that day?
She tried not to let herself think about such things.
Exhaustion both mental and physical pressed down on her and she leaned her shoulder against the doorway. She looked down, watching her thumb repeatedly slide over the runestone in her hand. She would have to be more careful—the edges of the runes were beginning to soften from handling.
He'd called her something that day on the shore of the lake. She'd told him she didn't know what he meant, and that was true, in a sense. She didn't know what he said or its exact translation. But even so, she knew what he had meant, she had known it then, and she wished with everything in her that she had been as courageous as he was.
She gave in to her weariness and sat down on the floor, resting her head on the carved ledge where he had once sat and teased her.
"Keep it. As a promise," he'd said.
If only it had been a promise he'd been able to keep.
She fell asleep filled with longing, and never noticed when her fea left in search of him.
.
In a not so far away land not so very long ago...
Thorin stormed into his sister's office, the door slamming back against the wall.
"Yes," Dis mused dispassionately, "I am glad I moved that picture." Her gaze moved to her quaking student. "Go on, Ori, I'll see you tomorrow."
Ori squeaked unintelligibly and bolted out the door, and Dis sighed, the picture of mildly irritated longsuffering. "Really, Thorin, can you refrain from terrifying my doctoral candidates?"
Thorin merely glared at her, his chest heaving.
"Your meeting with Dr. Grey went that well, did it?"
"Gandalf Grey is a menace," Thorin bit out.
Dis looked amused. "Still insisting you search for the Elvenking's Halls, is he?"
Her brother, predictably, started pacing like a caged lion. "There is nothing left of Eryn Lasgalen! You know I loathe Masters, but he's not a terrible archaeologist and he's spent the last decade looking for it— if there was anything there he would have found it!" He whirled and pointed an accusing finger at his sister. "And you! Don't think I don't know that's why you've decided not to come with us this summer!"
"Is it so strange that I should decide to teach during the summer session?" she asked mildly. "I've done so the last two years, after all."
"You always come with us on digs," he grumbled mulishly, dropping into Ori's hastily vacated chair. "You just don't want to spend the summer wandering around in the woods."
"I can't say it has much appeal," she agreed dryly, then threw her pen at him. "Oh, stop growling! Look at it this way, if you don't find anything you can go look for something else next summer. And it's not like you're footing the bill for any of this. It'll be a nice, all expenses paid, summer vacation." She grinned evilly. "In the woods."
There was a long pause before Thorin proclaimed, "I hate you."
His supposedly-loving little sister laughed at him and he slumped further down into his chair. "I should have just agreed to go to Erebor like he wanted me to—this whole Eryn Lasgalen mess is probably just his revenge. But really, Dis! Even if Dale didn't almost completely surround it, leaving no chance whatever for secrecy, there's no way into that mountain!"
Dis nodded sagely, as though she hadn't already heard this argument a thousand times over the past several years. "Clearly, he just wants to waste your time— and his money— by sending you on wild goose chases." She laughed at the terrible face he made at her. "Did you at least find out who's going to be on the team?"
"The boys, of course," he said, referring to her sons, who were so far from being children that it really was laughable to refer to them as boys. Not that their actual ages would ever stop him. "And Sigrid— he says he expects us to find textiles and we'll need her on site, but he also spouted some rubbish about not wanting to 'separate two young people so newly married' so that's probably his real reason."
He sounded thoroughly disgusted and Dis snorted. "Your compassion for young lovers overwhelms me."
"Yeah, well, they can keep the romance to themselves. We'll be there to work."
"On nothing," his sister pointed out blithely, completely unimpressed by his scowl.
"It's still work, regardless," he snapped. "Oh, and he saddled us with some man I don't know, some linguist; I forget his name. He's new to the faculty here."
"Not Dr. Baggins? I met him earlier today; he's adorable."
"'Adorable,'" Thorin repeated with distaste. "That's just wonderful. I'm going to spend a pointless summer in the woods with the lovebirds, some man you find adorable, and Kili, while you sit back here in comfort and laugh at me. Shut up. At least wait till I leave to laugh."
"Don't forget to write!" she managed to get out, before she was laughing too hard to speak.
A/N:
mell nin: my beloved
fea: soul, or spirit
Written for this year's Hobbit Big Bang and cross-posted on Ao3. All chapter titles from Disney's Sleeping Beauty- this one is from the opening sequence. I'd planned to base this on the earliest Sleeping Beauty tales, but then I read them and changed my mind. (Raped while unconscious then waking up while in labor with the product of said rape, anyone? No? o_O Seriously, holy crap.) Regarding Tauriel's fea leaving her: I read a description of elves fading due to lost love that described it that way, that their fea would leave and search the world for the loved one. Not sure if that was really Tolkien's idea, but it gave me the idea for this. In case it isn't already obvious, this story doesn't cling closely to canon, especially where magical capabilities and the Undying Lands are concerned. This is fully written and the next chapter will be up tonight or tomorrow. Hope you enjoy!
(Here are my Ao3 tags, in case you want more info about the story: fairy tale elements; reincarnation; some angst because Thorin; he and Bilbo blindsided me tbh; modern AU; archaeology AU; ace!bagginshield; at least that's how I picture them but ymmv; newlywed Fili/Sigrid; Gandalf is a troll; and they all lived happily ever after.)
