Putting pen to paper was always the shittiest part of writing. How do I start this sentence? With a name is the answer. Damon was the problem. He was smart, witty, gorgeous, and in love with me. So what was the problem? I was dating his brother as I had been for the past three years. Stefan and I had been together since sophmore year of high school. Damon and I met when Damon came home for the holidays from his first year at college and that is when we met.

Damon was a nice guy and I had an epic crush on him but I couldn't let my life become a soap opera by going after my boyfriends brother. So I did what any self respecting girl would do, I fantasized about him as often as I could and I tried to prolong the moment before Stefan wanted to have sex because it would be terrible if during my first time I called out his brother's name.

But there was only so much prolonging that could be done and when the deed was done I was so relieved that Damon's name had not spilled from my lips even though my eyes had been closed picturing Stefan as him. Yes I'm horrible. I should have broken up with Stefan but the thing was, I wasn't in love with Damon, I was merely in love with his body. Shallow as that may seem it was the truth. I didn't know about love I was 18 and how could I love a guy a barely knew?

I was going off to college in five weeks and Stefan and I had decided to breakup. He was going to Stanford, in California, and I would be going to an all-women's college in Massachusetts. We had both come to the conclusion that a long distance relationship wouldn't work so we decided to stay friends, help each other pack for college, and say goodbye for now. I was off to college and so excited. But I was slightly terrified of whether I could handle only being around girls. Luckily Damon went to a college 30 minutes from mine. Funny how things work out, right?