Disclaimer: I want to own them, but I don't. The Goddess formerly known as
J.K Rowling does.
A/N OK, well this all stemmed from a dream I had. And this dream would NOT leave my head! So, to appease the dream God's I set to writing this out! I can only hope you all find it even a little funny hehehe. Enjoy it (yay) or hate it (aww) either way it's finally out of my head haha! By the way, this is done in 'play' format. Okey Dokey? Also, good background music is the Theme Song for "The Dating Game" ha!
The Dating Game! Hogwarts Style By: Gum Acacia
Host: Hello! And welcome to another exciting edition of 'The Dating Game!' I'm your host Lee Jordan! And today we have a plethora of potential victims...er...I mean contestants for you! So, on we go and let's meet today's first vic- eh heh heh...contestant!
[Incredibly cheesy music starts to play. Our host is posted ever vigilantly at his podium. The stage begins to turn, lights begin to flash and we catch a glimpse of today's first guest]
Host: All the way from Godric's Hollow, It's none other than 'The Boy who Lived' Harry Potter!
[Audience proceeds to scream their ruddy heads off. Three women are carried off on stretchers; four men are restrained to their seats. One man in a black cloak goes unnoticed by all the rest, he watches Harry ominously.]
Host: Harry is currently working for The Ministry of Magic as an Auror.
Audience: Ohhhhh. Awwwwww.
Host: He likes to take long walks on the beach, he enjoys flying on his FireBolt 5000, and every year he vanquishes at least one threat to the wizarding world! What a man!
Audience: YAAAAAAAAY!
Host: So, Harry are you ready? What shall it be, Witches or Wizards?
[Harry turns a very bright shade of red as the Audience cheers for both.]
Harry: Uhh, I think I'll take Witches, Lee.
Audience: Boooooooo!
Host: For our first Witch how about a blast from your past, your very first date from your very first Yule Ball! Everyone let's hear it for Miss. Parvati Patil! Parvati is the new Divination Professor for Hogwarts; she enjoys cooking treacle fudge and de-gnoming her garden. What a gal! Say hello to Harry Miss. Patil.
Parvati: Hello, Harry.
Host: Our second Witch is sure to be a surprise! It's his best friends kid sister, Miss. Virginia Weasley! Better known as Ginny to all her friends, Miss. Weasley currently works for her two older brothers as Head of the Complaints Department for 'Weasley Wizard Wheezes.' Though, I can't imagine what they would have complaints against. Their new disappearing cauldrons are sure to be a hit with Potions Masters everywhere! Ginny, why don't you say hello to Harry.
Ginny: squeak
Host: All right, we'll take that as a hello! Our last Witch has been an employee for Hogwarts since 1969, give a warm round of applause for Miss. Minerva McGonagall! How have you been Professor? Wait a tic? Who is that? That's not McGonagall!
[Security guards swarm the stage; the false Minerva is wearing a wig! It is removed and the crowd gasps. The man in the cloak still leers, unseen, at Harry.]
Host: Draco Malfoy! What are you doing dressed up like Professor McGonagall?
Draco: It's not fair! Why do only Witches get a crack at him?
Host: I'm sorry Draco, but since you are a contestant in our next round, you're not eligible to be one of Harry's picks. Security, would you please take him away and bring out the real McGonagall?
[Draco is hauled away kicking; the real McGonagall takes her seat. Harry by now, looks as though he is turning a lovely shade of Slytherin Green.]
Host: Well, now that *that's* all taken care of, we can get on with the show! Harry, you'll have three questions to ask each of the ladies, then you can make your choice! And to keep things totally unbiased on your part, we're gonna mix things up!
[A giant divider screen pops up between our contestant and his ladies. The Witches are put in different order and given vocal charms to hide their real voices! Witch Number one is Ginny, number two is McGonagall and three is Miss. Parvati Patil!]
Host: All right Harry! It's time to ask your first question. Please stick to the questions that have been pre-selected for you.
[Incredibly cheesy music starts again]
Harry: Uhh, Witch Number three, If I were a rampaging Hippogriff, how would you sooth me?
Parvati: Well, Harry...
[What sounds like the voice of Rubeus Hagrid booms through the air]
Parvati: ...first, I'd walk up to you very so slowly. And then, I'd calmly place my hand on your neck, and begin to stroke it ever so softly. Before long, you'd be putty it my hands!
Host: Well, I think it will be a long time before we can disassociate that answer with that voice. Memory charms will be available for anyone who thinks they might be traumatized.
Harry: Witch number one, same question.
Ginny: squeak Umm, I'd...
[The voice of Griphook the Goblin squeaks out, and it is all our host can do to keep from doubling up on the floor in laughter]
Ginny: I would use a disarming charm on you, then I would turn you back into a man, because I don't think it's legal for Hippogriffs to play Quidditch.
Host: Well, a Witch who obviously puts Quidditch at the top of her list! Well done! Harry, why don't you ask out last Witch?
Harry: Witch number two?
Minerva: Well, Harry...
[The audience bursts into tear filled laughter as the voice of a mountain troll echo's throughout the studio.]
Minerva: First, I'd put something a little more comfortable, maybe this pink nighty I've been waiting to use. Then, I'd put on some soft music, light a few candles...and then take fifteen points from Gryffindor for use of an ILLEGAL TRANSFIGURATION SPELL!
Host: Ok, I think we're going to need to charm that last bit from Harry. Ladies I'll remind you, not to give too much of your identities away. And would someone please charm me as well, I don't think I can continue my duties as host with 'pink nightys' in my head!
[A quick batch of memory charms are handed out, and our figure in black continues to be a mystery.]
Host: Well, Harry are you ready for question two?
Harry: Witches one, two and three. Being and Auror, I sometimes come home from work with a few bumps and bruises. How would take care of me, if I can home one night thoroughly roughed up?
Ginny: Well, I think I'd use a quick healing spell, and then I'd make you some soup.
Audience: Awwwwwwwww.
Minerva: Well, first I'd slip into that pink nighty of mine, and then I'd brew you a pepper up potion. It would be a shame to waste that steam being built up inside you, so after that I think we'd-
Host: For the sake of all our audience members, I'm not going to allow you to finish that sentence. I don't think there's a memory charm strong enough to wipe out that kind of damage. Witch number three, why don't you continue.
Parvati: Well, I think I'd draw you a nice bath. And then of course, I'd give you a quick healing spell and put you directly to bed. But I think you'd deserve a good spanking for being such a naughty boy!
Host: Whoa! Witch number three, please remember we have younger viewers at home. And also just for the record, sometimes hosts are very naughty boys. We need a good spanking all the time!
[The audience responds in a very Jerry Springer like fashion, security rushes to protect the stage.]
Audience: Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
Host: Thank you everyone! Harry, it's time for your last question, and then you'll need to make your choice!
Harry: I can't ask this question!
Host: Harry, I'm afraid you'll have to, or we'll use the Tikalus curse on you.
Harry: But...But...
Host: Come on chap, it's in the waver you signed!
Harry: Oh all right! Being an avid Quidditch player, I really put my 'broom' through a beating sometimes. After a particularly hard workout...what would you...I can't ask that!
Host: All right Harry, get ready for Tikalus then.
[Lee raises his wand and points it at Harry]
Harry: All right! What would you do to-get-my-broomstick-in-top- condition.
Audience Member: I bet I can get your broomstick in working order!
Host: Now, now everyone. Lets' let the ladies take this one. Witch Number one?
Ginny: I...I...I...His broom...I...I...thud
Host: Will someone please pick up Witch number one and put her back on her chair. It seems she's passed out. Oh well, Witch number two?
Minerva: Well, first of I'd put on my pink nighty...And then I'd take some nice course sand paper and scrape of at least a half inch of your broom. Then I'd pull out all the twigs, and cut them down till their all the same size. Then I'd shove them back in, and then I'd whack your broom against a tree as hard as I can to make sure it's still good.
[The audience is completely silent, in the distance the sound of a lone cricket can be heard.]
Host: Well, Witch number two, thank you for that lovely answer. Harry mate, I'd say a heads up to that one. I'm not so sure she *wasn't* altogether aware of that double meaning. Witch number three, why don't we have your answer. And then you can have my address.
Audience: Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
Parvati: Well, Harry, I'd say the only way to help your broomstick would be to take care of it. every. single. day. I wouldn't let a day go by without giving it a good polish.
Host: Well that settles it. Contestant three is withdrawn from eligibility. I'm sorry Harry. And Witch three, you can meet me later for some butter beer. So, it's either witch one or with two, Harry. Who's it going to be?
[Before Harry can answer there is a loud explosion and smoke fills the air. The man in the black cloak finally makes himself known. It is none other than Lord Voldemort himself!]
Host: Well! This *is* a surprise! We thought you were dead! Harry, didn't you say you vanquished him?
Harry: Uhhh, I thought I did.
Voldemort: You thought you could get rid of me did you? HA! Never! You'll never be rid of me. I'll always be behind you, waiting to pounce.
Host: Well Mr. Mort. Or should we call you Voldie?
Voldemort: It is Voldemort or the Dark Lord thank you very much!
Host: Whatever! If you want to do any 'pouncing' on Harry, I'm sorry you'll have to get in line. He's about to pick his dream Witch, if you don't mind.
Voldemort: YOU'LL NEVER BE RID OF ME!
Host: Harry, would you hurry up and vanquish him, we have another show to tape today.
[There is a large scuffle as Harry and Voldemort fight. Somehow in the process, Harry's shirt is ripped from his body. And like a moth to a flame, Draco finds himself back on stage]
Draco: What's going on? Oh my! Harry, you're practically naked!
Harry: Yes, thank you for pointing that out Malfoy, but I'm just a bit busy here, trying to vanquish the Dark Lord once again!
Draco: (Barley Audible) Would you look at those rippling muscles.
[The fight continues on, suddenly the room is filled with dozens of Aurors, Dumbledore is in the lead. They continue to fight, and with the addition of the extra Wizards, they are able to subdue and defeat Voldemort]
Voldemort: You'll never be rid of me, never!
[One of the Aurors floats Voldemort out of the studio, the audience bursts into applause]
Dumbledore: We apologize for this interruption, but we knew if Harry were to pose as a contestant on this show, it would draw out the Dark Lord from his hiding place...I'm just so sorry that...wait a tic...Professor McGonagall! What are you doing here? And in your underwear!
[McGonagall who had just finished changing into Lee Jordan's nightmare nighty, made her way over to Dumbledore]
Minerva: Well, Albus. I'm not getting any younger, and I thought I'd better try this since the personal ads rejected my letter once again.
Dumbledore: I've never seen you look so...so...so ravishing.
Minerva: Oh Albus do you think so?
Dumbledore: I don't think I can contain myself any longer, I must have you!
[Dumbledore and McGonagall are ushered out of the studio tangled in each other's limbs. Their loud kissing can be heard from backstage.]
Host: Well, we apologize for that scene. If anyone feels they need more then a memory charm to rid themselves of the Headmaster and the Professor groping...we will be passing out some fire whiskey after the show. Again, our sincerest apologies. Well, Harry it looks as though you get to choose between Witch number one, and uhh, Witch number one! Who shall it be?
Harry: I guess, Witch number one.
Host: Well, hold onto to your socks Harry, because you've just won yourself a tropical vacation for two with Miss Virginia Weasley! You'll be staying for three nights and four days at the fabulous Wizarding resort 'Merlin's Mirage' in Tahiti! There you'll find your days filled with adventure and your nights filled with...Oh, I'm sorry Harry, looking at my notes it seems that by order of ever male Weasley your nights will be filled with platonic hand shakes and two separate bedrooms. Tough luck mate!
[Audience bellows with laughter, Ginny is finally revived and immediately passes out again after being told she has won. Draco, unnoticed by all, sneaks back onto the stage.]
Harry: Mrhm...Flifh....Muad....Smersh.
Draco: Mhhhh
Harry: Malfoy! You just kissed me!
Draco: Yes I did, and you noticed!
Harry: Would you kindly take your hands off my bum!
Audience: Boooooooooooo!
Host: Well, it seems that our Mr. Malfoy can not contain himself when he's around you Harry. What do you say, mate? Want to take him with you?
Harry: Have you all gone mad? He's a man!
Host: Well, Draco it seems you're out of luck. But never fear! We've got three Wizards who are just dying to get themselves a little bit of that Malfoy Loving!
[Audience goes hysterical. Harry rushes off to hide behind Lee, protecting himself from Draco's wandering hands.]
Host: Well, we hope you all enjoyed today's show, and as soon as our winning Witch wakes up, we'll send these two on their way! Join us next time for 'The Dating Game!'
Announcer: All contestants receive a years supply of Chocolate Frogs and Bonko's Better Butter Beer! Better then before, more buttery then ever! All contestants must agree to the Official rules and be free of any curses at time of taping including Imperius and any other choice inhibiting potions or spells. Copyright 2002, Prey-Dupe Enterprises.
~~~~~ A/N:
Ok, that was totally dorky and I know it lol! But it was a lot of fun for me to do, because I normally don't write things like this. I have every intention of writing a second fic with Draco as our next Victim (let's be honest they are!)
If you would like to vote on who should be next in the victims chair...Feel free to just click review. It's that button right down there! HAHA!
Thank you to the dream God's or who ever put this idea in my head. I hope tonight I'll be able to sleep!
A/N OK, well this all stemmed from a dream I had. And this dream would NOT leave my head! So, to appease the dream God's I set to writing this out! I can only hope you all find it even a little funny hehehe. Enjoy it (yay) or hate it (aww) either way it's finally out of my head haha! By the way, this is done in 'play' format. Okey Dokey? Also, good background music is the Theme Song for "The Dating Game" ha!
The Dating Game! Hogwarts Style By: Gum Acacia
Host: Hello! And welcome to another exciting edition of 'The Dating Game!' I'm your host Lee Jordan! And today we have a plethora of potential victims...er...I mean contestants for you! So, on we go and let's meet today's first vic- eh heh heh...contestant!
[Incredibly cheesy music starts to play. Our host is posted ever vigilantly at his podium. The stage begins to turn, lights begin to flash and we catch a glimpse of today's first guest]
Host: All the way from Godric's Hollow, It's none other than 'The Boy who Lived' Harry Potter!
[Audience proceeds to scream their ruddy heads off. Three women are carried off on stretchers; four men are restrained to their seats. One man in a black cloak goes unnoticed by all the rest, he watches Harry ominously.]
Host: Harry is currently working for The Ministry of Magic as an Auror.
Audience: Ohhhhh. Awwwwww.
Host: He likes to take long walks on the beach, he enjoys flying on his FireBolt 5000, and every year he vanquishes at least one threat to the wizarding world! What a man!
Audience: YAAAAAAAAY!
Host: So, Harry are you ready? What shall it be, Witches or Wizards?
[Harry turns a very bright shade of red as the Audience cheers for both.]
Harry: Uhh, I think I'll take Witches, Lee.
Audience: Boooooooo!
Host: For our first Witch how about a blast from your past, your very first date from your very first Yule Ball! Everyone let's hear it for Miss. Parvati Patil! Parvati is the new Divination Professor for Hogwarts; she enjoys cooking treacle fudge and de-gnoming her garden. What a gal! Say hello to Harry Miss. Patil.
Parvati: Hello, Harry.
Host: Our second Witch is sure to be a surprise! It's his best friends kid sister, Miss. Virginia Weasley! Better known as Ginny to all her friends, Miss. Weasley currently works for her two older brothers as Head of the Complaints Department for 'Weasley Wizard Wheezes.' Though, I can't imagine what they would have complaints against. Their new disappearing cauldrons are sure to be a hit with Potions Masters everywhere! Ginny, why don't you say hello to Harry.
Ginny: squeak
Host: All right, we'll take that as a hello! Our last Witch has been an employee for Hogwarts since 1969, give a warm round of applause for Miss. Minerva McGonagall! How have you been Professor? Wait a tic? Who is that? That's not McGonagall!
[Security guards swarm the stage; the false Minerva is wearing a wig! It is removed and the crowd gasps. The man in the cloak still leers, unseen, at Harry.]
Host: Draco Malfoy! What are you doing dressed up like Professor McGonagall?
Draco: It's not fair! Why do only Witches get a crack at him?
Host: I'm sorry Draco, but since you are a contestant in our next round, you're not eligible to be one of Harry's picks. Security, would you please take him away and bring out the real McGonagall?
[Draco is hauled away kicking; the real McGonagall takes her seat. Harry by now, looks as though he is turning a lovely shade of Slytherin Green.]
Host: Well, now that *that's* all taken care of, we can get on with the show! Harry, you'll have three questions to ask each of the ladies, then you can make your choice! And to keep things totally unbiased on your part, we're gonna mix things up!
[A giant divider screen pops up between our contestant and his ladies. The Witches are put in different order and given vocal charms to hide their real voices! Witch Number one is Ginny, number two is McGonagall and three is Miss. Parvati Patil!]
Host: All right Harry! It's time to ask your first question. Please stick to the questions that have been pre-selected for you.
[Incredibly cheesy music starts again]
Harry: Uhh, Witch Number three, If I were a rampaging Hippogriff, how would you sooth me?
Parvati: Well, Harry...
[What sounds like the voice of Rubeus Hagrid booms through the air]
Parvati: ...first, I'd walk up to you very so slowly. And then, I'd calmly place my hand on your neck, and begin to stroke it ever so softly. Before long, you'd be putty it my hands!
Host: Well, I think it will be a long time before we can disassociate that answer with that voice. Memory charms will be available for anyone who thinks they might be traumatized.
Harry: Witch number one, same question.
Ginny: squeak Umm, I'd...
[The voice of Griphook the Goblin squeaks out, and it is all our host can do to keep from doubling up on the floor in laughter]
Ginny: I would use a disarming charm on you, then I would turn you back into a man, because I don't think it's legal for Hippogriffs to play Quidditch.
Host: Well, a Witch who obviously puts Quidditch at the top of her list! Well done! Harry, why don't you ask out last Witch?
Harry: Witch number two?
Minerva: Well, Harry...
[The audience bursts into tear filled laughter as the voice of a mountain troll echo's throughout the studio.]
Minerva: First, I'd put something a little more comfortable, maybe this pink nighty I've been waiting to use. Then, I'd put on some soft music, light a few candles...and then take fifteen points from Gryffindor for use of an ILLEGAL TRANSFIGURATION SPELL!
Host: Ok, I think we're going to need to charm that last bit from Harry. Ladies I'll remind you, not to give too much of your identities away. And would someone please charm me as well, I don't think I can continue my duties as host with 'pink nightys' in my head!
[A quick batch of memory charms are handed out, and our figure in black continues to be a mystery.]
Host: Well, Harry are you ready for question two?
Harry: Witches one, two and three. Being and Auror, I sometimes come home from work with a few bumps and bruises. How would take care of me, if I can home one night thoroughly roughed up?
Ginny: Well, I think I'd use a quick healing spell, and then I'd make you some soup.
Audience: Awwwwwwwww.
Minerva: Well, first I'd slip into that pink nighty of mine, and then I'd brew you a pepper up potion. It would be a shame to waste that steam being built up inside you, so after that I think we'd-
Host: For the sake of all our audience members, I'm not going to allow you to finish that sentence. I don't think there's a memory charm strong enough to wipe out that kind of damage. Witch number three, why don't you continue.
Parvati: Well, I think I'd draw you a nice bath. And then of course, I'd give you a quick healing spell and put you directly to bed. But I think you'd deserve a good spanking for being such a naughty boy!
Host: Whoa! Witch number three, please remember we have younger viewers at home. And also just for the record, sometimes hosts are very naughty boys. We need a good spanking all the time!
[The audience responds in a very Jerry Springer like fashion, security rushes to protect the stage.]
Audience: Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
Host: Thank you everyone! Harry, it's time for your last question, and then you'll need to make your choice!
Harry: I can't ask this question!
Host: Harry, I'm afraid you'll have to, or we'll use the Tikalus curse on you.
Harry: But...But...
Host: Come on chap, it's in the waver you signed!
Harry: Oh all right! Being an avid Quidditch player, I really put my 'broom' through a beating sometimes. After a particularly hard workout...what would you...I can't ask that!
Host: All right Harry, get ready for Tikalus then.
[Lee raises his wand and points it at Harry]
Harry: All right! What would you do to-get-my-broomstick-in-top- condition.
Audience Member: I bet I can get your broomstick in working order!
Host: Now, now everyone. Lets' let the ladies take this one. Witch Number one?
Ginny: I...I...I...His broom...I...I...thud
Host: Will someone please pick up Witch number one and put her back on her chair. It seems she's passed out. Oh well, Witch number two?
Minerva: Well, first of I'd put on my pink nighty...And then I'd take some nice course sand paper and scrape of at least a half inch of your broom. Then I'd pull out all the twigs, and cut them down till their all the same size. Then I'd shove them back in, and then I'd whack your broom against a tree as hard as I can to make sure it's still good.
[The audience is completely silent, in the distance the sound of a lone cricket can be heard.]
Host: Well, Witch number two, thank you for that lovely answer. Harry mate, I'd say a heads up to that one. I'm not so sure she *wasn't* altogether aware of that double meaning. Witch number three, why don't we have your answer. And then you can have my address.
Audience: Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
Parvati: Well, Harry, I'd say the only way to help your broomstick would be to take care of it. every. single. day. I wouldn't let a day go by without giving it a good polish.
Host: Well that settles it. Contestant three is withdrawn from eligibility. I'm sorry Harry. And Witch three, you can meet me later for some butter beer. So, it's either witch one or with two, Harry. Who's it going to be?
[Before Harry can answer there is a loud explosion and smoke fills the air. The man in the black cloak finally makes himself known. It is none other than Lord Voldemort himself!]
Host: Well! This *is* a surprise! We thought you were dead! Harry, didn't you say you vanquished him?
Harry: Uhhh, I thought I did.
Voldemort: You thought you could get rid of me did you? HA! Never! You'll never be rid of me. I'll always be behind you, waiting to pounce.
Host: Well Mr. Mort. Or should we call you Voldie?
Voldemort: It is Voldemort or the Dark Lord thank you very much!
Host: Whatever! If you want to do any 'pouncing' on Harry, I'm sorry you'll have to get in line. He's about to pick his dream Witch, if you don't mind.
Voldemort: YOU'LL NEVER BE RID OF ME!
Host: Harry, would you hurry up and vanquish him, we have another show to tape today.
[There is a large scuffle as Harry and Voldemort fight. Somehow in the process, Harry's shirt is ripped from his body. And like a moth to a flame, Draco finds himself back on stage]
Draco: What's going on? Oh my! Harry, you're practically naked!
Harry: Yes, thank you for pointing that out Malfoy, but I'm just a bit busy here, trying to vanquish the Dark Lord once again!
Draco: (Barley Audible) Would you look at those rippling muscles.
[The fight continues on, suddenly the room is filled with dozens of Aurors, Dumbledore is in the lead. They continue to fight, and with the addition of the extra Wizards, they are able to subdue and defeat Voldemort]
Voldemort: You'll never be rid of me, never!
[One of the Aurors floats Voldemort out of the studio, the audience bursts into applause]
Dumbledore: We apologize for this interruption, but we knew if Harry were to pose as a contestant on this show, it would draw out the Dark Lord from his hiding place...I'm just so sorry that...wait a tic...Professor McGonagall! What are you doing here? And in your underwear!
[McGonagall who had just finished changing into Lee Jordan's nightmare nighty, made her way over to Dumbledore]
Minerva: Well, Albus. I'm not getting any younger, and I thought I'd better try this since the personal ads rejected my letter once again.
Dumbledore: I've never seen you look so...so...so ravishing.
Minerva: Oh Albus do you think so?
Dumbledore: I don't think I can contain myself any longer, I must have you!
[Dumbledore and McGonagall are ushered out of the studio tangled in each other's limbs. Their loud kissing can be heard from backstage.]
Host: Well, we apologize for that scene. If anyone feels they need more then a memory charm to rid themselves of the Headmaster and the Professor groping...we will be passing out some fire whiskey after the show. Again, our sincerest apologies. Well, Harry it looks as though you get to choose between Witch number one, and uhh, Witch number one! Who shall it be?
Harry: I guess, Witch number one.
Host: Well, hold onto to your socks Harry, because you've just won yourself a tropical vacation for two with Miss Virginia Weasley! You'll be staying for three nights and four days at the fabulous Wizarding resort 'Merlin's Mirage' in Tahiti! There you'll find your days filled with adventure and your nights filled with...Oh, I'm sorry Harry, looking at my notes it seems that by order of ever male Weasley your nights will be filled with platonic hand shakes and two separate bedrooms. Tough luck mate!
[Audience bellows with laughter, Ginny is finally revived and immediately passes out again after being told she has won. Draco, unnoticed by all, sneaks back onto the stage.]
Harry: Mrhm...Flifh....Muad....Smersh.
Draco: Mhhhh
Harry: Malfoy! You just kissed me!
Draco: Yes I did, and you noticed!
Harry: Would you kindly take your hands off my bum!
Audience: Boooooooooooo!
Host: Well, it seems that our Mr. Malfoy can not contain himself when he's around you Harry. What do you say, mate? Want to take him with you?
Harry: Have you all gone mad? He's a man!
Host: Well, Draco it seems you're out of luck. But never fear! We've got three Wizards who are just dying to get themselves a little bit of that Malfoy Loving!
[Audience goes hysterical. Harry rushes off to hide behind Lee, protecting himself from Draco's wandering hands.]
Host: Well, we hope you all enjoyed today's show, and as soon as our winning Witch wakes up, we'll send these two on their way! Join us next time for 'The Dating Game!'
Announcer: All contestants receive a years supply of Chocolate Frogs and Bonko's Better Butter Beer! Better then before, more buttery then ever! All contestants must agree to the Official rules and be free of any curses at time of taping including Imperius and any other choice inhibiting potions or spells. Copyright 2002, Prey-Dupe Enterprises.
~~~~~ A/N:
Ok, that was totally dorky and I know it lol! But it was a lot of fun for me to do, because I normally don't write things like this. I have every intention of writing a second fic with Draco as our next Victim (let's be honest they are!)
If you would like to vote on who should be next in the victims chair...Feel free to just click review. It's that button right down there! HAHA!
Thank you to the dream God's or who ever put this idea in my head. I hope tonight I'll be able to sleep!
