Shattered

A/N- Well, I know many have already written what about happened after Mockingjay, but I want to add my own little contribution of how Katniss and Peeta grew back together. I became inspired by the song "Shattered" by Trading Yesterday. I think this is the ultimate Hunger Games song, and I highly recommend you guys listen to it if you haven't already. This song was never officially released, so I don't think the lyrics are copyrighted, but either way I own nothing! I'm just using this for inspiration. The lyrics will be quoted in italics. Enjoy!

Chapter 1- Proposal

"And I've lost, who I am,

and I can't understand,

why my heart is so broken,

rejecting your love without,

love gone wrong,

lifeless words, carry on,

but I know, all I know, is that the

end is beginning"

-Trading Yesterday "Shattered"

Katniss

I don't know if I will ever love Peeta the way he loves me. I do know, however, that I wasn't lying when I admitted that my love for him was real. I love him in my own broken way. Too little, too late; it will never be enough. The boy with the bread and the girl on fire lived happily ever after. Katniss and Peeta, the star-crossed lovers of District Twelve, together forever. But our life together isn't some sort of childish Capitol fairytale. No. It is the tragic struggle of two shattered souls condemned to death who survived against all odds. And now we must pay the consequences of outliving our family and friends. We survived, but now we must live, and that turned out to be more difficult. The nightmares haunt me; the memories overwhelm him. He tries to remember he loves me; I try to remember to love him. This is easier said than done.

"What are you thinking?" Peeta asked me as we lay in bed together one night. He was holding me in his strong arms, as if protecting me from someone, something, perhaps myself, perhaps my nightmares.

"I'm thinking that Haymitch was right when he said I could live a thousand lifetimes and never deserve you," I whispered softly. Peeta tensed. I looked up at his eyes to see that he had flinched; his crystal blue gaze expressing hurt.

"Don't say that," he reproached firmly. "I'm the one who was hijacked, I've hurt you more than I could ever forgive myself for," he added.

"That wasn't your fault," I pointed out.

"It doesn't matter. We've all made mistakes. I wish I had been able to protect you, but I wasn't; and you couldn't have forced yourself to love me sooner. None of those things matter anymore, the past is the past. We need to accept this and move on. All that matters is that we're finally together, and that we can rebuild our lives together. You're more than everything I need Katniss; you're all I've ever wanted," he insisted passionately.

Oh, Peeta. I thought. How could I possibly respond to that? He was right, of course, but so was Haymitch. But I knew there was no way to convince him of this. At least most of his memories had come back, and he was back to his old self. We had been living together for a few months now, since everyone assumed that we were married. That, and the fact that I needed him to keep the nightmares away; I needed him so that I could stay alive. I couldn't have gone on without him. It seemed selfish of me, really, and here he was declaring his undying love for me.

"I can't live without you, Peeta," I finally replied as I held the pearl he had given me during the Quarter Quell. I brushed it to my lips as I closed my eyes and rested my head on his warm chest, his heart pounding steadily beneath my ear.

He kissed the top of my head gently. "I love you so much, Katniss," he murmured in response.

I sighed. I suddenly remembered something somebody had said to me the day before, and I decided to ask Peeta about it. "Peeta, someone asked me yesterday how we were doing and I told them we had moved in together and that you were using your house as an art gallery, but they didn't seem to believe me. I was at the Seam and they started winking and hooting and laughing, so I left. Why were they acting that way?" I inquired as I looked up at him curiously.

Peeta blushed. "I'm actually keeping my artwork in your basement," he admitted bashfully. "And I'm planning on using my house as a bakery, but I wasn't going to tell you until it was ready; I wanted it to be a surprise," he finished.

"Oh, well, that's good, I'm glad you decided to do that," I said encouragingly. Peeta loved baking, but he had spent more time painting than baking in the last few months. I suppose it was understandable that he wanted to continue his family's business.

"I still don't understand why that was funny, though," I insisted. There was something he wasn't telling me, and I could tell by the way he was averting his gaze.

"Katniss, everyone thinks we're getting ready to have children," Peeta finally replied as he exhaled nervously. It seemed to have taken a lot of effort on his part to admit that. But it all made sense now. Everyone thought we were sleeping together, and that I would eventually become pregnant with Peeta's child. It wouldn't be the first time, as far as they were concerned. And Peeta was in the process of holding a steady business. This was the only thing they were right about, because I still had no intention of having children. It was too dangerous, and, no matter what Peeta said, I doubted he would ever be able to convince me otherwise.

"I'm sorry, Peeta," I said honestly. He already knew how I felt about that; I had no need to elaborate. He took my hand tenderly and then carefully removed the pearl I had been holding. I tried to protest, but he promised he would give it back to me later.

"Let's not talk about this now," he pleaded. "We'll worry about it when the time comes. I'm just happy that we're together." He held me closer, as if he saying that it was forgotten… for now, at least. But I knew better. We were too young to become parents anyway. We weren't even really married. And it's not like Peeta and I had been together that way, or at least not yet. I hadn't even considered it, and Peeta had never mentioned it until now.

"I want to wait until we're married." He explained gently. He seemed to have read my thoughts, and I knew he wasn't just talking about having children.

"Aren't we too young for that too?" I asked carefully.

He shrugged. "I don't think it really matters how old we are, at this point. We're both adults, and we're already living together. Not to mention the fact that we've been through a lot, and we can take care of ourselves. Plus, we love each other, and that's all that really matters. Everyone already thinks we're married anyway. It's not like we're not mature enough to handle it…unless you're not ready." He added as he tipped my chin up so that my gray eyes could meet his azure ones.

I swallowed. Was he officially proposing to me? I didn't know what to think, much less what to say. "Peeta, you know I love you," I began, "but I can't even assure you that we will ever have children or that I will ever heal and be truly happy, as you deserve to be," I explained.

"We'll make it through together," he insisted. "Being with you is what makes me happy. Nothing could make me happier than being your husband," he added, although he probably wanted to add that being a father would make him happy too.

"Oh, Peeta…" I began.

"Don't worry about it now. We'll figure it out tomorrow. Get some rest," he interrupted me as he pulled up the blankets on top of us and switched off the lamp on the bedside table.

"Stay with me," I whispered.

"Always," he promised as we drifted into sleep.

Peeta

"Yesterday I died,
tomorrow's bleeding,
fall into your sunlight"

The next day I took Katniss' pearl to the jewelry shop while she was out hunting. "I'd like to put this on an engagement ring," I requested the salesman.

The salesman took the pearl and inspected it approvingly. "I see you're finally planning to have an official wedding," he replied cheerfully.

I grinned. "That's right, I'm going to take her out to dinner and ask for her hand as soon as the ring is ready," I said proudly.

"Good for you; you two deserve all the happiness you can get," he added more seriously. "Tell you what, son; I can get this ready for you before dinner so that she doesn't notice her pearl is missing and so that you can ask her tonight. What do you say to that?" he suggested courteously.

My heart leaped with delight. "That's great; thank you sir!" I said graciously. Katniss would be very surprised. I couldn't wait until tonight. I had to make the dinner reservations soon and make sure that everything was flawless.

That same evening I picked up the ring and went home to get ready for our dinner date. I had already told Katniss we had dinner reservations, and she grumbled about having to wear a dress for no apparent reason. I told her it was a surprise, and she finally obliged. The ring was absolutely perfect, Katniss would love it.

"Peeta, have you seen my pearl?" Katniss asked as she stood in front of her dresser while putting her hair up into an elaborate hairdo. She was wearing a vivid red dress and matching heels that she had probably gotten from the Capitol. We took turns getting dressed in the bathroom and then finished up in the bedroom.

"What do you need it for?" I asked cautiously.

"I haven't seen it lately, where did you put it?" she insisted urgently, ignoring my question.

"Don't worry about it; we'll find it later, right now we need to finish getting ready so we don't lose our reservation," I said as I adjusted my matching red tie. I was wearing a black suit with a white dress shirt underneath it. We were in our finest attire.

"All right, I'm ready," she said as she turned to me. I took a good look at her and beamed in awe. She was absolutely stunning. I told her so.

She blushed, the blood rushing up to her cheeks so that they matched her dress. "You look great too," she complimented shyly.

I smiled graciously. "Shall we?" I said gallantly as I offered my arm so that she could hold on to the crook of my elbow. She nodded, and we descended down the stairs together as I held the front door for her so that we could step outside.

When we arrived at the restaurant (there was only one good restaurant in Twelve, and it was reserved for special events such as this,) the waiter led us to our table at the corner of the restaurant, where there was an enchanting view of the forest beneath the luminous night sky. Katniss gazed longingly out the window as I pulled out her chair so that she could sit down. I knew she would like it.

"Peeta, this is so beautiful, but why are we doing this?" she asked for the umpteenth time.

I reached across the table as I took my seat and held her hand gently. "Because I love you," I replied simply.

"Oh, Peeta…" she trailed off as the waiter came to give us our menus.

"Wine?" he asked, looking at us skeptically.

"Yes, bring me your finest red wine, please," I said politely.

Katniss turned to me questioningly as the waiter set down our silverware; each was wrapped elaborately in a white cotton napkin. I had requested earlier that they hide Katniss' ring inside hers. I turned to it anxiously as the waiter took our dinner orders of steak and mashed potatoes with vegetables. We figured we might as well keep that simple. They then brought us cheese buns (which I knew were Katniss' favorite) while we waited for our plates.

"How come we didn't get breadsticks like everyone else?" Katniss asked suspiciously.

"I guess it's because we're special, seeing as we're victors and all," I replied lightly as the waiter came back to serve us our wine.

"But how did they know these were my favorite?" she argued as she took a cheese bun from the basket.

"Who knows, I guess it's a coincidence," I lied.

She studied me carefully, then, finally, as the waiter left, she replied, "There's something you're not telling me, Peeta." She knew I was on to something, and I had to act fast so that I wouldn't lose the element of surprise.

"It's our anniversary," I said quickly.

"What anniversary? I didn't even know we had one," she said, confused.

"Of course we do. We have quite a few, actually, but I wouldn't expect you to keep track of them all. Last year we supposedly got married around this time, remember?" I asked.

Katniss frowned and considered that for a second. "Well, yes, but…" she immediately stopped talking after the waiter came back with our meals.

"Here you are; anything else?" he inquired after he set them down. We both shook our heads and thanked him, and off he went to tend to another table nearby.

"Anyways, where was I?" she asked as we began to unwrap our silverware. There…she had almost found it. Then, finally, she saw it- the golden ring with her favorite pearl on top, surrounded by smaller diamonds. She picked it up and gasped in astonishment, then slowly looked up at me.

I then slid off of my chair and went to kneel beside hers. It hurt to kneel on my prosthetic leg, but now wasn't the time to worry about that. Right now, all I could think about was the fact that I was going to ask the woman I loved to marry me. Ironically enough, I had never been more terrified in my life, for my biggest fear was losing her.

"Katniss," I began as I took her left hand and gingerly placed the ring on her finger, "I promise that I will stay with you, and cherish you, all of the days of my life, and that this ring is a symbol of the immeasurable love for you that I will always have in my heart. Will you give you me the honor of becoming my wife?" I proposed as my eyes looked lovingly up at hers, and I could see that she was beginning to tear up.

"Yes," she finally gasped as the tears escaped and began to run down her cheeks. And this time, she meant it. I heard everyone around us begin to applaud, but all I could see was her, and her only, as I stood up instantly and picked her up so that I could kiss her full on the mouth.

"I love you," I declared blissfully after I set her down gently and released her from our kiss.

"I love you, too," she said honestly as she looked up at me. And that was all I needed to know. Katniss Everdeen would soon be my wife. And I would become the happiest man alive.

"There's a light
there's the sun
taking all the shattered ones
to the place we belong
and his love will conquer all"

To be continued…

A/N- Okay, so that was the first chapter, what did you guys think? Too much fluff, perhaps? Please review and let me know, I'd love some feedback Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!