By The Creators Will
Welcome, Ladies and gentlemen to what I like to call the Creator!verse of the Borderlands universe. This concept was created by me and my fiancé in where we are creators of a universe and a bunch of unique vault hunters unlike the standard Axon, Roland, Lilith, Gage, or Krieg and etc. I am writing this for you today so I can share our unique creation in all there chaotic glory
Be forewarned. This will be treading into adult territory and is not to be read by younger individuals. If you are not of suitable age, please leave now and read something more for your age. Note, there will be fourth wall breaking.
I've kept you for long enough. I do hope you enjoy
Don't forget to leave a review and watch out for Mundy
Echo Recording Alpha
For all those listening or reading this, depending on what form this takes. I will introduce myself. I am Thaddeus Labab, Crusader of Justice and Vault Hunter. I also act as the Police, Ambulance, Judge, Chief Medical Officer and often a babysitter of the more unstable of my colleagues. The local opera house, art gallery and orphanage is run by me, my main job being repairing, maintaining and keeping Ug, Crasseus, Joker and Mundy away from the orphans.
From the moment I stepped off the bus, I knew I was in for years of hell. If it wasn't the bandits shooting at me that convinced me, then it must have been the hulking 6'8 tall Irishman that was my traveling companion who rushed into the fray of battle without fear or hesitation. I would have never guessed that Pandora would be my home for years to come.
It was sweltering hot day and I'd been stuck seated next to a very annoying siren by the name of Lucifer. Seated across from me was a disgruntled hunter by the name of Eris, who was trying to avoid being raped by a caveman looking fellow named Ug. Way down the back of the bus sat a soldier; I'd heard him tell his name to the bus driver earlier. He didn't seem like the most talkative person but he looked as his he couldn't get a word in as an annoying Englishman went on about his great hunts that he did in the African savannah. I'm not even going to talk about the woman that was using her tongue to paint another woman's tonsils.
It took me a second to process the information while the bus came to a screeching halt. That's when I heard their voices for the first time. The ones I would later, come to know as the creators. I can't remember what they were exactly talking about as it was roughly fifty or sixty years ago in my time.
I looked at the hulking fellow that had joined me in vacating the bus, He spoke with a thick Irish accent and smelt vaguely of whiskey
"You ready to fight?" he asked me
I nodded in reply and followed close behind him as he was already armed. He explained along the way that he'd done this before, not that I couldn't guess.
I instantly took cover behind the nearest barricade, watching the hulking berserker charge into the fray armed with only a revolver. He went against my years of training and my tactical mind, cutting down bandits with surprising results. I was shocked at the elemental weapon he was carrying as it melted through bandits like nothing. I didn't have the necessary skill to use my turret yet. I needed to level up
"C'mon, Ah haven't got all dey" The Irishman bellowed to me, Caving in a man's face with his bare hands. He's not somebody I'd want to brawl with.
After a few more waves of bandits and an hour of listening to the annoying robot named Claptrap, we reached Fyrestone. A sleepy little town in the middle of nowhere. That's where we met up with the others.
The others ranged from a myriad of backgrounds, job types and ethnicities. I was intrigued by the hunter named Kensington or Lord Kensington as he preferred to be called and his bird Sir Polly. He told many a tale of his youth and his hunts, almost an endless amount. He was mostly delightful. If you could put up with his arrogance
A Few I avoided where, Ug. He was, for lack of a better word. A caveman, with a liking of raping random things. Anything from Dead skag to bandits to claptraps, it was truly disgusting.
I also had a strong dislike for the mercenary Kayleth for her Greedy 'Fuck you' Attitude. She was against everything I believed in as crusader. She's delightful now that she's rediscovered her love of disco. No, I am not joking
Eris, I found interesting but never got to know him before he went crazy and got deleted by the all-powerful gods we call creators.
Rutilus was just as arrogant as Kensington but I accepted that as a by-product of being a solider
Lucifer… I don't know how to describe her. She's got the destructive force of a kiloton bomb but twice as dangerous. Like if, said bomb had ADHD. She was friendly though, kind of annoying
I know you're writing about me Thaddy fish.
…
Please ignore her, anyway back to the story
The sun was high over Fyrestone when we decided to split into teams. I got stuck with McCloud, The Irish brawler. Kensington was with Rutilus. Ug was with Lucifer, Who seemed to handle the big thug with relative ease and Kayleth was with the eerily quiet Eris.
McCloud and I had been sent out to kill the bandit Nine Toes, which wasn't an easy task for me. The drive there was slightly eventful when the creators decided to possess our bodies and make us try and run each other down. Neither of us where hurt much in the process.
Once reaching Skag Gully, we realised the name wasn't for show as the whole area was swarming with them. But the skags where not the most of our worries as hordes of bandits tried to take us down. McCloud dispatched them with ease using his trusty revolver. Say what you want about the man, He's a good shot. I covered him with my Scorpio turret, Resupplying his ammo every now and then as well as keep skag off his back. The man seemed to always keep himself in motion, not stopping when he gets a kill or has to reload. He just goes in with his fist or a pipe he'd somehow found. It's remarkable just how resourceful the drunken man truly is, even if he has no concept of tactics
The only thing that had me worried for a brief second was the swarm of badass skags that seemed to try and swarm my companion, McCloud simply shrugged off most of the punishment, pulling out a rocket launcher and aimed it directly at the ground beneath his feet. Was he insane? Probably but I have to admit that it worked. He cleared the badasses away in a few barrages, only going into what I've come to know as fight for your life. Most times the Irishman is able to get a second wind with his revolver or rocket launcher but sometimes the bandits run or McCloud is simply out of ammo so I have to get him back on his feet and drag him to the nearest medical vender
Once we got McCloud on his feet and endured the creator's berating of McCloud for his idiocy, we arrived at Nine Toe's lair. The smell of blood filled the air and the sound of skags stalking us could be heard, the foul creatures circling. That's when we saw Nine Toes in his full glory, the sign stuck to his crotch making McCloud burst into a fit of laughter. All I could do was face palm and thrown down my Scorpio Turret, it instantly taking action against the two massive skags circling us
The fight was messy to say the least, afterwards the ground and walls where stained a shade of red as McCloud sat atop the bandit, pummelling the bandit further into a bloody mess. We did what we came for, collecting some cool loot in the process. Mostly Blue items, the item system in this game sucks to say the least. Yes I am aware I'm in a video game as well as the mind of the two creators who so affectionately torture me. But that is what I have to deal with, I only wish for some rest. It was time for McCloud and I to tap out, Looked like it was somebody else's turn to endure this mass hellhole. Well, they're shit outta luck
This is Thaddeus Labab, Signing off for now
End Of Echo Recording Alpha
