A/N

I'm back =D

This is the first of hopefully many One-shots that will make up this prequel, but I must warn you that the updates will be sporadic at best. All I can promise is that they will be in chronological order.

This first one-shot takes place just after Merlin set Arthur's boat adrift at the end of Season one and then up till he leaves Camelot. Basically it's a more detailed version of that paragraph I wrote in the prologue.

I hope you enjoy.

Not beta:ed and written in one go so I haven't proof-read it.


Leaving Camelot

Merlin stood by the shore of the lake, staring at the spot where the boat had disappeared into the mist. He had no idea how long he had stood there, and at some point he had actually sat down, but none of it registered in his mind. He was empty except for the crippling weight of pain. A pain so heavy it was a wonder he hadn't succumbed to it more than he already had.

"Merlin?" A soft and gentle voice vaguely registered in the back of Merlin's mind, but not enough for him to react to it. "Merlin, where's Arthur?" At the mention of his name, Merlin drew in a sharp breath and for the first time in hours, he became aware of his surroundings.

"He's gone." He had to force the words out of his dry throat. "I was too late." He said in barely a whisper, but the quietness surrounding them that early morning; for it was just at the break of dawn Merlin realised as he watched the sun rise on the other side of the lake; was low enough to carry his words to the gentle giant standing behind him.

"It wasn't your fault." Percival's hand landed softly on Merlin's shoulder, squeezing reassuringly while he sat down beside him. "I saw her body," Percival continued when Merlin didn't say anything. "There's finally peace in Camelot."

"That's what h-he said," Merlin said, his voice surprisingly steady. "He thanked me."

"You where the one that killed her." It wasn't a question, more of a statement, but Merlin nodded nonetheless.

"I blame myself for what she became." Merlin clenched his jaws in anger, not at her, but at himself. "I could have prevented this."

"What are you talking about?" Merlin glanced sideways at Percival, noticing his questioning expression.

"It's nothing," Merlin shook his head. "It doesn't matter anymore." He grunted with pain as he stretched out his legs, having lost feeling in them a long time ago.

"Let me help you," Percival stood up and then grabbed Merlin's arm so he could pull him up into a standing position.

"Thank you," Merlin held on to his large arm as the feeling slowly trickled back into his legs. "We should head back, report to Gwen." He said and took a few hesitant steps up the small hill.

"I have a horse," Percival stated, walking beside him, ready to jump in if needed.

"I don't need a horse." Merlin grunted out, rubbing at his sore legs as he reached the top.

"I wasn't asking." Percival said and walked away to the horse that stood tethered a short few paces away. "Get up, or I will throw you up." He said as he came back with the horse in tow.

Merlin mumbled something incohearable before stepping up to the horse and lifting himself up on its back. "Don't think I will let you walk all the way back." Merlin said as they began their journey to Camelot.

"We'll see." Was all Percival said and Merlin rolled his eyes at his stubbornness.

It took them two days to reach the outskirts of the city; during which Percival told him about Gwaine and Merlin told him about Arthur; and after dropping the horse back at the stables the two men walked silently up to the throne room. There they were greeted by Gwen, Gaius, and Leon.

"I'm sorry," Merlin said silently, looking down at his feet since he didn't want to see Gwen's disappointed eyes.

"It wasn't your fault." Gwen voice was so close; it startled Merlin enough to make him look up. She was standing right in front of him, and with a sob she threw her arms around him and he hesitantly wrapped his own arms around her waist and back.

"I'm sorry," Merlin said again, his own tears breaking free as Gwen's sobs grew closer together. Burrowing his head in her hair, he let go of all the pent up frustration he had felt over the last days and the two of them stood together in each other's arms until neither could produce one more tear.

It wasn't until they broke apart that Merlin noticed the absence of the other three, only he and Gwen were left in the throne room.

"Will you stay until my coronation tonight?" Gwen asked, her eyes pleading and red from the tears. "I don't think I can be alone right now."

"Of course," Merlin gave her one more hug before stepping back, his hands on her shoulders. "I will stay right here beside you." He didn't mention that his promise only extended to the coronation and not afterwards.

The two of them left for Gwen's chambers so she could get ready, and Merlin sat silently and watched by the fireplace as her maid fixed her hair and dress.

By sunset, the two left hand in hand for the Great Hall were all the knights, nobles, and other important people were gathered. Giving her one last hug, Merlin stayed by the doors while she walked up alone to the waiting Geoffrey.

He cheered when the other cheered but not without releasing one last tear at Leon's proclamation of Arthur's death.

He left before anyone could start talking to him, heading directly for his small room in Gaius's chambers. Lying down on the hard bed, he let his mind go blank, not wanting to give in to his grief again.

The next day he started packing. Gaius just looked at him with sad eyes, knowing it would be futile to try and stop him.

He was in the middle of packing his clothes when the door opened and Gwen stepped in. Without a word she sat down on the bed and patted the seat beside her. Taking in her sad eyes, Merlin sat down without a small sigh.

"Look, Gwen..." He started.

"Gaius told me about the sorcerer." She interrupted him. Merlin looked at her with wide eyes, but she refused to meet them. Instead she seemed particularly interested in a thread on his mattress. "What I wanted to say is," She took in a deep breath and looked at him. "I'm not mad at you."

"You're not?" Merlin was surprised.

"I'm mad that you kept it a secret," She admitted with a small smile. "But not for whom you are."

"I'm sorry, Gwen." He looked at her with pleading eyes. "I wanted to tell you, tell all of you, but I couldn't." He swallowed hard. "I needed to protect Arthur and I didn't know who to trust, and... it all just went out of hand."

"I understand, Merlin." She stopped his rambling with a hand on his arm. "I don't need you to explain." She smiled. "Gaius has already told me enough and the rest I don't need to know about."

Merlin was speechless; all he could was nod and give her a small smile back, or more accurately, a slight twitch off his lips.

"How long will you be gone?" She said and averted her eyes again.

"I don't know," Merlin said honestly. "All I know is that I can't stay here any more, there are too many memories."

"Where will you go?" She sniffed and Merlin put an arm around her shoulders.

"I will go to my mother first, then... I don't know." He sighed. "Travel a bit, I guess."

"And if I need to contact you?" She looked up at him, her eyes brimming with unshed tears.

"Just send a bird with my name on the letter and it will know where to go." He said, glad he had taken the time to create a spell for just that purpose a few years back. "I should," He said, gesturing to his unfinished bag.

"Of course," Gwen sniffed, standing up but taking his hand in her own as she did. "Is it okay if I tell Percival and Leon?"

"After I've... you know." He waved a hand around. "I don't really feel up to talk to them about it right now."

"After then," She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. She sat down again as he continued to stuff down the last of his belongings in his satchel and then she took his arm as they made their way out of his room. She let go of it then so he could give Gaius one last hug.

"Read if after I'm gone." He mumbled into the old man's ear and gave him a sealed letter. "Goodbye, Gaius. You have always been like a father to me."

"And you my son." Gaius responded and Merlin gave him one more squeeze before stepping back and letting Gwen take his arm again.

They walked in silence to the city gates, the people watching them with a mix of interest and sadness. Merlin recognised the silhouette of Percival and Leon as soon as the gate came in view and he took in a deep breath to steady himself before they reached them.

"It's been an honour knowing you, Merlin." Leon said as he stood in front of them.

"Likewise," Merlin smiled at him and both of them reach out for a hug. "Percival," Merlin nodded at the gentle giant after letting go of Leon. "I'm glad to call you my friend."

"And I'm glad to call you mine." Percival stated and gave him a bone-crushing hug.

"Don't be a stranger, Merlin." Gwen said after Percival let him go. Merlin gave her a small nod and then took a few steps back towards the gate. He gave them one last wave before turning around and walking out, not once looking back at the looming castle behind him that he had once called home.


A/N

I hope you liked it and if you have any suggestions for historical events or places you want Merlin to visit, then let me know. I will try and bring up all the references I made in the story, but it is likely that I will forget one or two so don't me mad ;-)

I hope you have all had a great Christmas and New Years and that the rest of the week will be fantastic to quote Nine. I have fallen into quite the Doctor Who spell right now and I want so desperately to write a Rose/Eleven story but my muse stands still so you'll have to get by with this for now. I'm also trying to write a book which I have mentioned before, but It was slow for a while and I had to start over several times, but I think I'm on a good path now and after making a few edits I will soon have finished chapter 2.