DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SUPERNATURAL OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS! TITLE BASED ON A LINE FROM PANIC STATION BY MUSE. I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THEIR MUSIC OR LYRICS!
Unleash Your Heart and Soul
Dean had never felt as alone as he did now. Demoralized. Discouraged. Depressed. Every day was a struggle that he had to push through, like thick water that would smother the life out of him otherwise. Anguish. Affliction. Agony. He saw Sam every day, and for that he was grateful. Before, like so many other times, he tried to bring Sam back. Back from Hell, but all anyone would ever do was laugh. No matter how long he tortured them, they would laugh and laugh and laugh. Until Dean ganked them, that made them stop. But now he knew why, Sam was only in Hell for one day. Cass had dragged his ass out of the cage and pretended not to know anything, too ashamed that he brought Sam back without a soul. Dean sometimes wished he could forget everything. Wished he could become an amnesiac and start all over again, with Sam. He would have done things so differently. Dean would have told Sam he loved him more. He would have told him forever if that was what Sam wanted to hear. Perpetually. Permanently. Perennially. But he couldn't go back in time and fix all his mistakes, Dean knew that. No matter how bad he wanted to. All the longing in the world wouldn't send him back. And boy did he long, he yearned every single night. Dean even willed in the day too, whenever he looked at Sam and knew it wasn't quite him. Sam. Sometimes he would even pray. But all it did was have him meander through the good and bad memories he had with his baby brother. Both leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. So Dean planned and planned until he couldn't plan anymore. And when he found a way he almost cried. He would get Sam back. His Sammy.
