S c a r e d o f S i l e n c e

Introduction:

Axel Troublefield was a very normal man. He was an artist; he enjoyed many types of art as well. Paintings, sculptures, drawings, and literature. The list goes on, but the only one Axel can find his deepest talent at is… writing. If he drew a picture, it was uneven. If he painted on a canvas, it would look like blobs of clumped imperfection. And if he attempted to sculpt, not even he would know what it was supposed to be or look like. But when that man put an ink pen to paper, it was as if he had the artistic talent of the angels; to say the least.

And Axel was also blessed with looks and kind-nature. He was tall and awkward, but that's what made him charming. And how much of a gentleman he was made everyone swoon or gain a deep respect for him. He was a bit quiet, but he could talk for hours on end if you brought up anything related to the subject of writing.

But, as every human being is, Axel had a flaw underneath all of his perfect ways. He was horrified of silence. If he was alone too long in a silent place, he would go slightly mad. You wouldn't know who he was anymore. But he most certainly wasn't the Axel Troublefield everyone knew. And after these fits of madness he'd have, it's a bit hard for him to come down from it. And sometimes he still isn't all together when he has to attend some sort of party or event for art.

Axel also lives alone in his small, private, condominium. This is why he developed such a scared, hateful feeling toward the silence. He got so absorbed in it. And he would wonder if he would get stuck in it one day and never be able to get out.

But one day, he found the answer to this question, and that answer was; Roxas Scarret.

--

Axel was attending a dinner party at a friend's home. Riku Torry, the friend hosting this get-together, had just finished a painting that had sold for a pretty penny and he was happy. So he invited some close friends and a few others to dine with him that night.

The redhead was close to the door when he saw the window on the front of Riku's home and a busy brunette inside doing some last minute preparations. He knew this boy as Sora Scarret. Or better known as Riku's partner.

Axel smiled softly as he saw Riku walk into that room and wrap himself around Sora gently, kissing the back of his neck softly and in a warm, happy way. And then he made his way up to the door and knocked a little softly, hoping it was heard. And just as he was about to knock again, Riku answered the door warmly.

"Evening, Axel." Riku nodded with a sincere smile on his face.

"Evening, Riku." Axel tried smiling back, and it seemed to work.

As Axel walked into the home, he was greeted by an unbelievable warmth that over-whelmed him as he took the first step in. And how wonderful all of that food smelled. He smiled once more at the feeling this brought him. And he was glad he wasn't throwing another fit over silence at home. In fact, he almost had done the exact thing when Riku had called and invited him over.

But Riku called for that very reason. He was worried for Axel's mental health and just wanted to keep him as normal as possible. And getting him into public more often where silence is rare, made Riku feel Axel's sanity was safer. The rest of Axel's close friends know of this problem Axel has because all of them had seen him in one of his episodes before. They were all at his home, visiting, and he was in the middle of it when they came, and they were just in time. Axel was about to accidentally kill himself with a knife he was using to cut some tomatoes before the fit had started.

The very next day Sora had taken him to a therapist and then a doctor and they believed that he may have had Monophobia, the fear of being alone, or of oneself. But none of them thought that was accurate enough. So they took him to different therapists and different doctors until they finally got a close enough to good answer for Axel's problem; Sedateophobia the fear of silence, quiet. And they all were worried about Axel from then on.

And that's why all of their eyes were on Axel tonight. Because there were some people there that Axel didn't know, and if he went into a fit for some reason, they wanted them to be able to understand. So Riku was telling a few of the people there that he knew and Axel didn't know.

These few people included Sora's twin brother that Axel hadn't met yet; Roxas Scarret. And Demyx Riddell seemed to think that Axel would fall instantly for the petite blonde. While Zexion Fay seemed to think otherwise. These two were their own happy couple, but were very opposite. Sora likes to say that 'opposites attract', but Demyx and Zexion think a bit differently about it. They think that it's just the way the other makes themselves feel. Because Zexion used to think people like Demyx were annoying, and quite frankly, they all are not including the mullet haired man. And Demyx was quite afraid of people like Zexion, but only felt love toward Zexion, no other stern, serious people.

"Do you honestly think they will click, Demyx?" questioned the lilac haired man.

"Of course! Roxas will make Axel so happy, and if they are together we won't have to worry about Axel at home hurting himself because Roxas will be able to help him through it."

"If you say so..."

--

"Roxas, come over here please." Riku offered the blonde, who gracefully floated through the small crowd and over to the man.

"Yes, Riku? Sora?"

"Do you see the tall, skinny, redhead over there all by himself?" Sora began.

"He's hard to miss, of course I see him."

"Well, we want you to meet him. He's very kind, and he's one of our closest friends that you haven't been introduced to yet." Riku picked up where Sora paused.

"Alright, may I ask if Sora will accompany me?"

"Of course I will, Roxas." Sora smiled. And the older brunette twin linked arms with the younger blonde twin, and they began to walk Axel's way.

Axel himself noticed the twins' approach and looked sharp, but calm, as he always did. He caught sight of the blonde and knew that he was meeting a new person. And Axel hated that almost as much as the silence that seemed to torment him. But Axel just sucked it up for now and forced a smile at the two.

"Good evening, Sora. And I'm sure we haven't met, sir, so my name is Axel; Axel Troublefield." The grace on the redhead's tongue simply intimidating.

"It's very nice to meet you as well, Mr. Troublefield. I am Roxas Scarret, Sora's twin brother."

"I hope the both of you get to know each other very well in the future." Sora smiled to the two, hoping something would spark. But the look in both of their eyes just remained dark. Sora took a quick moment to look over at Riku with an exhausted look on his face. This was a sign to the silver haired man that nothing was really going to develop between the two men. At least not right now.

Sora then whispered to Roxas;

"I'm going to be with Riku, talk to me if you want help. Have fun."

And with that, the brunette was gone.

Roxas looked from Sora's disappearing figure to the lean, tall figure of the redhead before him. And to tell the truth, he was a bit speechless. So he tried to find something to talk about.

"So, you look like an author, what kind of genres do you like?"

"Well, I generally write a lot of poetry. Sad, angry, and love poems most of the time. But I really like to read comedy, horror, and more poetry. And I just can't seem to write happy endings, so I like to read them as much as I can." Axel smiled, getting into the mood of writing.

"Ah, that sounds nice. I like to read, though I'm not too good with a pen." The blonde giggled softly.

It remained silent for a moment besides the small conversations going on around the two, keeping Axel sane. And then, the blonde began walking away slowly.

"I suppose since you know my brother and other friends of mine I will be seeing you around, yes?" The blonde gently asked stepping back with each word.

"Of course."

"Then have a nice evening, Mr. Troublefield…"

And with that, the blonde disappeared into the crowd. And as Axel thought back to the conversation slowly, he realized that the blonde right away knew he was an author. Most people, when first meeting Axel, think he is a painter, or a sketch artist. But this boy was on the spot. Was that strange? Or was it really that obvious?

Maybe… it didn't matter. So that night, Axel went home, confused. But not really. In fact, he couldn't describe his feelings at the moment. His thoughts were rushing and he didn't know what he was doing really. Did he have too much champagne? No, he didn't really like how the bubbles scratched his throat. So he didn't drink that much. Did he eat too much? No, that doesn't mess with his head unless he's about to vomit.

But no matter the problem, Axel didn't feel like he knew the answer for it.

And that; was what he feared.

--

So, when Axel's car pulled up into his driveway, he immediately jumped out of it and ran inside his home. He then rushed to his desk and pulled out a paper and a pen. He absolutely didn't feel like writing, but he knew that for him that was the best time to write because it meant something was going to come out of it that he would be glad to have done later.

So upon his paper he wrote;

"So many faces come and go.

But none of them have emotions to show.

And I can't remember how long ago,

I saw a smile with such a glow.

Like yours

Behind the closed doors.

And all the painless sores,

Make life seem more

Like a chore."

And he was proud of the little pen that dumped out his words as they raced through his brain and he tried to catch them. And as the redhead read what he wrote over and over, he didn't know what to think. So he just shoved the paper away and went to get ready for bed.

Axel was in the middle of getting dressed when he heard it all around him. The image of nothing but white clouding his eyes. And then his muscles tensed. And he began shaking, and then the panic started. Oh, the panic. It made him so crazy.

And finally, the last bit of him that he had held onto so well finally disappeared. He was not Axel anymore; he was the crazy man that he became when he was having a fit. And he fell onto his bed, clutching onto himself as hard as he could. And, shaking as violently as one could, he got up slowly from his bed and wobbled over into the kitchen, where he started to thrash himself into everything and anything he could throw himself against. His subconscious mind saw the blood dripping but didn't care enough to snap him back and try to stop it. Finally, Axel lost all consciousness and was out cold.

And when he woke up the next morning, he was still a little shaky. But he still had the courage to pick up the phone and call Riku. The ringing drove him almost insane and he was about to hang up when Riku's voice came into his clouding mind, it broke the urge to go back into frenzy.

"Axel? Why so early? Are you alright?" The normal assault of questions.

"W-Well, I am alright now, but last night I had an episode and then just crashed. I woke up in my kitchen with blood on the floor. But yes, I'm fine; other than that."

"That isn't something to joke of, Axel. You could seriously hurt yourself one day!"

"I know, but it's alright. It'll be my fault and no one else's. So if I bring about my own death, you cannot stop me, Riku. And that's okay." Axel smiled a lonely smile as he hung up abruptly.

He had some writing to do.

He pulled out the paper he started form yesterday and read it over once more. He really liked it, and he thought he should add something to go with it. Like a collection. His next book could be a collection of poems.

Axel was very enthusiastic about this idea and set off to write more poems immediately. But he wanted other people to agree on this choice as well. So he set off to Sora's house. Knowing Riku wouldn't be too happy if the redhead came over right after hanging up on him.

Once he reached the brunette's home, he was excited to know what the boy would think about it. They had never really read Axel's poems before, so he knew that Sora would be a bit surprised by this leap in interest.

"Sora? I want you to come and listen to this idea I have for my next book!"

"Yes?"

Axel was so distracted by the new bolt of inspiration that he didn't even notice that the person listening was indeed not Sora, but a blonde. Who was smiling in content with the look of enchantment on the redhead's face. For Roxas was only happy if Axel was.

"I was thinking about publishing a bundle of poems so I could really start expressing the poet side of my-- Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Is your brother home?"

"Haha, no. I'm sorry he isn't. He just left for Mr. Torry's home. And I don't think he'll be back soon. Mr. Torry called with quite an urgency that I can only express as him having a bit of… worry? And I think it's something about you, Mr. Troublefield. He mentioned your name over the phone as my brother was speaking with him. Something about you having an episode of silence? Do you mind if I ask, Mr. Troublefield?"

Axel found the blonde's speech to be smooth. The smoothest voice he had ever heard. And the way he called everyone "Mr." so formally instead of just their names or nicknames… There was something special about him.

"Well, I suppose maybe I should just visit Riku's home so I can talk to the both of them and ask Riku exactly why he was mentioning my name…" He wanted to show that he was also smooth, but at the moment was failing.

"No, no. Please join me inside, Mr. Troublefield. I am quite lonely. Please join me for some tea?" And Axel just couldn't resist. He was lonely after all. And he really didn't feel like being alone and killing himself in the silence of his own home.

"Alright, I think I will. Tea sounds very nice at the moment." Axel ended.

"Wonderful! Please come in, Mr. Troublefield!" The blonde smiled widely.

Axel walked into the home he was already familiar with, but with a person he wasn't so used to yet. But he didn't mind. He would become familiar soon. Axel could feel it. And the blonde hurried off into the kitchen to prepare the tea for them. Axel just tapped on his knee while it bobbed. He was nervous for some reason. He couldn't express it. But the blonde always made him like that. And he'd only talked to the boy twice, including now.

When the boy was finally back with the tea, he had to excuse himself for a shower. He was preparing to paint for a wedding, and he and the couple had to meet and discuss what the painting would be of, how big it would have to be, and so forth.

And Axel stared as the boy glided gracefully up the stairs, wishing his smooth voice would come back. But Axel just sat there and sipped away at his all too entirely sweet tea. But after a few minutes he couldn't help himself and went upstairs to where the blonde was. Just to try and see if he was still showering. But just as he opened the restroom door, he felt himself lose it again. He crashed to floor, having it too silent for too long, and he didn't even notice.

Startled, the blonde jumped out of his shower with his towel wrapped securely on his hips. And when he saw Axel sprawled on the floor twitching and squirming, the boy screamed, but then realized that this might be what Sora and Riku were talking about on the phone. So the blonde kneeled next to the frenzying redhead, and grabbed him gently around the head. He pulled the rest of the struggling redhead close to his moist, wet, and warm body and cradled him. Whispered everything would be okay, he needed to calm down, and other little promises.

Axel finally snapped out of it after a while of hearing the blonde's voice. And he inhaled deeply at the scent of the boy's sweet smelling shampoo. When he noticed what he had done, he blushed a small bit, but regained his composure and wiggled calmly from Roxas' sweet grasp.

"W-What happened? Are you quite alright, Mr. Troublefield?" The petite boy asked, shaken up a bit.

"Oh, well, I have a little problem that makes me like that, but I promise you that I am truly fine." He smiled to the blonde, getting up and helping Roxas up as well.

"Please, don't mind me, get back in your shower and finish up."

"I'm finished already, you're lucky too. I would've had to leave you once more and that could have happened again. What if I had not been as quick as I was? Would you have died, Mr. Troublefield? I most certainly can't have that now can I?"

"I see. Well, Roxas, You must get dressed, am I right? I don't think your clients would want to see you in the nude. And, your guest doesn't really need that either." The redhead laughed at the last thing he said, maybe he really wouldn't mind seeing Roxas like that.

"I would fully appreciate it if you came into my bedroom with me to help decide what I should wear. If you don't mind. I mean, I am a man like you are, so it isn't like you haven't seen any of it before."

And Axel instantly became nervous. He couldn't turn down the offer, but would it be creepy to say yes?

So Axel opened his mouth up, ready to answer…

--

Wait for the next update!