AN: Just a quick one (since I know I'm supposed to be working on something else) but I was intrigued by Irene's textual appearance in The Lying Detective and Sherlock's admission that he does sometimes text her back, so here for you guys is my idea of those texts.
No copyright infringement intended, I own nothing.
0748 961 200
13/03/2012
Thanks for sending my old phone back to me, love, but as you see I have a new one. This one has better security, and a more obscure password, as per your suggestion. Even you couldn't crack it ;)
Received 10:21
Give me 10 minutes with it.
Sent 10:12
Add New Contact
- Name: The Woman
- Set Ringtone
The Woman
17/03/2012
Just read John's new blog post. You tried to drug him! What are friends for, eh? The things I used to use on Kate... Well, I could give you a demonstration, if you like ;)
Received 19:52
The Woman
26/7/2012
I spotted you in the market in Budapest today. Of course I suspected the rumours of your death were greatly exaggerated, but nice to have my suspicions confirmed. Not a very good disguise though, you're not worried someone else may recognise you?
Received 17:34
The art of disguise is knowing how to hide in plain sight. But you already knew that.
Sent 17:35
I managed to stay out of your sight.
Received 17:35
You were by the fish stall in a white blouse and red sun hat. You bought three pounds of oysters, clearly for dinner with a wealthy client.
Sent 17:36
There's some left over, if you're interested ;)
Received 22:20
The Woman
5/10/2012
Nice work in New Delhi.
Received 12:41
The Woman
25/12/2012
Merry Christmas. Sorry no present this year, though if you're in the area I wouldn't mind being unwrapped ;)
Received 21:20
The Woman
19/3/2013
In Hamburg, there's an investigation going on here you might enjoy. It's in the news, search for the Trepoff murder. Might be worth your time.
Received 13:04
The Woman
21/3/2013
Knew you couldn't resist! Dinner, while you're in the area?
Received 10:40
The Woman
2/6/2013
Today is my birthday, did you know? I'm 31.
Received 18:42
No 34.
Sent 18:43
Okay, you got me. How about dinner to celebrate?
Received 18:43
Not really practical since we're on different continents.
Sent 18:44
You lack imagination Mr Holmes. Haven't you ever heard of sexting?
Received 18:45
This conversation ends now.
Sent 18:45
Spoilsport. So when is your birthday? I'll have to make sure I'm in the area.
Received 18:46
I will find out you know ;)
Received 18:51
The Woman
5/8/2013
Just seen a man wearing a deerstalker, and here I thought you were the only one who wears them anymore.
Received 14:02
The Woman
30/11/2013
I need to call in a favour. How soon can you be in Kiev?
Sent 12:06
I thought you'd never ask ;) First thing tomorrow. What should I be wearing?
Received 12:10
Doesn't matter, just bring your gun.
Sent 12:11
Kinky ;)
Received 12:12
Behave.
Sent 12:12
The Woman
2/12/2013
Sorry I had to run, but you seemed to have it all under control. This was fun, we should do it again sometime.
Received 22:04
The Woman
6/1/2014
Happy Birthday! Told you I'd find out. Dinner?
Received 17:00
The Woman
10/5/2014
I think I need a new look, do you think short hair would suit me?
Received 11:07
[Picture Message Received]
13:52
What do you think?
Received 13:52
The Woman
12/8/2014
A friend just sent me a picture of you in Montenegro, looks like you've let yourself go a bit. Still would though ;)
Received 16:21
The Woman
5/10/2015
I heard you were captured by the Serbs, all part of the plan?
Received 9:47
The Woman
6/10/2014
Sherlock? Please tell me you're alright, I've had dealings with Antonije Borsko and know he is not a man you want to be on the wrong side of.
Received 19:24
Sherlock if I don't hear from you in 24 hours I'm coming to rescue you.
Received 20:21
The Woman
8/10/2014
I see I'm not the only one who decided to come after you. Good thing I do my homework before rushing in, wouldn't have wanted to run into the ice man.
Received 14:21
The Woman
4/11/2014
So, you're back in the world of the living. I'm pleased for you, really, not all of us have the opportunity to go back. I'm still here though, anytime you need me, for help or for dinner ;)
Received 8:38
The Woman
6/1/2015
Happy Birthday. Dinner? I'll keep asking until you say yes you know.
Received 18:05
The Woman
10/6/2015
Okay, seriously, an elephant in an apartment in Central London? Official secrets act be damned, you've got to tell me about it!
Received 17:42
The Woman
11/8/2015
So, John is married now? Found some pictures online, his new wife looks... nice. You looked dashing of course in your best man suit. Must feel like the end of an era for you two.
Received 18:02
Why do people keep saying that?
Sent 18:03
Oo, touchy subject?
Received 18:04
What makes you say that? I was merely pointing out the coincidence that you are not the first person to say such a thing to me. Doesn't mean it has to be a 'touchy subject'.
Sent 18:05
Because you replied. You know if you're feeling lonely we could always meet up for dinner?
Received 18:06
The Woman
2/11/2015
LOL! Excuse the term, but Miss Hawkin's stories about you are really rather laughable in both senses. What on earth did you do to the poor girl?
Received 13:59
The Woman
26/12/2015
Thank you. For Charles. I know you were probably doing it for someone else, but you have no idea how much I appreciate being out from under him.
Received 12:18
The Woman
6/1/2016
Happy Birthday. Just so you know, I've been in touch with my old contacts after hearing about the broadcast and no one has heard anything about Moriarty being back. But I'm sure you're on the case.
Received 16:41
The Woman
29/1/2016
And a baby now too, John has been busy hasn't he? Does that make you Uncle Sherlock? Please tell me you at least suggested Irene as a baby name ;)
Received 15:02
The Woman
8/5/2016
That's a perfectly good cover blown in Olso. Any suggestions for a new name? I quite like Yolanda. I definitely need to go someplace warmer next, I've had quite enough of snow.
Received 21:39
The Woman
27/9/2016
You were in Morocco and didn't think to text me? We could have had dinner.
Received 18:42
The Woman
6/1/2017
Happy Birthday. Dinner?
Received 17:41
AN: Phew, formatting took ages, still not quite what I had in mind, but it'll have to do. And I was guessing a bit at the timeline, hope it makes sense. Reviews appreciated :)
