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Loki now had the ability to access even the darkest realms in his mind without Gungnir. Though he would admit, it was severely draining on him. But the knowledge he had gained was too good to pass up. He needed more.
Sitting in his cell one night, he decided to indulge himself in a little dark magic and visit the void in which he'd been temporarily trapped. The journey was more draining than he'd expected.
Thor passed block after block of cells in the dungeon, seeking only one in particular. Loki's. Thor had taken it upon himself to visit his brother each week, regardless of whether or not Loki wished to see him.
Recently, Thor had become concerned with Loki's health. He was becoming increasingly sickly looking. His typically pale complexion becoming a ghostly pallor, his bright eyes sinking into the shadows that surrounded them.
Loki had not mentioned anything of the sort to Thor, but he always knew when his brother was not well. Whatever the cause.
Thor stopped in front of Loki's cell, meaning to announce himself when he saw Loki's eyes closed. But he was sitting up. Probably engaging in some kind of magical trance, Thor thought. But... He was sweating. And twitching. Something is definitely wrong.
"Loki." Thor said, hoping to get his attention.
Loki's mind wandered far into the depths of his memory he'd hoped not to venture into again.
"You think you know pain? You will long for something sweet as PAIN."
Loki's perception of the realm was collapsing on itself, but he was not released from the torturous string of memories that had enveloped him.
"I could've done it, father! For you! For all of us."
Silence. An anticipation that left Loki desperate for acceptance. Approval or death were his only options.
"No, Loki."
Death. So be it.
"Loki! Wake immediately!"
"I WILL NOT FIGHT YOU, BROTHER!" Thor had shouted.
It was sincere, and it was merciful, but Loki had been too far gone to accept it.
"I'm not your brother. I never was."
"Loki, this is madness!"
"Loki! Wake!"
"Is it madness? Is it?!" Loki was hysterical but he could hardly care, "Is it?!"
"LOKI."
Loki jerked violently back to reality. His eyes snapped open and he tried to regain control of his breathing unsuccessfully. He was hyperventilating a bit, but he'd be alright. So long as he wasn't in that dark, unknown void.
"Loki," Thor had entered the cell and had his arms out in case Loki needed to steady himself, "Are you alright?"
Loki swallowed, he couldn't speak at first attempt; his voice was weak and broken. He took a deep breath and responded,
"I-I'm fine."
Thor put a heavy hand on his shoulder and Loki sank involuntarily beneath the pressure. Thor grabbed onto Loki's shoulders and gently sat him down on the ground. Thor sat down beside him.
"Loki, I know you've been using magic. But I believe whatever you're doing may be affecting your health, you look awful."
Loki rubbed his aching head gingerly, trying to piece together a response.
"I-I've just been reliving some-" Loki stopped.
Why would I confess this to, Thor?!
"I'm fine."
