A/N: Here's another little one shot for you, since my musie has become fickle when it comes to completing 'Take me back to the start.' No worries, though. I gave you a promise that I would finish it before I would leave fanfiction. As long as musie is hiding, I'll give you one shots. Hahaha! I've used some lines and situations from TVD. Anyway, here's one from different times…

Secrets

Sometimes I wish that I was born in different times, where relations between two human beings didn't depend on status and money. When my father simply announced to me that Sir Matthew Donovan had asked him for my hand in marriage and that he had agreed, my fate was sealed. Yes, Matthew was sweet and kind and exactly the kind of man that any girl would be lucky to have and to hold. For a while I thought that if I just tried hard enough, he might be it for me. He wasn't. And yet, I was going to spend the rest of my life with him, because the man that I really wanted wasn't in my circles. He was… beneath me.

The man that I wanted and I practically grew up together in our Gilbert manor. His parents were the servants to my parents and they had taken up residence in the servants' chambers. Of course, from the moment Damon Salvatore was born, it was very clear that he was destined to follow in his parents' footsteps. They were there to serve and nothing else. Even though we lived in the same place, the unwritten rules were simple; servants were not allowed to engage with their superiors, unless asked to. Of course, as children, those rules still had to be learned, so Damon and I would sometimes sneak off to play together. We couldn't understand at that age how different he and I were in the eyes of the world. I simply enjoyed his company and vice versa. That all quickly ended when my dear mother caught us together and all hell broke loose. She had beat me within an inch of my life and lectured me about how boys like him would never live up to the expectations of women like us. We were not to engage with them, because they couldn't offer us anything. That was my first lesson in social differences. After that, we stayed away from each other. Damon had apparently received the same treatment from his parents, since he had never even looked at me after that incident again. And so, life went on.

I must admit that my attitude towards servants became a bit more demeaning after that. My behavior was exactly what you would expect from a socialite. However, when I did it to Damon, my heart always broke a bit. He would look down and simply nod at whatever silly request I asked of him. Why did I do it, you would ask? Because ever since I became old enough to know about lovemaking, he was always on my mind. I would dream about him doing things to me that were… taboo. That's why I was so harsh; I didn't know how to act any other way around him.

Right now, life was even more complicated. When Matthew and I married, he had already figured that I wasn't really in love with him. He didn't care, for he needed a wife and I needed a good husband. It was a silent agreement that we had. My mother had also felt the need to remind me that we were women and that we needed to make tough decisions in life. True love wasn't something that we necessarily needed to find in our circles; we only needed status and a good husband to provide us with just that. She had said that I was lucky to have found a man that was willing to treat me so well. I knew that she was right, but I still wished for things to be different.

Damon stayed on with my parents as a servant when I moved into Matthew's estate. Therefore, I didn't need to be around him so much anymore. However, my secrets began right after the first visit I had with my parents since the wedding. Matthew hadn't been able to come with me due to work obligations, but he said that I could go anyway. I met up with Damon for the first time in months, while glancing at some of the new paintings in our sitting room…

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ma'am. I didn't know anyone was in here," he apologized when his eyes landed on me. He immediately looked down and turned to head back out.

"Wait, get me a cup of tea while you're here anyway. All of this talking with my parents has left me thirsty."

"Yes, Ma'am."

For some reason, it irked me that he was so submissive. When I looked at his physique; his strong muscles, narrow hips and powerful thighs, he appeared like a man who would take control of every circumstance, even in the bedroom. I watched as he turned to get me my request and felt my heart drum loudly in my chest. He still had that effect on me: my throat would always go dry and my heartbeat would pick up at the sight of him. I shook my head, trying to focus on something else.

"Here you are, Ma'am. Can I get you anything else?" he asked upon his return.

"No. Leave me."

"Yes, Ma'am."

I groaned at my own behavior and wanted to cry at how unfair the world could be. "Please, come back. I've missed you so much," I softly whispered into the room, not realizing that I had said it out loud. He was only halfway out the room and picked up on my quiet whispers immediately.

"I'm sorry?"

I stared up into his face in horror. One look into those piercing blue eyes told me that he had heard every word. I licked my suddenly too dry lips and tried to control my breathing, but failed miserably. My chest was heaving and my cheeks were flushed. A look of surprise briefly crossed his features, before he slipped back into his submissive stance when my parents entered the room.

When dinnertime arrived later that evening, I was on edge. Every time he entered the dining room to serve us something, it was like he purposefully brushed his arm up against me. I couldn't be sure, though. He played his part so well.

"Elena? Did you hear me?"

Apparently, my father had asked me something, but I was too wrapped up in my own thoughts. I couldn't eat or focus on anything going on at this table. He was standing there, on the sidelines, looking down at the floor and waiting for us to finish. Nobody could suspect the torment he was inflicting on me.

"Elena, finish your dinner. Playing with your food is impolite and childish."

I was actually scolded by my own father… me; a grown and married woman. Could this day get any worse? And then it happened… Damon Salvatore slipped up when it came to his perfect stance; he looked. Every hair at the back of my neck stood up when he locked those crystal blue eyes onto mine with a look that screamed pure hunger. It was only a second, though. He immediately looked back down again, making me wonder if I had seen it at all. But deep down, I knew. He wanted me just as much as I wanted him.

Later that night, I was quietly walking the hallways of Gilbert manor when I reached the servants' chambers. Whether I wound up there on purpose or not, I wasn't really sure of. But just as I decided that I didn't belong there, Damon Salvatore walked out of his room in nothing but some low riding trousers and a shirt that was hanging open. He seemed just as taken back to see me as I was to see him standing there in nothing much.

"Elena?"

That was actually the first time since our childhood that he called me by my first name. It sounded like music to my ears compared to the 'ma'am' he always threw my way as we got older. It took a moment for me to find my voice and I smiled a bit sheepishly.

"I… I should go. I don't even know why I'm here."

I gave him a curtsied nod and went to turn around. Wow, he had looked like the epitome of what I had imagined a man should look like undressed. That chest was… I didn't even have words for it. The mere thought of it caused me to take a moment and lean against the far wall. I should not be having thoughts like that about a servant!

"Elena," he whispered behind me, obviously still standing in his doorway… watching.

I closed my eyes and buried my head in my hands, trying to control my breathing.

"Don't, okay?" I told him.

From the shuffling behind me, I could hear that he was taking a few hesitant steps towards me. "Why not?" he breathed. It was all said within those two words. Why indeed not? Because society told us not to… we were not allowed to feel what we felt. We couldn't be who we wanted to be.

"Elena," he pleaded again and this time, he got to me. I shook my head as if I was silently calling myself crazy for what I was about to do. Then, I turned around and closed the distance between us, crashing my lips into his. If someone caught us, we would both be condemned. He would lose his position and probably never work as a servant again and I… I would lose my marriage, my status and my place in society. We would be pariah's. But in that moment, I couldn't care less.

His lips felt silky soft as they glided over mine, weakening my knees. He pushed me into a dark nook in the hallway and my leg went up on its' own accord, hugging his hip. Our pelvic connection sent fire up my loins. I simply couldn't get him close enough. He put his hand on my buttocks as if reading my mind, pressing into me. I moaned into his mouth as I felt his hardness between us.

"Elena? Where are you?" the singsong voice of my mother could be heard in the distance.

Startled, I pushed Damon off of me. Then, I panicked and became the biting socialite again.

"Let's not talk of this again, shall we? I don't know what came over me."

The look on his face caused me to regret it, but the damage was already done. I nodded at him to bid goodbye, receiving a detached stare in return. "You should go and see to your mother, Ma'am,' he told me, emphasizing the word 'ma'am' in his speech.

I left Gilbert manor shortly after.

My fate had already been sealed with that one, simple kiss. I dreamt about him at night and couldn't stop thinking about him during the day. Months went by when I finally decided that I should just forget about Damon Salvatore. He had probably found himself a woman by now, suitable for his standards and they would marry. His wife would also serve my parents, or they would move out and find another master. Either way, this pining away for a man that was not for me was futile. Of course, it was during my second visit to my parents, that we made the biggest mistake that we could possibly make…

Matthew couldn't make it yet again, so I was left to face Damon all alone… again. We were back to being servant and socialite, only addressing each other when absolutely needed. Damon still hadn't found himself a woman, something that secretly pleased me. I learned to absolutely hate the word 'ma'am' during that visit, since he couldn't seem to get enough of it. It caused me to be even more of a twat than usual towards him.

'Damon, get me this! Damon, what do you think this is, proper serving? Get it right! Damon, the dinner table has not been set up right! Damon!'

I must have driven him nuts, but he never faltered. He remained polite and submissive, with his eyes cast downwards. That is, until I finally caved under all of the physical attraction between us and tried to get my parents to let him go. I just couldn't deal with him anymore.

"Damon is one of the best servants in our house, Elena. I'm not going to debate this with you. He is doing a splendid job. I'll talk to him and see what I can do about this irritation that you have with him. But letting him go is out of the question."

Scolded by my father, yet again, while Damon was standing a few feet away. His face revealed nothing. However, he revealed plenty sometime later. I was heading out towards the stables outside when he caught up with me.

"I had you pegged for a lot of things, Elena, but trying to get me fired is a lowball thing to do and you know it. I need to earn my living. Some of us were not born rich."

I stopped at the entrance of the stables and eyed him in shock. "How dare you address me like this! I'm your superior here and you need to respect me!"

"I've done nothing but respect you. Look, I'll leave you alone and do my job if you would just let me. I need this, okay? I need this position. If you want me to stay out of your way, I'll happily do it. I'll get someone else to serve you."

"That's not good enough. I want you off of this property after…"

"After what? After what happened last time you were here? If you want to talk about that then talk, but here's the thing, Elena. I don't know what to say… or do… All I know is that right now…"

He stopped for a second to quietly push me against the entrance door of the stables. I immediately backed up, looking around to see how I could escape him. "I want to rip your clothes off right here in the middle of this open field, throw you into those stables and kiss every square inch of your body while the horses and all of nature out there listens."

His words shocked the heck out of me, no man had ever talked to me like that. Not even my own husband.. and the reaction my body provided to those words was even more shocking. I was trembling, every bit of my skin covered in goose bumps and I was positively panting, as if I had ran for miles. My eyes couldn't seem to leave his lips as he silently bit them. It was intoxicating.

"That's probably a bad idea, right" he breathed close to my face, his breathing sounding not quite right as well.

My lips seemed parched as they opened and closed on their own accord. I should probably have told him that his behavior was appalling and that he needed to stop it instantly. I should have gone to my father with this, saying that this vile excuse for a man was making indecent proposals to a married woman. I did not do any of those things, however. Instead, I only breathed "Right" at his question, trying to hold myself together.

He raised his eyebrows at me, looking down at my lips one last time, before backing away.

I lay awake that night, a hunger I had never felt before threatening to devour me whole. A part of me was furious with him for addressing me like that, but I couldn't help the thoughts that had crept into my head with those few whispered words. My nipples were left aching and there was an incessant fire between my thighs. Finally, when the clock struck 3 a.m., I couldn't take it anymore. I got out of bed and began to walk towards the servants' chambers. There was no turning back after this, I knew that, but I couldn't be helped. This insane thirst needed to be quenched.

"Ma'am? Can I get you anything?" Damon frowned upon seeing my arrived at his bedroom door. I wanted to spank him for using the word ma'am again after all of those dirty little things he had whispered into my ear not too long ago. Instead, I pushed him back into his room and locked the door behind me.

"Elena?"

"Shut up!" I snapped.

After that, I almost charged. I pressed my lips firmly against his, while my hands began to work on the trousers he had obviously only thrown on because there had been a knocking at his door. I would just bet that a man like him slept naked as a jailbird.

"Elena, are you okay?" Damon tried again, obviously a bit taken back with my aggressive behavior.

I held my finger up against his lips, silencing him immediately. "Shh… I said no talking."

He certainly got my message after that, because he lifted me up against him and planted me firmly onto a small desk behind us. He started to kiss my neck, while riding his hands up my thighs and underneath my undergarments. I locked my legs behind his waist.

"You have no idea how long I've thought about doing just this. I think ever since adolescence, you were always on my mind," I moaned, as he softly pressed his hardness against my swollen folds.

"So have I," Damon confessed. "Even if you were a complete twat to me, I wanted to silence that biting tongue of yours by throwing you onto the floor and doing god knows what to you." I groaned as he bit my lip in punishment, only emphasizing his comment about me having been a twat.

When he released my breasts from their confinement, my nipples were already begging to be kissed. He complied immediately, taking one of them into his mouth. The sensation of him sucking on it almost proved to be too much, as I slid forward against his hard cock with a jerk. Wanting to feel him even closer, I pushed the offensive garment of his trousers down his buttocks and squeezed the twin globes firmly with my hands. When he snaked his hand down between us and pressed down on that little bud between my legs, I was done for.

"Damon, I don't think I can take it much longer. Take me, now!"

Damon chuckled against my lips with my comment. "Still ordering me around, huh?"

As he lifted me up from the desk and threw me onto his bed, I knew that ordering a man like Damon around in the bedroom would not work. He was master and commander when it came to lovemaking and he seemed dead set on proving that fact to me. As he drove his cock home, all hope was lost of ever getting this man out of my mind again. I was helpless in his arms.

The bed squeaked and my breasts jiggled to the rhythm of his thrusts and with each deep, long stroke of him inside of me I felt myself building up to a point of no return. Finally, something snapped at the core of my being and my silken walls clenched hard around him. He was not far behind me, coming inside of me with a growl of satisfaction. He did not stop pounding into me, however, until the last tremors of my quivering walls subsided. Afterwards, I was so weakened that I feared that I could no longer stand, let alone get back up to my bedroom just in time for daylight. Just before my eyes fell shut with fatigue, I smiled up at him. This man didn't deserve to be a servant, he deserved to be waited on hand and foot. Sometimes, the unfairness of this world felt overwhelming to me.

The next day, nobody suspected a thing and Damon and I slipped back into our routine with careful purpose. Nobody could ever know about us. And so, our secrets began.

We carried on our love affair for years, with all of the pain and frustration that came with it. We were driven nuts when we were around each other, but we were even more miserable without each other. Damon tried to end things at one point, not being able to take only seeing me a few times a year, hiding behind everyone's back. He told me flat out that he couldn't stand being around me and not being able to touch me. He also told me that he had a hard time being in my life, pretending to be my servant. So he gave me the promise to stay away from me. That didn't last very long.

"I'm supposed to be avoiding you," he mumbled as he ran into me at the stables. I sighed and looked at him expectantly.

"Is that what you still want?"

"Yes… No… I don't know…"

I watched as he looked down at the floor, trying his best to keep his cool.

"Look, if it's too hard for you to be here, then maybe…."

I let the end of that sentence hang in the air, gauging his reaction. He raised his gaze to mine in surprise.

"Are you going to try and get me fired again?"

I smiled a bit. "Yes.. No… I don't know."

We both chuckled at that a bit.

"Look at us; we seem like a bunch of sad, lovesick teenagers."

"So what are we going to do about that?" I retorted at his joke.

We flew into each other's arms at that, with him taking me right there at those stables.

Things became worse after I got pregnant. Damon was hurt and angry at the whole situation and eventually left Gilbert manor to work for the Forbes'. Both my and Matthew's family were pleased to have an heir to carry on their beloved companies and social statuses. It was a boy and we named him Daniel, Danny for short. I doted on him, since he was all I had left. He was also my very last secret. From the moment he was born, I had known.. His eyes were so incredibly blue, it was impossible to get around it. I knew, but I never told anyone. Because if people were to find out, we were all in jeopardy. I let everyone think that he was Matthew's son. He would grow up safely and never want for anything. Oh, how I'd wish that he could carry his father's name and that we could be a family. But some things were not meant to be. So yeah, I wish that I had been born in different times, where we could all be ourselves and be with whoever we wanted to be with. But then again, if I had been born later, I wouldn't have met Damon and I wouldn't have my Daniel. Most importantly, I wouldn't have known my one true love…