A/N: I wrote this for "International Story-telling Day" (20 March) which I had no bloody idea even existed. Bad language aside, enjoy the story and please R&R.
Bedtime Story
"Tell us a story, Hilda Obaa-san." Laki whined.
"Story, story, story!" Levy squealed.
Hilda looked at them. The little daisies of Fairy Hills were gathered at the foot of Erza's bed. The day was a busy one and the active dorm-mother was very tired. Nevertheless, she loved the way the girls' eyes sparkled, even the ones with the hardest pasts, when they heard her bedtime stories. So, no matter how tired she was, she always obliged their demands. Not that it was an easy task.
"If you don't have any patience, quit being a mage!"
"There she goes again..." Erza sighed.
Hilda was perched on the bed. "I'm starting. Sit quietly if you want to listen.
"Deep inside the forests, far out the borders of Magnolia, lived an old man. He-"
"I thought stories started with a young, handsome prince." Laki said, "Then at the end, he and his beautiful princess rides on his beautiful white horse, off to the horizon of of their endless, coral love."
"Can't you talk normal? Levy asked.
"I talk just fine!"
"You seem a bit off to me too." Erza said.
"Don't interrupt if you want to listen. If you can't keep quiet, quit being a mage!
"What does that have to do with anything..." Erza sighed, then commanded, "Listen to her, girls."
As the girls settled down, Hilda resumed her story.
"The old man lived alone in the woods. He had no friends or family left."
"Wasn't he lonely?" Levy asked in a sad voice.
"Yes, he was very lonely. Now listen; all of his friends and family had died. He didn't want to disturb other people either. So, he left the town for a cottage in the woods."
"He seems like an old grump." Laki commented.
"Listen to the story, if you would. The old man struck rather odd to others as he looked like a vegetable."
"That is just absurd." Erza said.
Hilda started to resume her story as she was interrupted again by Levy, "What vegetable was he?"
"Maybe a broccoli." Erza shrugged, "Even I don't like those.
The dorm-mother watched as the girls tried to figure what the vegetable-man looked like, what type of person he was, what he ate, what he wore, why didn't he have a wife or children et cetera, et cetera. Then, Laki proposed, "He had no wife because he was failure at romance and no children because- " This had to have a limit!
"If you're going to just talk amongst yourselves, don't ask for a story!" she said as she stomped out of Erza's room, slamming the door.
"What's up with her?" Erza asked.
The girls just shrugged at each other.
"And you guys say, I'm weird." Laki hmphed.
"I honestly thought she was going to tell us to quit being mages again."
Somewhere far, far away, a broccoli-man sneezed.
"Someone must be cursing the day I created the damn guild." he said as he went back to watering his plants.
The End
