Alexis Macrae

"But it's New York. There is gonna be an ocean between us. What if you ever need my help" Declan had tried to talk her out of going to New York college for about 3 months now. 'I know but I'm growing up. Gonna be on my own now. Spreading my wings, learning to fly. All that crap. I'm gonna be fine Declan. Stop worrying.' she said and smiled at him.

'Lexy are you coming?' Bree was standing in the doorway of their bedroom. 'Yes, one minute' she answered. 'Don't let the Girls wait, it's pizza night.' With that she left. Alexis let her head fall back against the wall. When she signed up for the writing class she had been really excited about it. But now she felt like she wasn't gonna be good enough. All the people in the class where so talented. "Lexy" Bree yelled. "Coming" she yelled back, closing the laptop and putting on her boots. Her leather jacket and scarf were downstairs. When she came down the entire group was waiting for her. 'Sorry' she muttered while grapping her stuff. 'Let's go, last night together before winter break' Nora said. 'Let's live for tonight' Riley yelled, and the entire group agreed.

'Miss' the taxi driver turned around to face Lexy. 'Sorry' she said when she realized they were standing still, and she was supposed to get out. 'Do you need help with your suitcase' he asked polite. 'No thanks, I think I'll manage' she handed the guy the money and got out.

She was standing for the sanctuary. She hadn't been her in two years. The first year of college she had come home for the holidays. The last two years she had been too busy with work, school and traveling. She wanted to see the world. Go to places and find inspiration to write.

She took a deep breath before ringing the doorbell. 'Alexis' Todd said surprised. Todd was a London sanctuary team members for 5 years now. There age difference wasn't that big. She had just turned 21 and he was 26. Sometimes she felt like he was one of the only people that understood her. She and Declan didn't always see eye to eye and he had always been there to listen to her. 'Todd, how are you' she said as she gave him a hug. He helped her to get her suitcase inside. 'what have you got in here, stones?' he asked, 'No, shoes' she smiled at him and he grimaced back. 'Declan will be happy to see you. He missed you' he said while carrying her suitcase upstairs. 'yeh, I missed him too' she said. 'Liar' he said, 'what' she turned around. 'You love New York. I bet you haven't given us a single thought.'

After she changed in more comfortable clothes, she walked towards Declan's office. 'Declan' she said as she knocked on the door. 'Come in' he said, she opened the door. He was sitting behind his desk, across from him sat a women with brown hair. Her back towards the door. He blinked twice before realizing it was really her. 'Lexy' he said and stood up. 'Declan, it's good to see you again' she smiled at him as he hugged her. Until now she had forgotten how much she missed his hugs. They made her feel small but safe.

'I didn't know you were coming home' he said as he let go of her. 'I sent an email' she said, 'but my account is being weird. Not sending email, not getting email. Sending empty emails. It's living it's on life'. 'I hope it's not a problem, I mean I could catch a plane back if it inconvenient I'm here.' Her eyes went to the women. She had turned around. Her face was familiar. 'No' Declan said almost immediately, 'I haven't seen you in two years. What on earths name have you done with your hair' he said. She laughed as he examined the strain of hair he had picked up. 'I dyed it, it's called dip dye' she said, 'Blue?'. Declan obviously didn't like it. 'Blonde and blue. It's nice and I like it'. 'I liked it better when you were just blonde'. she stuck her tongue out at him and then smiled. 'Don't get cheeky with me young lady' he laughed. 'Never' she said as left the room.

She skipped dinner so she could unpack, she had missed her old room. The Clash poster hanging on the wall, the stack of books on her desk her coffee mug on top of them, the cardigan that was still hanging on the back of her desk chair. She let out a sight, she was home.

Around 9 she was starting to get hungry so she decided to go to the kitchen for a late night snack. Pizza or ice maybe. In the kitchen she found the women standing against the counter. 'Hello again' she said with a smile. Lexy smiled back, 'hello'. 'So your Alexis, Declan's sister' she asked. 'Yes and you can say Lexy. And you are?' she asked while opening the fridge. 'Helen Magnus' she said and Lexy turned around. 'The women from James story, and the boss of all this' she asked. Helen smiled, 'what did James tell you about me'. 'It's kind of embarrassing, not for you, for me and the story. It's a ehm.. a funny story' she was starting to babble. 'What did he tell you' she asked again. She took a deep breath before speaking, turning her back on doctor Magnus to put the Pizza in the oven. 'After the death of my parents I had a lot of nightmares, James always told me stories after I woke up about you and him and London. They kind of helped me through it.' She turned to face Magnus. She was still smiling, but it was a different kind of smile. The kind that said "It's okay, don't worry".

'Hey, I already miss you' Bree said through the phone. 'I miss you too, it's kind of weird knowing you're not sleeping in the same room, but god know how many miles away'. 'Same here, I'm sharing a room with my sister. She wasn't so happy to see me. Knowing she had to share the room again' Bree laughed, 'you should've seen her face when I said I was home for the holidays'. 'Declan was surprised to see me to, apparently my email got lost again' Lexy was putting on her pajama. 'join the club' Bree said, 'Oh gotta go, my sister is looking very angry at me because I'm using the landline. Speak to you soon' and with that she hung up. 'Speak to you soon' Lexy muttered.

The next morning she got the chance to meet the rest of Doctor Magnus team. They were all every nice to her, but she couldn't shake off the feeling that doctor Magnus was looking at her. 'So what are you gonna do while you're here' Declan asked. 'I have a writing assignment, so I'll probably be busy with that'. 'The entire two weeks' Declan had stopped eating and everybody was looking at her now. 'It's a big assignment' she said softly. 'It never took you two weeks to write a story'. 'Well, now it matters and I'm blank. Got no ideas, no inspiration. Nothing' she took a big sip of coffee and avoided looking at Declan. 'It's not that abnormal, lots of students get black out when they feel pressure' Will said. 'Yeah, good to know but that doesn't really help me right now' she smiled sadly. 'So I'll be in my room for the next two weeks, hoping I'm not a complete failure' she said and picked up her plate and placed it in the dishwasher.

She had managed to write two pages, when someone knocked on her bedroom door. 'How are you' Magnus said as she entered the room. 'fine' Lexy closed her laptop and sat up. Magnus came to sit on the edge of her bed next to her. 'How is the writing coming'. 'Not' Lexy let her head drop in her hands. 'When I got accepted for the writing class, I was so excited. I annoyed all the other girls with my happy behavior. And now, when it matters, I got nothing. The best story gets published in a magazine. This is my chance, and I'm screwing it up'. She looked up at Magnus who had placed her hand on Lexy's shoulder. 'Stop putting that much pressure on yourself. It's not good for you. How about, you take tomorrow off, go shopping with a friend, don't think about writing for a moment' with that she stood up and left the room. She never really had any friend here in London. So shopping with a friend was going to be hard, but shopping alone sounded just as good. Maybe get some new shoes, some nice dresses and skirts.
She had the winter ball coming up and she still needed a dress.

She turned off the light and curled up under her blanked. Right before she fell asleep a question crept in her mind, why was Magnus being so nice to her?