Simpsons Meet Brandy and Mr. Whiskers
Chapter 1: Amazon
Beginning AN:
Background since this story doesn't start out with one: This is kind of from the ending of Blame it on Lisa, when I saw this when I was really young I was an idiot and thought the Simpsons ended up crashing into the Amazon Rainforest, and that's where the story came from. Also, I'm sorry, but I haven't seen B&MW in ages (I haven't seen Simpsons in years either, but that's not as big of an issue and I just stopped watching that one), and I only saw the first season at that, so there's probably going to be something that directly contradicts with the second season here. That's not even getting into the geographical stuff. To elaborate on the story itself a little:
Well, this is an idea I got when I was... around seven or eight. I wrote this over a series of papers, but only got up to the equivillent of the beginning of chapter two. I can't quite find the original papers, but they may be somewhere around my house. Anyway, I just want to say to forgive the absurdity of this.
Either way, I decided to redo this into a full story (the original paper was written in script format, for Christ's sake) as well as touch up a few other elements. Said elements will be explained in the closing notes at the end of the final chapter.
The challenge for this was to write it in only two weeks: From the beginning of February to Valentine's Day, try to get all four chapters out, and on said last day post them all at once. This failed horribly, and now I'm just getting a sort of challenge to try to write a "mini-series:" These chapters are, by intention, a lot shorter than what I usually write for a fanwork. Especially this one, since it's the introduction and not much happens in this chapter itself. Since the original plan when I was really young was for each chapter to be on a different "checkpoint location," as you can tell from the chapter titles, they'll also be short. This might mean that some plot points won't be explored as much as some of my other stories explore their plot points, but that's kind of the risk I'm taking. If you really like the plot for some reason and want something to blame, I guess you can direct that towards Over the Garden Wall. (But please don't I really like that series.) It kind of pushed me to keep up with this "keep it short and wrapped up" challenge I'm doing with this.
I know I retired Simpsons from SBIG, and even though this isn't SBIG, having "main" story appearances from them is kind of over/never really going to happen, but thanks to Grandfather Clause this is one special little exception. Well, in addition to the Grandfather Clause, there's something else, but I'm sure you'll see that soon enough in the story...
This fateful morning began with the air above the Amazon Rainforest cloaked with fog, that shaded a rather curious set of cable cars hanging high above the jungle. Two cars in particular were traveling on opposing sides, taking a slow trip to eachother.
"I don't like this ride at all." Marge said with a head shake. "Why is this going over an entire rainforest? Couldn't they pick something around, I don't know, a mountain? And why do we have to go so far from Rio, too?"
"This was a new attraction." Lisa explained calmly, "They say it's built to give a long, slow peek at the wilderness below. That's why it's unpopular. And that's why we have to come here at dawn. It's all in a big plan to get even less people here that might witness... well, the fact that Dad's kidnapped."
Their car finally stopped when it was shortly away from that of the kidnapper's, two doors-length away from eachother. This length was shown by, after each of the groups opened their car's doors, they nearly touched eachother.
"Okay, we payed you already, give us our Homer back!" Marge yelled to them.
"Easy now," One of them said with an appropriate hand-lowering, "We don't want this to be a waste. 'Your' Homer can make the jump himself. That way, if he falls, we don't take the blame for not throwing him hard enough."
"That's... oddly generous for kidnappers."
"Nah, we just don't wanna have to throw a guy like that. Well, Homer?"
He took an arm out and on the outside of his car, peering down nervously.
"I don't know... I don't think I can make a normal jump." His expression lightened as he snapped his fingers, "But a wall jump!"
"A what?" Lisa yelled from the opposing ride.
"I don't know what that is, but come on man!" Was Bart's own cry, "Do it! Try it!"
He took a leap, and time slowed down - for everyone that wasn't a kidnapper. As Homer predicted, he started falling just before making it to the end of the length of his car, legs kicking fast as the adrenaline began picking up, before he stuck the right one out to the door and gave a mighty push.
This worked.
Homer flipped through the air with confidence, gaining enough height to briefly go over both cars and putting a left leg to the door that the rest of his family opened. He gave a push on this, now straightening out and facing them diagonally. He happily cried, "CANNONBALL!"
He pushed again, hitting the floor face-first and causing the car to violently shake from all of the force. During the shake, Marge made a grab for Lisa and Bart, and was about to embrace Homer as well before it stopped.
"Don't ever do that again." Lisa said among Marge's heavy breathing, deadpan.
Bart moved away from Marge to face down his sister. "What? Really? That was the coolest thing he had ever-"
The now-weakened cable holding them up snapped, sending them plummeting to the blanket of leaves below. The pair of crooks looked out of their own car and shrugged.
"Hey," one of them said, "If we threw him and he didn't even make it outside our own, would that happen to us?"
Whiskers was only just keeping his head visible from an outside window. "I'm almost afraid, but Brandy, what is that sharp-looking, very sharp thing that looks real sharp?"
After brushing the wood against a rock again, she swung the object around with a rather bruised arm. "It's a sword."
"Wh-wh-why a sword?" His head got even lower and more out of sight.
"Because I was almost trampled by an elephant yesterday, and I realized that I need to show a little more power if I want to avoid getting hurt. I mean, an elephant of all things! Those don't even normally live here!"
Now he was letting his full head through. "Really? You didn't go crazy and-"
"No. Look, we made the jungle a little more like home, but it's still a crazy place! Anything can happen, anyone can-"
As if on cue, a loud crash sounded with a violent shake that tossed the dog back and the bunny off of the treehouse's tree. The former ran to the door and stuck her head out, not really paying attention to Whiskers weakly climbing the house's steps.
"What was that?" Brandy asked. All she got in response was a shrug from Whiskers and a faint voice:
"Ow! My head..."
Brandy laughed. "New people!" Sword still in hand, she climbed down until she reached the point just above Whisker's location. She jumped the rest of the way and ran towards the voice. "Come on, I'm going to check them out."
Whiskers pressed a hand to his mouth: "If they turn out to be baddies, then you have something to test that sword on!"
He turned away from her and shuddered. "That sharp, sharrrp sword..."
Which she used to cut through any shrubs and vines that would, at worst, slow her down. Now that she could try out her 'completed' (eh... close enough) weapon, she started laughing along with her run.
That is, until she came across the wrecked red car. Smoke was leaking from it, as well as some weird golden blobs-
No, wait, those were people. Brandy quickly stuck part of her sword in a sheath, before thinking about what Whiskers said earlier and taking it back out.
"Oh. The yellow guys. You must be aliens-"
"Hey," the largest one said as he aligned himself, "Just because we're part of that race long ago doesn't mean were from their planet. I mean, you're a talking dog, does that make you... oh I don't know, you look like a Floridan but you're right here! Does that make you a-"
"Yes." Brandy sighed. "Yes it does. I am Brandy Harrington, of the Florida Harringtons, and I was left here stranded for almost a year before... well, I sorta grew attatched to this place."
"I am Homer Simpson. Of the, uh... Ohio Simpsons."
"Bart."
"Lisa. And that distracted-looking one over there is our mom, Marge."
She then noticed the one with tall, blue hair whipping out a smart phone.
"Hey, are you-"
"Calling for help, yes. And you might need the help too. I mean, what about your family?"
Brandy shrugged, giving the sword a one-handed flip. "To be honest, after finding a huge mall here, I didn't care about rescue so much anymore. But if I have a chance..."
"Okay, but I get the first dibs. I feel uncomfterable letting other people touch my phone. In fact, I'll dial yours and talk to them. Who did you say they were, exactly? The Florida Harringtons?"
"But!" Bart interrupted, "It's those guys! The Florida Harringtons! Come on Mom, you have to let her talk to them! They can come up with anything better than anyone else can!"
"But..." She leaned in to whisper, "Other people touching my new phone..."
"Mom, please. Just this once. Be cool. Those Harringtons can be pretty stuck up, even I wouldn't know how to talk to them and neither would you."
"Hrrrmmmmm... okay, fine."
Tossing the phone to a slightly eager Brandy, she began to dial and engage in a casual chat.
"Hello? Yes? It's me. Yes, I'm still alive. I was stuck in the Amazon Rainforest the entire time. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. It was all because of a stupid rabit. And- oh! Really? That's good, but is there anyway I can go back... if I want to! I don't want to be stranded, it's just that- great!"
She moved it away and continued talking to the Simpson family. "That was one of my relatives. He says he can use your phone to track my location, and he'll set up a search party for all of us!"
It was then that Whiskers finally entered the scene, running towards them all while happily waving a small, splintering knife in his hands. "Look Brandy, look! I made a sword too! I have my own-"
He tripped over a root, causing his freshly made weapon to flip through the air and stab right through Marge's smartphone. The Simpson gasped.
"You're gonna have to pay for that." Bart chimed in.
"Not only THAT," Once Whiskers took his head off of the ground, he saw Marge looming over him, telling him this. "But now we're stuck here until- well, who knows when!"
"Actually, we're not." Brandy said, opening the device and picking out a chip. "The tracking device should still work, right?"
"...I guess?" Marge shrugged. "I don't really know how these new gears and chips work! Just yesterday I think I bought four apps by accident."
Bart laughed. "Oh man, I tried something like that before! Trust me, this will work!"
"Okay, maybe it does, maybe this is a different model?" Lisa cut in, "Either way, I don't like this place. Did your family say where they were going to start their search, by any chance? Any landmarks we can get to? So we can leave as soon as possible?"
"Yes, actually!" Brandy cried. "They said they were gonna take a ship, and land on the beach at the far... east in of the Amazon. I don't know. My owner had to talk to one of his friends about it. As to... whether there was such a thing, or if the rainforest was all land."
"That's a start..." Lisa muttered, backing her feet away from a suspicious looking dark ant. Finding no neighbors to that purple-ish insect nearby, she gave a mild sigh in relief. "We should make it there."
"Heh." Homer said. "Good luck making it out of here. Don't you know? If you're lost, you start going in circles! I'm not even sure Brandy knows the way to the beach!"
"I... don't-"
"Well I think I do." Lisa cut back in. "Moss. It always grows north. We can use that as a guide. And with a way to tell that we are always going in one carnal direction, we won't be going in circles."
"Really?" Brandy got closer in interest. "It was that simple?"
"Sort of. We could just go right when we spot moss. Or just walk towards the sun while it's rising, or away while it's setting."
"B-b-b-but Brandy!" The rabbit finally interjected, "Don't you want to say any last words to... anybody?"
"Hmm..."
"Well?"
"Nope. Let's go."
"...And the sheath is just as neat. I carved that too, mostly out of the harder wood. But I tried not to carve too much. Not because I didn't really care, but because I don't want to put my sword inside what's just... another sword."
They were definitely making progress. Between the decreasing number of trees, they saw several spires of rock sticking out into the skies. The orange and tan stuck out in a great contrast to the greens and browns of the neighboring rainforest, Whiskers giving this new, unfamiliar environment a scowl.
At least they have a landmark.
Brandy took a deep breath after finishing her sword explanation. "Wow, this is way too much walking. I don't even know where my own home is anymore!"
Homer gasped. "Oh no! She's fallen victim to delerium! Your home is in Florida! No- uh..."
Brandy plamed her face. "I meant the 'home' I set up back in the Amazon. Which I can call my temporary home now."
"We don't know that for sure!" Whiskers chuckled, "Come on buddy, stop acting like this is so final-"
They came to a stop after the dog cut away a number of shubbery, exposing the base of those tall pillars of rock:
Mountains, if at irregular shapes. Almost all of them had abrupt stopping points with long, flat tops, aside from the set few spikes pointing up. The same spikes visible from the end of the forest.
But this was hardly one of the top elements they noticed. For one thing, these mountains had giant cages around them. For another, there was a pair of metal poles leading up to a large billboard. That is, large even by billboard standards. From the akward angle and because of the size, they had trouble reading it, but Lisa eventually made it out and read it out to everyone else.
"Wel...come... to... Pig...man... City?"
Bart made several paces to the sign's front, trying to get as best of a view as possible. "No. Way. I thought this was just a myth that the schoolkids and crazy conspiricy people tell eachother! I never knew this would... well, be there!"
They paused.
"O...kay..." Marge finally said, "What's the 'myth?'"
Bart drew a deep breath in.
"Okay, they say that there are these giants somewhere. And this is, like a big tourist attraction for them. Or one of them. It's a zoo, for other freaky things as freaky as the giants!"
Whiskers laughed. "Wow, even I find that hard to believe! There's so many holes in it! How come those fancy space-views of the Earth don't show it?"
"I don't know, but if this is true, then maybe that thing about the Shadow People is too!"
Before he could continue, all six of them were met with a loud shake from the ground. Followed by another. Followed by another. These trembles were very frequent, almost as if they were matching one's walking pace-
And that turned out to be true. The stomps stopped just as they saw a giant pair of shoed feet to their side. Climbing up that appeared to be baggy blue jeans and a plaid-red shirt decorated with gold buttons. Up higher revealed his true swine-like appearance: He had the face of a grinning pig (obviously with a more humanoid body), and with a fittingly chubby appearance to go along with it. His hands, which were much more like a human's, were the only parts of his skin visible other than his head, and they were pink and thick as well. He cast a glance down at them, looking as though his massive eyes could barely see them from where he was at.
"MICROS!" His voice boomed, before blinking and giving a pointing finger to Whiskers. His grin, oddly, faded a little.
"Ah, Whiskers. That's your name, right? And the rest of you are with them? You're cool, I guess. Kind of a bummer, man. I was totally gonna have me some new specimens to put in my zoo."
"What." Whiskers said, surprisingly flatly. "Um, no, no, no, I think you have me confused for-"
Bart gasped. "It all makes sense now! The Shadow People are like this group of evil... demon things I think, or something like that, made of this strange purple goo. They are weak to this weird green water-looking stuff, so they build bases around some of the rare spots where it's at to try to hide it. And one of these spots is supposed to be around here! By Pigman City! And Pigman's kind has an alliance with the Shadow People, because he can help them... oh, right, eat souls! They eat souls!"
By the time he looked around, everyone was staring at him. Even Pigman, though probably for a different reason. Bart kicked at the dirt below, annoyed.
"Well, it's only what I heard."
Closing AN:
Believe it or not I was stuck on the ending part for... three days, I think.
