AN: Hi folks, this is a little one shot that I found myself compelled to write - just couldn't get the idea out of my head. It takes place about a month before the events of Redefining Shakespeare (A Rose) but can stand on it's own as a self contained story, although it does contain some spoilers for RS or at least some references. The question I found myself asking was 'how did Buzz find out/come to realise that Jo was in love with Blair?'. This story is my muse's answer to that question.
Warnings: Please note that there is some minor bad language used throughout this story, if this offends you then I apologise as that was not my intention. There is also some violence towards the end of the story, I in no way condone violence but am using it merely as a dramatic device. This is unbeta'd so may contain some errors, if it does then please just let me know and I'll do my best to fix them. Otherwise I'll fix them as I find them.
Implied FEMSLASH - if that's not your thing then you may want to skip this story and read one of the other excellent FOL stories on this site.
As usual the parts in italics represent flashbacks to Jo's past.
I'm working on a sequel to Redefining Shakespeare and hope to have the first chapter finished soon.
Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy the story.
Jaxx
...
'Our dreams are made of real things, like a shoebox full of photographs.'
Jack Johnson
Photographs:
'Is that ref blindfolded?!' Jo was on her feet along with every other true hockey fan in the Chug a Lug, there was just no way a body check like that was legal – it should have been a high sticking call at the very least goddamnit!
Returning to their table, a lucky find relatively close to the action, Buzz shouted his agreement. He hadn't seen the play but he knew Jo was right about this one – she always was. Setting an almost overflowing pitcher on the table beside the now empty one he sat contentedly, glancing back towards the action as Jo, suddenly elated when the 'injured party' had delivered his own monumental body check causing the offending player to crumple onto the ice behind his own blue line, retook her seat and reached for her beer happily, they had been waiting for this game all week – a real battle of New York. The ensuing melee on the ice had the desired effect creating a loose puck and their second real scoring chance of the match. It was almost like old times, except they weren't in the Bronx now and they didn't need fake IDs. Jo tended to avoid watching important matches with her roommates – they just didn't understand. Mrs G was a lost cause, screaming in apparent pain whenever a player was checked into the boards… Blair spent her time talking through the match, asking obvious questions or otherwise attempting to distract Jo from the game. Normally Jo didn't mind her roommate's attempts at distraction though she would never admit it to anyone; Blair Warner was her ultimate distraction and always had been but this was different. This was hockey – it was too important for pleasant distractions in the guise of unattainable, beautiful blonde debutantes! Then of course there was Tootie and Natalie. They understood the rules a little better than Blair or Mrs G. but spent most of the game admiring the more handsome players and their commentary therefore drove Jo crazy. Natalie in particular was hopeless, especially since she had recently discovered the new rookie centreman in Jo's latest issue of 'American Hockey and Arena', a player she now labelled 'the hunk on ice'. As a result Jo preferred watching the important games with Buzz while she was in Peekskill.
When they were kids Jo and her friends had spent a lot of time on the school roof listening to a radio that Buzz had 'borrowed' from his older brother, following the games, cheering over victory and commiserating with one another over defeat. If they were really lucky Uncle Ron, Calvin and Mitch would allow them to sit in their candy store long after the store had closed, nursing frothy milkshakes made by Aunt Mary as they all sat in awe of their favourite players. They were some of her favourite memories from her childhood even if thinking of them was painful at times. She missed them dearly. She dismissed that thought for another time, right now it was 'game time' and more importantly they were winning. The roar of the bar was headache inducing as that changed in the flick of a well-aimed wrist shot.
'How the hell did he miss that?!' Jo shouted in frustration at the goal tender on the screen.
'We got time Polniaczek, we're gonna get that one back…'
'We better… damn it! I coulda saved that!'
Jo was so intent on the action on the small screen that she barely registered Buzz pouring her another beer. If only she could afford to go to more games instead of watching them in the Chug a Lug or listening to them on the radio but it just wasn't possible, her scholarship covered tuition fees but she needed every cent she had to pay for books and make sure she had enough to give to Mrs G at the end of the month. She was lucky that she had enough left over to pay for her share of rounds, mainly because Buzz was in a similar situation. She knew that if she ever fell short with the rent Mrs G would give her time to make up the difference, hell her friend would probably let her away with it. That made it all the more important. Jo may be poor but she was proud and she knew how to prioritise – games at Madison Square Garden, or any other venue for that matter just weren't a priority, no matter how devoted she was in her support. Sitting in a crowded bar straining to see the action was the best she could do for now and it wasn't all bad, at least here there was a good atmosphere. Or there had been up until that lucky goal… now they were drawing 1-1, it was early in the game but damnit that shouldn't have happened so soon after their opening goal!
'Polniaczek! That was your round pal!' Buzz called over the noise of rowdy hockey fans determined to enjoy the battle between rivals, playfully teasing his best friend.
Jo tore her eyes from the game long enough to stand up and reach into the pocket of her jeans for her wallet before sliding it across the table in Buzz' general direction. Buzz shook his head in amusement as he caught it before it skidded off the end of the table, Jo's actions were not unexpected – like many aspects of her life when she was engrossed in a hockey match she became intense. It was easier to just take the wallet, take what she owed for the round and return to the game than argue with her. He didn't want to miss any more of the action. In truth he didn't mind, she trusted him and that was the main thing. As he took the money from the wallet however three photographs, carefully folded and a little worn fell out of it and onto the table. Jo was still shouting at the match, things were looking up for them from the sound of things. He was about to replace the photographs when his curiosity got the better of him. After all Jo had given him the wallet, though he knew she wouldn't expect him to look at these. He couldn't resist – he wanted to know who was so important that Jo would keep their pictures so close to her.
The first was from years ago and the conflicting emotions he experienced caught him completely off guard: Jo, Jessie and Gloria stood on the school roof proudly in their Diablo jackets. A lump formed in his throat, he remembered that day well – he'd been the one to take the picture. It had been a glorious day, the end of the best summer of their lives – the summer of 1979, and each of them was glowing as they smiled for the camera. They were so close, sisters in all but name. They always had been. The memory of it, of Gloria was almost overpowering but he didn't want Jo to realise something was up so swallowed back the raw emotion he felt and carefully refolded it placing it back into her wallet.
Unfolding the next one he realised it was from Jo's Eastland Graduation, she and Blair stood with their arms around one another smiling and laughing. He guessed there was nothing strange about that – Jo's graduation had been a proud moment for the whole neighbourhood and she had shared that day with her best friend, but something was off. They looked almost too close, not sisterly but more intimate. Their affection for one another shone through for all to see, maybe there was something more to it… but they were just friends, nothing more so Buzz didn't understand it - of all the pictures of her graduation why had Jo chosen to keep this one so close to her? He inwardly reprimanded himself, he was letting his imagination run away with him now; girls did that kind of thing – kept pictures of one another. Shrugging he opened the next, lovingly folded, picture fully expecting it to be of Jo's secret childhood sweetheart Hazel or maybe even Eddie Brennan, they had been engaged for a brief period and Jo had been upset when she'd had to end it with him. After everything they had been through realising that Jo just didn't love him was hard for Eddie and he had taken off, word from back home was that he was in training for the Marines but Buzz couldn't be sure about that. To be honest he didn't care, Eddie hadn't been right for Jo and Jo had always known that too. She'd told him that much over drinks just after their break up. He'd always figured she'd get back with Hazel eventually. The picture however was nothing like he had expected. It stunned him and at once confused and clarified his thoughts. Sixteen year old Blair Warner was looking right back at him her smile radiating from the small picture, this photograph was much smaller than the others, carefully trimmed and slightly faded yet her 'coconut oil' tan was still glowing, her natural beauty almost as striking as it was in person. Jo must have had this picture for a while. Now he was certain his interpretation of the previous picture was absolutely right.
'You done rakin through my wallet Ryan?' Jo's voice wasn't the harsh tone he had expected.
'I'm sorry pal… they fell out…' it was the truth but it sounded lame.
'Yeah…'
Buzz handed the pictures over without further comment. He'd screwed up, he shouldn't have been looking through those pictures – if Jo had wanted him to see them she'd have shown him them before now. He couldn't shake off the guilty feeling that came over him as she took each photograph in turn and with a final glance at each, an unreadably complex expression on her face, replaced them carefully before shoving her wallet into her pocket. Buzz waited for the inevitable, well deserved explosion. It never came.
'Look Buzz, don't mention those ta Blair ok?'
'Ya don't gotta ask pal. What's the deal though? I mean I sorta get the graduation picture…'
Jo sighed, took a deep swig of beer and made her decision. She'd been brave enough to tell her babcia – why shouldn't she tell her oldest childhood friend?
'It's complicated. She gave it ta me, first day I got ta Eastland…'
'What'd she give ya a picture for? Ain't that kinda weird?'
'Nah, it ain't what yer thinkin. She needed a fake ID… fer this place…'
'THAT's the photograph she wanted ta use? No wonder you guys got pinched!' Buzz doubled over. He remembered the phone call he'd received the day after it all kicked off. Jo Polniaczek certainly knew how to make a first impression. 'I still don't get why ya did that… We both know ya wanted ta stay outta trouble…'
A roar from the bar made them both look up – the Rangers had scored. This night was just warming up. When the uproar died down he turned to Jo expectantly, he'd always been curious about how that came about. Of course he'd had a few theories of his own at the time but he'd never mentioned them to her, things were tough enough at the time without asking about that kind of thing.
'I wanted ta stay outta trouble… believe me… but then I met Blair…'
'So what? Ya were tryin ta impress the richest girl in school?'
'Nah… I was tryin ta impress the prettiest girl I'd ever met…'
'Ye mean you and Blair are…'
'I wish… we're friends pal, nothin more…'
'You sure about that?'
'She's straight Buzz and I'm just a fool…' Jo's frustration was clear with each word.
'I'm sorry Jo… ya wanna talk 'bout it?'
…
Jo had come to Peekskill with the express intention of keeping her head down, working hard and making her Ma proud. She'd caused enough trouble to last a lifetime these last few months and being in Juvie had been hell on earth. Not because she couldn't handle it but because she could. Stuck in Juvie with the toughest girls in the city and she'd held her own for just over three months, she had known that if she continued on the path she was treading she'd be heading for prison. Hell if anyone found out the truth she'd be facing the chair – cop killers didn't get life sentences no matter their age… she was sure of that. All she wanted from her time at Eastland was a chance to get on with her life, quietly and without incident – that plan had failed spectacularly upon entering the building. She'd only been here for half an hour and already she was challenging the resident blonde airhead to break the rules and go with her to some dive bar… then again airhead definitely wasn't the right description at all. Not by a long shot. If she allowed herself time to explore her thoughts about this girl too hard she'd be in a whole world of trouble. She knew the reason behind such a stupid move on her part. That's why she wasn't about to think about it. Yet she couldn't help but acknowledge the fire that seemed to burst through her very soul when she'd first laid eyes on Blair Warner.
The moment Jo had spotted the pretty blonde, a girl whose smile lit up not just the room but seemingly the hearts of everyone around her, the leader of the Young Diablos had known she was in over her head. She'd never seen anyone so beautiful, so intriguing. The feelings flaring through her at first sight of the other girl scared her half to death. Not even Hazel made her feel like that and she still loved her more than she'd thought possible. Her fear had made her overly aggressive, she hated being talked down to and this girl had made her feelings perfectly clear - they were not on equal terms, it was her default setting and she'd been surprised by the intensity of the blonde's reaction. Jo had also been impressed despite her anger at being treated that way by a perfect stranger – not many people were willing to take on a Diablo, let alone a spoiled debutante like her new roommate. Those deep brown eyes had held a fury that Jo found herself drawn to, if Mrs G hadn't split them up Jo knew that neither of them would have backed down. Instead of a physical fight, which would have been preferable, Jo had found herself reeling from simply shaking her newfound nemesis' hand. Even as they'd continued sniping, instinctively she'd known that things were going to be complicated. Immensely complicated.
It was the complicated nature of the feelings flowing through her and the fact that she was determined to impress the girl who had caused her already tumultuous life to fall farther into the abyss that lay behind her current actions. Sitting in their room, working as fast as she could before an unannounced inspection or curious hall mate got nosy and caught her. Blair had finally chosen a picture from her extensive collection – who the hell carries pictures of themselves around anyway? Princess Barbie was now watching as Jo began the painstaking work of trimming the picture with a pocket knife and shaping it to fit into the space on the fake ID she always carried as a spare. A habit she'd gotten into since Gloria had always been losing hers or leaving it at her apartment. She hadn't made a fake ID since February and doing so know made her want to cry but she wasn't about to do that – she was Jo Polniaczek, leader of the Young Diablos and she wasn't about to cry in front of some debutante, no matter how beautiful she was. She concentrated hard, ignoring the slight trembling of her hand as she worked, this was an emotional job and she wasn't used to being watched so intently by a stranger.
'How long is this going to take? I promised to call Jeff at 6 O'clock…'
'It'll take as long as it takes doll… Who the hell's Jeff anyway?'
'Please don't call me that.' The steel in Blair's voice showed this was not a request despite the apparent politeness of delivery 'Jeffrey Thompson V is my beau… he's a senior at Bates Academy and he's going to Harvard after…'
'Too much information Barbie, all ya hadda say was he's yer boyfriend, I don't give a damn 'bout the rest…'
'You asked… and do you have to be so crude?'
'I damn well do have ta be so crude. I offendin ya or somethin Warner?'
Blair simply rolled her eyes at the brunette but Jo could see she was rattling her cage a little. That was a good sign, at least she wasn't the only one feeling rattled right now, even if blondie was rattled for a different reason. She had a feeling that annoying this girl was going to be her new hobby. Jo ignored the now huffing Blair in favour of concentrating on the task at hand, this was the trickiest part, if she misjudged the placing of the picture they'd be out on their asses as soon as the bouncers looked at it, she'd made that mistake once before and she wasn't about to make it again.
'Are you almost done?'
'Goddamnit blondie whyn't ya just get outta here if ya can't keep yer mouth shut?!'
'How dare you! Of all the…'
But Jo wasn't listening to her anymore; she'd managed to get the placement of the picture perfect and was now admiring her handy work.
'There ya go blondie, job done!'
…
'So ya got the picture from the fake ID? Why didn't ya give it back?'
'Mrs G. took the IDs from us once we got home that night…'
'So how'd ya…'
'Luck and timing…'
…
Her first night at this fancy school and she'd spent part of it in jail. Worst of all her Ma knew about it and she was livid. Instead of impressing the girl whose very presence made Jo feel more alive than she had in months, they'd been caught in spectacular style and now she was going to have to spend all of her time working in the kitchens instead of getting her own job and earning a little extra to send home. God how could she have been so stupid? Yet lying here on the floor listening to the sounds of her new roommates sleeping far from soundly Jo couldn't stop wondering what Mrs G. had done with those IDs. She'd be able to make herself another one, all she had to do was call Jessie and she'd send her the stuff she needed or she could wait until she went home next and get it herself so why was she losing sleep over it? Then it hit her… and she felt foolish, there was no way she was going to sneak around and try to find them now. Yet now was her best chance, if she waited until morning who knew what Mrs G. would have done with them – likely handed them over to the Principal or thrown them in the bin. She couldn't believe she was even thinking of doing this but checking to make sure her roommates were asleep she got up and tip toed out of the door closing it softly behind her, if anyone asked she'd just say she couldn't sleep or she was going to the bathroom or something.
She was halfway down the stairs when she thought she heard the sound of footsteps following her. Sighing she turned to find Tootie heading for the bathroom, in the soft moonlight her youngest roommate looked tired after their adventures and Jo hoped that would work to her advantage. Luck wasn't on her side however as Tootie suddenly realised it was her.
'Jo? You're not leaving are you?'
'Nah kid, I'm just gettin some water… you want anythin?'
'No thanks, I can't believe they're making us sleep on the floor…'
'Could be worse, we could be sleepin in the park… my Ma was this close ta disownin me tonight…'
'Yeah… My parents are gonna kill me…'
'They'll get over it…'
'I guess you know all about that huh? Trouble I mean…'
'Trouble seems ta follow me kid… anyways I'm kinda thirsty so better get down ta the kitchen before we wake Mrs G.'
Tootie headed towards the bathroom as Jo continued her journey downstairs. Now she'd have only around five minutes before the curious Snoop Sister would follow her. She had to think fast. Where would Mrs G have put those IDs?
…
'I don't get it though, why'd ya want her picture so bad?'
'I was gonna give it back ta her… ya know I figured she'd thought that was her best picture and I felt like an ass that she'd lost it cos of me…'
'That's all there was to it?'
'That's all I wanted ta think there was to it…'
'Jesus Jo, sometimes I think ya make things too damn complicated…' Buzz replied, pouring more beer into each of their glasses.
'Yer right about that…'
…
It had taken longer than she'd hoped but eventually she'd found them. Mrs G. had stuffed them into a bureau at the bottom of the stairs. They had been tucked away in a drawer but Jo had, after searching the living room and kitchen, found the small drawer unlocked. She left her own ID where it was but she fiddled with Blair's until she'd managed to get the picture unstuck, using her pocket knife to cut it free and then putting the rest back inside the drawer. She knew she'd probably get into trouble for this. Mrs G. would know who had taken the picture but she didn't care. There was no sign of Mrs G. and with a little luck she wouldn't even notice the picture was gone, Jo was tempted to rescue her own picture but thought better of it, if both were gone Mrs G. would definitely know something was up. With only one missing it might just appear they were badly made and the picture had fallen out.
She tread carefully on the stairs, stealthily, she was used to stealth – the element of surprise was always a useful tool where she came from and she had already memorised the creaky steps. Reaching the top she thought for a second that she heard her new guardian moving around her room but as she glanced towards the woman's bedroom door she realised the lights were out. Relieved she made it into her room and managed to get to her sleeping bag without tripping over Blair who was rolling around in hers trying to get comfortable. Natalie and Tootie were asleep now and their soft puttering was the only sound in the room as she settled down. It had been a long day, she needed some sleep.
'I thought you'd gone…'
The soft voice from the blonde beside her startled her, giving her goose bumps.
'Ya scared me half ta death blondie whatcha tryin ta do?' she whispered, it came out less harsh then she had expected.
'Sorry. I just felt bad… I thought you were running away…'
'Why'd you care?'
'I honestly don't know… maybe because you protected me tonight and I didn't thank you for it.'
Jo was glad it was dark, she didn't want her roommate to see that her cheeks had flushed pink with that comment. It was stupid, all the girl was doing was thanking her.
'Don't mention it Princess, I couldn't let that bitch hurt ya…'
'Why… you hate me…'
'I honestly don't know…' Jo's echo of the other girl's words caused them both to smile just a little in the darkness. 'I got yer picture back… you know… in case ya need it fer something…'
'Thank you… but you didn't have to…'
'I know but… look it's no big deal I just thought you might want it back…'
…
Both of them were so focused on the conversation at hand that they barely noticed the next goal or the angry cries from the bar when their Captain was called for being offside. Things were heating up on the ice but for now neither cared, Jo had never told anyone about the photographs, she was glad it was Buzz she was telling – of all of her friends he understood.
'So she didn't take it back?'
'She did… dunno what happened ta it after, I think she gave it ta that dumb boyfriend of hers or somethin…'
'How'd you get it then?'
'Gimme a break! I'm gettin ta that part… it happened about a month later...'
…
Jo was walking back from French class when she spotted the familiar blue and white Chrysler, brand new and no doubt paid for in full, sitting on the school driveway just outside Mrs G's. Great, Blair's dumbass boyfriend was here, that's all she needed. She and Blair were supposed to be preparing a presentation for English class after dinner but she was willing to bet that was no longer on the cards. Dumbass would probably be taking Blair to the movies or something after dinner which meant that she and the other girls would have to suffer through tales of Jeff the wonderful all through their chores until they agreed to let her go early to get ready for her date, leaving them to deal with cold potatoes and mooshed up macaroni… Jo wondered why Blair felt the need to take so long getting ready – the girl was simply stunning and any guy would give his right arm to take her out, Jo just didn't get it but then she'd never been one for trying to impress guys. She had to admit though this particular guy had good taste in cars, what she wouldn't give to be able to drive around in one of those Chryslers… it was while she was staring after the car longingly that she heard voices coming from inside it… angry voices. The car was rocking a little too, almost like there was a lot of movement inside the car. It couldn't be! Blair wasn't that kind of girl…
'Let me out of this car!' Blair's voice was unmistakable
'Come on babe we've been goin steady for a month now…'
'I said no… Jeff!'
Jo dropped her school books and took off at a run towards the car, she didn't even stop to think about what she was doing, she hated the idea that this guy was doing something to Blair. She found herself slamming her open palm against the driver's window.
'Let her outta the car asshole…'
Jo's presence seemed to stop all movement inside the car until slowly Jeff, who at that moment had been trying to force the issue with Blair by pressing her into the passenger door, backed off.
'This don't concern you Polniaczek…'
'Let her outta the car…'
'Or what? What're you going to do?'
'Open the door or you'll find out…'
Jeff seemed to be considering his options and he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel before opening the doors of the car, allowing Blair to make her escape. Seeing Blair rushing from the car Jo took the opportunity she'd been waiting for and in one fluid move she had the driver door open and Jeffrey Thompson V found himself lying half inside the car, half on the driveway, Jo's arm around his throat while using the seatbelt as a makeshift noose in a move that defied logic but created all kinds of pain.
'Now you listen ta me Thompson… I don't give a damn who ya are or who yer family are, ya ever go near Blair Warner again you'll have me ta answer to. If ya even think of speakin ta her in so much as a friendly manner I'll hunt ya down like the dog ya are and when I'm through they'll be draggin the Hudson lookin fer ya…'
'You're nuts Polniaczek…'
'That's what they all say… Now I'm gonna let ya go and yer gonna get up, get inta yer car and drive away like this whole thing never happened. If ya try anythin stupid you'll see how nuts I really am. We clear?'
Jeff remained quiet, seemingly stunned that a girl who was both younger than him and should have been much weaker had managed to get him into this position. A tightening sensation around his throat brought him back to the present.
'I said are we clear?'
Jeff was too astounded to reply. He wasn't sure why but something in her blazing green eyes told him that she meant every word she'd said. He nodded his understanding, he didn't want to piss her off more - there was no telling what she might do.
'Good… now get the hell outta here…'
Jeff struggled to get back inside the car and seemed to be considering his options, his face was bright red, his eyes watering from the shock and pain, coughing uncontrollably. It only took a few minutes to make up his mind, he grabbed the door, slammed it shut and within seconds the Chrysler was speeding into the distance. Once he was gone Jo reflected on the stupidity of her actions, she could have handled that better. She was probably going to be expelled for this. She shouldn't have gotten involved, she should have gone for Mrs G or something… then she noticed something on the concrete, a small photograph, she picked it up and had to smile – Blair Warner, her smile lighting up the whole world, her coconut oil tan making her look even more stunning. She didn't have time to dwell on finding it because she suddenly found herself with her arms full of the gorgeous blonde who pulled her into a grateful hug.
'Thank you Jo, I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't…'
'Don't mention it, I couldn't let that bastard hurt ya… even if ya do drive me crazy…'
Blair laughed at that before kissing her roommate lightly on the cheek. Oh yeah,whatever the consequences it was definitely worth it Jo decided. Definitely worth it.
'That's the second time you've saved me…'
'I was just passin by…'
Blair hugged her once more before grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the house. Jo for once allowed herself to be dragged along, she'd only been in Eastland a month and already she was in over her head.
…
'Wow that's some story Jo! I can't believe you've been in love with Blair all this time and ya never said…'
'I didn't say I was in love with her…'
'Ya didn't have ta pal, I got eyes, I see exactly how ya feel.'
'Not that it matters… she's straight, she's my best friend… she's unattainable…'
'I'm sorry pal… Whatcha gonna do?'
'Same thing I've done for the last five years… not a damn thing…'
In the background distant cheers rang out. The game was over.
