Note: This takes place a few weeks after the Chrismukkah That Almost Wasn't and Caleb is trying to get to know Lindsay. I originally posted this as "Out of Control" but I edited it so it's more conclusive and it fits under the PG-13 rating. Caleb has just learned that Lindsay and Ryan are together, but Renee and Kirsten have both known for awhile. Please RnR!


A tense silence filled the Cohen's kitchen. This hadn't been the casual lunch gathering that Kirsten had hoped for. Seth sat by Ryan and was looking very uncomfortable. Kirsten glared at Caleb, who was glaring at Ryan. Lindsay looked back and forth between her "father" and her boyfriend, before examining her mother's exasperated expression. Caleb's deep voice shattered the silence. "Lindsay, you are not allowed to see Ryan."

"What?" Lindsay objected stepping closer to Caleb.

He flinched, taken aback by the anger he saw in his youngest daughter, then continued to glare at Ryan. "Stay away from her. You're a bad influence."

"Caleb," Renee began, but she was quickly cut off as Caleb turned to end any argument that she may have about this situation.

"I will not let you ruin your future with this boy." His voice held a fatherly tone and Lindsay hated him for it.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Ryan asked stepping in front of Lindsay, protectively.

"It means that no daughter of mine is going…"

Lindsay's anger nearly boiled over as she fought the urge to slap him. "Excuse me? Your daughter? You think you can send my mom a check every month and that makes you my father?"

Her words hit Caleb hard, but he hid it well. "I'm not going to let you risk everything you've worked so hard for just so you…" he turned to Ryan and blushed not wanting to say it. "We all know where you were last summer. I won't let Lindsay become another…" he paused looking for a word he could bring himself to say "conquest…to you."

"You think that's what's going on between us?" Ryan asked angrily.

Seth whispered so that only Ryan and Lindsay could hear him. "Dude, you said you want to see her naked." Ryan blushed and Lindsay giggled softly, trying to hide her amusement.

Kirsten had been silent up until that moment, but she couldn't stay silent anymore. "Dad, do not talk to my son like that!" Kirsten hadn't meant to call him her son, because even though she considered him her son, he had a 'real' mother that she had no intention of trying to replace. When she turned to look at the expression of trust and love that she'd never seen out of Ryan before, she decided that maybe it was something she should have voiced a long time ago.

"Kiki, he got her pregnant! She wasn't ready to be a mother anymore than he was ready to be a father. He was selfish and irresponsible!"

Renee raised her eyes to meet Caleb's, and once he heard the words, they hung heavily in the air and on his heart. "Sound familiar?" Bitterness saturated her tone. "Except Ryan didn't run from his mistake."

With a death glare at Caleb, Kirsten walked towards Ryan and placed her hand on his shoulder. Her face softened. "As much as I hated you leaving, I've never been so proud of you." Ryan looked puzzled as Kirsten continued. "You made a mistake, but you did everything you could to take responsibility and be there for Theresa. You sacrificed everything to take care of her and a baby that may or may not have been yours."

Ryan didn't say anything. His voice had stopped working, and he felt a twinge of sadness for the child he'd lost. Lindsay looked at Ryan, taking in the information. She knew he'd been in Chino with a friend/ex-girlfriend that was pregnant with his child, but she'd never considered what he had been giving up, or that the child may not be his. Her adoration for him spread to her hormones and her eyes ran over his defined jaw, watching as he opened his mouth to speak. He turned to Caleb with determination. "I made a mistake. I should have been more careful and I shouldn't have been with her in the first place. But Mr. Nichol, I can promise you that that isn't going to happen with Lindsay. If you don't trust me, fine, you should trust her."

"I can't allow this," Caleb stated firmly, although Renee nodded at Lindsay, letting her know that she did trust her, even if Caleb didn't.

"Caleb, I know that Ryan is sort of your grandson, and I've just met him, but do you know him at all?" Renee waited for an answer from Caleb, but he said nothing. "All I know is that he's been there for Lindsay." Lindsay blushed, hoping her mom wouldn't go into detail about what she'd told her about her relationship with Ryan. "He's been such a wonderful friend to her, and that's why I trust him to respect her."

Caleb was beginning to show some desperation. "Renee, you don't know anything about that boy's past."

"And you do?" Kirsten asked her father bitterly.

"I know he burned down one of my houses, taught Seth how to steal cars, and ruined my man of the year party."

It was Seth's turn to speak up. "That fire was an accident. Ryan was there because I didn't want to lose the first friend I've ever had in Newport. Luke and a bunch of other guys came to fight Ryan, and somewhere in there, some candles got knocked over…"

Caleb directed his attention back to Ryan. "Why were you even fighting with Luke? I've always thought he was such a good kid."

Seth and Ryan both choked back laughter and Seth started to say, Your wife is rather fond of him also, but Ryan silenced him with a glare. Seth continued, "Ryan and Luke are buddies now, no one was hurt in the fire, and insurance took care of it. And what makes you think Ryan taught me how to steal cars?"

"Where else would you have learned how to do that?"

Seth almost laughed out loud. "Grandpa, I took your keys and stole your car. Correct me if I'm wrong Ryan, but I don't think that's how they do it in Chino."

Ryan shrugged. "Trey was trying to teach me when we got caught, so I never really learned. But I know he didn't usually have keys."

"Trey?" Caleb questioned.

"Ryan's brother," Seth answered. "His other brother…his biological brother."

"Ah, and where is Trey now? The same place Ryan should be?"

"Dad, that's enough!" Kirsten shouted. "Ryan is right where he belongs, with us."

Caleb's anger matched Kirsten's. "Lindsay, Ryan, you two aren't seeing each other anymore and that's final."

"This has nothing to do with you, Mr. Nichol." Lindsay's eyes were so cold that Caleb felt as if he'd been punched in the stomach.

"Lindsay, please, call me Caleb."

Her eyes were tearing up. "For as long as I can remember I've wished for a father, or man to prove that some of you are trustworthy and some really do care. That's what a girl is supposed to see in her father. You took that away from me once. I'm not going to let you take it away again."

Caleb didn't catch on to the fact that she was referring to Ryan, not him. "But I'm here now, Lindsay, and I'm not going anywhere. Give me a chance to be your father."

"Then don't make me choose between you and Ryan, Mr. Nichol," she shot back, deliberately denying his request for her to call him Caleb.

"There's no choice here. I'm your father and I'm doing what's best for you. And please Lindsay, please, call me Caleb."

Her anger was getting harder and harder to control, and so she put him on the spot. "Why doesn't Ryan call you Caleb?" This was something she'd been wondering for awhile. While he didn't call Sandy and Kirsten, mom and dad, he clearly considered them his parents. She'd seen Ryan interact with Kirsten enough to see that she loved him as if he was her own son; she'd even called him her son earlier. She couldn't figure out why Ryan had to address his foster grandfather so formally and why he always seemed to be walking on eggshells around the man.

"He's my grandson's friend. You're my daughter." Kirsten couldn't help but roll her eyes.

"I haven't been your daughter for 16 years, why am I suddenly your daughter now?" She paused, meeting his gaze head on. "I'm not your daughter. I'm your grandson's friend's girlfriend, and that's it, Mr. Nichol." She was exasperated and she couldn't take anymore of this conversation. Grabbing Ryan's hand, she turned and walked out to the pool house.

Once they were inside, she closed the door and all the blinds, planning to pounce on him as soon as possible. But as soon as the task was completed, she collapsed on his bed, emotionally exhausted.

"Wow," Ryan sighed, lying down beside her and gathering her in his arms.

"Ryan, I am so sorry about all that." She snuggled up against him as his hand gently stroked her hair.

"It's not your fault." He went over the ordeal in his mind. Despite the sting of Caleb's insults, Ryan felt good. Kirsten had called him her son, Renee had said she trusted him, and Lindsay had stood up to Caleb for him. It was a new feeling. He was falling for Lindsay, faster and faster, and right now, he felt a connection with her that he'd never felt before. It wasn't just sexual and it wasn't just some girl who was around. It was a trust, an understanding, and an emotional, physical, and spiritual connection. He actually loved just hanging out and talking with her. She made him want to do everything in his life better. And yes, he'd pictured her naked many times, and she'd been the center of his fantasies since they'd met a few months ago. He gazed at her as if he was trying to memorize her features.

She looked up at him, and found his gaze to be somewhat unnerving. "What?"

His hand lightly caressed her cheek, brushing her hair out of her face. "Lindsay…I…" She looked at him expectantly. "I love you."

She stared at him speechless and he was desperately hoping she would say the words back to him. "Wow…Uh…Wow. I…" she wanted to say it, but she couldn't make the words come out of her mouth. "Thank you."

While it wasn't the answer he'd hoped for, she hadn't turned away, so that was something. Recalling this same situation with Marissa, and how he'd felt then, he smiled at her and let his lips softly brush against hers, assuring her that he understood and that it was okay.

When he pulled back, she jumped up off the bed and began pacing around the room. "Ryan…" She seemed completely tongue-tied and his heart hung in the air. She would either take it or break it. "I'm not very good at…you know…" She watched as his eyes sparkled with hope, and she knew she had to somehow get the words out. They pounded in her chest and filled her mouth but they wouldn't come out. "Talking about feelings and stuff…I don't…I have so much fun when we're together and, and it's like there's this attraction…" His face twisted in confusion as she rambled on.

He walked towards her, placing his hands on her shoulders to calm her down. "Lindsay," he gently interrupted her tangent, which had somehow gotten to chemical reactions.

She stopped and met his eyes. "I love you," she said softly and smoothly, but she quickly reverted to her usual speech patterns. "Of course I do, Ryan. I don't even know how to explain the way you make me feel, but…I'm doing it again. I'm really not good at this whole talking thing. Well at least not talking coherently." She blushed and turned away from him to look out the window, searching for something to distract her from his eyes that seemed to be seeing right through her. However, the blinds were all drawn and provided little distraction.

Stepping behind her, he rested his chin on her shoulder and ran his hands down her arms, sending tingling sensations jolting through her body, before his hands closed around hers. "Well, I know of something we can do that doesn't involve a lot of talking," he whispered into her ear seductively. She trembled as she took in the words and sensations. He'd said those same words to her the first night that they kissed, and they'd wound up playing video games together. She knew that this would be very different.

She couldn't take her eyes off his as she felt the warmth of his hand on the small of her back. His lips touched hers, very softly at first. Then he nibbled at her lips, teasingly. When he felt her lean into him, he deepened the contact by touching his tongue to hers. She ran her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, and pulled him closer, allowing their tongues to freely explore each other as the moment intensified. Ryan leaned down and kissed her neck. He made a trail of kisses to her shoulder, where he slid her top aside. Although his control was rapidly dwindling, he took his time savoring her exposed shoulder with his lips. He tenderly kissed along her collarbone and stopped when he reached the hollow of her throat. He lightly flicked his tongue over the sensitive skin and dared to move a little lower. She softly whimpered, and he immediately stopped and looked up at her. His entire body felt weak, and he stuttered, "Sorry, I got a little…"

She placed her finger over his lips, stopping his words.

Ryan's eyes darkened as he smiled at her. He reached over and flipped the lock, lightly pushing her up against the door with his hands on either side of her head as he kissed her with built up passion. She groaned, savoring the feeling of his body against hers, and began pushing him towards the bed.

Ryan hadn't really noticed that they'd been moving until his legs hit the edge of the bed and he fell down with Lindsay on top of him. Her boldness surprised him, but she was going on instinct, and he reciprocated. She gasped when she felt his hands moving up the inside of the back of her shirt. Slightly hesitant at first, she moved her hand down his side until she reached the bottom of his shirt. She reached up inside his wifebeater and gently ran her fingernails over his lower back. When he trembled at her touch, she moved her hands down further, to the top of his pants.

Suddenly Ryan rolled out from under her and jumped up. "We can't do this."

She looked him up and down, with an amused expression, her eyes lingering briefly. "It looks to me like we can."

With a small smile, a deep blush covered his cheeks and he sat down beside her on the bed, shifting to make his arousal less visible and keeping a safe distance. "I don't want to do anything that you're going to regret later, and Caleb said-"

"I don't care what Caleb said, Ryan."

"But your mom said she trusts me. What if-"

"She trusts you to respect me and to be careful. Do you…have one?"

He hadn't left his room without one in almost a year. "Yeah, but that's not a hundred percent."

"Don't worry, we've got back up." It took a moment for the statement to sink in and when it did, Ryan looked at her in surprise. Seeing the question in his mind, she explained, "My mom insisted. She didn't want me to wind up in the same situation that she did."

He nodded, feeling a bit taken aback. "Have you ever…before?" He was pretty sure he knew the answer, but he didn't want to jump to conclusions.

"No. I've never been with a guy long enough for it to go past kissing."

His eyes widened. "You haven't?" His eyes skimmed over her face and her body before returning to her eyes. He almost said that he thought a girl as beautiful as her would have to fight guys off with a stick, but realizing how much that sounded like a lame line, he decided against it.

She shook her head. "I went on dates, but..." she paused and looked up into his eyes. "Until I met you, I'd never really wanted a guy in my life before."

Her words seemed to tug at his heart. He was overwhelmed with desire as he gazed at her, keeping space between them. "Oh," he said with a smile, suddenly feeling a bit unsure of himself. He had plenty of experience with sex, but he'd never been anyone's first, not even Theresa's, and it had never been accompanied by love. As he watched her sitting beside him, breathing heavily, his uncertainties began to fade away. Silence hung in the air as they both tried to fight the sexual tension that was growing, but it was useless. In one swift movement, their lips came together as if they were being controlled by a magnetic force. Ryan's hands roamed her back, seeking for the control that was quickly sliding away from him.

The rate at which he reacted to her touch surprised him, even though it'd been a long time since he'd been with anyone. It'd been nearly a year ago, and that was the only time since he'd moved to Newport. After much foreplay, when all clothes were lying in a heap on the floor and neither of them could take any more, Ryan reached over to his nightstand, then rolled back towards Lindsay.

He looked into her eyes, and raised his eyebrows in question. She nodded, granting her consent. After making sure she was ready, he looked down into her eyes to find that she looked a little unsettled. "Don't worry," he whispered, his voice husky. "We'll take this nice and easy."

She visibly relaxed beneath him. She was still slightly nervous but she felt safe and secure, and that was something she'd never felt with any other man.


"Kirsten, are you going to just let this happen?"

Renee had gone home shortly after her daughter had stormed out of the kitchen, Seth had retreated to his room, and Kirsten and Caleb sat in the kitchen in a tense silence. "Let what happen?"

"Whatever's going on in that pool house."

The thought was somewhat irking to Kirsten, but she remembered when her father had forbidden her to see Sandy. "Dad, they're going to do what they want to do. Lindsay's a big girl. She can take care of herself." When Caleb didn't say anything, Kirsten moved towards him slightly. "Why don't you go home?"

"Fine," Caleb grumbled, walking out the door.


Several hours later, Lindsay awoke to the smell of bacon, pancakes, and eggs. Ryan stood in the doorway and she saw that it was dark outside. "What time is it?"

"Almost 10. I figured you'd probably be hungry since we sort of slept through dinner, and since you'll probably have to go home tonight, I knew I couldn't make you breakfast in bed tomorrow..." Lindsay blushed furiously, but before she could voice her concerns, Ryan gave her a reassuring smile. "The Cohens are out for the evening."

"I see," she nodded with a smile.

"Um…how are you?" Ryan asked nervously.

"Good! I'm good. I mean…was that okay?"

Ryan's eyes darkened as he stared at her and pulled her to him for a tender kiss. "Amazing." She blushed again and smiled. She'd been questioning if she was doing things right, but he had guided her gently, learning what she liked and showing her what he wanted. "Was it okay for you?" he asked anxiously.

At times it'd been slightly painful and sort of awkward, but to her, it was perfect. The look on Ryan's face as he'd found his release, the way he'd moaned her name, and the words he'd whispered to her as he lost the ability to think, made it absolutely amazing, and he'd seen to it that she was satisfied as well. "It was wonderful."

Ryan smiled affectionately as she chewed on a piece of bacon, and turned to his own plate. When they had both finished eating, she turned to him with a slightly sad look on her face. "So I guess…I should go home now?"

"I can take you home if you want," he replied, "but I was kind of hoping we could just stay here for awhile."

Lindsay beamed and her face seemed to light up the room. She placed her tray on the floor and lied down. Ryan snuggled up behind her, kissing her neck before drifting off to sleep.