fandom - Gravitation
title - tsubasa
pairing - nuriko + mika, tohma + mika, hint of tatsuha + ryuichi
rating - pg
description – How did Mika and Nuriko become best friends? (Note: Some shoujo-ai.)
Disclaimer - Gravitation and Ultraman aren't mine.
tsubasa. (wings.)
By miyamoto yui
In one single glance, their eyes always seemed to fall upon another at the same time.
The girl wearing the pressed uniform complete with the navy blue tie walked through the bright green park with an expressionless face. The only time she turned to notice her surroundings was when she was about to pass that fountain. Though, surprisingly, it was just an ordinary cement fountain that anyone could have easily forgotten in an eyecatch between episodes in the scenes of life.
At that moment, there was a girl with pinkish-lavender hair that began her picture show, like those men that would travel around the nation after the second world war. They would try to make the children smile by telling a story behind the 'screen' and placed the painted, child-like pictures in front of the other as the story progressed.
But everyone knew, a child could only paint the way they innocently saw the world as adults dimly sketched what could be salvaged from their consciousness about 'reality'.
In a blink, the high schooler's eyes filled with a curious expression that was caught between fascination and being weirded out. She stopped in her place without turning her whole body. Her eyes were caught by the gathering of rambunctious children who fell silent at the pink-lavender haired girl's index finger touching her lips.
"I have to go home, though…" she mumbled to her, trying to convince herself in a decisive tone that that was most important…
…even if her heart told her to stay put.
In a big voice, the speaker's words made their way into the girl's ears, striking right into her heart:
"The penguin looked at the sun and thought, 'It's so cold here even if there's sun. Why can't we get out of here?'
As we all know, other birds can fly, but the penguin can't. Did he know that though? We don't know because he'd never seen other birds before. But he didn't have to see them to know. Through the ice and within his dreams, there were those that could fly. For sure, there were.
Everyone laughed at him. A penguin that could fly? What do you want to do that for?"
Frozen, frozen, the high schooler quickly walked away, but as she was about to, the speaker rose up in the middle of the performance and said, "Well, you'll have to find out tomorrow, now won't you?"
The kids groaned, but when the speaker's eyes looked up, she saw someone with the same uniform as hers. She smiled and nodded her head forward.
Not knowing what to do, brown long-haired girl bowed her head and quickly walked away without looking back. She had to get home before any of her brother's caused any more trouble for the day.
There wasn't ever a day that would be 'just hers'.
++/++/++/++
"Mika~!"
When she got to the doorway, her father was a little perturbed as he hastily gave the two-year-old Tatsuha to Mika's hands before she could even take off her shoes at the genkan. She blinked as Tatsuha gave her a toothy smile while pulling gently on her hair, amused at the little knots that tied themselves up when she ran home from school.
The sweat poured down her face as she huffed and puffed when her father said that this current appointment was very important. He had to get there and would have to take a special trip that meant he'd be there overnight. This automatically meant she'd be left with her two younger brothers.
And because no one from their family really wanted to associate with the two little brats for one reason or other, she was the only one who could take care of them. Yes, all by herself.
"Eiri!" she called when her father held her shoulder and sighed telling her not to get stressed out and that all the numbers were on the table.
"Yes." She nodded.
'Yes', as if empty words would help at all. You could fill a cup with water but it didn't exactly satisfy your thirst.
Eiri came to the front and Mika gave Tatsuha to the nine-year-old who hesitantly took the bundle into his hands. "You should stop being so spoiled, Tatsuha. Sometimes, you need to walk too."
Tatsuha looked up with a dubious expression and put all his fingers to his mouth. He shook his head as he crunched his eyes tightly. "No way!" his whole body protested.
Mika tied her hair up with a rubberband before she took off her shoes while Eiri dragged Tatsuha by the hand to the living room. It wasn't the easiest of things to do, but Tatsuha, strangely, always obeyed Eiri. For better or for worse he seemed to idolize his blond, older brother.
When she came to the living room, she rolled up her sleeves and immediately put Tatsuha onto her lap while sitting next to Eiri, who was trying to finish his homework spread out on the table. He couldn't work without seeing everrryyything out before him. He said it made his mind less cluttered that way to actually what he had to do, so he described in nine-year-old terms.
Tatsuha was given his Ultraman juice cup while he turned the pages of his picture book. It was the one that Eiri especially made for him (laminated with Mika's help) about a little boy who loved rock music, which was about Tatsuha himself. Tatsuha was a little egocentric that way. ^^;;;;; What more, the idol was characterized after a boy who used to babysit them before he went to Los Angeles.
As Mika helped supervise Eiri's homework, she made notes on what she had to get done for the day. Her planner was always filled with club activities as well as appointments and homework. With separate filler pages, there was a bright colored sheet each day just for home.
"Ah! Laundry…" she mumbled while filling in a Saturday slot. Then, got up and hugged Tatsuha as she gently pulled the cup away from his mouth (which he started to bite) and the book from his hands. "It's time for you to take a nap."
"No! Don't want." He scrunched his face up and shook his head as she hugged him while bringing him over to the small futon brought out for him since he hated to sleep alone. He always needed to know that someone was there with him.
Mika sighed as she shook her head holding him, but she couldn't help but smile. "You little imp."
So, as she positioned herself next to him, she placed her book out. While holding him close and patting him, once in a while, she'd let go to turn a page in her book while trying not to fall asleep. Tatsuha's eyes grew heavy and she whispered into his ear, "Yup, that's it. Time to sleep, Tatsu."
She continued to pat him as Eiri called out. "I'm done. Can you look over the answers, Onee-chan?"
He looked at her and she nodded her head quickly. Slowly, she detached herself from Tatsuha and walked over to Eiri. She patted him on the head and nodded.
"You're so smart, Eiri." Her hand ran through his hair affectionately.
At least he knew all the answers to the questions he was asked…
They ate dinner that night and Eiri washed the dishes as she did her homework on the table. Trying to rush through all the short answers, English exercises, and calculations, she tried not to be distracted by the look of that girl at the park, but even so, her mind would wander for a few seconds. Those two eyes were very demanding yet transparent at the same time. They were like marbles that aimed right at their target without faltering in their haste to shoot.
Mika couldn't understand if she admired or cowered before them.
Before she knew it, she missed the phases of the sun and the moon in getting from one place to another without a split-second to appreciate the sky. It was getting late and Eiri once again slept on her shoulder. She carried him to his bed and went back to Tatsuha, who was waking up. He had the weirdest sleeping schedule than any 2 year-old she ever knew.
"Are you normal?" But after setting up a videotape to a mock concert of her classmates, she placed him on her lap. As she read for her history test, the concert played and Tatsuha waved his arms with the concert. Once in a while, she'd raise her eyebrow at how attentive and intense he got whenever he watched this singer. It was the only thing that ever made him really focused.
Before she knew it, Tatsuha crawled out of her lap and patted the screen at the face of her classmate named Ryuichi, the one that used to babysit Eiri and Tatsuha. She was taken aback, but was a little too tired to react. She was one second away from sleeping while sitting up.
It was 11:57 and she wasn't even finished writing her paper about what she wanted to do in the future.
"The future? I don't even know what I'm doing tomorrow."
Sleeping on the floor with Tatsuha on her chest, she had one arm over him after pulling the small blankie over them. She'd worry about the paper in the morning.
Tatsuha looked up at her and patted her heart softly before his eyes drooped, wishing he could sing that song that he loved so much to his big sister.
++/++/++/++
And just like that, her days passed slowly yet quickly at the same time. It was already January and that paper was out of her memory as fast as a rushing river with no dams to stop its flow.
But for once, she put the two boys to sleep and sat at her desk. She sat there after closing the last book she had to study with for that night. At last, one night that she could enjoy even just for a little bit. Because, again in the morning, there would be no time to breathe with Eiri and their father fighting over his 'gaijin' features and Tatsuha's incessant want for attention in the form of being hugged without paying attention to anything else in the world but him.
Mika sighed and opened the middle desk drawer to pull out a purple journal out. She opened it and laughed to herself. "It's been that long since I've written here?"
Then, instead of going to sleep, she wrote:
"Pat, pat. Pat, pat, pat.
I sighed as I patted the erasers out the window, trying my best not to get it on my uniform. I only had one! When I turned my back, the people were already gone. They'd already finished their things, or had they left it all to me? I wanted to shout but I was too resigned to give a fight anymore. It just took too much energy. I wondered what were the true responsibilities of my fellow classmates. One could only wonder. They were all concerned over getting with someone or cram school.
Me? I just felt like I was losing every battle that came my way. It's almost pathetic.
But when I glanced at the open doorway again, there was that girl from the park. I wanted to ask what she was doing in my classroom, but she took the mop into her hands and started to wipe around the desks without a word.
'Aren't you supposed to be over there? At the park, I mean? Wasn't that you?' I blurted out in that impatient, arrogant way that I always spoke in. It was the kind of way that made people scared of me because they thought I was so intimidating, especially since I was only second to Seguchi Tohma.
Her eyes stared straight at mine. I don't know how to describe the expression. It was understanding yet not so. All I knew was that we were similar in a way, but I was too busy to think a second later.
'Oh that? I only do it certain days of the week. I don't do it everyday.' She smiled as she mopped away behind me.
I just continued to pat the erasers with that strange girl in back of me, but it felt nice to have someone help me even though she didn't have to.
'Why do you do that kind of thing?' I asked and then coughed, rubbing my nose with my finger. 'Isn't it hard to always think of something new?'
'I do it because I can become anything when I'm in front of those children.' Without looking into my eyes, she continued to mop.
I turned my face towards her. What a straightforward answer.
I wish I could speak so freely as that.
'If you could spare me five minutes of your time, Miss Uesugi, I'll make a story just for you.' The girl looked at me and put the mop to the wall. She took bands out of her hair and pulled my hair into a ponytail. "Hiding that pretty face of yours behind everything, you'll never learn to shine your brightest."
Then, when her gentle fingers let go, the tingly in my hair went away and she was gone.
Before I could say anything even though my mouth was open, my childhood friend came into the classroom. He usual stoic face had a tender grin on it. 'You know Nuriko?'
'Who?' I impatiently took the erasers to the blackboard.
He may have been my childhood friend because he was my next door neighbor, but I didn't want to deal with him right now. There was no room for feelings if I wanted to get out of this life.
I didn't want to listen to the people who said I had to help with the temple until my brothers were old enough to inherit it or that was beautiful. I didn't believe their words because the were just puffs of air to fill up the spaces of polite silence.
'The girl that was just in here.'
I shook my head. 'She just came in and then she left.' I looked at the floor to avoid his eyes, but before I knew it, he sat on a desk and comfortably grabbed my waist from behind. I ended up sitting on his lap.
'Stop it! What if someone comes and finds us like this?' I fumed and looked at him with a glare.
'So?' he said as he sighed, then he looked down at the ground with his hands still folded over one another. My heart was bursting through the walls of my flesh. I didn't want him to hear it.
'Why do you always tease me like this?!'
The unfeeling Tohma always seemed to get a kick out of making a fool out of me, but why such a kind touch towards me? One thing I knew was that he didn't waste his time with people he didn't like.
That meant he wanted something from me.
Hell, everyone wanted something from me. I was just tired of it all.
He looked up to the ceiling. 'Can't even spare a minute for me?'
"If only you treated me decently, then I would." I pushed myself away and stood in front of him.
He still sat calmly in front of me. 'Your pride as well as my own won't let you tell me what's on your mind. That's fine, but-'
'What's sincerity, Tohma? I don't have time to talk with you and whatever you want to 'tell me' because frankly…'
I touched his hand and then let go. I took a step back. '…everyone that I knew who became 'defocused' 'cause they fell in love went through hell. I'm not going to be stupid. My brain is all I have. And I have no time.
'You have no time either if your parents want you to get married to some really decent rich girl too. Someone who can go to your dumb parties to be your trophy wife.'
'Mika-'
'I'm not beautiful and I'm just a girl whose father owns a temple. And I don't need to be a saved because you're not my prince as you charmingly want to be.' I began to shake and tears were on my eyes but I didn't cry. I looked straight into him and said, 'Stop bothering me because the one you care for is…'
I took a deep breath and turned my head away with all my courage leaving me. '…my brother.'
Then, with that, I took my bag from the hook. He took a hold of my wrist and I severely eyed him. 'You don't have to use me as a pretense.'
I flicked his hand away and walked away with my stone face to the world. I didn't run. It might have seemed like I cared.
As I went to the park to crumble onto a random branch, I did care. I cared a lot. I cried into my hands without paying attention to the people around me. And when I looked up, there she was looking at me.
She was performing that day, as if waiting for me.
'There was once a caterpillar who walked all over the leaves with no one to talk to. Always trying to find something new to learn about, he ate through all the leaves along the way just to stay alive.
There were kinds of bugs and living things along the way. Some were good and some were bad. But, he kept on telling people she wanted to have wings. Everyone laughed at him.
Then, one day, he shut himself from the world for a while. When he came out, no one recognized him, only his friend, that other caterpillar who believed he'd be able to become a butterfly.
To go anywhere he wanted, he had to make his own wings.'
Nuriko's eyes didn't leave mine as she told this story that left an imprint on my heart as I left to run home as fast I could.
No time to think. No time for anything.
Not even myself.
But how can you make wings from nothing but paper?"
++/++/++/++
From that day on, that girl Nuriko would walk home with Mika just to chat with her over the day. Their chats were simple and sometimes they were very deep. But in that fifteen minutes, the world became a bit clearer even though they made more questions to follow. It was good to talk to someone besides frivolous things like boys, dances, and clothes like their other classmates.
"What is your true dream, Mika?" Nuriko asked as they were turning the corner to Mika's house.
"Music? Something to do with music." Mika smiled the widest smile she'd ever had in her whole life. She knew it too because the muscles began to ache but from a good pain.
Nuriko laughed as she covered her mouth. "Ah, Tohma-san knows you too well. He said the same when I asked him."
Mika's eyes became a bit hard from the mention of that certain name. She had not spoken to him since winter. It was already April and the air was a little warmer than she wanted it to be.
"You talk to him about me?" Mika sighed and shook her head. "He thinks he knows everything. You know that boy only pays attention to things that interest him until they bore him once he's figured them out. That's why his one lasting friend is Sakuma Ryuichi."
She giggled to herself at the thought. Then, she added with another sigh. "He's selfish and arrogant. Always thinks he can get what he wants."
"Really? Doesn't he always get what he wants, Mika?" Nuriko asked as she stopped walking to look at Mika's right profile. "I find that admirable. With all that power he has, he uses it to pave a pathway only he can walk. He's just scary because he's so smart about it."
"Life shouldn't be that complicated." It was then that Mika looked at the worn-out tar road before them. She gripped onto the handle of her school bag. "Unlike dramas and manga, people fight against multiple things inside and outside of themselves. It's not just one thing. And being with someone isn't everything."
"You really think so?" Nuriko grabbed onto one of Mika's hands and rose it to the air, unable to stomach Mika's sad expression. "We're lucky to have what we have, ne?! Ne?! The time I spend with you is like that sakura right there above us. It'll pass quickly and change into something new though it's such a familiar and ordinary thing.
"Of course we have our battles, but the most important is to be able to smile. To be untainted with bitterness and just smile."
Nuriko let go and pushed Mika to go home. "That's why I adore your smile. That's the best part about you but you don't even know it."
"You always say things that make me feel like I'm someone special." Mika grinned from ear-to-ear with tears in her eyes. "And here I've done nothing for you."
"So you say!" Nuriko pushed up one of her pigtails and winked at her.
"But I really-" A confused Mika started to say.
"Go home before you get in trouble, you dork!" And so, the genki girl waved vigorously from behind her.
When Mika went into her home, Nuriko took a deep breath, standing there to collect her thoughts. "I am only able to smile this widely because you exist in this world, Mika."
Then, she left.
++/++/++/++
It was winter again and she slumped down to her bedroom door, holding her breath and the purple journal into her hands. She didn't want to write it down, but to see the words in front of her. What would it all mean?
Would it make any sense?
But when did anything ever make sense?
"I hate cram school. I hate everything. I can't ever do anything right!
And I thought Tohma would leave me alone. He did for a time, but before I knew it, he was back again to ruin my pace.
Nuriko has been telling me that he, Ryuichi, and her are going to make a band. It was funny. Seguchi Tohma forsake his father's hotel corporation? I didn't think he had the nerve. Ryuichi, he always did what he wanted with a whim. He was used to being labeled every type of unkind word you could spit at him because he'd heard it all before, but he was selfish in finding his happiness his way. And Nuriko, the daughter of that other lead company here in Japan (which I didn't even know because I didn't ask those kinds of questions)…they were making a band?
I envied them for knowing what they wanted…
But even more, my unimportant and frustrating jealousy was taking over. Tohma and Nuriko were becoming so close without me. (Ryuichi was coming after graduation to start actual recording.)
And here I was just wanting something to do with music though I wasn't good at anything really except analyzing data. That was easy though.
I'd been observing people and things without talking all my life.
He was there waiting for me when I ended cram school. Or so I thought.
For some reason, I turned my head to look at the alleyway in between the cram school and some business building. There, I found Nuriko holding Tohma's face and tiptoed to kiss him on the lips.
I dropped my book bag with my eyes opened as wide as my mouth.
That was when I knew reality had hit me. It was telling me, "This is your place, Uesugi Mika. And, you must accept it."
I took a deep breath as my bag fell.
Plop.
They both looked towards my direction. I grappled for my bag like a blind person, only seeing them in between my eyes.
I saw Nuriko become frozen as she put herself against the wall. The image was burned into my eyes as I heard nothing but the tapping of my penny loafers on the sidewalk.
The strong girl I knew was stumped? The person I'd admired?
Why did she push him to come to me?
But, I ran as Tohma chased after me. Yeah, I couldn't believe it either. Mr. Seguchi Tohma was running after one of the many girls he loved to seduce with a single touch.
Unfortunately, I couldn't escape his charisma and he had no mercy even though I was his childhood friend.
Then, I stopped. 'Why are you chasing me, you dumbass?!'
Who cared now if I wasn't as proper as everyone wanted me to be? Who cared now?! I certainly didn't!
'Because you've misunderstood as you usually do.' That tone. That tone that rationalized everything. The one that was so calm and made me feel so stupid. I hated it when he used that voice to humor me. Not now, Tohma!
'What's there to misunderstand? I'm tired of you, Tohma.'
The wind blew and we were on the middle of the road that was going uphill.
'Why do you always have to be on the defensive?'
'Because you're going to trick me as you always do.'
'Do you want to know what was happening then?'
No. Right now, I didn't want to hear the answer.
I wasn't as strong as I wanted to be yet to receive that explanation.
I stood there silent, wanting to run as far as I could.
'She was telling me to take care of you.'
'Then why'd she kiss you?'
'That is something only I can tell you,' Nuriko said as she stood behind Tohma at the bottom of the hill.
I stood my ground in the middle of that long incline.
'I…don't understand anything…'
I need to get home. Like a coward, I ran before anyone could tell me anything.
Then, in the middle of the night, I walked out of my house to take a stroll around. It was to clear my mind, but I ended up going to the park about two blocks away from my house.
I sat on the bench.
I was so distracted that I didn't notice Tohma sit next to me. He grabbed my hand to pull me to embrace me until I couldn't breathe.
'Even if you won't believe me,' he whispered warmly into my cold ear, 'I want to marry you.'
I closed my eyes. 'Not this again…'
'Yes, I do admit I love your brother, but at the time, I didn't understand my fascination with your brother. He reminded me of someone and then I realized, it was you.'
I tried to pull away, but his glove gripped tighter over my hand.
'He kept on telling me all the things you did. And through all these years, you always fought hard for something even you didn't know you wanted. But you wanted something more.'
He laughed bitterly. 'I am not perfect. I follow what my parents told me. I've followed everything everyone has told me and I don't complain. I wear a smirk that's plastered as if it were in automatic mode.
'And I have no right to ask someone as genuine as you to be with me. I know that. But I…'
He took a deep breath and his lips almost touched my ears. Embarrassed, yet forward, he honestly said, 'I love you.'
I held my breath the whole time.
'And Nuriko was threatening me that if I proposed to you, it better be serious or else she'd kill me. She sealed it extremely with that kiss. And that rest of that story has to come from you, the person she would do anything for.'
His eyes didn't look at me as he said that last line. It was strange. Even Tohma could be humble like that.
Then, those sharp eyes darted themselves at me again, slicing me with their charm. 'To prove it, I will make the music industry bow to my knees and I'll give it to you, Mika.'
He winked at me as he took off his gloves to rub his hands over my cold fingers. Then, he put his gloves over my hands.
'This will have to do for a ring right now.'
I didn't give an answer to his proposal, but was it better left unsaid as I looked at him not wanting to cry like those dumb girls in dramas and mangas I always got irritated over?
'But that won't be my dream if you do it for me, Tohma.'
My damn pride.
I wasn't planning to come out of my room for a few days. And I was about not to let anyone in until Eiri showed up knocking on my door.
'I don't want to talk to anyone right now.'
He didn't care though. He pushed through the door with Tatsuha in his arms. He knelt on the ground to hug me.
'Eiri-'
'Onee-chan, let's just stay like this for a while.'
It was the same thing I'd always told him whenever he cried. And it was then that I understood Tohma, but became confused all over again.
We squished together and fell asleep against the door with my arms holding them.
Father was right. If there wasn't anything else in the world, I had only them. And they only had me."
++/++/++/++
That girl wouldn't let Mika think. She didn't give her room to breathe.
Two days later, Nuriko showed up on Mika's doorstep and said to her father that she was going to borrow Mika for a couple of hours. Seeing as how he wanted his daughter to leave her room, he pushed her out the door and into Nuriko's arms, who willingly caught her as she tripped out the door.
Nuriko, without a word, pulled her cold hand across a lot of streets to make it to the top of a hill that overlooked their city. There were lights everywhere and they stood next to one another in the darkness.
This was Mika's secret spot. It was the one she ran away to when the world was too much.
So, why did Nuriko bring her here?
"Staying in your room isn't your style, Mick." Mick was the nickname only she'd call her because to her, it seemed strong yet very delicate at the same time. "You always walk whenever you need to talk. Isn't that what we always do to clear our minds?"
Mika didn't say anything. She was absorbing the wind around her and staring at the lights around her. If time could stand still like this, then maybe she could have understood life a little bit more.
But it wouldn't stop for anyone. And her fear was that if she didn't move, nothing would happen.
"But talking and thinking can only do so much. In the end, you have to do something in order to control where you're going," Mika finally said.
Her long skirt puffed out as she squatted down to the ground to hug her knees.
"In the end, I feel like such a coward."
Nuriko folded her hands in back of her and looked up to the stars above them. She glanced at Mika once in a while and smiled. "I walked up here once because I was going to jump off. But there was someone here before me.
"That person shouted, 'I am tired! Why…why does it always come to responsibility?! I didn't ask to be first-born and I only wanted to try my best. But because I don't talk doesn't mean I agree with everything!'
"Then, the person cried so much on their hands and knees. Probably, they didn't know what they were looking for."
Mika looked distressed, knowing it was her…
Her eyes swept from side to side, looking for something to focus on.
"Then, I saw that person again on a rainy day. But I only glanced at her as a customer shouted at me at a café. I was working there because my father said I needed to learn what it meant to get on your hands and knees to earn money. Though his pride was great, he said that I had to start from the bottom. No one ever knew I was that franchise's heir.
"And I met all kinds of people, but on that day, someone shouted at me for spilling coffee all over his suit.
Then, that person was out of view, appeared in front of me. She took that person's hand and shouted, 'What kind of person are you?! When someone is sorry and they mean it, you just humbly take it. And then, it's done!'
The business man was furious. He stormed off and said, 'Who are you to talk to me that way?'
"Just a lowly student," the person sarcastically replied, patting his suit with a napkin as he passed through.
'I'll have to talk to your manager about this.'
'God, that really pisses me off,' the person said as she pressed her handkerchief onto my face.
I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to use my father's name to get by, especially not after what that person did.
"Th-thank you." I blushed and that person left with just a nod, running into the pouring rain.
Then, I dyed my hair and decide to change from that proper, common girl to someone that reflected on the outside what was on the inside.
Mika looked up at Nuriko, who was staring at her all that time throughout her story. She smiled down at her with the same sparkle as if making a wish. "Then, I found out that girl went to my school and knew that damn blond boy I always competed with."
Nuriko scratched her head. "And I was stupid to fall in love with that person since I first saw them on this hill. So, when I told Tohma to make her happy, I meant it. I'd kill him since he'd taken what I'd set out to get and I hate to lose."
"I always wondered while that person left to take care of her studies and brothers, 'Can I be like that?" Nuriko then wiped her nose. "That's why I love you so much, Mika. You are everything I wish I could be, but for a g-"
Mika got up and wrapped her arms around her to kiss her on the lips. Burying her face into her shoulder, she sobbed for the first time in a long time. She let go of all her masks, letting them to all fall invisibly to the grass.
She pounded on Nuriko's back softly. "Stupid, Nuri. You are more than my sister and my best friend. I love more than anyone could love another person. Even more than my brothers.
"Don't ever leave me. No matter what happens in this lifetime, don't ever leave me. If it weren't for all your kind words…you don't know how many times you've saved me from hating myself."
"I don't know why you'd admire someone like me, Nuri."
"There are too many reasons to name."
++/++/++/++
When they graduated, Nittle Grasper was formed. Tatsuha kept on hanging onto Ryuichi's leg when he came for Mika's and Tohma's wedding. And shortly after, Nuriko also got married.
Each had their own aspirations and dreams to fulfill.
For Mika, Tohma put her on a special task to find new talent. They worked as a team to find the best talent all over the nation, even overseas. She went far and wide to the crevices of Japan to search for the quality.
"Anyone could do that," she moped to Tohma sat on his desk chair and she crossed her legs while leaning on his sleek, black desk. He winked at her and shook his head. "No, not everyone can do that."
"We can find people that sing. We can find people that can play instruments. That's always easy to pick out. We need people with quality," he said while flipping through all the piles of applications with his index finger. "People who are strong enough to do anything to make their audience happy. Not because the people like it, but treat them with care."
Mika blinked at him.
"We can deal with the business stuff. They have to deal with the human stuff. Mixing both is hard. Ryuichi's a lunatic."
At that moment, Mika laughed as she put her forehead on Tohma's forehead. She shook her head. "I don't ever understand what's going on in your head."
"You're not supposed to." He rose an eyebrow.
Then, he cleared his throat and looked at her. "That's why you need to do it. I…don't understand people very well."
"Is Seguchi Tohma admitting to a fault?"
"No, just stating that even if I can predict their actions, their hearts are totally unpredictable to me."
She whispered into his ear. "Drives you nuts, doesn't it?"
Tohma smirked. "You derive pleasure from my squirming, don't you?"
"Because you don't do it that often, Mr. Perfectionist."
Before he could utter a rebuttle, she kissed him on the lips and left with a victory sign. She walked out of the record studio and looked up to the sky, which happened to make her nostalgic because it was clear yet cloudy too, just like when she was in high school.
She would never get Tohma and he would never comprehend her either. Yet, they would struggle to. The only way to grow was conflict and understanding, after all.
In life, she understood only three things: Self-respect, be sincere, and to understand others. And that it was built one day at a time.
To struggle is painful, but to fight against bitterness is the struggle to stay a humble human being.
She got into her car and went to visit her brother Tatsuha that day, whom she was trying to calm down from stalking Ryuichi. ^^;;;
Mika called her other moody brother up and he asked her advice on a certain plot twist, though hesitantly because Eiri was childish that way. She laughed to herself and heard a song on the radio only to think of Nuriko and that day up on the hill:
"When you don't have wings, you have to make your own. How come everyone can see what you can't, Mika? Don't you see your own worth?"
"Am I the caterpillar?"
"No. It's because everyone knows a caterpillar can become a butterfly. It is in their nature.
You're the penguin. There is always something more. Much more whenever you touch it, Mika. That's why people are drawn to you, much like Ryuichi.
You take people for who they are and then you let them see they can be so much more.
Isn't that why your precious brothers respect you so much?"
Then, she had a thoughtful look, almost melancholic yet happy also. She thought, "I'll keep this to myself, but in the next lifetime, I hope I can be with you, Nuri. Whatever form that may take."
Owari.
Author's note - I wanted to present a shoujo-ai fic and wanted to have Noriko and Mika grow into the characters that they became later on in the Gravitation series. I like them a lot, so I thought it'd be different to do something that was atypical from my already weird pairings *ahemTohmaxSuguruahem*.
Even though I aimed for this to be about Noriko at first, it came out through Mika's perspective. XD Through Mika, I wanted capture her character through different actions and people as well as her different reactions to make her a very well-rounded character that I've always imagined her to be.
There are a lot of things happening in my life right now, so I'm bubbling with something to say. XD I had started this last September and did the other half today. ;_; I spend way too much time on fics. My new roomie was scared about how much I concentrate. XD Well, considering I have limited time more than ever, I have to pour everything as much as I can.
This is especially to you, Megamie. It's always you who helps me whenever I'm in a slump, whether or not you know it. ^_^
Love always,
Yui
3/26/2006 6:54:38 AM - LA
3/27/06 11:54PM - Tokyo
