Post from kinkmeme:
"Anything Garrus/femshep, Javik/Liara, or Vega/Cortez that plays up the military aspects of their lives. Call it a fraternization kink.
-sex in a bunk
-sex while sparring
-having to face the gossip
-working out kink.
-shower kink.
Or less sexy more situational,
-pulling rank
-comparison of prothean tactics vs other species
-drills of any sort and by god, what would their ditty be?
-whatever other aspects you can think of. "
Will be influenced by the fact that I'm only gonna listen to thrash metal and drink Mountain Dew. Just remember to blame the chips.
Shepard ordered Garrus to the war room over the intercom. She sounded pissed, but Garrus thought he might have just been mishearing her. There was just something about the way she said, "Garrus, get your fat, scaly ass to the war room before I drag you there myself.
Regardless, he left the Thanix Cannon, hoping it could go five minutes without calibration. He thought about how he really needed to work on the stability of the system, given how the cannon loses a quarter-unit of calibration if left alone for more than a couple hours. He made sure to grab a bag of Dextro Chips from the mess before he headed to the elevator. He ripped the bag open and had devoured the contents before the elevator reached the top floor. It was no large feat, as it took the elevator about three or four minutes to move up a floor, a feature Cerberus had regrettably carried over from the original Normandy.
When he arrived at the CIC, he walked over toward the starboard door and entered the checkpoint. He thought for the hundredth time how stupid it was to have a checkpoint inside the ship while he waited to be cleared. When they did, he entered the war room to find that most of the crew, at least those who joined Shepard on missions, was sitting in wait. He took a seat and grunted, noticing his armor felt tight and constricting. He was somewhat skeptical of the gathering, as one would naturally be, and voiced his concern.
"What's this all about, Shepard?" She did not respond, only looked behind him toward James Vega.
"James, door." James nodded and locked the door and came over to stand behind Garrus.
"Shepard?" Garrus was nervous. He usually trusted the Commander - hell they had slept together before the fight against the collectors – but she was actually making him a bit fearful now.
Shepard began to pace; her hands behind her back, clacking boots shattering the silence of the room with every step. "Garrus, this…" she said gesturing to the group seated around the table, "is a intervention."
Garrus chuckled, but he couldn't rid his laugh of the nervous tension it was used to veil. "Shepard, what is there to intervene? I don't understand."
Shepard stopped pacing and turned to him. "Garrus, we are here because of your eating problem." She tried to ignore the surprised look on Garrus' face. "Ever since we received that shipment of Dextro-based food, as per your and Tali's complaints, you have been eating excessively. This wouldn't be a problem, but you have started to gain weight and lose your performance capabilities."
Garrus was offended and became defensive. "I don't have an eating problem. Besides, that food is good, why shouldn't I be able to eat it?"
"Gordo, I took a Guardian's shield to the back of the head because couldn't keep up with us! You gotta quit eatin'." James said, rubbing his still bruised skull and he leaned over Garrus' shoulder.
"In fact, I am mandating group training for all of us. Garrus isn't the only one who needs a workout. Frankly, James is the only one who is in fighting shape, mostly because 90% of his day is spent doing pull ups and sparring. We will meet in the shuttle bay every other day, shower communally – because we only have one shower room, spar and work out."
There was a group moan, with everyone staring angrily at Garrus.
"I'd suggest you all quit wishing death on Garrus' family and get some sleep, we start tomorrow. I'm also locking up the Dextro food."
The next day, everyone was down in the Shuttle bay, without armor of course. It became obvious who had been keeping track of their figure, as Garrus and Tali were showing signs of weight gain. Shepard took Garrus to work with her, while Liara worked with Tali. James and Kaidan worked with each other on weights as spotters, however they mostly worked alone outside of that.
Garrus didn't see much of the others, as Shepard separated them for the sake of keeping Garrus' pride intact.
Garrus was forced into what was basically torture. Shepard pushed him harder than any CO, Drill Sergeant, or instructor he'd ever had. He hated her for it but knew she only did it because she cared. This was just one of her distorted ways of showing she loved him. First on the tough love menu was cardio. That meant running until he collapsed, literally. Shepard also showed him why she isolated him.
"Do you have to do that?" Garrus asked between heavy pants of breath. He was referring to the fact that she was literally running in circles around him while he trudged onward, barely able to continue.
"Nope, but it's supposed to inspire you." She decided he was going too slow, so she swiveled and began to backpedal in circles around him.
"Commander, permission to tell you to go fuck yourself?" he asked sarcastically, as he started cutting into what little energy reserves he kept for such an occasion.
Shepard smirked, picking up the pace to keep up now that he had sped up somewhat. "Permission denied. But if you don't get your ass in shape, I'll be forced to fuck myself, now won't I?"
This pissed off Garrus even more, and he used the rage to fuel his running. But his legs couldn't keep the pace. He tripped himself up and took a nosedive into the floor. Shepard stopped running and smirked once again. "Looks like we're done with cardio for today. Pick your ass up off the floor and follow me, it's time for weights."
Garrus forced himself up and began to follow her, stumbling and tripping as he tried to catch his breath. As he walked, he looked for his water bottle and lo and behold, where would it be but in Shepard's hand? He was not about to ask her for water, so he decided to go without. When they reached the weight bench, Garrus saw what most Americans feared on Earth. It was an old school weight bench, black as every one in existence seemed to be.
"Screw your new tech and equipment, nothin' beats a good old weight bench. Bought this sucker off a high school back on Earth for a steal." Garrus looked at her like she was insane, and perhaps she was, but she was his CO so he had to deal with it. "Now come the question, Garrus." She eyed him curiously. "What'cha bench?"
Upon having to lift the Olympic bar off his neck for the fourth time, Shepard decided to move on to sparring. Garrus might well be a sniper, but by God, there was no way he wouldn't work on his close quarters skills. She lifted the bar up and placed it on the bars.
"Come on, Garrus, one more thing and we're done." Garrus merely groaned in reply, nearly broken. "Get up. We're gonna spar."
Garrus forced himself up, but he knew he would regret it. He dragged his feet as he limped toward Shepard. He stopped in front of her and assumed that sloppiest defense stance she'd ever seen out of him. He'll learn to endure, so help me God, he will. She decided if he wouldn't try to defend himself, she'd show no mercy. She swept his legs, felling him, only for him to be tackled by her. She held him to the ground by his shoulders and looked him straight in the eyes.
She could tell he was beyond exhausted. She was honestly surprised he was even able to move, given the pure fatigue she saw. She knew she done well, though. She knew it was by sheer force of will that he managed to continue. He may have lost his fitness, but not what she truly loved in him, his resolve.
"You did good today, Garrus. I'm proud of you." Shepard said. She let the pressure off of him enough for him to move his arms. He seized the moment, using his last bit of energy to flip himself on top of her. After that, the only thing keeping her down was his dead weight.
"We-ll. Look who turned the tables. Regardless, I doubt you can keep going, so what do I have to do to get you off me?"
Garrus spoke quietly, as if speaking normally would completely drain him. "Two things. First, give me my fucking water."
Shepard was wondering when he would ask, but she had honestly forgotten after the cardio. "Holy shit, I forgot about giving you your water. You seriously made it through that workout without water? Damn, that's hardcore. Here's the bottle." She reached for the bottle and squirted him in the face with it. Garrus didn't know if she was being helpful or trying to piss him off, but he didn't care. The water felt good on his face and he managed to swallow some of it.
"Thanks." He said, a bit louder, as if his voice was just hoarse.
"What's the other thing you wanted?" Shepard asked, anxious to get him off of her.
Garrus grinned. "This." He said, immediately forcing his tongue into her mouth and wrapping his arms around her neck. After a moment, he broke away and stood. He limped away to shower, thinking Totally worth all the shit I'll have to put up with from her now.
Liara was dealing with a complete different issue than Shepard. Instead, she had to deal with convincing Tali she needed to work out without giving the impression that Tali's ass was fat. She was having a damn hard time of it. It didn't help that she had always harbored something of a crush for the Quarian, being the only other tech-inclined person on the ship. She found herself constantly attracted to the Quarian's figure.
"So you're saying I need to work out because if I don't… my ass will get fat?" Tali said for the umpteenth time, albeit with different phrasing.
Liara had grown tired of defending her point and being gentle. "No Tali. You need to work out so you can be fully capable on the battlefield. Your ass is fine. I don't know why you worry about it like this. I like your ass… shit." Tali's eyes grew wide, enough to be visibly different through her visor. "I wasn't supposed to say that. Not that I don't like your ass, but… ah, Goddess."
Tali just muttered to herself. "You like my ass?"
Liara just rambled to herself before just coming out and saying yes.
Tali decided to step up. "You know, the shuttle has very comfortable back seats."
Liara saw where this was going. "Well… sex does burn about 300 calories per hour for someone of your weight."
With that, the two engaged in a 90 minute sex and make out session (A/N: Fuck you, I'm not writing it. I'll write that shit later.)
As Kaidan and James did laps, ran, and sparred, they couldn't help but wonder what they were missing out on. James was the more curious of the two, bringing it up while they sparred.
"Where ya think the others are? Doc and Sparks kinda disappeared." He said, throwing a heavy punch.
Kaidan chuckled, ducking the blow. "Let's just say Cortez will be bitching about the shuttle's back seats tomorrow." He swept James legs, making him drop as if dead legged. "Before you ask, you don't want to know what Shepard and Garrus are doing."
James recovered and cringed. "Shit. Scars and Lola? Fuck, I didn't need to hear that. Goddamn, LT."
Kaidan faltered at hearing his old nickname. James took advantage and downed him. Kaidan was stunned for a few moments.
James, concerned asked. "Hey man, you alright?"
Kaidan came to his senses, "Huh? Oh, yeah. Where'd you hear that nickname?"
"I heard Shepard call you that once. Why? Is it not cool for me to call you that?" he asked sincerely, helping Kaidan up.
"Nah, it's fine. It's just… someone I used to know called me that a lot." He started to walk back to the showers when James called out.
"You alright man? You look kinda… hazy."
Kaidan kept walking, never looking back, and said "Yeah, I just need a shower."
LT, he thought. Damn, I miss her.
