Natasha Romanov doesn't do friendship. It's not that she doesn't really want a friend, it's that the Red Room screwed with her brain, and she just doesn't understand friendship much.

She understands being comfortable around someone, because it happens every once in a while. There are people that she respects, and that is the main requirement for not threatening them daily. Which, she supposes, may be something like friendship.

At the top of the list is Clint, of course.

There's the fact that he didn't kill her like he was told to, which is helpful. He calls her "Nat," and he doesn't push when Natasha goes into her mindplace (a term dubbed by Barton himself), and he's damn good on missions. He's fun when they're off duty. He takes her to this secluded, little beach house (that's actually more of a shack) sometimes, and she's comfortable there because no one knows where it is (it doesn't even have an address). He can almost drink as much as her (and, oh, he tries), but no one beats a Russian.

Then, there's Steve. It takes courage to adjust to a different world and still manage to be a polite human being. He calls her ma'am sometimes and it got on her nerves at first, until she remembered that he was just raised that way. (He calls her Natasha most of the time now.) He's different and refreshing, and she's occasionally comfortable around him. They spar, and he doesn't get tired and neither does she. She likes that.

Pepper is pretty high on the list. She's had to deal with Stark for years, and Natasha respects her for that because she would have killed him and hidden the body in that time. Other than Hill, Pepper is the only woman who's consistently around. She understands Natasha better than even Natasha thought anyone (except Clint) could. Pepper calls this "the redhead bond." Pepper really tries. She gets Natasha to watch Pitch Perfect (which Natasha smiled at) and occasionally ropes Natasha into coffee dates (Pepper, Natasha has learned, drinks some expensive latte with cinnamon and vanilla, contrary to Natasha's plain espresso). Pepper has learned that Natasha is a good listener, and Natasha is happy to let her go on about the latest thing Tony has done to drive her insane.

Most people would call this list "friends." Natasha doesn't do friendship.

Pepper said it well one day, though she was quoting some TV show. "I'm your person, Natasha."


I should be studying for my exams. But I'm not. I don't even know what this is, I got bored and I was thinking about Natasha. The title is a quote from the Avengers.

Please tell me if I made any mistakes. I took a few liberties, and I've only seen the Avengers twice (I've seen Iron Man 2, like, fifty times though).

And the TV quote is from Grey's Anatomy.

-Lou