Written For - The 365 Prompts Challenge

Prompts Used - (dialogue) "I find that answer vague and unconvincing."

Summary - [ Alice in Wonderland!AU, Wolfstar ] Remus meets an... eclectic party.

Notes - Woah, I'm not dead. It's a mcfucking miracle. Here's an Alice in Wonderland!AU because I was in our winter production of it in school and I'm emo that it's over. Also! Happy New Year y'all! I hope everyone has a Not-As-Shitty-As-2017 year!

Title From - 'Secret For The Mad' by Dodie Clark

Word Count - 1183


Remus Lupin looked around the long table with apprehension, not quite understanding why it was so void of people and so laden with tea things. There were only three others at the table, but they seemed too engrossed in whatever game they were playing to notice Remus's trespassing.

He reached out to the nearest colorful, too-tall chair, pulling it out and sitting down.

"No room! No room!" two of the three shouted at him, turning instantaneously and angrily at him with wide eyes. The other just waved their paw at him, then fell back asleep.

"There's plenty of room," said Remus defiantly. The one sitting at the head of the table-the ring leader, Remus supposed-let out a huff and crossed his arms. His large hat bounced and covered his eyes. His too-long, too-wild hair still poked out at the bottom. He took one hand to push it over his eyes, looking at Remus curiously.

"Who are you to say so?" he asked after a moment of studying Remus. "You're nothing but a child."

"We're the same age!" Remus cried indignantly.

"So what," the other conscience one said. On either side of his top hat a bunny ear popped out, which didn't make much sense to Remus saying as he still had two human ears right underneath. "It's still our table." He crossed his legs on top of the table, showing of his furry legs.

Remus turned back to the Hatter. "Do you have a name?" he asked. The boy's eyes hardened as he watched Remus.

"I don't suppose so," he said. "But I don't suppose I'm the one that would know, now would I?"

"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," said Remus flatly. The Hatter let out another loud huff, but this time his hat didn't cover his eyes. He leaned forwards, but it didn't really affect Remus, seeing as how long the table was. It really was a obnoxiously large table.

"How am I supposed to know what people call me? It isn't me that's calling me things," he said.

"We just call him Mad," said the other one. "The Mad Hatter."

"Oh," said Remus. He was not looking at him, but instead watching the Hatter deflate from the mentioning of his title.

"And that's the Dormouse," he said, sticking out a thumb to point at the other, who was still asleep. He gave a yawn in acknowledgement. "They call me the March Hare," he said. He pushed his large glasses further up his nose. He fixed Remus with a strange look.

"I'm, uh, Remus," he said. "Lupin. Remus Lupin." He gulped.

"I'm rather sick of this," the Hatter muttered. He put his cup back on the table. "Let's all move over one, I want a clean cup." The March Hare gave a sigh, nudging the Dormouse awake. The mousey boy stood up, took a quick glance around, looked at Remus for a moment, then sat back down in his new seat and promptly fell back asleep.

The Mad Hatter stood up on the table, walked promptly across, stepping on most of the plates about, and plopped next to Remus, giving him another of his curious looks. His eyes were much wider closer. He was much less intimidating from this close.

"I'm gonna call you Sirius," said Remus. The Hatter jolted back in his chair, looking at Remus in bewilderment. Remus looked at the other two.

"I'm gonna call you James," he said, pointing at the Hare, "And you, Peter," he pointed at the Dormouse. He nodded once. "Yes, that seems about right."

Sirius continued to gape at him.

James stared at him for a moment, calculating.

Peter snored. Loudly.

"Would you like to stay a little longer?" asked James slowly, pouring himself another cup of tea.

"Would you like to stay forever?" asked Sirius, louder than he seemed to have wanted to. James sent him a weird look, and Remus glanced over. His face seemed redder, and his mouth was clamped shut, but he didn't look as if he was going to take his words back.

"Anyway," said James, turning back to Remus, his head cocked. "Where did you come from, anyway?"

Remus shrugged. "Doesn't matter much now, does it?"

"Do you wanna go back?" asked Peter, sleep tainting his voice. Remus shrugged.

"I don't know," he said. "Everything here is just so… wonderful."

"I suppose it is," said Sirius quietly.

"I would want to go back," Peter muttered. He yawned again. "I terribly miss home."

Remus shrugged awkwardly. "Well, you know, I'm not terribly liked where I'm from. I'm kind of the odd one out." He looked around the table. "Though, I suppose you'd know the feeling."

Sirius cocked his head as James furrowed his brow.

"How're you the odd one out?" asked Sirius.

"How would we know the feeling?" James asked Peter, who just snored.

"I don't know," said Remus. He scratched behind his neck, knowing very much why he was an odd one out. "I guess they just don't like having a nerd around."

"Huh," said Sirius. He paused, then said it again.

"Do you know what nerd means?" asked Remus. Sirius scoffed, his hat falling over his eyes.

"Of course I do!" said Sirius. Remus snickered, lifting the hat above Sirius's eyes. The too-big eyes were hard, but softened for a moment. Remus wondered why that was as Sirius continued his rant. "I don't think you should go back to such a horrid place," he said.

Remus shrugged.

"Yeah," James nodded, staring at Sirius for a moment before nodding at Remus determinedly. "You should stay here with us! Right Dormouse?" He elbowed Peter under the table.

"I agree with the last thing said," Peter said.

"Yes!" exclaimed Sirius, turning to Remus with a grin. "You should stay here with us!"

"Peter's asleep, he barely counts as a vote," he said, a small smile appearing.

Sirius shrugged lightly. "Sure, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't stay here. We won't make fun of you because you're a nerd."

Remus crossed his arms, glaring at him. "But I've got stuff to do," he said.

"I find that answer vague and unconvincing," said James from across the table. He smiled at Remus, almost mockingly.

"I'll stay a bit longer," said Remus after a moment. Sirius grinned. "I'm going home though," he said. "Definitely, I'm going home."

"Yeah," said Peter, looking up and properly looking at Remus for the first time. He cocked his head. "And you named someone without a name. No one ever gets attached to what they name," he said, then blinked a couple times until he fell face first into the bowl placed in front of him.

"I'll stay a bit longer," Remus muttered softly.

(He wasn't surprised when a 'bit longer' turned into over a month. He wasn't surprised when his wonder at everything in the strange place faded away. He wasn't surprised when he seemed to be becoming just as bizarre as everything else in the strange land.)

(He liked being bizarre. It made him feel normal.)

(Maybe because nothing was.)

(He liked it.)