The Ultimate Guide to Annoying

Voldemort!


I do not own Harry Potter, Voldemort, What Not to Wear, or any other big names that you recognize.
1. Call him the Man-Who-Let-the-Boy-Who-Lived-Live.

2. Tell him about this great spell for hair growth.

3. Join the Death Eaters. Make a map of the headquarters and carry it everywhere.

4. When questioned why, burst out into tears and shout that it isn't your fault that you suffer from memory loss.

5. Make copies of your map and hand them out to all your new Death Eater friends.

6. Give a copy to Harry Potter with a note saying that the party starts at 8. Include in the note that you are short of a few people and tell him to bring the entire Order.

7.Get him on an episode of Not What to Wear.

8.Sign him up for anger management classes.

9.Ask him why he doesn't have a cool scar.

10.Tell him that red eyes are out of season – green eyes are all the rage.

11.Casually mention to the Death Eaters that he's a half-blood.

12.Call him Tommy.

13.Buy him a T-shirt that says 'Tommy.'

14.Buy yourself a matching T-shirt that says 'I'm with Tommy.'

15.Get him Harry Potter styled glasses.

16.Tell him that since he's so obsessed with Harry, they will help him look more like the boy.

17.Offer to redecorate the Death Eaters' Headquarters for free. leave out that you got a 'T' in Charms and only know the color spells for red and gold.

19.When questioned, say innocently that you wanted to make Wormtail feel more at home.

20.Laugh whenever he starts to talk.


Well, there's 1-20. I have plenty more coming! Please review. Suggestions are welcomed!

Isabel