Even Angels Fall

"Mamoru looked up at her, and almost saw the words forming in her eyes. He knew what was coming. He knew he deserved it.
She looked at him through those clear green eyes, saw her rose-petal pink lips form the words: 'Do you believe in destiny?'
Mamoru was caught off-guard, hearing something that he had once said. Of course he did, he had his Moon Princess and his destiny set in stone for him, although he could dodge fate for a time. How could he not believe in what was so obviously true? 'One...might say that. Why?' he asked, puzzled by her question.
She looked relieved. 'Because you aren't my destiny, Mamoru. I can see it in your eyes, in your eyes I can see you love someone else, you aren't the one.'
He looked at her, and blinked several times. He kept his breath steady, he kept himself calm. His mind screamed, how could she do this to him? What about the dreams they had whispered, after he had surrendered to her and given himself to her? After he had planned everything, what had happened? He couldn't stand not being in control, he had thought by meeting her he had taken control of his destiny.
Her clear, innocent eyes looked at him and smiled. He smiled nervously back at her. Her smile faltered, and she looked a taken back. She could sense his sudden apprehension. 'Mamo-chan?' Usagi asked quietly. 'Is there anything wrong?'
He looked at her, and smiled, cleanly hiding his intentions. He had been playing this façade for a time, now, and he could continue it for a time longer.
'Nothing, Usagi, nothing is wrong. I am just a bit tired.' He held his breath, waiting for her to see through his lie.
She didn't, and started to smile again. 'Oh. I thought that perhaps there was something wrong.'
He smiled, smoothly taking control of the painful pangs of emotion in his. 'Nothing's wrong, Usa-bunny, just those professors who are working me down, that's all.'
'Are your classes going well?' she asked, making more small talk as they walked to Tokyo Bridge.
'They're fine, just tiresome, I suppose,' he answered.
'Oh,' she repeated. 'Well, at least you might learn some new things coming back to Japan, right?'
'I think so,' he said.
They approached the Bay that looked out over the vast Tokyo. A silence lay over the city, a peaceful dusty tranquility that matched the softened fiery tones of the setting sun. Mamoru stopped Usagi as they reached the end of the bridge. 'Usagi?'
She looked at him. She was so innocent, and pure. Everything he would want. He looked at her, deeply into those ice-blue eyes. She was so easy to deceive, and so trusting. He couldn't bear to put the pain on her that he was about to, but this was for him and for her both, so they could take control of their lives and throw destiny and fate without feeling obligated to what they had been destined to.
He took a breath. 'Usagi, do you believe in destiny?'
She giggled. 'Of course, why else would I be with you if not destiny and fate had brought us here now?'
'Well, Usagi, I think that it's time we took control of our destinies.' He felt his cover start to slip, and he let it fall into a thousand pieces.
'What, Mamoru?' She looked at him, startled, confused, hurt.
'I think that we should change our destiny, Usagi. We have no control over the love that we share, and I feel caged, trapped that I would have to love someone. I love you Usagi, but I have and obligation to. That isn't love, that is duty. I can't love someone that I have to love.'
She turned away from him. 'You don't love me.'
He looked at her, sorrow in his eyes, yet relief. 'I love you Usagi, but I don't love you.'
She looked back at him, angry. 'How can you say you don't love me, but say that you do? Just tell me, do you love me? If you don't, I'll walk out of your life, leave you alone, let you change destiny for everyone for your own selfish reasons. But to console me, just give me an answer.'
'Usagi, I don't love you.'
She didn't cry, didn't speak, walked away, broken. She had been shattered, as easily as his mask and his destiny. He was sorry, because he had loved her at a time. But not so sorry as to pretend an emotion as clear and as sure as love. He had been sure, he tried to assure himself. He didn't love her. Something nagged in the back of his mind, something that he couldn't quite grasp, like a forgotten something that was important but misplaced somewhere in the moment of things. It's nothing, he thought. Nothing. I was right.

She looked back at him with those green, green eyes. 'Mamoru, do you understand?'
He looked at her a vague look in his eyes. 'Yes.' He had lost what he had gambled for, and he was trying to accept it as painfully and silently as possible. He didn't have control of anything. Fate had just thrown him a wild card, for a time, but he couldn't escape its clutches forever."

Mamoru woke up with a start. Was he having a premonition? What had he just seen? He quickly gathered up his clothes and started to dress, to go see Rei about what he had just seen. She would know, she might have seen it also.
As he walked in the crisp morning air, he looked over his dream in his mind. Was there any slight bit of truth in it? It's all in my mind, he tried to reassure himself as he made his way to the temple.
Walking along various back streets, he made his way to the Temple. As he approached, he noticed a small sign tacked on the door; it read that Rei was on a vacation to the ocean and would be back the following week. The swooping script did not match Rei's, but her Grandfather's. Rei had probably just forgot to tell Matoki, or Matoki had forgotten to tell him.
It struck him odd, but he slowly went back to his apartment to ready himself for classes. As he passed the Crown Fruit Parlor, he noticed a familiar figure sitting by the Sailor V game. Wispy, blond hair fell out from her odangos as she played the game,


fighting the youmas with little expertise. He smiled and walked in. He placed his hands over hers and helped her fight the last youma. She smiled up at him. 'Hi, Mamo-chan!'
A brief flash of his dream went through his mind. Was it a premonition? But as Usagi smiled up at him, her imperfection beautiful in his eyes, he quickly forgot the dream. With his fallen angel, Usagi, how could fate have given him any better?