Just for once,
I wish I didn't have worry.
Just for once,
I wish I didn't have to care.
Just for once,
I wish I were not normal.
Just for once,
I wish I weren't so empty.
I don't want to worry about my grades,
But maybe worrying if I could save the world.
I don't want to worry about tests and exams,
But worry if my flock is alive.
I don't want to care about someone who hates me,
But caring for my campmates and friends.
I don't want to care about how teachers feel about me,
But care if I learnt how to fight.
I don't want to be a normal student,
But become someone who is running from danger.
I don't want to be a normal person,
But maybe having a God as a parent.
I don't want to yearn for something I know I'll never get,
But just say, "I wish I had a elder sibling who cared."
I don't want to feel so empty inside,
But know that people in this world still cared.
Just for once,
I wish I didn't have to pretend.
Just for once,
I wish that I could do what I like.
Just for once,
I wish that I can trust the way I believe.
Just for once,
I wish I didn't have to mourn.
I don't want to pretend that nothing has happened,
But take off my poker face and show how I feel.
I don't want to smile or laugh,
But cry when I really feel sad.
I don't want to care what I do,
But take off the pressure and go my own way.
I don't want to listen to her suggestions,
But turn my back and say, "I know what I want."
I don't want to doubt if she is truthful,
But pour my heart out to a friend I trust.
I don't want to be scared that she'll betray,
But smile and tell her, "I love you."
I don't want to mourn for someone I don't know,
But kneel down and play with a brother who died before he was born.
I don't want to mourn for someone who died,
But stand up and announce, "My uncle survived the earthquake."
Why do I care about test or grades?
Why do I care what family and teachers feel?
Why do I have to be normal?
Why do I never get what I always wished?
Why do I never get the courage to say what I really feel?
Why do I always see a wall when I walk down the path I choose?
Why do people I love always leave?
Because, I know,
That this is the way life is, and will be…
