Rated: Teen (talk of sexual exploits)/ A short funny
Characters: mainly Michael, Jim, Dwight, and Pam with mentions of the others
"The year was 1985, and the rock scene was a BEAST. I'm talking; I was in my yellow leg warmers and had posters of Richard Simmons on my walls. My mom sent me to therapy, but I didn't like my first therapist. She smelled like goat cheese, or something."
The Office staff blinked at their manager's random response to Pam's question if anyone wanted to hold their July 4th picnic on June 30th.
Dwight twirled a pen in his hand. "How could you look up to that worm? He hides old ladies and midgets in his basement. I have sufficient evidence from one of Mose's ebay buddies."
Jim entered the conversation from the kitchen, drinking a mug of coffee, "And how exactly does Mose know to get on ebay? Through a web portal in the outhouse?"
Dwight nearly cracked his pen in half. "Those don't exist!"
Pam added, "Not as much anymore since people, and you know, modern technology, put toilets IN their homes."
"Web portals!" Dwight cried, flying his half-chewed pen like a missile over reception. Erin ducked in time and applauded.
Michael waved off his irate assistant to the regional manager. "Nobody cares where Mose poops or goes on ebay." He grinned widely and finished, "Packman and I went to a Rolling Stones concert, and maaaaan, did we get hammered! I'm pretty certain I hooked up with a bunch of hot chicks that night because I woke up in a mountain of frilly pink underwear and my crotch was on FIRE! Speaking of which, I think my mullet caught on fire, too…."
Only Creed and Andy whistled. The rest of the staff gagged and resumed their Solitaire sessions.
