Updated: June 17th, 2017

Chapter 1: The Past Hurts

Home. The Webster's New World College Dictionary defines it as the place where a person or family lives; one's dwelling place. Isn't it sad? I had to look that up. I mean, the word has never meant much to me before. It was just a thing I had never had. A home is a place where your family is, where you grow up, have happy memories, and lots of other stuff an orphan doesn't have.

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention I'm not really an orphan anymore. Over the summer I was officially adopted by my cousins on my dad's side. I live with them now in England in their gorgeous home. It's nicer than The Burrow, but it has the same warm feeling to it. The moment I stepped inside the Tonks' home I found I couldn't contain my joy. I couldn't believe they'd been here all along. They were everything to me now; I finally had a place where I was wanted. I now know what it feels like to have a home. Living with my cousins was like a fantasy. I had my own room, I was free to roam about without suspicion, and I could let Solo out at nights.

Andromeda was the mother I never had. She was kind, loving, warm, and a mentor. I learned that she was a gifted Healer after my many escapades climbing trees and running around their modest estate. Like me, Andromeda had a knack for household spells. Something neither Ted nor Tonks possessed. We spent many hours together in the kitchen and living room. The Tonks' preferred not to have the help of a House Elf so Andromeda did the cooking and cleaning herself. She taught me how to make many dishes and by the end of the summer I was pretty good at cooking. Sometimes, when I was out at night looking up at the stars, she would come and join me. Andi (as I affectionately called her) would point out the names of our relatives long past in the sky. She told me that basically everyone on her side was named after stars. I had no idea about that so Andi pointed out her star and mine. The Vulpecula (one of my middle names) star was part of the fox constellation.

Ted Tonks was born to No-Maj parents. It was because of him that Andi was blasted off her family tree. I thought that was wonderful; she gave up her lavish pureblood life to be with him. Their relationship was strong and affectionate. Ted and I both loved to read. Every day after breakfast he'd go into his study and read the Daily Prophet or an old book handed down from past family members. On Sundays, we'd sit in there for hours talking about the differences between the No-Maj and Muggle worlds. Occasionally, Andi and Tonks would join in, but not for long. Whenever I had a friend over, he'd go out of his was to make sure we had a good time; even if that meant staying out of our way.

Tonks was my favorite person in the entire world! She was an Auror-in-Training for the Ministry of Magic and she was also a Metamorphmagus, meaning she could change any part of her person at will. Her favorite thing to change was her hair; usually it reflected her mood but it was mostly always bubblegum pink. My cousin was such a klutz too. She's very clumsy and particularly unskilled at household spells. I love her though. I found her enthusiasm very refreshing. Tonks always found time to spend time with me even with her busy training schedule. We'd go out flying over the countryside and shopping in Diagon Alley and playing all sorts of games. She showed me all the different spells (offensive and defensive) she'd learned through her training with Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody. I was sad that I couldn't try them myself but instead I practiced the incantation and wand movements with butter knives.


The summer going into third year I also learned about some of my family history. My mother's side of the family was basically wiped off the face of the earth. I tried to ask Ted about the Maguire family but he told me to ask Andromeda. When I asked her, she told me there wasn't much to say. My mother, Olivia, was from a respectable Pureblood family. They lived in America up until mid-1960 when my grandfather moved them to London for his job. Apparently, they were the "good" Purebloods; not picky about blood status and all that jazz. Andi was right when she said there wasn't much about them. Tonks took me to the Wizarding Archives at the Ministry of Magic to see if I could find more. All that was listed were the names of the immediate Maguire family. The funny thing was that my dad's name was scratched off the family tree. I held up the paper close to my face and made out a last name. Black.

That night, after dinner, I asked Andi about what I had found. The plate she was holding crashed to the ground, shattering. She was quiet for the longest time. When Andi turned around, her eyes were full of sadness. I remember begging her to tell me about my dad and why his name was removed from the Maguire tree. That night, my life changed. That night, I learned about my dad and his crazy relatives.

The Black family had a dark history and I was not pleased to be a part of it. The Black family has a very long line of Slytherins. Basically, they were all into dark magic, following their 'Dark Lord'. I thought it was a load of crap at first. Andi said my dad had been one of the first to defy this tradition. On his first day at Hogwarts, my dad was sorted into Gryffindor. At 16, he was disowned from the Black family, blasted off the tree. He married my mom just months after graduating and I was born a few years later. I still didn't know much; Andi hardly told me anything. I had to go to Tonks for the rest. She told me that he got a one-way ticket to Azkaban prison after blowing up an entire street of No-Maj and killing his friend. My mom was murdered shortly after. But, worst of all, mass murderer Sirius Black, my dad, had sold out my best friend's parents to Voldemort. He was the reason Harry Potter's parents are dead.

I cried for hours. All my wishes and dreams and fantasies…ruined. I had this image of my family; my dad was darkly handsome and mom was an angelic beauty and I was their perfect little procreation. We lived happily in a wizarding neighborhood where I grew up and learned about magic. I remember praying to God, Merlin, to anyone who would listen that what I was told wasn't true. My dad didn't kill a bunch of No-Maj and one of his best friends. My mom was never murdered because of him. Harry's parents would still be alive. I unclasped my necklace, throwing it in a random direction. Solo hooted angrily in response when the necklace hit his cage. I didn't care. I wanted nothing to do with the Black family.

Then came the nightmares. All the memories were slowly coming back. I remember my mom putting me in the closet. I remember hearing her scream my name. I remember dark, dead eyes gazing down at me in hatred. Bellatrix Lestrange…Andi's older sister. It was her fault my mom was dead. She killed her. I hated her and I wanted to kill her! I remember asking Andi how she could stand it, to know the things her sister has done and do nothing about it. My cousin looked at me through her misty eyes and said that there was nothing she could do. Andi hadn't spoken to Bellatrix in many years.

"Don't be angry at what's past," she cooed. As I fell asleep in her arms, she hummed a familiar lullaby. He used to sing it to me to get me to sleep. It was called All the Pretty Little Horses.

Cora. My dear Coralynn…My darling, say you believe me. I am innocent. An innocent man in a cell made for a traitor.


Summer had come and gone in a blink of an eye. The night I learned about myself was permanently etched into my brain and would never go away. For almost two weeks after I did nothing but eat, sleep, and do schoolwork. I hardly came out of my room until I decided to suck it up. You can't choose who your parents are. Even though I got better (as better as I could be, that is), I was sick of summer and waiting around. I was dying to get back to wizards and witches and magical beasts. Hell, even to goblins and ghosts. But most importantly…Hogwarts's magical feasts!

One night, in my boredom, I decided to build a fort out of my bedroom furniture, pillows, and blankets. Since it was a warm night, I opened my window to let the stuffy air out. I switched on Ted's flashlight, pointing it at a large scrapbook. Andi had made it years ago. The pictures dated back to before I was born and up until I was one. The two couples and two babies smiling up at me looked very happy. I had stared at this picture long enough to know who they were. Harry and his parents James and Lily Potter, and me and my parents Olivia and Sirius Black. I shone the light all over the moving picture, but my eyes stayed on Sirius Black's face. Andi was opposed to telling me anything about him, but Ted did:

"Your father was brave, clever as they come, and the most energetic man I had ever known. He was not content sitting at home while others were in danger. That's why he joined the movement against You-Know-Who in the First Wizarding War. But let me tell you, and don't ever forget it. Your father loved you and your mother more than anything. He would never, ever do something that would hurt his family or friends."

Sirius Black was exactly how I dreamt of him. Tall, well-built with long black hair with striking grey eyes. He carried himself aristocratically. Apparently, that had been passed down through the generations. I was told I held myself with that same aristocratic air at times. I thought long and hard about what Ted told me. If Sirius Black really loved my mom and me so much, why did he do it? If he would never, ever hurt his family or friends, why did he go off the deep end? I came to two conclusions by the end of the summer. One, Sirius Black was a raving lunatic madman who joined You-Know-Who. And two, Sirius Black could have possibly been framed. Someone betrayed Harry's parents and he knew who it was. He blew up that street trying to kill whoever did it but the person got away.

I didn't know what to believe.