Many of my mornings start like this. Before I can even open my eyes I fell the light of the sun hitting my face, the heat making me more lazy than actually aware of the time. As I draw the covers over my face in my weak attempt to shield the sun's ray coming form my window, I hear the unmistakable voice calling from down stairs.
"RUTHIE!" My mom calls. Even though it is a Saturday morning it would be a crime for any Camden kid to sleep pass nine. Though, I know that's not the reason for her call.
"I'm Coming!" I yell a bit more annoyed than I intended to sound. With one last sigh of resignation I pull the covers off my body.
Though, I don't move. I lie there, looking at the ceiling. Then I notice a pattern in the colors that over the years I have missed, or perhaps never taken the time to notice. Soon, I begin to wonder just how many other things I haven't noticed. I laugh to myself at how nostalgic I have become over night. Still, I can't help wonder.
I close my eyes, perhaps thinking it all a dream, but when I open them again I still here my mom calling me downstairs. Today my day won't be a routine as it has been for the past nineteen years, because it all changing. Still, I'm glad this morning is like any other.
As I get up from my bed I see it from the corner of my eye. Its been sitting there for the past three days, not once opened by me. Its been draped out in the spare bed. My mom and Lucy have said that its beautiful, tasteful, but they look at me with confused faces. I tell them the dress has been tailored and there is no need for me to see it all the time, but I know that's not what worries them. It doesn't take much to know what they think, what everyone thinks. I see it in their stares, but none of them say anything. I know what's in my heart…I know.
"RUTHIE CAMDEN WE ARE GOING TO BE LATE!" She yells from downstairs, and so I make my way to the bathroom, awaiting me is a long hot shower. A couple of more minutes won't kill them. After all this is suppose to be my day.
I don't take long because I remind myself that this morning will be just like any other morning. That's all I have. Just this morning. In a matter of hours my mornings, my afternoons, my nights, will never be the same.
I make my way downstairs and I see the rest of the Camden "kids" sitting around the living room. For a moment I stand there. Matt, Mary, Lucy, Simon, Sam, and David all sit there. Flash backs of past years come rushing back. I close my eyes and somehow I wish we could go back. I want to allow myself to believe the possibility, but damn me for being such a realist. When I open them again everyone comes to view. Sarah, Carlos, Savannah, dad, mom, and Sandy.
I didn't notice him a first, but as my eyes begin to wander to the far corner of the room, there, away from all the commotion a silent Martin stands.
He is the first to notice me come into the room, but says nothing. He just stares at me. A piercing gaze that keeps my eyes locked with his. I see the pain in his expression, and he turns away from me. At that moment I can't help but feel a stabbing pain in my chest as he does so, but I make a point not to show it. Lucy is the second one to notice me and she doesn't hide my presence.
"Ready to go?" She says in her cheerful voice, which reminded me of why I had chosen her as my maid of honor.
"Yeah" I laughed and threw a little giggle for effect. It felt fake, but I wasn't sure. I had been doing it so much lately I didn't know the difference.
"Where is it?" she looked at me a bit panicked.
"Where is what?" I scramble in my head to remember what I could've forgotten.
"UH…the Dress" Lucy demands with an incredulous look on her face. I could feel my cheeks go red as I mentally scolded at myself. All I could do was give her a sheepish smile.
"I'll get it" She rolled her eyes at me as she made her way upstairs.
As if I didn't have enough people thinking this was a mistake. Mary was the next to approach me, a sympathetic smile in place. "Hey don't sweat it. It happens to the best of us. You're allowed a couple of mistakes." Her smile warm. And somehow that makes me feel better, and reassures me of what I'm about to do.
Today I would marry the man I loved. I would soon be Mrs. Mac Wilson.
